Yes, this is another flashback chapter amidst the present!!
And I know people just want to get on with the present, but--
But!
In my defense, this is the last flashback chapter split in the book! No more flashback chapters! >w< Also, this one is... tragic, as you can probably imagine from the title alone, so...
This is making me so sad. The flashbacks had begun in this book because I grew very scared that everyone would hate Abihiko if we only knew him from the present, unlike Neko who knew him enough to see what kind of person he was. (Both the good and bad Abihiko had always exposed). So the beginning of the flashbacks was a slow and steady rise to when he and Neko were happiest in their youth and where their relationship had blossomed. But yeah, I kinda forgot that Neko's flashbacks eventually end up with Chapter 1 of this story.
Which, as you all know... isn't a happy chapter. In fact, it is vicious and the single most horrible event in Neko's life. And so is everything that led to it. Thus, most late flashback chapters are sad and sometimes even cruel.
Sorry TT____TT.
But now, this is going to be over, and though Neko's life in the present isn't that great either, at least there is nowhere to go but up ^^. Also, now that the flashbacks are going to be over, the next stretch of present chapters are the last ones in Arc II, and Arc III that comes after it -- is essentially just the final Arc in the book (to mirror the beginning Arc I that preceded Neko finally meeting Abihiko in the present). In other words, the closing stages of the story!
So excited about that ^^.
Chapter Hundred Forty-Four
His Name Was Suminoe
Part 1 of 3
It was the last year of Nekohiko's Izumo studies. The Sixth year. And he didn't even get to go to Izumo or to spend his days Wayfaring and earning his experience in handling the misbehaving Spirits...
His days were spent arguing and handling the misbehaving humans. And gods, how much he hated that latter part.
He and humans just weren't meant to be. He only liked a couple of humans in his entire lifetime, and only one of them was allowed to see him daily.
And, alas, this person was not Abihiko.
Abihiko was the one human in the world Nekohiko enjoyed the most and wanted to be with. But Abihiko's presence caused too much tension between Nekohiko and the Great Lords, so...
...yeah.
Off he went. To placate the Lords and to make them feel as though Nekohiko didn't have favorites among them, Suminoe had arranged it so that Nekohiko and Abihiko weren't around each other.
At all.
And as such, Nekohiko's days dragged, and his melancholy displeasure with his life only deepened. Summer ended, and the heat went down. With it, the colors of the world were fading. And so was Nekohiko's joy and eagerness.
This year sucked.
Everything did, lately. The camp tents were always a bit too cold and hollow. The people around him -- both too apathetic in his opinion, and too eager for all the things he didn't care for, like war and gossip and endless debauchery of the military lifestyle in between the battles. The food was a tad too insipid. The bedding -- too hard and cold. He was constantly on edge and wanted to snap at those around him. Only with inhuman will did he keep himself away from such drastic actions.
But at night, he felt like crying and had nothing to restrain himself with.
Curled up in his woolen blankets, he balled himself for warmth and thought about all those nights, years ago, when he had only begun sleeping alone in the Izumo girl dorm -- without his nurse Saho he'd been so used to. And how miserable it had made him feel, to be so alone after being so used to someone else's tenderness and security.
Just like back then, he was like an abandoned child.
He yearned for warmth, in all senses of this word, and received none. Even his dreams were hollow and bleak.
That said, he was never truly alone now. Each of the Great Lords had issued their Imperial bodyguard to keep an eye on him at all times. But even with these five new people in Nekohiko's life infringing on his daily routines, on his dreadful nights and his lonely, empty mornings -- he still felt utterly alone.
Only Suminoe dispelled the feeling somewhat.
But even he was more of a curse than a blessing. Because... Suminoe.
He and Nekohiko hadn't made peace after their falling out yet. Perhaps, they never would. But he was here, and in the mass of people Nekohiko hardly knew, he was a welcome face.
Like family.
