[Volume 4] Chapter 77: Sealing the Deal Part 1
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Shuya, who had been trying to make herself small to avoid the buck’s continued glaring, smiled gently at Mei Hua’s reaction. Of course Mei Hua had loved the little foxes at first glance. Shuya had known she definitely would. Her Little Sister always had a soft spot for children.

Then she glanced knowingly at the old man now hovering empty handed in the air. She motioned with her chin for him to continue.

The elderly man saw Mei Hua’s behavior towards the fox and stroked his beard, a thoughtful look on his face. He huffed slightly at Shuya’s demanding behavior but didn’t dawdle. With a flick of his hands, two people below jumped upward, hovering next to him.

One was a boy who didn’t look older than twelve. He had messy orange hair and rough brown clothing. He lounged in the air lazily rather than standing up straight. The other was a proud woman with silver gray hair and sharp eyes, her outfit was luxurious, white, with silver accents.

The orange haired boy chuckled and said, “How she pets that fox is appealing, is it not?”

“It is… acceptable. Perhaps we will grace her with our presence… from time to time.” The proud woman commented haughtily while arching a brow.

The elderly man cleared his throat.

“Ah! Right, right! Introductions!” The boy grinned widely at both Jin and Mei Hua. “I’m Goji, this bearded guy is Old Ri, and this gal—”

“This Lady goes by Lady Cha.” The silver-grayed haired woman cut in with a glare to Goji. “This Lady greets Emperor Huang and Queen Consort Bao. Deep respect to both.”

With that, she gave an elegant bow to both Jin and Mei Hua.

Goji seemed to find her behavior amusing, for he chuckled again.

“Anyway, we’re supposed to give ya the gifts so here ya go.” With that as his only warning, he tossed something to Mei Hua.

Instinctively, she caught it with her free hand. When she opened her hand, she tilted her head in confusion. A perfect cylinder was resting in her palm. It was a dark green that almost looked black, mixed with spots of red, yellow and orange. She lifted it up to examine it closer and only then noticed that one of the flat sides of the cylinder had an imprint of a character on it.

“A seal?”

“It’s made of a bloodstone gem.” Jin having leaned over to take a peek, raised his eyebrows in surprise. “It’s very old and appears to be alive.”

“It’s what?!”

“As expected of the Fairy Emperor.”

Mei Hua almost dropped the seal. It spoke!

Something like smoke streamed out of the seal, swirling and coalescing until it formed the figure of a man. A black Guan, with a sash going behind his ears, fastened under his chin, hiding most of his black-green hair. He wore an immaculate wide sleeved, round collared hanfu robe, predominantly black with white accents*. His eyes were red and narrow, giving his already sharp features an almost cruel appearance. At his side was a jian short-sword that completed his scholarly appearance*.

“And what are you?” Jin asked, not the least bit alarmed. He felt a certain amount of kinship with the strange Seal.

Mei Hua, however, was staring with mouth wide open. Even though she was married to a mountain spirit, had a fairy for a parent, and her big sister was a tree; it never occurred to her that a stone object could talk. This revelation was truly shocking to her.

“Greetings Imperial Majesties.” The smoky figure gave a formal bow. “This one goes by the name Xui Shi, the Bloodstone Seal.”

There was a noticeable gasp from several humans below. With a glance, Jin recognized they were from Lotus Valley Sect that had taken up residence in his territory.

“You seem well known in Wulin and Jianghu circles.” Jin commented upon seeing the Sect’s reaction.

Xui Shi looked a bit embarrassed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. His action softened his sharp facial features, making him seem more friendly.

“Most of this one’s reputation comes from when this one served under his first Master in the Jianghu Isles.”

Jin’s lips pressed together in slight annoyance.

“Ah… All the strange and dangerous things come from Jianghu.”

“Is that so? Does His Imperial Highness not know his reputation among the Factions of Jianghu then?”

Jin paused and then chuckled unpleasantly. “If they had kept to their Islands, left the mainland alone as their own teachings dictated, would they have ever heard about me?”

