Chapter 34 – Dead in the Water
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Fey ended up carrying Squishy in her pouch, putting the tiny jellyfish in an empty potion bottle. She made a mental note to acquire a larger container before Squishy outgrew the current one.

Fey and company swam back to Pearlview, the trip so long that Fey and Blade each gained a stamina point. Since they were moving (pathetically) slowly by mermaid standards, Sirena failed to increase her stamina.

 

By night, Pearlview glowed beautifully with bioluminescent corals. Fey looked around with admiration. :Pwetty,: she said again (à la Chapter 30).

Amethyst, who was glowing (cutely) purple in the dark, squeaked questioningly from her position dangling off of Fey’s neck.

:Yes, yes, you’re pretty, too,: said Fey, giving the slime a pat. Amethyst smiled (cutely), easily pleased.

 

Before they had entered far into town, Sirena paused and cocked her head in a listening pose. :Do you hear that?: she asked.

Fey and Blade also paused. Faint telepathic singing could be heard, the voice male and the song a pop love ballad that was currently on the top music charts.

:Nice. A bard?: said Fey. Controlling telepathy was as challenging as controlling sound through vocal cords, and the voice was smooth and well-trained, perfectly on pitch.

“Probably,” Blade agreed.

:Let’s go see!: Without waiting for agreement, Sirena swam off in the direction of the telepathic sound.

As the party drew near to the source of the singing, it became more clear and distinct. Fey rather liked the music. The song was one that sounded good even without instrumental accompaniment, and the singer’s performance was as good as the original artist’s.

 

They came across a large gathering of mermaids. Unlike on land, where onlookers were restricted to a two-dimensional ring around a street performer, the mermaids formed more of a globe shape as they all tried to get a good view.

“That must be it,” said Blade. With the crowd of mermaids, it was impossible to see the singer, but his voice came through easily.

:I’m going to try to get a better look,: said Sirena. She swam around to the other side of the crowd, looking for a gap.

 

:You go ahead,: said Fey. She hung back with Blade. Fey had an aversion to finding out the appearances of singers she liked. In her imagination, their faces and bodies were as attractive as their voices, but this was almost never the case, leading to strong feelings of disappointment whenever she was faced with the reality of their looks.

 

Blade had a much simpler reason for staying behind. He much preferred looking at all the attractive mermaids (and their ‘upper tail sections’) over some random male bard.

 

The song ended after several minutes.

<Fey has listened to a bard’s love ballad.>

<Effect: +10 charisma, +5 intelligence>

<Duration: 1 hour>

The performance was met with loud applause and high-pitched cheering. Fey could not decide whether fangirl squealing was more irritating as sound or as telepathic screeching direct to her mind. Nonetheless, she and Blade applauded along with the crowd, more impressed with the stat boost than the singing itself.

The crowd began to shift. Some players dispersed, presumably off to finish some training while the bard’s stat boost was in effect. Some jostled for position to try to speak with the performer. Some drifted, chatting excitedly in smaller groups.

 

Fey and Blade were still unable to see the singer from their position, but the movement allowed Sirena to peek through. “Meh,” she reported through party chat. “Not that bad-looking, but bland.”

 

“Good to know,” Fey replied. She also used party chat so she would not have to yell at Sirena over the distance that separated them. “Ready to go?”

“Hold on a sec. I want to put some coins in the collection bowl as thanks for the intelligence buff.”

“Okay.” Fey pulled Amethyst off her neck and prepared to train Immunity while she waited. :Amethyst, poison mushroom poison.:

Amethyst obediently secreted the requested toxin. Apparently, it was water-soluble, as a faintly purple-tinged sphere spread out around the slime.

<Amethyst has learned Poison Sphere!>

<Poison Sphere: When underwater, spread poison effects throughout an area. Poison types available are those learned for Poison Slime.>

<Level 1: 1m radius, 10 second duration>

 

<Fey has been poisoned!>

<Poison mushroom poison: -4 health/20 seconds>

  <Duration: 10 minutes>    

<Level 7 Immunity effect: -3 damage per poison infliction>

<Net effect: -1 health/20 seconds>

<Duration: 10 minutes>

 

<Blade has been poisoned!>

<Poison mushroom poison: -4 health/20 seconds>

<Duration: 10 minutes>

<Level 2 Immunity effect: -1 damage per poison infliction, -1 minute duration>

<Net effect: -3 health/20 seconds>

<Duration: 9 minutes>

 

“[Censored word]!” Blade yelled. He flinched and put several metres between himself and Fey (or, more accurately, Amethyst). “Stop [censored word]ing doing that!”