And judging by how often Abihiko talked dismissively about his family members, and so did many others -- Nekohiko wondered if it was fine that he and Suminoe weren't friends. Being part of a family didn't imply friendliness.
It only implied being together regardless of all the disagreements and dislikes.
Tonight was especially lonesome.
The sky was overcast, and the first chilly winds of autumn swept the landscape, giving the military camp of the Hira army an even less inviting mood than usual. Unlike Kazuragi's camps which were brimming with agitated activity, Hiras were noticeably less enthused. Their temporary tents made of stone and karst rocks wafted of impersonal environment without warmth or lived-in coziness. Inside, Nekohiko always felt as though in a cave. The Hira fires and lava fountains that lit up their surroundings cast a hideous, warlike glow -- and made him remember all too vividly why he was here. And why he was stranded here all the time, waiting for the war to finally kick in its last stages.
His personal "tent" was enormous today, and the light from the lava fountain in its middle didn't even reach the ceiling, so tall it was. Okinaga's Imperial bodyguard, Daichi had made for Nekohiko his own "room" within this tent -- and had put there a few glowing fireflies of magma hues. They danced in the air, lighting the room up with a bit less of the menacing air compared to the usual Hira lanterns, and Nekohiko was grateful. But he could not sit in that room alone.
He was too pained to go there yet.
He sat before the lava fountain in the main "room" of the tent, amidst the five bodyguards that followed him everywhere he went. He didn't exactly like these people, but they were always there for him. They took care of his needs, and he... let them.
Tonight, he wanted any kind of human connection, so he chose to sit here with them.
For the last time in hell knew how long.
Tomorrow, he was going to meet up with Lady Takarashi of House Hisome. As planned, she would unleash his Hisome seal -- and then, she would finally join his army against the Usurper.
Four Great Lords against one Usurper on the Throne.
No need for war any longer. Nekohiko would win simply because the fight would not be able to go on. Right?
That said, the unleashing of the seal would force him to go into a vegetative state for months. And...
Gods, he did not know how he would take it, this time. The previous seal -- the Towa one -- had been unlocked when he had been with Abihiko. He had been miserable during it, yes, but also... not. Abihiko had made it all better just by being close.
This time, however...
Nekohiko trailed his gaze over the gathering of the Imperial bodyguards around the lava fountain in the center of the cold, cavernous "tent".
"The food for Your Royal Majesty," the Utsuro bodyguard, Chinatsu, told him. She held up for him a bowl of steaming broth with charred mushrooms and noodles piled on with overcooked vegetables in the center.
Her cooking, as always, was lacking. But not for the absence of enthusiasm.
At least it was hot and sating.
"Thank you," Nekohiko said miserably, and accepted the bowl.
"You are skin and bones and it pains me to look at you, Young Prince," Chinatsu drawled, giving Nekohiko a distasteful up-and-down glance. "A man should not look like you do. You look like a chick."
Nekohiko blinked into the fire, unsure of what he had to do with this information.
"I mean, I get it that you were parading as one since your birth," the woman went on with her unhooked tongue. She shook up her gourd bottle of something potent and took a quick sip. Instantly, her cheeks assumed a rosy tint and her eyes glittered. "Kyaaaa! My boy, we will make a man out of you. Then let them anyone dare say that you bottom for that boyfriend of yours. Ha-ha!"
"..."
"Chinatsu." Daichi frowned, appalled. "What are you doing. This is inappropriate."
Nekohiko didn't even get what was inappropriate about it, but he trusted Daichi's judgment. The man knew things.
If only because he was so personally attached to Abihiko, and of course would not want to hear any slander against his young master -- even if it might be earned.
"We're like a tight family by now." Chinatsu elbowed Nekohiko in the side, nearly spilling the hot broth onto him. "Right? Right?? No secrets and no fake modesty among family members. Young Prince gets it. He's probably tired of being the 'girl' in his relationship anyway. He's the Emperor. Dominance is in his blood. Your fancy young master Abi better look out, ha-ha!"
We are family? Nekohiko wondered, unsure. How so?