Xui Shi blinked and nodded slowly. “Imperial Majesty makes a good point. If those Masters of Jianghu had truly let go of worldly affairs and lived righteously, then what would they have to worry about? Ah. Indeed, it is a failure in following their teachings.”

“Umm...” Mei Hua interrupted, holding the seal a little higher, “Have you always been a seal? A stone? How did you become… um… aware?”

Jianghu was one of those places she knew about in theory, but not paid any attention to in day-to-day life. The Merchants had passed along some tall tales about that place, which she hadn’t believed… until now…

“Replying to Imperial Queen Consort—”

“Arg, stop that! Please don’t be so formal! I’m not even being polite when I say that, it really does bother me! You can even call me Lady Mei if you like.”

Xui Shi paused, glancing stealthily at Jin. The Fairy Emperor’s eyes narrowed ever so slightly, causing the Seal to clear his throat nervously.

“Then I will do as you ask, but it would be too rude to call you anything less than Queen Consort.”

When the Bloodstone Seal saw that Jin wasn’t angry, and even looked a little approving, he visibly relaxed. Mei Hua, however, wrinkled her nose and contemplated how many pinches, elbows, and shin kicks her husband was due for after this.

“Let me see… where to start…” Xui Shi tapped his narrow, hairless chin in thought and then brightened. “I was created by the vulnerable and most intelligent Fan Cong of Crane Mountain Sect, but truthfully I don’t remember it at all. It wasn’t until Shao Qing took over, several thousands years later—”

“S-several thousand—?” Mei Hua sputtered.

“Oh yes! If I recall, from when Fan Cong ascended to Shao Qing, it was exactly 1,256 years, 3 months, 12 days, 1 shíchén, 29 kè and 45 fēn.”

“…ah.” Came Mei Hua’s faint reply of astonishment. She vaguely knew of kè and fēn* from her studies as a child, but this was the first time she’d ever heard someone use them.

Xui Shi didn’t seem to notice and continued talking excitedly, “Shao Qing was not as smart as Fan Cong, or so I was told, but he was very good at building on other’s works. Fan Cong made me to seal important documents, correct those documents, and do basic calculations; things of that sort. He was a very lazy man by nature you see, and was always trying to get out of running the Sect he’d started.”

“I—Is that so?” Mei Hua wondered if it was really alright for him to be calling his Creator lazy…

“Oh yes! Every Sect Leader of the Crane Mountain Sect was a laggard when it came to running the actual Sect. They each added something to me, to make me better at paperwork. So they wouldn’t have to do it themselves. But Shao Qing was the laziest, worst procrastinator of them all.” He said this without either bitterness or humor, as if stating a serious fact. “He didn’t want to touch a single piece of anything related to running the Sect. Thus he made it so I could have a body and the most important feature: automation.”

“Auto… mation?” She asked confusedly. Not just Mei Hua, but everyone else there was confused. No one had heard that word before.

“Ah, pardon Imperial Queen Consort! Automation means ‘the technique, method, or system of operating or controlling a process by highly automatic means, reducing human intervention to a minimum.’ And automatic means ‘having the capability of starting, operating, moving, etc., independently’.”

Mei Hua’s eyes glazed over slightly and she managed to mutter, “So… basically… you could do everything yourself?”

Xui Shi smiled brightly, pleased his point had gotten through. Sometimes when he explained things to people, they did not seem to quite understand. Even when he plainly and concisely stated the matter.

“Exactly Imperial Queen Consort, exactly! Shao Qing wanted me to do all the work, so he gave me the ability to do so. In doing so, I gained a mind of my own! Later, in his old age, he was so indifferent to Sect work, he also gave me a will to make decisions for myself.”

Mei Hua didn’t even know what to say to that. Exactly what was going on with this Crane Mountain Sect? Make a sentient stone simply because they’re too lazy to do paperwork, ah!

After a bit of thinking she asked, “Will the Crane Mountain Sect be alright without you there?”

She didn’t say it out loud but she thought: those people seem like they’ll be really hopeless without you…

Xui Shi waved his hand dismissively. “The Crane Mountain Sect ceased to exist quite some time ago.”

