The next time I woke, it was mid to late afternoon – that gray area between 3pm and 5pm, where you usually felt antsy, torn between finishing your shift like a professional, and wanting to go home and eat nachos in front of the TV in your pajamas while eating cheese from a aerosol can.  I still felt like shit – the aching was pretty severe – and I took a few advil for the pain, choking them down with a glass of water from the bathroom.

 

                The bathroom mirror didn’t show any major differences – my face looked softer, but still mine – and I think my shoulders looked a bit different, but honestly, I still looked mostly like me.  If I had to guess, I’d say I looked a teeny bit androgynous.  Probably only my dad would notice at this point, but it was still a concern.

 

                “Siri, can I talk to you?”

 

                *Sure, Jason.  What about?*

 

                “My appearance.  Why do I look androgynous?  Is this going to get worse?”

 

                *First, your appearance might edge a small bit further towards androgynous – but not by much.  Nothing more will happen, unless we both want it.  You look androgynous because I’m female, and my hosts are usually female – but I promise, nothing further will change unless you want it to!*

 

                “What!?  Is this reversible?  Why didn’t you tell me?”  I yelled, starting to feel a mounting panic – before something clamped down on it, and I began to calm.

 

                *Because you would panic.*  Siri replied.  *I told you the truth about your changes.  I wouldn’t lie about that.  But what you need to know is that my people are gendered – male and female, like yours – and we usually bond with hosts that match our gender, to avoid situations like this.  I didn’t have a choice – if I hadn’t bonded with you I would have died.  I’m sorry, Jason.  I was scared.  I wasn’t ready to die yet.*

 

                Shit... For real?  “I’m sorry too, Siri.  Is this all that is going to happen?”

 

                *Unless you want to go further, yes.  I can’t undo what is done, but if you wanted, I could take it further.*

 

                “How much further?”

 

                *All the way to female, further.  You would be capable of bearing children, having periods and all that mortal stuff.*

 

                “Mortal stuff?”

 

                Siri sighed.  *You’d better sit down.  I wanted to wait, but obviously, I don’t have a choice.  Just so you know, this is going to get complicated really fast, and it will probably freak you out, even with me clamping down on your emotions.*

 

                “Umm... Why would a host want to change genders, if they weren’t transgender?”

 

                *It makes the bonding more complete, and the interface between myself and the host more compatible.  I would be able to bestow more abilities upon a willing host, and they would be able to channel my power more effectively.  Plus, many in time learn that being a woman is pretty damn cool.*

 

                “Let me guess – it can’t be reversed if you go full girl?”

 

                *Pretty much.  It’s a one way ticket.  I don’t know how to make bodies male. Sorry.*

 

                “So a girl who found your male counterparts would be in pretty much the same situation as I am?”

 

                *Yes, Jason.  It can cause mental distress for us and our host – which is why we try to pick hosts of the same gender.  I feel your distress too, Jason – so whenever you panic, I feel panic too.  I’m clamping down on your emotions to save me from distress as much as to save you.*

 

                I sat on the edge of the bed, still dressed in my jammies.  “So what’s this about ‘Mortal stuff?’”

 

                Siri paused, unsure of what to say.  *Should I come at it slowly, or rip the bandaid off quickly?*

 

                “Quickly, please.”

 

                *I am a Valkyrie, and my brothers are Eihnerjar.  We serve the Aesir, whom many of your people once saw as gods – and whom some, such as yourself, apparently still do.  I guess to put it bluntly, you’ve bonded with a female warrior angel.*

 

                Oddly, I believed her.  I don’t know why – but I felt she was telling the truth.  So I did what any sane person would do at that point.  I nodded, grunted “Huh?” and promptly passed out.

 

 

 

*              *              *

 

               

                When I woke this time, it was already night.  The room was dark – and I was absolutely starving.  I groaned in pain at the whole body aches I had, and struggled to my feet, the revelation of Siri’s nature forgotten in my need.  I staggered to the kitchen, and all I could smell was the meat and pasta casserole I had prepared earlier, and my stomach growled so loudly, I thought it might have been someone else in my house! 

 

                *Hey Jason.  Are you okay?*

 

                “No.  Hungry.”  I said, scooping the cheesy, meaty mixture into a bowl, and grabbing a spoon.

 

                *Then go eat.  We’ll talk when you’re done.*

 

                I nodded, and sat in front of the TV, eating so quickly I didn’t even realize I hadn’t turned the TV on.  In moments, the bowl was empty, and I went back for a refill.  In the next forty minutes, I ate about three quarters of the crock pot’s food – and finally felt normal again.  Thank the gods!  How much am I going to need to keep eating, I wondered.

 

                *Not much more, Jason.  With all the sleep you’ve been doing, and the food, the bonding is nearly complete.*

 

                “That’s good.  What time is it?”