...They were traveling together, yes. But all these bodyguards treated him no better than they would a child. Daichi babysat him with his patronizing yet removed care because the man was never that comfortable next to Nekohiko. Chinatsu and Hibiki straight-up insulted him. The two never really bothered to find out what his preferences or tastes were, so they just pushed over him without a single question of what he wanted.
And Etsuko and Arata were... too busy with their endless military papers and reports they read and wrote to their respective Lords. They hardly even looked at Nekohiko, let alone spoke to him.
Apparently, his opinion did not factor in any of the military issues they were writing or planning. It was as though he was invisible to them. A token they had been given to drag along with them on their battle marches across the plains of Hira and the marshes of Hisome.
But not a person. Not anyone they respected or even liked.
"He's still young, and you are talking to him as though he is an adult," Daichi groused, digging his spoon into his own bowl of broth. "Stop corrupting the youth."
"He's fifteen! Time to grow up," Chinatsu chortled. Then winked at Nekohiko most suggestively. "And time to man up. Look at those frail shoulders of yours. What girl -- or a swell guy like your Abihiko would even look at you? Are you a noodle, Young Prince? Or are you a man? Eat and get thicker, stronger, then you'll be worth the trouble."
...
A piece of pork lodged in Nekohiko's throat, so tense he became. With pain, he swallowed it, chasing down by more broth.
"He would have to fix much more than just his body mass," the annoyingly-raspy young voice chimed in. Hibiki was even younger than Nekohiko.
A mere child of thirteen. Yet he carried himself with so much clout that Nekohiko sometimes had to remind himself Hibiki was smaller and weaker than himself.
It was just that... unlike Nekohiko, who was uncomfortable with other people around him -- especially adults like most of his bodyguards -- Hibiki did not give a damn.
Adult, child, animal, furniture. He treated everyone the same. Like crap.
"Look at him. Sallow, with dark circles under his eyes. His cheeks are hollow, and his hair is lacking shine and so disheveled." Hibiki smiled into his bowl, picking a particularly big piece of mushroom with his spoon and lifting it to light. "He needs makeup to even look decent."
"Makeup? Nooooo. He's already too feminine -- are you insane?"
Hibiki's eyes flashed as he gave Chinatsu a cold-blooded stare he was so good at.
"I am not insane," he gritted through teeth. Then he carried the mushroom in his spoon over to one of his rag dolls he liked to carry around and imitated a feeding session with the dolly. "You're all insane," he added lower.
"Suuuure," Chinatsu said. The look she gave to Nekohiko and Daichi was worth a thousand words. Not that anyone else would disagree with her.
And yet, as Hibiki brought the spoon over to his doll, it did open its rickety mouth. And it did accept the feeding like a child would.
And the way its eyes blinked at Hibiki lovingly and blindly -- only made the scene so much more frustrating to witness.
Perhaps Hibiki was right. An insane person would not be able to do things like that. To craft dummy dolls who would act so much like a live creature. For all intents and purposes, this young boy was actually very good at what he was doing. It just looked creepy as hell and killed everyone's mood for more talking.
Honestly? Thank heavens.
Nekohiko was often the target of everyone's ridicule, so he welcomed a quiet dinner instead. Once he was done with his bowl, he thanked Chinatsu again, regardless of how tasteless he had found it.
The other bodyguards weren't as pleasant.
Arata and Etsuko had their usual military disregard for anything and wolfed down the meal as though it didn't matter to them what was in it. They didn't even distinguish between the parts of the meal, and slurped up everything in their path like the busy generals they were.
Then, without so much as saying thanks or acknowledging Chinatsu's efforts, they were off. Within moments, they had eaten and had to leave and do their no-doubt important military businesses with the other generals. Hibiki ugh-ed throughout the meal, throwing dirty looks at Chinatsu and being bratty about the food he had to feed his dolls with.
He did care more about his dolls than himself, because he had not minded eating the meal nearly as much. The only truly nice person among the bunch was Daichi.
