Chapter 8: My First Kimono
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I heard the footsteps walk up to my door before they knocked. "We are coming in!" was the only warning I received as two Felinor woman walked into my room. Both young, well at least my current bodies age anyway, "Lady Murasakikiba, you are being summoned for breakfast this morning. We are here to tend to assist you this morning and have brought appropriate attire."

I sat up, slightly dazed. The sun was barely up, and the air was still cold. It must be early. As I tried to get my bearings, I noticed the women had stopped and were staring at me. "What time is it?"

The women exchanged glances before one spoke up, "It is a few hours after sunrise."

"I see." I said. Mornings were not one of my least favorite parts of the day. I looked at the attendants and one of them was holding what looked like a dress. I moaned and threw the blankets back over my head.

The two women chuckled and I could hear them whispering to each other, "The Mistress is quite the lady."

I peeked out from under the blanket, just enough to glare at them. "I am not wearing that," I muttered, my voice muffled by the fabric. The two attendants exchanged amused glances, their ears twitching. One stepped forward, holding the dress—no, the kimono—closer, its fabric shimmering in the morning light.

"But Lady Murasakikiba, this is tradition," she said gently. "You must present yourself appropriately before the others. It would be seen as disrespectful otherwise." The other nodded in agreement, adding, "It is the custom of the house, after all. We only wish to help you look your best."

I groaned, sitting up reluctantly. "Fine, fine," I muttered, rubbing my eyes. "But I don’t know how to put this on." The moment I said it, I felt foolish. A noble not knowing how to dress herself? My face flushed, and I could already sense the judgment in their eyes.

Before they could move closer, I swung my legs out of my bed and stood up, crossing my arms. "Do I really have to wear this? It’s just breakfast. Surely, I don’t need to dress up for that." It was then that I noticed I was still in yesterday's clothes.

The attendant holding the kimono gave me a look that made my stomach tighten. "Lady Murasakikiba," she began, her voice calm but with a razor edge, "you are no longer a mere guest here. We are your servants, bound to serve and uphold your household’s dignity. You must present yourself properly, for your appearance reflects upon all of us."

I blinked, taken aback. "My household?"

The second attendant stepped forward, her voice softer. "Yes, my lady. We serve you and are beholden to you alone. Everything we do is to ensure you are respected and seen as the lady you are."

I stared at them, the weight of their words sinking in. They weren’t just here to fuss over me—they were my attendants, and I was expected to act like someone deserving of their respect. My stomach twisted in knots.

"But why would you serve someone like me?" The question came out quieter than I intended, my voice betraying the insecurity I felt. I wasn’t noble—certainly not in the way they thought. How could they look at me and see anything more than a fraud?

The first attendant, still holding the kimono, paused and looked at me with a sympathetic expression. "Because you are Lady Murasakikiba," she said, as if that title alone could erase all the doubts bubbling inside me. "It is not our place to question your worth, my lady. We are here to serve you."

I blinked at her words, feeling the unfamiliar weight of the kimono as she began to drape it across my shoulders. "But... where did you even come from?" I asked, trying to understand. "Why would you be tied to someone like me? You don’t even know me." My voice trembled, betraying how out of place I felt in all of this.

The second attendant, her hands deftly tying the sash around my waist, responded softly, "We were chosen to serve this house and its lady long before you arrived, my lady. We belong to this estate, and by extension, we belong to you now." She met my gaze, her eyes firm but gentle. "It is not about who you were before. It is about who you are now, and the responsibilities you carry."

"Responsibilities..." I echoed, the word feeling foreign in my mouth. I was struggling to grasp what that even meant here. Responsibilities as a noblewoman? As... whatever they expected me to be?

She nodded. "Yes. You may not feel like the lady of this house yet, but that does not change what you are to us. We will serve you, help you grow into the role, and make sure you are seen with the dignity you deserve."

"But I don't deserve it," I blurted out, the words escaping before I could hold them back. My chest tightened with the anxiety that had been building since I woke up here, in this body that felt foreign. I couldn’t possibly live up to whatever noble image they had of me. "I’m not... I wasn’t born into this."