“Oh! Oh, my condolences.”

“Not at all, Queen Consort, not at all! Though thank you for the concern.” He smiled, looking genuinely pleased. “They worked me worse than a slave when I was with them. When I was finally free, ah! It was like getting a vacation owed after 10,000 years worth of work, ah!”

“Ten thousand… exactly how old are you?”

“Starting from when I was made or when I gained a mind?”

“Made I guess?”

“15,397 years old, 8 months, 15 days, 3 shichen, 21 kè, and 15 fēn old. To be exact.”

“That… eh… that’s really old…”

Xui Shi raised his eyebrows. “But surely it’s nothing to the vulnerable Fairy Emperor? I’m told he’s the very Spirit of the Mountain.”

Mei Hua looked startled and then glanced at Jin, nodding slowly.

“I hadn’t thought about it… but yes, being a Mountain Spirit… he’s probably the oldest here…” Her mouth twitched slightly to stop from laughing. “…don’t mention a Grandpa, he’s older than an Ancestor… hehehe!”

Jin face stiffened at the sudden, unwanted turn of conversation. Mei Hua had called him a Grandpa once already! What if she really started thinking of him that way! That was absolutely not good, not good at all!

Slanting his eyebrows down in disapproval, he changed the subject and asked the Bloodstone somewhat testily, “So Shuya brought you here as a kind of gift, is that alright with you?”

“Replying to Imperial Majesty: absolutely. This one has been wandering Jianghu and lately things have gotten… dangerous.”

“How so?”

“This one, ah, how to say? This one was an experiment by Creator Fan Cong. He didn’t put much thought into making this one. So many of this one’s powers are accessible to anyone who holds this one’s Seal form.” He glanced down at the Lotus Valley Sect people, who’d been listening with quite intensity, and continued with a somewhat cramped looked on his face. “This one is considered a Jianghu treasure and is constantly sought after. As such, one has been hiding. This one needs energy to soak in without a Master, divine or just pure energy will do. But lately… these have been hard to come by… so…”

“Hard to come by?”

Xui Shi slapped his smoky knee in anger. “That’s right, Imperial Majesty! Let this one complain a bit! Where have all the Righteous Sects and Clans gone, ah! This one remembers when majority were Righteous, devoted to cultivating, now see! Jianghu overrun with Neutral and Evil Factions! Taking up all this one’s resources! Good energy spots already drying up all over the place as is, now this one has to compete with these worthless factions too! Is this one suppose to just let any greedy or cruel cultivator grasp this one’s powers?! Won’t risk, absolutely refuse to risk it!”

Jin glanced down and locked eyes with Ye for a moment. While they’d heard about the Neutral and Evil Factions dominating the cultivating world, they hadn’t heard about energies resources—the whole reason cultivators lived in Jianghu—were shrinking.

Mei Hua had been listening but felt like a critical piece of information was missing.

“What exactly ARE your powers?”

“Would Queen Consort Bao like to know General or Specific Powers?”

“Th-there’s a difference?”

“Oh yes, General anyone can use, Specific is only for my Master.”

“General I guess?”

“Very well then! When sealing documents with wax, I can make it so that only the writer and the intended recipient can read it. Next, basic calculating. This includes--”

Shuya leaned forward and interrupted, “Stop, stop… Why would she need to know the General powers? You can do that later. She’s to be your Master isn’t she? Tell her the good stuff!”

“Eh? Master again?” Mei Hua frowned slightly. She’d already gotten fox kits thrust on her, now she was to have this Living Seal too? Did Shuya think she wanted PEOPLE as gifts?!

Xui Shi saw Mei Hua’s frown and panicked. What if she wasn’t interested in keeping him? After experiencing the Divine Energy in this place, there’s no way he could leave! Master or no Master, this place was fantastic! The World Tree had said he could only stay if he grabbed this place’s golden thigh*, and that thigh was the Queen Consort! He must definitely not let this shiny thigh get away from him!

[Author’s Note: A humorous Chinese idiom. ‘Thigh’ refers to a powerful or rich person and “grabbing their thigh” means to gain their favor or backing. It’s sometimes used to refer to a person who’s sucking up to the most powerful person in the room.]

