Chapter 17-2: Clues from Mecchen House
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Chapter 17 – Clues from Mecchen House (cont.)

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Before long, we were done, or at least as done as we could be with Ami’s generalized restrictions imposed upon us. Yet, as we were winding down, Ms. Ishida still trudged on, as if invigorated by this act of cleaning.

Soon, the vacuum was out, and she was tending to the hallway. She sent Keiko downstairs and told her to throw anything out of the fridge which was labeled before or on this date. We followed her down, slipping our sweaty gloves off.

Jamie shook his hands and inquired, “What exactly was it that made you swear off skirts and blouses, Keiko?”

I was guarded but pleased that Jamie hadn’t taken a sarcastic tone, but then I figured the development of my hips reminded and subdued him to the prospect of further changes. Walking was still unsettling, especially down the stairs.

Keiko still had her gloves on. She opened the fridge and peered around inside. She turned to look at us. She held onto the fridge door like a supporting limb and said, “My family. More than anything else, I worry about them. If this world is truly the same place I grew up in, only changed, then everyone who was inside it was affected in those missing nine months that passed in an instant for us.”

Jamie’s face remained stony. “If you want to feed yourself irrational worries, then that’s your decision. If you want to put all your faith in something seen in a flash, you go right ahead. I’m not that kind of person.”

He turned to face me. “I don’t believe a single word you said. But I also can’t completely dismiss what you said, in theory. I’ve had plenty of creepy little moments that make me think of home. But creepy moments are not proof.”

I leaned forward. “I thought you were a pessimist. Isn’t it more pessimistic to believe our world is gone, and there is no way to ever get back to it?” It felt like a dark cloud wrapped around my lungs to speak those words.

He folded his arms and sent a wave through his hair. “Well, I said I can’t dismiss it. But I’m not going to say it’s Planet of the Apes…original, not the wretched, awful 2001 version…just because of some weak reasons.”

I blinked. “Planet of the Apes?”

“Or Planet of the Girls. Whichever works for you. The point is you haven’t shown me a Statue of Liberty. Without clear-cut evidence that what you experienced has any validity to it, it’s just hopeless speculation. And I’ve had enough of that in my life with my mom fretting over every single little ache in her body and my sister following suit.”

Keiko shook her bag and put a few more items in it. She apologized. For what, she didn’t seem clear on, but she said, “It’s my decision not to wear those clothes. I don’t feel like it is right for me to wear them. That’s all.”

Jamie shrugged, tightened the pins in his hair, and pronounced, “Good enough for me. We should head out. You ready?”

He looked at me and, glancing downward, added, “I’m assuming you’re fine walking with those hips.”

I stepped around in place. I gave him a nod.

We needed to collect our wallets and other necessities, but it wasn’t long before he led the way out. I waved to Keiko, who smiled back faintly.

-----

I tapped the heels of my shoes as I shut the door to Mecchen House behind me.

Jamie trudged down the steps. Moving seemed easier when I didn’t think about it. I felt a familiar sense as he hurried on ahead of me. I called out to him, but he didn’t slow. I peered through the trees, trying to find the street beyond. I skipped every other step, but he was still moving faster than me. I leaped at him as we came to the clearing. I shut my eyes and craned an ear for the roar of a truck.

I heard nothing but a grunt and a gentle poke in my side. I opened my eyes. We were on the curb. The street was clear. My arms were wrapped around Jamie in a clinging embrace. Jamie’s face was lowered and bright, hot red with embarrassment. His voice was so tiny as he responded, “…let go.”

I released him from my arms. He leaned against a tree trunk, quivering with little tremors.

I told him, “I was worried about traffic.”

He dipped his head back as his voice returned to normal, elaborating, “...From the dream.”

I decided not to dispute it, “Yeah.”

He took a step away from the tree and stumbled. From my angle, it just looked like a trick of light and shadow, but I knew Jamie’s hips had changed too. He realized this as well. His pants were sliding up.

He tugged on them, but they kept rising. There was quite a difference between the size of his waist and the span of his hips. Mami also had wide hips, but they took on the appearance of an upside-down funnel. Jamie’s new lower half looked like a stretched onion. His hips were lovely and round in such a way to contrast with his slender waist.

