The prismatic world rearranged itself, experiences flowing like water through the scintillation. As the ceremony faded, another memory took its place, as that permeable gust of loneliness blew through the expanse - seemingly drifting through the current of his life itself. The apparition coalesced, as a massive university building stood tall above the young man.
Running through the corridors, a strident and dissonant bell rang with sepulchral chimes, resounding across the empty air of this coruscated world. The young man rushed down the corridor as he entered a lecture theatre, barging in as he huffed and puffed, taking a moment to collect himself. Standing there, he could feel the eyes of the room upon him, as hundreds of faceless students stared back at him - their facial features dulled by the inadequacies of memory.
Trying to avoid their gaze, he sat down in a row near the back of the classroom, next to a young woman who, unlike the others, had a face as clear as day - a warm radiance evident within her dark facial features, as if the memory itself were trying to foist them together. As if he were trying to fix the mistakes of his past by reforming his memories. They talked, they smiled, they listened - and for a fleeting sliver, that emptiness felt briefly filled.
All the love I'd ever wanted
And hoped for from this life,
Sat before me with a smile.
And in that moment,
I was warm,
As the pair talked, the world seemed to morph, the dull lecture theatre fading into shades of red and white. Sitting beneath the alcove of a nice Italian restaurant, the two laughed over a two course meal that neither of them could usually afford, but they didn't care about that. It was a special moment. The taste of the pasta, al dente, had hints of carbonaric1Meaning: Consisting of a Carbonara-style flavour. Yes, I made up another word, and no, I will not apologise for it either. beauty, only accented by the taste of bacon - a perfect palette of savoury flavour, like a portrait painted in taste upon the tongue.
However, more beautiful than any pasta taste was the girl sitting opposite, with her friendly, heartwarming parvris2Defined in earlier chapters. A soft smile. seeming to illuminate the world around her.
It was a moment etched
Into the essence of my ego,
Lost in the depths of her eyes,
I felt I'd found myself,
As recollections of assessments, exams, and classes became blurred together by the passage of time, the young man felt briefly contented - both his results and his life seemingly radiating with possibility. Though saddled with mountains of student debt, he wasn't detered: in fact, far from it. He chased his dreams in the present and cared little about the affairs of tomorrow. Living with his mother and brother still, the young man had fought hard to make something of those dreams he dared to dream. He was going to become somebody, change his destiny, and finally be defined not by his circumstance - but by his spirit. However, life has a way of making nightmares of one's dreams.
Mirages scattered and realined, as the metronomic beeping of a life support machine rang through the ether. His mother sat beneath the white sheets, her face sickly and despairing as her two sons stood over her, with tears in their eyes. She was sick and in poverty. In this place, those two facts alone were a death sentence. As his mother slowly faded, the boy sat beside her with the company of his partner, agonising as he sobbed. Deteriorating as she lay in that bed, barely affording the limited care that kept her alive, she cried as she spoke her final words to her son.
Don't worry about me,
I'll always be proud of you,
Whether it's from Earth or Heaven,
As that final, deathly ring chimed from the life support machine, he sobbed as he sat there with his family. An apparition of Vincent stood among the mourners, a solemn and thoughtful expression upon his face. With that droning chime ringing out, nurses tore into the room, dispersing the crowd as they said their final goodbyes. The nurses tried desperately to save that fading life. It was to no avail.
The white walls of the hospital fluttered as they twisted and rearranged themselves, cream sheets and ivory walls repurposed, taking on the shapes of white drapes and marble columns. The wedding hall was nearly full, and yet, somehow so empty. The young man had left two seats unoccupied at the front of the hall - in the hopes that from someplace afar, his father might come, and from someplace above, his mother might join them. Neither came. As his partner wore a white dress, wandering down the aisle with her father by her side, she smiled. It was a special moment, she was just happy to share it with him. Walking the carpet, they stood facing one another as they said those words.
With the words "I do"
Two words locked two hearts together,
United as one,
In that moment, he wanted to be there for her, he wanted to ensure that they would never have to suffer that same fate that his mother had - dying from debt. He'd have a family to raise soon. He wanted to bring his children into a world where they would never have to worry about that, he had to do that: for them. As he begun to raise a family, that relentless pursuit of accomplishment he'd once been freed from, now ensnared him once more. As the white church began to fade, grey walls sprung up in their place, as office desks spread like wildfire across the ethereal plain. Staring at his desk, writing some advertiser's slogans into a computer, he stared soullessly into a screen littered with meaningless jargon and vapid gibberish. He detested every moment of it. Yet, he had to do this. His family needed him here.
He'd make a better life for his kids, he said in his heart, even if that meant he couldn't be a part of it.
