The sun is on my face, and the wind is in my hair.

Freshly scrubbed and squeezed, I am in full sage mode.  Even Buddha would say “damn son, that’s inner peace” if he saw me right now.

Walking up from the gorge, Lili splits off as we reach the footbridge.  Going back to Lions Keep with her entourage in tow to run Barton Inc while Frankie and Red follow me to Stormgarde.

Mila is also following me.

May have wiggled her way into escort duty?  But panther girl’s paying for it.  Like being pussy blocked from joining scrub a dub time earlier.

Stepping up into Stormgarde, I can feel the ocean breeze again.  Been here for a month and a half but still not entirely used to that salt water smell that just seems to make everything taste better.  The sun is high enough to peak over Lions Keep’s walls.

Hmm…  So nice.

Fifties?  Sixties maybe?  Spring is almost over.  Trees are full of leaves.  Flowers in bloom.  Grass is green.  Have the urge to yell at my kids.  “Go mow!”

World almost looks like one of those air freshener ads.  Or drug ads.  Yeah, not sure why those commercials often look alike, but they do.

Sigh.

Almost makes me want to cancel Murder Spree 2.0.  Nah…  I’ll run out of murderees sooner or later.  Probably.  Should just let nature take its course.  Like Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom, of Murderball.

Well, I will at least put it on hold during class.  Also probably.

Hard to read when you keep having to wipe blood off the pages.

Turn my warmed face back to Stormgarde and finish climbing the steps up from the footbridge.

Everytime I see this place I’m reminded of Sayo.  The isekaied japanese high school girl who is remembered as Saint Sanriel.  She spent most of her life here.  And her influence seeped into the very bricks.

Unable to return home.  She sought to turn Stormgarde into the college of her dreams.  God damn impressive that her plans and drawings have been followed ever since.

For centuries.

Still very much a work in progress.  Generations of staff working to recreate a modern school of higher learning in this shitty medieval fantasy world.

They really have come far.

A good example is the school uniform I’m wearing.  An interesting fantasy modern getup.

I’m wearing a black, long sleeved, buttoned jacket that reaches a bit below the belt.  Under it is a white, long sleeve, buttoned shirt.  And around the shirt’s collar is a green tie.

Wanted to wear red but the harem wouldn’t let me.  Supposed to wear my house’s color.

Well, thbbpt!

On top of the jacket is a half-cape over my left shoulder that doesn’t quite reach the elbow.  The half-cape is colored.  Which shows what House or nation you belong too.  Mine is checkered black and green with a gold lion rampant sewn on top of it.

For girls the skirt is colored.  They don’t have half-capes.

Figure my colors should be black and red though.  Isn’t that how the isekai antihero is supposed to look?

Below the jacket and shirt is a nice pair of pants.  Yep, actual pants.  No zippers though so my fly is buttoned.  At least I don’t have to worry about getting my nuts stuck in a zipper.

Though getting my nuts stuck in buttons after seeing my prom date’s mom’s tits would probably hurt like hell too.

We got a bleeder!

…

Ahem.

Well, under the pants are boxers and socks.  Yep, actual socks.  Cotton, Wool, and Silk are available in this world though Silk is far more expensive.

By the by, cotton is a huge cash crop for aquecia.  They export it all over the place.  And aquecian plantations?  Yeah, lots and lots of slaves.  Silk comes mostly from the west, overseas.  Some oriental style empire apparently.

All these uniforms?  Yeah, lots of tailors and sewing in Pearlden.

For me that means the shirt, tie, boxers, and socks?  Are silk.  The rest?  Cotton.  In the colder months the cotton pieces are replaced with wool.

For the really rich shits, everything is silk.  So you can kind of tell how wealthy a student is just by looking at what their uniform is made of.

Well that and how good the sewing and tailoring is.  Yep.  Another dividing line between the various cliques.

Sigh.

Still fucking hate school.

Maybe if I just murder some, a little, no one will noti-

“Please master.  It is difficult to form alliances with corpses.”

Busted by the wives [See thru Husband’s Antics] cheat, again.

Dammit.

“If my lord desires, let this one be your wrath.”

Panther girl is acting brave.  I saw that eye roll, Red.  But not having a roof over her head is taking some getting used to.  She keeps trying to not look, well, up.

The opposite of “don’t look down.”

And definitely not Red’s favorite person.

“Miyula.”  Sounding a bit hostile there honey.  “Husband is here to grow.  The alliances and connections he can form here may last a lifetime.”  Mila getting womansplained.  “The magic he can learn here will make him stronger.”

A glance behind shows me what Mila’s resting bitch face looks like, as my knight-wife continues.