The first attendant, her expression softening, stepped back to admire the fit of the kimono. "Many are not born into the roles they find themselves in," she said, her tone still respectful yet firm. "But that does not mean they are unworthy of them. Worth is sometimes proven by action, not always by birth. You will find your way, my lady."

Her words hung in the air as they both stepped back to assess their work, but I still felt small under the weight of it all.

As the attendants finished draping the kimono around me, one of them reached for a small box resting on the dresser. "Now, my lady," she said, opening it to reveal a selection of delicate jewelry—intricate earrings, a silver bracelet, and a stunning pendant. "You must wear these as well. They will complete your look."

I eyed the jewelry warily, an unsettling feeling creeping into my stomach. "I don’t think that’s necessary," I protested gently. The thought of adorning myself with such things felt... emasculating. I wasn’t a lady—I didn’t belong in this role, and I certainly didn’t want to accentuate it with trinkets.

The second attendant placed a necklace around my neck, frowning slightly as she surveyed the sparse decor of my quarters. "These rooms feel so empty. It’s a shame. A lady of your status deserves a proper setting. We will have to remedy that soon."

"I don’t mind," I insisted, trying to sound more convincing than I felt. But they exchanged glances, their resolve unshaken.

"Perhaps not," the first attendant said, adjusting my sleeves to fall just right. "But a well-furnished space would bring more comfort, my lady. It’s important for you to feel at home here."

Before I could respond further, a polite knock broke the tension in the room. "Lady Murasakikiba?" Rael’s voice drifted through the door, respectful yet insistent. "May I come in?"

I blinked, surprised at the interruption. Given how he had barged in the night before, I hadn’t expected him to ask now. "You may enter."

Rael stepped inside, his expression calm and composed. "Will you be attending breakfast?" he asked, his tone brisk yet polite.

My heart raced at the thought of refusing. "Wait, I can refuse?" I was tempted to turn him down simply for the thrill of it.

Before I could voice my excitement, the attendants chimed in unison, "We are ready, my lady." They shared a knowing look, their enthusiasm palpable as they straightened my kimono one last time.

As the attendants completed my look, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. The silver necklace with a sapphire shimmered against my skin, and despite my reservations, a twinge of delight coursed through me.

As we made our way out of the room, I glanced at Rael, who maintained a casual demeanor, deliberately avoiding meeting my eyes. I brushed aside any thoughts of his indifference; my mind was on the young Felinor girl from the night before. I wondered who she was.

As we approached the hall, I noticed it seemed different from the previous night. The long table was now set with an array of beautifully arranged dishes, and each guest was flanked by their own attendants, all dressed in elegant garments that reflected their status. The vibrant colors and intricate patterns of their clothing contrasted sharply with my own simple kimono.

Nessa sat at the head of the table, but the seat of honor remained conspicuously empty. She looked up as I entered, her expression a blend of welcome and authority. The attendants guiding me exchanged nervous but excited glances.

I walked toward the table, my confidence wavering as I approached the seat opposite Nessa. Without thinking, I settled into the chair without waiting for an invitation, assuming it was simply a matter of choosing a spot. The sudden silence that followed was deafening, and I sensed the collective tension in the air. My attendants flinched slightly, their expressions a mixture of concern and alarm.

"Lady Murasakikiba," Nessa said, her voice calm yet firm. "It is customary to wait for the head of the table to invite you to sit, especially in the presence of others. Please, move to your proper seat." Her gaze was steady, guiding me toward a spot further down the table, away from her immediate presence.

I felt heat rising to my cheeks, a mix of embarrassment and frustration. "I didn’t realize," I muttered, the weight of my ignorance heavy upon me. With a nod of acknowledgment, I stood and carefully shifted to the indicated seat, trying to regain my composure.

Once settled, breakfast was served, and the aroma of various dishes wafted through the air, tantalizing my senses. I glanced around the table, taking in the elegant spread and the dignified manner in which everyone else was eating. It was a far cry from the casual meals I was used to, and I couldn’t help but feel out of place amidst such refinement.