 

                *I don’t know.  Look at a watch or the TV – I can’t magically tell the passing of time any more than you can.  I think its close to 8pm or 9pm, if it helps.*

 

                Too late to call dad, I thought.  You can still hear me, right?

 

                *Yes, Jason.*

 

                “That’s good.  So what happens now?”

 

                *I guess it depends.*

 

                “Are the Aesir actually gods?”

 

                *I guess it depends on what you define as a god.  Are they all powerful, all knowing, and so forth?  No – and as far as I know, nothing is.  They are incredibly powerful beings, and like Valkyries and Einherjar they don’t age like Mortals do.  They can grow old – but it takes an immense amount of time – tens upon tens of thousands of years – and they can be killed, but it is incredibly hard to wound them unless you are a being of similar power.  They call themselves gods, and they made us – Valkyries and Einherjar – to be their soldiers and servants.  And they possess powers that you would likely call magic.*

 

                “They don’t call it magic?”

 

                *Some do.  Some treat it as a science that can be studied and manipulated... but to the Aesir and other beings like them, wielding magic is something they do as easily as you turn on a water faucet or a television.  My people have similar, but lesser powers, and if our bond is strong enough, I can bestow magical powers on you... Like how I said we might be able to save your father.*

 

                “So they aren’t gods but they are?”

 

                *What I meant was that if you define god as being a being that is all powerful, all knowing, and all loving, then there is no such being I know of in existence.  The Gods made mankind in their own image – which means they are capable of great heroics and great villainy, great emotion, or callous cruelty.  Just like humans.*

 

                “So god as we know him, her or it, doesn’t exist as far as you know?”

 

                *No.  As far as I know, there are a plurality of beings your people know as gods, who have come to Midgard at one time or another, and then left.  Some still linger – but for the most part have left Midgard for the time being, to give your people a chance to mature.*

 

                “Huh.”  I sat quietly, thinking about Siri’s answer.  The Aesir were real.  My gods – my beliefs were based on fact, not myth – and I was bonded with an angel of sorts.  “I suppose a lot of our myths and legends are messed up and wrong?”

 

                *Some are.  Some, well, we don’t yet know.  We hope some are wrong, like the whole Ragnarok thing.  Some of them are quite true.*

 

                “So, I could go to Asgard one day, if I wanted?”

 

                *Yeah, I suppose you could.* Siri replied, sounding like she was smiling.  *You could wander around heaven for a while.*

 

                “Incredible.”  I paused, wondering what to ask next.  “What if the power you can give me right now isn’t enough to heal dad?  Is there anything we can do?”

 

                *Yes, but I suspect you won’t like it.*

 

                “What?”

 

                *Right now we are bonded enough for us both to survive, and wield a fraction of my powers.  If what you possess right now isn’t enough, the only way to save your father will be to bond with me fully – and have me transform your body to a female one to fully integrate and complete the bond.*

 

                “Damn.”  I sighed, and leaned back against the couch.  There was no doubt in my mind that dad was worth it, but I really didn’t want to have to do this unless there was no other choice.  “Can we try it out as we are first, Siri?  I’m not even close to ready to choose the nuclear option.”

 

                *Of course, Jason.  I care about you as I care about myself.  We are one, now – and we will have to find a way to work together from now onwards.  By the way, my full name is Sigrid.  Siri is the short form, like Jay or Jace would be for Jason.*

 

                “Pleased to meet you, Sigrid.  Do we need more bonding time?”

 

                *The last of the bond should be done by morning.*

 

                “Then maybe you’d better start showing me what I can do now, so that I can help dad tomorrow.”

 

                *Not in your pajamas, Jason.  Get some durable clothes on and I’ll teach you what you need to know.*

 

                “You know, its going to take a long time for me to accept everything you told me tonight.  I mean, really accept it.  If you hadn’t been keeping me – us – from freaking out, I think I’d be a useless mess right now.”

 

                *I know, Jason.  You’re welcome... but I can’t keep it up forever.  It is draining to alter your emotions and feelings, and its not healthy for either of us to get used to that.  I’m going to ease up on it for a while – but if I feel I’m losing you, I’ll clamp back down.*

 

                “I get it.  You know, I don’t think I’m in panic mode – more like deeply disturbed.  I think it’ll be okay if you let go some.”

As I said it, I could feel Siri ease up on the control – simply because I could feel some fear, disquiet and stress seep back in... fortunately it was at a manageable level.

 

                *You are very resilient, Jason*

 

                “One of the perks of being me, I guess.  I’d better go get dressed.”

 

                *If you want me to show you your new powers, then yes.*

 

                I stuck my tongue out at her, and went to my room to get dressed, listening to her laugh in my head.