He reminisced about the same meals he had tasted across the Empire. In each big city -- what differences and varieties of the same meal there were.
Peaceful1Nagano (長野市, "Peaceful Town" -- a city in Chuubu region, so around the Nagare Lordship), Estuary Gate2Edo, the previous name of Tokyo, (江戸, "Estuary Gate") -- located in Kanto region of Japan, i.e. in Towa Lordship, Nagare, Broad Island, 3Hiroshima (広島市, "Wide Island") -- city in Chuugoku region of Japan, i.e. around Hisome Lordship in this story , Adamantine Mountain4Munt Kongo (金剛山, "Adamantine Mountain" -- a mountain beside Osaka in modern Japan)...
The man had traveled a lot in his life, and unlike Arata and Etsuko, who had to travel for battle marches, he did travel out of pure enjoyment for the Empire's lands. Just like Nekohiko and Abihiko. He even treated his travels as little souvenirs of the past he could fish out of his memory and cherish. Especially on a cold and sad night as this one.
"When Young Master Abihiko was little, he liked the noodle broth in Heaven's Door5Kobe (神戸市, "God's Door") -- a city in Kansai region, so by association -- a city in Hira Lordship ^^ the most. There was this small noodle shop in the eastern part of the town, and every time we went there, he would beg me to take him there and order him a bowl and a melon pastry afterward... Hah, that one time when his bowl was too cold, and he had to reheat it just in his hands with his Hira magic. The way the restaurant owners looked at him when the bowl exploded all around the room because he didn't have good control of his powers yet, ha-ha-ha!"
...
Nekohiko's heart had never felt heavier, all of a sudden.
He put down his empty bowl, aching all through.
"How is Abihiko doing?" he asked. "Have you received any messages from him recently?"
...
Not only was Nekohiko prohibited from hanging out with Abihiko to not aggravate all the Lords with their relationship. But it was also frowned upon if he even wrote letters to him. Because the Great Lords asked to check in on his correspondence and what was in it, and Nekohiko did not want to worsen his relationships with some of them.
Everything put them in a passive-aggressive mode. Every little thing about him.
As though they were constantly looking for a chance to blame him for favoriting one Lord over the other -- and jumped on him from even the slightest of suspicions.
He was dying to know about Abihiko.
He missed him so much, it caused him real, gnawing ache in his chest to even think of the last times he had seen him.
Right after Asazuma's death and burial.
Abihiko had been deadened in his silence and did not respond to any attempts to talk or commiserate with him. Whenever Nekohiko had tried to tell him he understood what he was feeling, Abihiko could only answer with:
"You do not. You never knew your mother. What can you understand? Stop lying."
That... hurt. But Nekohiko knew Abihiko was lashing out, even with how quiet and indifferent he looked. He wanted to let Abihiko steam it all out and move past it. But then...
They had to split apart, and Abihiko had accepted the arrangement a little bit too eagerly.
As though he had wanted to separate from Nekohiko for a long while now and welcomed this change.
Why?
Was Abihiko... mad at him? Nekohiko wondered. Deep inside, he felt that was the case and that Abihiko blamed Nekohiko for everything that had gone wrong with this stupid war and the stupid Lords, and the utter destruction and misery of the Abi family.
They had been too close to Nekohiko, true.
They had paid for that.
He hardly had seen them, and only was close to Abihiko -- somehow, that had been enough to punish them for even knowing him a little.
This was too cruel to fathom. Feeling so guilty about something he had no control over. Just his existence. Just him being friends with Abihiko -- was making him guilty.
He did not know how to address this, and he didn't know how to talk to Abihiko about it. Thus, perhaps it was for the better that the two of them were away from each other.
But it didn't lift Nekohiko's moods to know this was for the better.
He still felt the shittiest he had ever done in his life.
He still wanted to cry at even the thought of Abihiko.