I didn’t pretend to know anything about the science of hips, but if there was such a thing as truly child-bearing hips, then Jamie sure seemed to have a textbook example of them. I opted not to say anything about it since he seemed embarrassed enough.

I attempted to help him, but he edged away from me and took careful steps ‘till he seemed able to walk with his new arrangement.    

But he soon rested against another tree and muttered, “...This is too much.”

“Need some help?”

He retorted, “Not from you.”

“Why?”

A car passed slowly by, a silver sedan, turning at the gas station.

Jamie had made a definite effort to occlude his feminine appearance and yet, as he stood there, the very fact he tried to hide it just seemed to accentuate it even more. Of course, I couldn’t speak for how I looked.

Jamie finally answered, “Because of what we talked about before, over there.” He gestured with his head towards the far dash of green which marked the area of the path at the center of all that had happened to us.

I wasn’t sure who to be upset at, but I was ticked that I was put in such a place that doing anything for Jamie was paired with this ‘sexual tension’.

“It hasn’t changed any?”

He stared right at me for a moment then looked away. “Oh yeah. If anything, I think it’s gotten a little worse. It’s like being out somewhere warm. A deep warmth that permeates everything and stays there even when you’re away. Which is why I’d like you to keep a certain distance as we walk. I was almost able to put it out of my mind ‘till you grabbed me.”

I agreed to that without argument. I didn’t intend to get close to Jamie. But then I didn’t intend to do what I just did either, so I couldn’t promise him that it would never happen again. I told him as much.

He rubbed an eye, sighed at approaching clusters of anime girl walkers, and conceded, “Fair enough.”

We made our way around the gas station. It looked much more active than earlier in the day. Just a boxy, blue truck was using the pumps, but a few young girls were coming out with weighty, brown bags.  The stage has been filled, I thought to myself.

Jamie paid more attention to the people. We passed a school-uniform-clad girl with brown hair on our right. She gave Jamie a quick glance-over then looked at me. Her hair scurried along as she moved, two clenched claw-like locks of hair from the top of her head framed the sides of her face while two spindly sections paced with the beat of her steps.

Her outfit was a typical sailor design with a red ribbon on her front and alternating light and dark blue on the collar, cuffs, and skirt. The dark blue matched her eyes. She scanned me with them.

The way she looked at us seemed strange. There was a whole language communicated from her features. It was so layered. Before it was just like discerning between ‘I’m interested in you/I’m not interested in you’. Or was that simply all I was reading before? Here it seemed she was acknowledging a silent agreement, assessing us in so many ways, and telling something about herself at the same time. Then, she waved. It was a little wave. I waved back, unsure if I sent the correct reply. Jamie looked away. And then she went on her way. At least, she didn’t seem offended by us.

More passed us by with some shadow of that first glance. All were friendly, as if welcoming us into a kinship with giggles and smiles. Jamie hid his face from them and trudged on further.

We climbed the footpath across the busier road. I took the steps slowly. Halfway across the span, a woman who looked several years older than Ms. Ishida, but with blond hair like hers, smiled and bowed to us.

Her eyes twinkled with peace. She looked tall compared to many of the girls around and absolutely towered above us. She was large in form and bountiful in her chest, wearing a silken, shimmering dress. Even Jamie couldn’t resist glancing at her smile.

I looked after her as she passed. My thoughts returned to the ‘vision’ which had caused so much worry for me. These people who walked among us, lived among us, who felt so real, were they different before? Were they my apartment neighbors? Were they my co-workers? Were they people I’d seen at the Gravina Gym? Had these people lived in different forms nine months ago? Was Hitomi responsible for what happened to them? Was it really all for our sake? Why?

The questions and half-realized theories began to re-propagate in my mind. But as the lovely, blond woman made her way down the steps on the other side, one feeling stayed with me: She seemed so warm and happy.

I couldn’t keep a smile from my face. Jamie coughed a cute little cough and encouraged me onward from further along the elevated path. He sure moved well for someone just figuring out a new center of gravity. The down steps were a little bit harder than the up ones. The steps from Mecchen were the easiest but then I wasn’t thinking about walking then, I was focused on Jamie’s safety. I tried to keep myself from dwelling on each step and just let them come naturally. I half-stumbled once and nearly fell into Jamie at the end.

