Like twisted fellow I'm going to also probably make my own version of this story as a project of mine, I'm likely posting it here or on chyoa where I can have at it. But don't want to steal it and will credit you to the best of my cognitive function. I'll wait 2-4 weeks for reply while doing some minor prep work into framing my storyline and development of plot. Any time you want me to stop, tear it down, or other. When it comes to this you can message my account.
(9/8 i guess?) i do realise i may take things to seriously but it really sucks reading a nice story and feeling more and moe uneasy as the protagonist does more and more shitty stuff without it being acknowledged
i have much more to say, but i'll stop here. i hope my message was not too offensive, as it was meant to be more informative. but a someone who seeks to enter a 24/7 TPE relationship, readings stories where it's fucked up like this hurts me. in these relationships the line between bdsm and abuse is thin and all the stories i've read on this site cross it. i hope this comment was usefull and wanted to say that outside of that i really appreciated what i read
i will not talk about the choices of collaring of the old gods as they are obviously made to fit the wish-fullfilment theme, but the fact that chloe wasn't given an unactivated collar or something along thoses lines is just the cherry on top.
slaves, especially the more obedient ones, are in a very dangerous position and need to be treated with care, particularly concerning their mental wellbeing, and the protagonist does not do that at all. i won't talk about all the things wrong in the interview as this is already way too long, but it's BAD.
a few particular examples here would be : she should have been asked about her feelings regarding slave feed (in private, during a no D/s time), same thing betxween the time they learn about the collars ablity and it is put on her, and especially a debriefing about the pain stuff, especially after she said she did not like it. being treated like a slave doesn't mean being treated like shit.
she has become a slave and she was already very submissive, so of course she'll agree to anything without saying a word, even if it's mentally torturing because it pleases her masters. in addition, for the same reason of total obedience, any slave in a 24/7 relationship needs some time daily where they unpack everything that happened and can properly express their feelings without the inevitable filter of a master-slave relationship. Masters cannot read their slave's mind.
the problems here are many, but the main one is that your characters do not understand how consent works (mainly talking about chloe here not the ex-brothel workers). consent is a feeling, it is suceptible to change at any moment for any reason, and that is why chloe NEEDED to be given a safeword. not because they can just release her at any point, but because she needs it to communicate properly :
your handling of good characters having slave is bad, because their actions are badly thought out and higly immoral, and likely ome from someone who has not much understanding of psychological abuse.
to make my position clear, i share a lot of interest with chloe, and have delved very deep in the fantasy of being an actual slave as well as it's realistic implication, and have talk to many people on both sides who practice similar things to different degrees irl.
i just wanted to say that rapeworld isekai was a very good premise and had a very fun start, but suffered a lot from what i call "fantasy moral" and i couldn't finish it because these kind of thing make me want to trhow up.
tbh i dn't ask that you change anything as it's not my position but i wanted to bring your attention to something that you, and sadly so many other writers on this site, seem to have missed.
Rapeworld Isekai started out neat, but about halfway through I felt the story it got bogged down a bit and shied away from its own premise. The story sets out to go and "fight" monsters and stop the taint, but now the story seems to have ended and the gang is still hanging out in the first town.