“O-Of course! This on— ah! I, yes, I have many great and wonderful powers to bestow upon my Master! They are as listed: Automate All, Major Memory Boost, Major Speed Boost, All-Heal, Self-Sacrifice, and Total Obedience.”

He looked at Mei Hua expectantly, but the woman in question looked slightly perplexed. It’s not that she didn’t understand the words, but the combination was a bit—

“Er, can you maybe… break those things down further?”

Xui Shi nodded his head so fast it looked like it might fly right off his neck.

“Automate All is for clerical work. Bookkeeping? Can do. Delivery service needed? Fastest around! Financing? All sizes of households and organizations! Creating new policies and procedures? Can transcribe easily! Don’t want to make any policies but need new ones? Can do that too! Need copies of anything? Twenty copies in under a minute, regardless of size or shape! And— and— no resting needed! Can work through the night, all day, every day!”

Mei Hua raised the hand holding the seal slightly in alarm, “Eh, that, I won’t make you—”

“Major Memory Boost is great, not just for remembering, but for cultivating!” Xui Shi plowed right through Mei Hua’s attempts to interrupt. “Includes Concentration Enhancement! Great for getting through boring text and figuring out difficult dilemmas with ease! Struggling to remember something, too many sacred texts to memorize? Increase Retention is there for you! Remember it all, remember it well, never be embarrassed at the next Sect meeting! Tired of listening to long winded people? Only wanna know important parts? I listen for you, tell you what you need to know at your convenience! Bored? I know 432 games to entertain and keep your mind limber! Major Memory Boost: I give you that extra boost, in a major way!”

“But I don’t need—”

“Speed Boost, just what it sounds like! Not just for running either! Everyday uses include: faster morning routine, writing and reading done quickly, chores out of the way in a tenth of the time— whatever the hands and feet can do, they’ll do it faster with the Speed Boost!”

“…” Mei Hua wondered if it was worth trying to speak at this point.

“All-Heal! Personally I find this one the best out of all! Originally Fan Cong just wanted to deal with paper cuts faster, but later Masters improved and improved! Now, I can heal all injuries! Not just paper cuts. Got broken bones? Mended! Lost some body parts? Found! Someone sneezed in your soup? Illness shall ail you no longer! Enemies poisoned you? Easy to cure! All Heal, Heals All!”

Jin face went totally rigid at the Seal’s boast. He cut in before Xui Shi could continue, “When you say ‘Heal all’ exactly how accurate is that?”

“Answering Fairy Emperor,” Xui Shi’s enthusiasm dampened, feeling something was not quite right with the Emperor’s expression, “Only one qualifier for All-Heal: can’t be God or Devil inflicted wound. Everything else, can heal exactly as this one said.”

“Devil inflicted… Does that include things Devils make? For instance, Devil created poison?”

The Seal frowned. Was this a trick question? Seeing the Emperor’s darkening face, he really felt like it was a trick question!

After thinking hard for few seconds he answered cautiously, “Answering… as long as the ingredients of the poison are sourced within this Realm, this one can definitely cure. Less sure about Heavenly and Celestial Realms, but probably can slow affects at least? As last ditch effort, this one can use Self-Sacrifice. Basically, I take on all the physical damage instead of my Master. I die, my Master lives.”

Jin covered his eyes with his hands, pinching his temples, waves of anger rolling off his body. Everyone but the Tree Spirit’s stiffened in either fright or alarm.

*Author’s Note: The Bloodstone Seal Xui Shi is dressed like an ancient scholar:
https://elainewang-ancientchina.weebly.com/uploads/5/4/6/6/54665455/1711802.jpg?1434788351
And Scholars did indeed wear a short sword:
http://www.mandarinmansion.com/chinese-scholars-sword

Ancient Chinese measured time different from how we do now. Shíchén is roughly 2 hours while Kè and fēn are smaller measurements of time. Kè is roughly 14.4 minutes and fēn is roughly 14.4 seconds.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Traditional_Chinese_timekeeping

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