"Is he doing well?" Nekohiko asked Daichi again, in a small voice. He was afraid to summon the unwanted attention of the other bodyguards and then them sneaking this information to their Lords. Because -- truly, he did not doubt that each of these bodyguards was far more loyal to their respective Lords than to him.
They weren't just bodyguards, all right?
They were spies.
He had no false assumptions about that. He wasn't stupid.
"Abihiko's wellbeing is important to Lord Hira Okinaga," Nekohiko added as though to mask his own interest. "And Lord Okinaga is one of my trusted allies. I hope everything is well in their household."
Daichi nodded profoundly, but then shrugged. "I haven't received any messages from him. Sorry. But rest assured. He is with Okinaga. Nothing bad will ever happen to Young Master when he is with him. Abihiko is as though behind a stone wall. Safe and sound. Safe and sound."
...
A taste of tears wafted so clearly on Nekohiko's tongue. "Mn. That's... good."
His last dinner before tomorrow's released seal was over. And he had gained nothing from it other than vague insults and awkward silences.
How wonderful.
He watched the guards as they rose back to their feet to carry out their vigil duties. Daichi would guard the inside of the small room of Nekohiko's, Chinatsu had to stand guard at the doors of the tent while Hibiki would remain inside, minding any small chores Nekohiko might want to ask him. Nekohiko never would, but such were the rules of his existence with these bodyguards. Later, Chinatsu and Daichi would change with Etsuko and Arata, and the endless schedule of bodyguards taking care of him would never end.
...
It wouldn't even be that different after he lifted the Hisome seal. A routine. A drudge.
Silent, he followed with his gaze all the three bodyguards as they put on their faceless helmets and straightened their Emerald-green cloaks over their shoulders before they went back to their duties. Then, with a depressed sigh, Nekohiko rose to his feet as well.
"Good night, then," he told his guards.
It wasn't just a mere good night. With how unresponsive and comatose he would be in the coming weeks and months... this was quite frankly, a farewell.
Perhaps not a farewell to them, but to himself.
The few loneliest months on earth were coming for him. At least time would speed up while he was in his Spiritual coma, adjusting to his newest seal. Being unconscious and a wooden log was sometimes... such a blessing, no?
With that, he went into his room and started preparing for bed. His hands did their thing while his mind was far away -- in warmer times and with warmer people.
Or not even people. Just one person.
But one person warm enough that he could fill Nekohiko's entire life with heat and passion and joy. Nobody else necessary.
...
"His Holiness Suminoe!" Chinatsu announced from over the entrance into their tent, and Nekohiko sank to his bedding.
Daichi had promised to get someone special to Nekohiko a few minutes ago -- and he did. Time for one last farewell Nekohiko had to give before tomorrow.
Hopefully, this one would go much better than the previous ones. Suminoe would neither insult Nekohiko, nor cause him pain by talking about Abihiko too much.
Perfect, for Nekohiko's needs.
"Let him in," he told the doors and waited patiently as the two tall figures -- the Imperial Bodyguard Daichi and the Head Priest Suminoe -- entered his room.
But contrary to all Nekohiko's hopes, the first thing Suminoe said the moment he stepped into the room and let Daichi close the stone door behind them, was --
"I need to talk to you about Abihiko. It is urgent."
Thus shattering even the remnants of self-control that Nekohiko had.
...
Why, why, Suminoe?
Do not you know it hurts already?
***
"Why? What's wrong?"
Nekohiko's mind went blank with worry. Did anything bad happen to Abihiko? Why would Suminoe -- of all people -- speak about him now?
Nekohiko didn't pay attention to Daichi stilling at the doors of the room. All his concentration went to Suminoe who slowly strode into the room, studying it in his usual reserved manner.
"No windows," Suminoe noted with displeasure. "Once you unleash your Hisome seal, you will be spending all your time in the places like this? Like in a prison cell?"
What would it even matter?
Am I not in a prison cell already? All these Lords piling their wishes and wants on me.
All these bodyguards.
"I will be in the vegetative state anyway, so I don't think it would matter to me where I am," Nekohiko replied carefully.
