Chapter 8-3: Messages Away from Mecchen House
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Chapter 8 - Messages Away from Mecchen House (cont.)

Jamie gave me a sock on the shoulder this time. “It’s just a phone.” He grumbled through the routing, and I recharged the phone card. We did agree that I’d be square on my turn to pay after this. Nathan leaned close when the phone started ringing. Jamie gestured for Nathan to come closer. They shared the phone and waited. I kept a safe distance and partly-covered my ears. Above anything else, sounds really got to me sometimes.

Sure enough, after a dozen rings, the high-pitched sound came again. No one answered before the tone ended and the other end disconnected. The sound touched something deep in me, even though I was a fair distance from the speaker. Jamie and Nathan both rubbed their ears.

Jamie was somewhat skeptical. “Could it be this phone is just really lousy? Maybe if we tried another one?” I made sure he knew I wouldn’t be paying for another call, and he didn’t try it again.

He looked around and posed, “Maybe we could do some more research? I mean, if we ask different questions, maybe we’ll find something? Also, we still haven’t looked into the changes that are happening. What about gender-bending texts?”

Unfortunately, as I noted to him, our research help just went to lunch. He grumbled and said, “Well, I’m sure not ready to go back to that estrogen-covered place. Besides, Ms. Ishida is probably out and about at this hour. Or cleaning. Or otherwise preoccupied. It wouldn’t be right to go back now.”

I tried to give Jamie a skeptical look but it was hindered by an arc of light that traced an artful pattern of color across the image of my glasses. It took a poke by Jamie to bring me back. But I found myself staring at the shadowed-tracings of his artistic form. It looked like he had a subtle tan with the low-light. A small, rose petal shade of white glinted off his soft cheek. His eyebrows showed through his front bangs. His full, brown eyes gave off a gentle, uneven ‘U’ of reflection. The dime-like shadow of his small hill of a nose…

I had to pause a moment there. I went back to his eyes. They were as brown as could be. Jamie brought the dark pinnacle of his eyes down, looked at me, then back at Nathan. He inquired, cautiously, “What is it?”

Nathan noticed immediately as well. I told Jamie first, “You might want to go take a look in the bathroom mirror again.”

His hands immediately went to his chest and groin. Neither alarmed him. I told him to use the mirror and to ‘look higher’. He rushed to the restroom, and I thought I saw an indistinct fluttering when the door shut behind him, like some part of Jamie was reaching out. We waited.

We didn’t have to wait long till a high, distressed voice called out through the wall. I wasn’t sure to go look or wait. Nathan was equally frozen and perplexed. There came a pattering of feet. The door swung open. Jamie’s hair was much longer.

Before, it was mostly on the top, framed like a feathered-duster snow cone. Now, it looked like a golden bird reaching her wings down, almost completely encircling his face. Bands of hair had replaced plumes across his forehead. A particular bang ended in a tooth-like point that touched his nose. In the back and on the sides, the hair reached his shoulders like arched-fingers. His eyes were the same color of brown I’d seen a moment ago. They looked terrified.

He whimpered lightly and peered at us. I looked back as sympathetically as I could without betraying how pretty I thought that hair looked on him. Nathan seemed wholly-spellbound. Jamie came forward, his shadowed-pink mouth open, and said, “This can’t be happening. Why is this happening now? It wasn’t as bad before.”

He reached for his shoulders and his hands darted back when they made contact with hair. His head moved lightly left-and-right as he said, “This just isn’t possible. This is a girl’s hair. And my eyes. I can’t have brown eyes.”

I knew it was entirely possible. All the changes thus far had happened like a sudden edit between one moment and the next. They’d been subtle so far. Small changes here and there. This sure seemed like an acceleration. Jamie’s question was valid. Why now? Was it the phone call? Was it being in this world too long?

Jamie soon came to his own conclusion. “When we were in Mecchen House… nothing much happened. Nothing this big. I hate to say it, but maybe that place really is some sort of sanctuary. Remember Ms. Ishida said it used to be a place for men. Maybe it keeps you from being weirded out?”

It wasn’t really the most reasonable theory but none of what happened lately was reasonable, so I figured it was our best shot. Nathan checked behind his head. His hair was still the same. I thought I saw disappointment on his face.

Jamie was back to being antsy. “You agree, right? We gotta get back there.”