“We have too many enemies and will gather more.  Stormgarde is a chance to gather allies.  We must not waste it.”

Look at that, my naive knightie is all grown up and saving China!

Sniff.

I’m so proud.

…

Will still murder any kid who gives me shit though.  I mean, may.  Yeah.  At least stab them.  A bit.

“Master?”

Fine.

Whatever.

Uh, where was I?  Right, uniform, belt!  Got a black leather belt too.  And black leather shoes.  Buckled shoes that I’m not quite used to.  Still prefer my boots with the hooks and string.  Much more comfortable.

We’re walking down the main east-west bricked pathway towards Kashiwa Hall.

Stormgarde covers the western three quarters of the leveled top of this ridge.  And it is divided into six sections.

The northeastern section, everything north of the pathway I’m on, is the men’s dorms.  That includes its own cafeteria and baths.

The southeastern section, everything south of the pathway I’m on, is the women’s dorms.  Also with their own cafeteria and baths.

Ahead of me, in the center of Stormgarde, is the huge Kashiwa Hall.  A building stretching north-south with a dome in the middle.  Where most of the classrooms are.  On its northend is the auditorium.  The southend is the astronomer’s tower slash library.

West of Kashiwa Hall, mounted traffic is allowed.  So this east-west walkway’s mirror is a road instead.

On the northside is the gate beginning the switchback road plummeting down into Pearlden.  The rest of the northwestern part is filled with stores, cafes, a stable, post office, teacher housing, and the Delta Tau Chi brat house.

There is even a railed trolley platform thing in the northwestern corner that drops down to the docks and hauls freight and passengers.

The southwestern side is the “outdoor” stuff.  Mini-coliseum, gymnasium, baths, training fields, etc…

Lastly, at the western end of Stormgarde, is the Church of Saint Sanriel and a lighthouse.  The church allows the worship of various gods there but is mostly focused on, of course, Saint Sanriel.

The lighthouse, uh, lights stuff.

Paths and roads are paved with brown bricks.  Buildings, builts, use a deep red brick.  Roof colors vary.  Being yellow, blue, red, or green.  Lots of windows.  Yep, glass windows.

Statues and fountains are scattered about.  Hardly any shrubberies, sorry Knights Who Say Ni, some flowers but not tons.  Very open.  Lots of space around and in between buildings to have study circles and picnics.

Seriously, especially on the pedestrian eastern side.  It would be easy to think you are walking through the campus of an ivy league school.

And with only having one outer wall that’s mostly level with the flattened ridge top?  The view is oh my fucking god amazing.

Pretty peaceful now too.  We are high enough that the noise from the oversized village, Pearlden, on the north side is more like a whisper.  Birds can be clearly heard singing among the trees, statues, and fountains.

Of course that’s because its second period.  Rush hour, start of first period, is long over and most of the student population is in Kashiwa Hall, going to their next class.  See handfuls heading to or from the dorms.  That's where the mens and womens studies classes are.

Basically courtship and bridal training.

Like on the western side there should be handfuls heading towards, or coming back from, the gym and fields.  For the physical classes.  We are going to Kashiwa Hall for my class, “Adventum I.”

My ladies are done up in “civilian” versions of the student uniform.  Shirts and skirts.  Fantasy modern though with differences.  Red’s has armor mixed in like greeves, boobplate, etc…  With a “red” theme of course.

Frankie’s looks more priestessy.  Yes that’s a thing.  Little differences giving it a more holy look.  White robe-ish.

Mila, on the other hand, has more armor like Red’s but its a green theme and shows more skin.  Shorter shirt, shorter skirt.  That sort of thing.

All three are armed.  Mila with a two hander over her back.  Red with a sword on her hip.  And Frankie with a dagger and wand on her hips.

In fact, can see many students are armed.  With swords, daggers, and or wands.  Heavier stuff like axes and halberds are not permitted.

Myself?  I’ve got the super swords at my hips with crossed belts.  One red leather and the other blue.  I’m even resting my hands on them as we approach Kashiwa Hall.

We are getting lots of looks.  Like oodles.  But no one’s approaching.  In fact, they are even taking detours to avoid us.

Why?

Did I forget to put on deodorant this morning?

Should I sniff my pits to check?

Huh.  I’m only a necromancer who could kill them and harvest their remains to create unholy abominations.  Someone who has killed faculty and nobility, even a duke, on campus without a single ounce of retaliation.

Wouldn’t raising the dead be a great trick for parties?  Who wouldn’t want the moans and howls of the tormented undead singing backup at the local karaoke bar?

Kids these days.  So picky.

Oh well, not here to make friends.  And I’m all out of bubblegum.

Put my best “fuck you” smile on and walk through the double doors of Kashiwa Hall.