"Is that how you think of the Spiritual enlightenment that will descend on you? Vegetative state?"
A subtle trace of a smile gave Suminoe's usually-cold face a warmer tint.
"It is not a coma if that's how you perceive it. Do you find it that objectionable to be Spiritually-attuned and communicate with Spirits, Nekohiko? Really?"
Well... Nekohiko didn't mind those periods when his mind was being overcome with Spirits. It was always so calming and detaching. It was almost like sleepwalking. A higher state of existence, far from mortal worries.
But the mortal worries were important to him, too.
During his last attempts to open his seals, he had also chaffed at the idea of not being able to talk or to spend his time with Abihiko the way they had always done. No hugging, no fighting, no reading together. No kissing... no other things, too.
That was what he missed most. Plus, how hard it must have been, for Abihiko to watch him in such an unresponsive, apathetic state?
Most people wouldn't be able to handle that for months at a time. Of course Nekohiko hated being a burden like that. Thus, he disliked opening new seals if they implied something like this happening to him -- and to Abihiko.
But only because of that.
If it weren't for Abihiko, Nekohiko would never notice the difference. Maybe it was better that this time, Abihiko wasn't beside him while Nekohiko was adapting to the Hisome powers opening.
Distraught, Nekohiko joined Suminoe by the stone wall of the room. The way Suminoe stood there, watching the wall as though he was looking through a window that didn't exist, gave Nekohiko an odd feeling of being alone with him in his office in Izumo.
With the camellia branches swaying just outside the window. So serene. So placid...
But little did he know, Suminoe was perceiving a window in that wall. He turned to Nekohiko and gave him an almost-mischievous look. "There is a small azalea shrub outside this wall. Did you know? The mountain breeze ruffles through the petals. It is so peaceful... I wonder if I may make you a window in this tent to let you look at something beautiful during your adjustment period tomorrow. May I?"
...
"Why?"
Suminoe shrugged. "Nekohiko, what you experience during these periods -- is not a coma or a vegetative state. It is much more like living in the Spiritside for an extended time. Just that only you are there, and nobody else is. At first, I will admit -- I was scared every time you opened a new seal of yours. The previous Emperors have become unruly and... savage, during times like this. It is part of the reason why people are so wary of the new Emperor opening his Binding seals one after the other. There is always a high chance his mind will simply not be able to handle it."
One word out of this statement jumped at Nekohiko.
"Savage...?"
"Yes. Just like the Spirits who become mad and overcome with high emotion across the land." Suminoe seemed proud that Nekohiko was drawn to this comparison. "The Emperors are born with too much power, and thus, they are quite like the Spirits. They can grow Corrupted by their own power, and it is very common, alas. But oddly enough... not with you.
"I do not know if it was your upbringing far away from people. Or that you were humbled by not having any powers at all before your puberty. Or that you have never been raised in the atmosphere of luxury or excess or fawning. But Nekohiko... every single time I have taught you about how selfish people are, especially people with immense power -- I warned you about how their own selfish impulses always Corrupt them and bring them down.
"And I do not know whether you listened and learned so well from me. I doubt that I am that good of a mentor. But -- perhaps, the combination of all those things about your upbringing, and your loneliness, and your lack of common desires and urges... it makes you special, Nekohiko.
"It makes you the closest thing there might be to a... truly selfless person. One that might be able to not lose control of your powers even if you have access to all of them."
Nekohiko stood beside him silent and afraid to breathe. The way Suminoe spoke about him... Was this praise?
Was this pride in how Nekohiko had grown up and who he had become?
That... didn't feel right.
Nekohiko grew uncomfortable and averted his eyes. "You should not say things like that. I am... an awfully selfish person."
You just have no idea.
I want... my Empire. I want...
Wait.
What did he want out of life, really? He had always known he wanted his Throne back, but what for? He needed to rule to save his Empire and its people and Spirits -- but he didn't like the idea of ruling, and he didn't feel the need to dominate others. Even in the war, his input had been minimal so far.