It was still our best lead, so I quite agreed. I didn’t prod Jamie for changing his mind so quickly, and I didn’t ask him what we should do if things stayed accelerated even back at Mecchen House. He already looked to be at the verge of cracking. I put an arm around him. I could feel his hair caress my arm. It really felt like putting my arm around a girl. Jamie must’ve felt something similar because he shrugged my arm off a moment later with an “umm, sorry.” At least he didn’t threaten to hit me.

Nathan offered a few words of comfort, but that didn’t help either.

Jamie looked at the ground and grit his teeth. “People who look at me are gonna think I’m a girl…”

I reminded him of all the ‘pretty boys’ in this world with long hair. That calmed him a little, or at least gave him the resolve to say, after a few moments, “My stomach feels like it’s trying to leave me, but I think I’ll be okay. Thanks.”

When we were outside, Jamie’s hand mimed reaching out for my cuff. With a quiet gulp, I asked if he needed to hold my arm. He didn’t look up. He just said, “That’s something a girl would do. I ought not to do that. I’ll be okay. The ill-feeling is fading. I just feel a little shaky.”

Nathan moved closer. “If you need any sort of support, I’m here for you. I know a support-carry that’s considered pretty manly, if that helps. It’s one which firefighters use.”

Jamie gave a small note of appreciation but said, “I can make it on my own. I’m just unsettled. I want to run and run and keep running and just hide from the sensations. Close them off and make them go away. I know they’ll just go away. I hope.”

I couldn’t help thinking of Shiori’s memories. Jamie tugged at his collar. “Although, I’d probably crap-out while running and give in. On the plus side, my chest has finally stopped itching. Heh. That’s something, I guess.”

We didn’t say anything more ‘till we were back at the train station. The shadows were small and sharp. The sun shone almost-directly overhead. At least our train passes were still good. The train we wanted was at the other end of the station. The schedule said we had ten minutes before it arrived.

Jamie sat at one end of the bench, with me and Nathan at the other. We understood he wanted his space. Nathan stretched his legs and asked me, “You feeling alright?”

I cracked my knuckles with a kaleidoscope of light and dark as they caught a band of sunshine in the shade. “I should feel worse. But I don’t feel that bad. There’s just too much to see. It keeps me from thinking about it all too much.”

Nathan nodded. “Understood. Sorry, I haven’t said much lately. I kinda feel the same way. It’s hard to take it all in. It’s like… being adrift on the sea. I’m just glad I’m not alone. I’m glad I have both of you with me.”

I gave Nathan a slight smile and nodded. Jamie tugged at his pants and declared, “I swear these things feel looser than before. That can’t be good.” He fidgeted and rubbed roughly at his cheeks. I watched carefully. Something sparkled like a tiny diamond from the side. I leaned over Nathan and asked Jamie, “You okay, buddy?”

He pressed roughly on his cheeks and turned away. “Nothing.” I leaned back and asked, “Sure you don’t want to talk about it?”

His hair flipped when his head darted to look at me. He hastily brushed it away and said, “I don’t want to talk. Talking never helps anything. It doesn’t get me any closer to fixing things. It only hurts”

After that, it was pretty quiet between us until a girl with short, dark hair like mine walked over and smiled at Jamie. Her massive eyes were like polished crystals full of sky. She brushed a long lock over her ear and bowed to Jamie. She wore a light, white blouse with oversized sleeves. A brown, checkerboard purse clung to her shoulder. She fidgeted to keep it from falling and wiggled ‘till it finally stayed put.

She wore a gray, long sundress which fanned out around her legs like a slender bell. It matched her long socks. She spoke to Jamie, “Excuse me, ma’am. Is the seat beside you open?”

I could imagine a whole series of ways to respond. Jamie picked none of them. He looked up at her and said, “It’s open, but I’d prefer if you sat somewhere else. Sorry. Also, I’m not a girl. I’m a boy.”

She turned her head, waited a moment, then bowed. “Understood. My apologies. You look really nice, by the way. Have a nice day.” Then she walked off. She found a seat further down. I watched Jamie to see his reaction. He looked calm. I moved around Nathan and scooted closer to Jamie. He looked to me and moistened his lips before saying, “Looks like that Shiori girl is in the minority when it comes to seeing us as boys. Or maybe I’d pass her definition of a girl now too.”