He winced a little, but I noticed he didn’t move aside. I gave him a smile, and he narrowed his eyes at me. “Congrats. Now you can walk like a girl down steps.”

I kept a little bit of my smile but said nothing, which seemed to annoy Jamie more than any statement I could imagine. He put a bit of Katsumi in his walk as he led the way to the wooded path.

I’d lost track of how many times I’d gone down it with Jamie, back and forth. Still, I saw new things this time. There was a still, colorful dew on the low-bending leaves and branches that looked like lovely little silver bumps. The ground felt softer too and moved a little when I pressed it with my shoes. Perhaps a small storm had passed by since earlier in the morning.

A bundle of leaves had curling, yellow tips with brown on the end. With the light seeking through the coverage, they looked like little green, pointed candles smoldering in the dark. I rubbed one I could reach with my fingers. It felt warm.

Jamie pushed a branch aside and shook his hand to get the dew off, muttering to himself. I wondered if he was going to stop or try to find a pathway back home this time but he just led the way through till we came out the other end.

As soon as he touched pavement, he stopped. I walked around to face him and asked, “What’s wrong?”

He was looking forward down the alley and explained, “I’m not great with directions, but I know how to find Carolyn’s shop. I think. The library and Shioriko should be easy since it was marked on the maps last time. But how the heck are we going to find Azako High School and Nina?”

He had a good point. With the dark creature in Ami’s room, the persistent changes, and other strange events, it had slipped my mind to ask anyone for directions to Azako. I imagined Jamie had plenty on his mind as well.

I wondered a bit about the fact we’d neglected to ask for directions and considered mentioning the implication to Jamie but, before I could say anything, he raised a slender finger and noted, “We can ask at the police box.”

“You don’t mind?”

“Why would I mind?” He blinked at me.

I decided to let the possible gender cliché go and pointed out, “You had an issue with them last time. They mistook us for girls.”

He folded his arms, sighed, and remarked, “Well, they won’t make that mistake again.”

I frowned and asked, “Are you alright?”

A bit of wind found its way through the trees and slipped over Jamie’s hair, which crested and fell like banana cream waves.

Jamie calmly raised an arm to fix it and stated simply, “Quite.”

I figured it was time to put my foot down. I gave a little stomp. Not the Katsumi kind but firm.

“You said to me, on this same path not so long ago, that you wanted some answers, that you wanted to understand. I want the same. Right now. From you.”

Jamie circled around a few times in place and eventually came to face me. His face was full of stony sternness, only translated through soft and gentle features. As a result, he evoked Katsumi more than I figured he intended.

“You want answers? From me? What about the answers I want from you? What about your crazy little ‘vision’, which each time I think it over, has more things right with it than I can imagine wrong? What about that? How about the chill I felt in Ami’s room which made me think of something dark? I didn’t show it, but it made me wonder.”

Jamie leaned against a tree and continued, “What about the strange sensations that have been building all the while? What about the very motion of one leg moving past the other which keeps tightening like a vice around you? What about realizing the way you always moved before is so strange and disconcerting with every step and wondering if it’s supposed to be normal? What about knowing you have the shape of a cute girl and feeling nothing strange in return? Not as though feeling anything is something you expect. It’s just… You fear losing hope and losing yourself in the process. So you… So I… just decided I would push it all aside, I would see myself as the man I always used to be, maybe home in on some childhood memories to make it alright, acknowledge what was happening but not really let it sink beneath the surface. So, that’s what I did. But with the worry of every person we pass by, the shell cracks a little. ‘Till it spills out.”

I offered no words, and Jamie made no motion that he wanted to hear anything from me yet. He squeezed his face in his hands. It looked really cute. He continued, “I can’t even imagine what Carolyn is going to say when we get over there. Those are the answers I want. I want certainty. I want a rock-steady reality in which I can walk along and know what to expect. To know that my relationship with you is a certain way. Not to stand and fear what I’ll feel next. From within and from all around me. Truly, I do feel like my home has been ripped away. But I have a system, so I don’t break down and crumble into nothingness. What do you do?”

His question was almost accusatory, as though I had a special way of dealing with all these changes, that I knew something he didn’t. I wished I did. I had flashed with fury a few times. I had lost it. But so had he.

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