He wanted to have time to himself, and to study about lawmaking, and agriculture, and sanitation of the big cities and towns. Simply to learn how to help his land be healthier and better.
But these were such unimportant things to most people in the world that perhaps... that did make his interests very niche. Did others think that made him special? How funny.
"Is there anything you want for yourself? Something that power can give you?" Suminoe asked him, quiet. "Most people want power to abuse it for their own gain. Do you?"
"I... don't know. I haven't tried, yet."
"It would be easy to predict as long as we know what you want. From life. The Throne and your Empire you always tried to claim -- are the power. But what do you need them for, personally?"
...
I... don't know.
"I want to bring peace to the Spirits and people--"
"That is not a personal want, Nekohiko. I asked you -- what do you want for yourself?"
...
"I just want..." Nekohiko dithered, unable to voice it out without seeming shallow and pathetic and weak. But was it truly that weak?
He wanted warmth, and the only person in the world who could give it. If that person wanted to give this warmth to him, in the first place. Which he didn't. At least not at the current moment.
Nekohiko would not dare demand it, of course. It was just something he wanted. Almost a whim.
"I want Abihiko to be with me," he said at last, forlorn.
Suminoe's eyes flicked to him with amusement. "Here? Now? Or overall -- in your life?"
"I don't know. I just miss him. I want to see him... if just one last time before the Hisome seal opens and I won't be able to see him for months. That's all. Is it not selfish, to want that?"
Suminoe gave it profound thinking as he and Nekohiko descended into silence, staring at the window that did not exist. They must be quite a funny sight to anyone who wasn't Spirit-attuned, huh.
"Would you ever use your powers to achieve that? Would you force Abihiko to be with you? Would you punish anyone who stands between you and him? Merely wanting things and abusing your powers to get what you want are two different ways of life, Nekohiko."
...
Nekohiko once again retreated into confused muteness, pondering. Yet Suminoe treated this as victory already.
"See? You are selfless. You do not even want anything from the powers you are given. And that is why Spirits love you and why you will bring peace to the Empire. And why each of your new seals opening inside you is not a bad thing. Never. Spirits flow through you, not encountering a single impure obstacle in their path. Human desires, human base urges, human vices. That is what has Corrupted every single Emperor before you, and why I believe you never will be."
Nekohiko raised his eyes, feeling just a tad bit lighter. "Was this what you came here for? To say this? I am happy to hear it, but... I thought you wanted to talk to me about Abihiko."
At last, Suminoe's face went back to its general cool demeanor. He turned aside. "I did. That I believe in your ability to survive your seals opening doesn't mean I do not want to lighten your burden in any way possible. Look at this place. It's like a prison. That is not right. Nekohiko, you are going to be enlightened with the new powers given to you by the Spirits -- yet you hide yourself here as though you are burying yourself under the ground."
With one single swoosh of his hand, he cast the area of transparency over the wall's hard stone. Little by little, the surface of the stone receded, growing paler and fainter until it turned into a watery shimmer beyond which...
...a beautiful nightly scenery of a mountain slope limned.
Like a tiny window into the outside. And with it, came the fresh mountain breeze with the fragrance of the rare flowers and herbs.
The wind was so real, it even caressed Nekohiko's hair, drawing a shy smile out of him. His little hidden room now had a window, with a piece of the brilliant nightly sky outside.
So sweet.
"Do not fret. It is not transparent from the outside. Nobody will see you two here," Suminoe told him, content.
"..."
Nekohiko froze over, his ears perking at the mention of "two". What did Suminoe mean?
But Suminoe was going on as though this was the most obvious thing in the world.
"Now, this is more livable. At least, your stay in the tents like this after the Hisome seal -- won't be as unpleasant as you made it to be at first. Nekohiko? Your seals opening is a blessing. Not a threat, and not a tragedy. Not a farewell to the world. Abihiko and I will make sure of that."