I moved my hands a little and said, “I wouldn’t worry about that too much. You still look plenty like a guy.” Jamie gazed at me. Wow, with that androgynous face, those gentle shoulders, that long hair, and trimmer limbs, he could really pass for a Katsumi-type girl.

He pulled out his shirt a little, then let it pop back. “At least I’m still flat as a board. And, last I checked, everything was still okay down lower. But I’ll go use the restroom, and check, just in case.”

I nodded and asked, “You feel alright though?”

He blinked and said, “I feel like I need to pee.” And he left for the restroom near where the girl with my kind of hair sat. She rummaged through her purse. I scooted back near Nathan and said, “Hey…”

He returned the word and asked, “You think Jamie will be okay?”

I didn’t know and I said as much to Nathan. He rubbed his hands lightly. “I wish I could do more for him. When he came here, he tried to jump in front of a bus. I can’t help but feel responsible for what almost happened to him.”

I tried to remind Nathan that Jamie was doing that because he thought, and so did I, that this was all some sort of dream. And when you think you have a dream you try to break the reality of it. I remembered that Jamie’s extensive DVD collection included Vanilla Sky. It’d been a while since I’d seen that. Musing about it unsettled me. I let a single breath flow into and out of my lungs.

Nathan looked concerned. I assured him, “I’m just thinking something over.” I knew Nathan had seen the original film which Vanilla Sky was based on, so I used that.

He said, with a frown, “I thought we pretty much figured out this place isn’t a dream.” I assured him it wasn’t that and said, “It isn’t this place that makes me wonder. It’s our lives back in what we’d consider ‘the real world.’ It kinda hit me with a few things but remember what Shioriko said… She remembered being a boy, but certain details were better and some were worse. What if that’s our future? How will we know we were anything but girls if this continues?”

He had to chew on the question but, after a few minutes, he posed, “But, if that were so, would 'real' even matter?”

I could only shrug and say, “I don’t know, buddy. I wish I did. It’s not something I try to think too much about. Like we both said, we can only take this one moment at a time. But, remember, you can’t bear all this by yourself. You’re not responsible for it. Don’t wear the blame. Focus on what you can do to help yourself. Okay, buddy?”

Nathan held his chin and slowly nodded. Jamie emerged from the restroom with his hands held out. They looked slick. The girl with hair like mine stood and took something from her lime-green purse. She offered it to Jamie. It was a bit of paper that shimmered brightly in the noontime light. A gray, feather-like bow wrapped around it. He accepted it carefully, opened it, and used the paper to dry his hands.

The girl put her lime-green purse over her shoulder and smiled. I watched her. She seemed quite pleasant, but something about her kept me looking. Something just over her shoulder which I couldn’t see.

The train pulled into the station. Jamie came over and steered clear of the noonday crowds exiting the train as he stuffed the leftover paper in his bag. Nathan offered to carry our bags. Jamie said it was the manly thing to keep it with him. I wanted my personal items in easy reach. I slung mine over my shoulder. I’d nearly forgotten I had it.

We had plenty of room to stretch out this time. I placed myself between Nathan and Jamie. I gazed out the window. The girl with the lime-green purse gave me a pleasant look. Only when she was out of sight did something click for me and I had to ask, despite how sullen Jamie seemed, “Was her purse always that color?”

Jamie hadn’t noticed. Neither had Nathan but I was sure I’d seen a checkerboard design before. Did she have more than one purse? If so, she was good with sleight of hand. I asked Jamie for the paper she’d given him. I examined it. I’d heard of people on the street in Japan who handed out paper with their company info on it for free advertising because of the poor amenities of some restrooms. I inspected the wrapping. The ribbon had a lovely style. The company information was missing. I frowned at Jamie, but he was already taking a nap with his arms wrapped around him. I decided it was best to let him rest.

I felt something like a soft breath blowing at me. I looked around. The light through the windows of the train seemed to be tinted differently. I found that odd since it was a long time from sunset. I looked further up. My bangs were all over my forehead now and they were bright red.  

Checking my reflection of the window, I could tell my hair had grown several inches. It wasn’t as much as what Jamie encountered but it was significant. I had long, red locks that extended from the top of my head to my shoulder. Whereas Jamie’s hair looked like a long, blond curtain, mine seemed more like an ironed-down clown’s wig. It looked too smooth and even. It was unnatural yet it existed on my head.

It took me several more moments before I realized what else had changed.

My eyes were dark blue.

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