As I picked up my utensils, I noticed Nessa watching me, her expression unreadable. Once everyone was seated, Nessa cleared her throat, drawing the attention of the table. "Before we begin, I want to outline the appropriate ways to dine as members of the nobility. It is crucial that we adhere to these customs to maintain our reputation and the dignity of our households."

She proceeded to explain the proper use of utensils, the etiquette of passing dishes, and the importance of conversing lightly during meals. I listened closely since I did not want to make another mistake.

Nessa paused after her instructions and opened the floor for questions. Several of the other attendees chimed in, eager to clarify aspects of the dining etiquette. "What should we do if a dish is not to our liking?" one asked. Another inquired about the best way to handle awkward silences during dinner conversations.

“Um, if I may,” I began, trying to sound casual, “I know we are considered nobles, somehow, but what makes someone stand out as deserving of special attention? Like, um, what kind of qualities might be noticed in someone, perhaps like a Felinor, who seems… unique?”

I tried to phrase it delicately, hoping my inquiry wouldn’t seem too direct or reveal too much about my actual curiosity. I felt Rael’s gaze shift slightly, and I sensed the interest from some of the others at the table.

Nessa glanced at me, her expression thoughtful. “Great question, Lady Murasakikiba. In our culture, certain traits are indeed celebrated—strength, wisdom, and creativity. But sometimes, it’s not just about the qualities a person has; it’s also about their circumstances and the challenges they’ve faced. For example, a young Felinor might stand out due to their lineage or perhaps a unique gift they possess.”

“Does that answer your question?” Nessa asked, her tone encouraging. I opened my mouth to ask another, my curiosity bubbling up again, but as I met Rael’s gaze, a wave of apprehension washed over me. I couldn’t shake the feeling that crossing him would be unwise, especially given the tensions from the night before.

I decided against pursuing the topic further. Better to keep the peace for now. With my thoughts shifting away from the young Felinor, I remained silent, my eyes darting around the table, searching for anything to distract myself.

When I hesitated and no one else at the table spoke up, Nessa cleared her throat and began, “Very well. Let’s move on to assigning mentors.”

As I sat at the table, my thoughts drifted back to the young white-haired Felinor. I couldn’t shake the image of her frightened eyes and the way she clung to the edges of the room, as if seeking refuge from the chaos around her. What had happened to her? I wanted to know more but felt helpless, like I was reaching for a dream that would slip through my fingers.

Then, the thought of Myra crept into my mind. Would she be proud of me? I was thrust into this noble role without warning, and I felt unprepared to navigate the complexities of my new life. I glanced down at my kimono, its luxurious fabric a stark reminder of the expectations placed upon me.

“Lady Murasakikiba,” Nessa’s voice cut through my thoughts. “I will be mentoring you directly since you are the youngest of the new nobles.”

The words hung in the air, and I was taken aback. My attendants smiled broadly at the announcement; their approval clear. I turned to Rael, whose gaze bore into me with a mixture of intensity and challenge. My mind reeled, caught between surprise and the weight of expectation that came with Nessa's decision.

As the announcement settled, everyone began to rise from the table, murmurs of excitement filling the air. The other new nobles gathered around their assigned mentors, eager to start their lessons. Nessa and I remained at the table, sitting on opposite sides. A nervous flutter churned in my stomach as I watched the others leave.

“Lady Murasakikiba,” Nessa said, her voice calm but firm, “your attendants are dismissed for now, as is Lord Rael.”

I felt my heart race at the command. My attendants looked at me, their expressions a mix of support and concern. Rael inclined his head, a brief nod that felt both formal and dismissive, before he turned and walked away, leaving just Nessa and me in the spacious room.

Once we were alone, Nessa leaned forward slightly, her expression shifting to one of seriousness. “For now, we can drop the formalities. We’ll cover them later, but right now, I need to have a quick talk with you.”

My heart sank. What could she possibly want to discuss? My mind raced with possibilities, each more unsettling than the last.

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