"Abihiko is far away and won't make it here before Lady Takarashi opens my seal tomorrow--" Nekohiko began.
But as Suminoe turned away from the window and gave Daichi at the doors a subtle nod, Nekohiko realized that he'd been tricked.
Tricked quite badly.
Because as Nekohiko turned to the doors as well, he saw--
--Daichi rushing at him in what looked like an attacking maneuver. Nekohiko half-wanted to dodge him and tackle him down instead. But the shock of something so bizarre stopped him, and Nekohiko balked, unsure what to do.
Daichi -- attacking him and Suminoe letting this happen?
Why--
Then Daichi's arms crushed Nekohiko to himself, and the hottest breath in the world touched Nekohiko's face as Daichi's face neared, closing in to Nekohiko's stunned one.
"What do you think you're doing--" Nekohiko started to say.
Yet couldn't. The last thought that flickered in his mind before Daichi's lips engulfed his own was--
Why the hell is Daichi much taller than usual?
And why did he smell like sea breeze and apples and--
Nekohiko's eyes closed in delirious joy as recognition lit up inside him. These lips, this taste... this passion within the kiss...
Abihiko.
When had Daichi given him his uniform to wear and sneak in here unnoticed? When had Suminoe planned to bring Abihiko here like some kind of a contraband boyfriend that needed to be smuggled under everyone's noses?
Above all -- when had Abihiko arrived and why was he kissing Nekohiko like this?
Was Abihiko no longer mad with grief and blaming Nekohiko for his family's tragedies?
All these thoughts swerved in Nekohiko's head, but his body reacted quite differently. His heart fluttered and his breath hastened, elated. Even his blood rushed faster as though already warming up after such a long period of cold and loneliness.
"I missed you too," Abihiko told him after he finally grew tired of bruising Nekohiko's lips with his aggressive kisses.
Which made Nekohiko realize.
"You heard everything I said to His Holiness!" he gasped, exasperated. "You listened to our private conversation! You inappropriate--"
Oh wait, a harsher thought came to him the very next moment.
Was Suminoe watching them make out all this while?
Oh Spirits.
Oh no. Nekohiko gave the room a hasty scan -- but the place was empty. Only probably because Suminoe had to flee in haste as soon as Abihiko jumped onto Nekohiko with his slobbery attack!
"Ahhhhh, he saw us going at it!" Nekohiko breathed out, clasping his hands over his mouth as though to take back all the kisses he had taken and given just now.
But too late.
Nothing could wash away this shame from him now.
Yet Abihiko did not give him a chance to wonder where Suminoe went and if the Head Priest wasn't too traumatized by the displays of unbearable affections between the two of them. Abihiko was already pulling him back in, giddy as a puppy with his favorite toy.
After their passionate first smooched, most of the pale powder that had covered Abihiko's lips to disguise, had been rubbed off. The beautiful red of his lips peeked, finally granting Nekohiko everything he had ever wanted to see.
His best friend. In his arms.
"I did hear everything," he told Nekohiko, coy. "Apart from you two staring at the wall for half an hour, that was the highlight of your entire boring conversation for me. That you want me. Out of everyone and everything in the world, you want me. Just me. Even when half the Empire tells you no."
...
Nekohiko scowled, finding Abihiko's smugness objectionable. "If you look any more puffed out from knowing this, you might explode," he told him.
Abihiko still couldn't let this go. "My, my. What a selfish little Emperor you are. Daring to want me as if I'm your property. As if I'm made solely for your enjoyment. Tch."
"And yet, you indulge me."
Abihiko lifted his arms to take his faceless visor helmet off -- exposing his face, flushed with joy and eagerness -- to Nekohiko.
This, and not even the window into the wide open world -- was what made Nekohiko feel finally released from the prison he had been in for the past few weeks. Seeing Abihiko. Here. Now.
Abihiko laughed, both menacing and somehow alluring. The best sound in the world.
"Who said I am indulging you selflessly, myself?"