Oh, uh, what room?

“Room 32, Master.”

Ah, thank you Frankie.

The halls are full but rapidly thinning as the cutting it close folks run to their next class.  Some freeze when they see me.  But most are too distracted to notice.

Head up the stairs and make my way down the north hall.

Remember the first number is the room and the second number is the floor.

12…  22…  32.  Here, we, go.

Unlike Room 152, where the entrance was moved to the storage room.  This classroom still has two doorways.  One at each end.

Second floor classrooms are laid out in a labroom like design.  Instead of the raised stepped seating of the first floor rooms.  So the courses with more student interaction, like props and experiments, are held on the second floor.

Entire room goes silent as I enter.  [Super Senses] picked up chatter about me when I got close.  So I know they were gossiping.

Sigh.

See an open table next to the window in the last row, so make a beeline for it.  Again, the kids quickly clear the way.

Ooh…  Nice spot.  Window to look out of when I’m bored.  And in the last row so easier to take a nap when the teach rambles.

Only see fourteen students.  Most look like freshmen but a couple are sophomores.

Eh?

Oh, crap, forgot.  Boys get a lanyard looking thing for their half-capes.  Girls get a tassel looking thing for their skirts.  Freshmen don’t get one.

Adventum I is the “basics” of adventuring.  So the higher grades really should have passed Adventum I already.

And fourteen isn’t a bad number.  You’ve got less than five hundred students on campus with 30 to 40 classes going each period.  So student count should be ten to twenty per class.

Of course those are not the only ones here.

Stormgarde is open to nobles and commoners.  But there is an entrance exam and it is expensive as hell.  So if you can afford Stormgarde?  You can probably afford a servant or two.

Interestingly?  Most students don’t have them here.

As an institution of higher learning, this place wants to maintain a certain image.  Filthy, smelly, beaten, and starving, slaves cluttering up the campus?  Does not fit that image.  Not even if you keep them hidden in the dorms.

So the cheap slaves that many favor?  Are not welcome on campus.  If you can’t keep them properly attired and sufficiently healthy?  The school may seize them and kick your nasty ass out.

They’ve done it before.

And even if you can?  There are a lot of extra fees levied and hoops to jump through.  So, over half the students don’t bother.  If they are lazy they just slip some coin to a local to keep their clothes and rooms clean.

It's a lot cheaper.

Those locals can’t stay on campus overnight.  So they work while their employers are in class.

Back to the classroom, there are 14 students.  Plus seven servants.  Five with one servant each and one with two.

Now you gotta be rich to afford one servant here.  Two?  Only the richie rich and lord high muckety mucks can afford those extra charges.

Huh?  Three?  Me?  Oh, yeah.

I told lamer saruman I was bringing three.  Senior senior citizen replied, “okay.”

Mila begging to come with?  Problem solved.

My presence gets a lot of raised eyebrows.  Having three servants raises them even more.  Damn look at them get up there.  They’re fighting for space with the hairlines.

Now, unfortunately, I don’t recognize anybody.  And I probably should.  Yeah, I did private testing except for the instrument part.  But I was at the balls and game day.

Just, sort of, don’t care.  Guys I could care less about and the few girls here don’t have enough meat on their bones, years on their calendar, or tits on their torso.

Looks like the boy with two servants is about to send one over to start shit.  Some muscular beastkin bodyguard looking dude who has been making eyes at Mila since we entered.

Wouldn’t be my fault if my swords, sort of, slip and chop him in two.  Right?  Like totally on accident.

Yes officer.  Him falling on my swords forty-two times is rather hard to believe.  But I swear on the playstation I stole, er, borrowed from a friend that its really what happened.  Like really really.

Oh?  Those other guys?  No.  I totally killed them.

Yep, still out of bubblegu-

“Hello class, please take your seats.”

In walks, an old but fit dude.

“I sincerely regret not being on time but first days can be hectic.”

His arms are full of scrolls and books.  He even has a backpack on that’s filled with, wood?

“Oh hoh!  Looks like we’ve got a couple of celebrities with us today.”

Dude, don’t look at me.

“Since I am late we better get started right away.  We’ll do introductions another time.”

Dumps everything on his table slash desk upfront.

“First, is an object that is both porous and fibrous.  A vital part of our civilization.  Its existence has allowed the Peoples of the Mandate to resist both the elements and the Fallen.”

Uh…  Dude?

“The ancients called it Lignarumite.  And through them we learned many of its wonders.  But those working in the trade have another name for this gift from the gods.”

Don’t go there.

“We call it.”

Seriously?

“Wood.”

*thump*

Head?  Meet table.

...

I hate school.