:Sorry: Fey apologized meekly. :I honestly didn’t know that was going to happen.:

Blade scowled and crossed his arms in a disgruntled fashion. The poison mushroom poison caused blurry vision but no pain, and the damage was something his health reserves could handle, so he decided to save his dwindling stock of antidotes in case Fey ‘accidentally’ poisoned him with something worse.

 

“What happened?” asked Sirena. Still somewhere amongst the crowd, she had heard Blade’s expletive-filled exclamations through party chat.

“Fey poisoned me again!”

“Again? How many times has she poisoned you?”

“I’ve lost count,” Blade grumbled.

Fey hazarded a guess. “Four or five?”

(In fact, this was the seventh instance in which Blade had been poisoned in Fey’s presence.)

“It feels like a lot more,” Blade grumbled.

“Wow. You ought to stop doing that, Fey,” said Sirena.

“I’m mostly not doing it on purpose.”

 

The conversation was cut short when Fey’s still-blurry vision detected mermaid-shaped blobs approaching. “Are those people swimming towards us?”

“Looks like it,” said Blade. His vision was similarly compromised.

:Hey, look, humans!: came an unfamiliar telepathic voice. Multiple blobs approached.

“I’m an elf,” Fey muttered. She hastily pulled off the choker holding her telepathy stone and pressed it into Blade’s hand.

“What?” he asked confusedly.

“Take it. You deal with them,” said Fey. Once again, she was using Blade to allow herself to be antisocial.

“Okay…” Blade fastened the choker onto his neck. Thankfully, it automatically adjusted to its user and did not actually choke him with a Fey’s-neck-sized circumference.

 

Several mermaids were now within conversational distance. Blade did his best to imitate making normal eye contact despite his poison-induced myopia. All he could really make out was the outline of each player and their skin colours, which varied between blue-green and turquoise.

:Hello! I’m Shelly.:

Several other mermaids introduced themselves in quick succession (with the author being too lazy to make up their names).

:Hi, I’m Blade, and this is Fey.:

 

Fey gave a little wave and her best bland smile.

 

The mermaids all said ‘hello’ again.

:When did you get to Pearlview?:

:What level are you?:

:Are you looking for a party?:

The rapid-fire questions were all directed at Blade, who answered as best he could.

 

Fey kept a pleasant expression on her face, but mentally tuned out of the conversation. Your desperation is showing, she mentally told the mermaids. She did not know if their efforts to entice Blade to join their party was normal behaviour (for them), or if the scarcity of male players in Pearlview had driven them to extremes.

So as not to distract Blade from his conversation, Fey talked to Sirena via private message:

<Fey: You done yet? If we don’t leave soon, there is a distinct possibility that someone will entice our tank away from us.>

<Sirena: Yup, coming. Oh, look, the bard guy is coming your way. I’m right behind him.>

<Fey: Everything is blurry right now. Side effect of the poison.>

<Sirena: Right. Why are you poisoning yourself, again?>

<Fey: I’m training my Immunity.>

<Sirena: And Blade’s, against his will.>

 

Coincidentally, it was at this point that Blade’s poisoned status ran its course.

<Blade’s Immunity has reached level 3!>

The system notification caused Blade to temporarily stutter in his speech, but he carried on without the mermaids noticing anything out of the ordinary.

 

In Fey’s still-blurry vision, another blob approached. Its presence caused the blobs currently speaking to Blade to move aside in deference. Another blob, which Fey could tell was Sirena based on the mage robes, circled around to come to a stop beside Fey.

 

:I just had to say hello to a fellow fellow out here,: came an unfamiliar male voice. Despite the cheerful delivery, Fey sensed that the merman was less than pleased to have competition of the male kind in Pearlview.

 

Perhaps not sensing the concealed hostility, Blade answered in a friendly way. :Hey. I’m Blade.: He offered a hand, which the merman slapped in a casual greeting style.

 

:I’m Requiem,: said the bard. Fey gave him points for having a name that combined music and death into one word.

 

It was at this point that Fey’s poison wore off.

<Fey’s Immunity has reached level 8!>

With her newly restored vision, Fey was able to examine Requiem’s appearance for the first time. She agreed with Sirena’s assessment of “bland”. He reminded her of a fashion model; there was no feature of his face or body that had any real flaw, but she felt no ‘character’ in his appearance. She gave a mental sigh. As usual, she preferred the singer’s voice over his looks.

 

Belatedly, Fey realized that Requiem was looking at her rather than focusing on Blade.

:And who might this be?: Requiem asked.

:This is Fey. She doesn’t have a telepathy stone right now.: Blade answered. Only Fey heard the slight but distinct emphasis on the last two words of his sentence.

“Wait, when did you give Blade your telepathy stone?” asked Sirena through party chat.

Fey smiled blandly at Requiem while answering, “When the people came over, duh. Just go with it.”

 

:No telepathy stone? And I thought she was just being shy.: Requiem smiled at Fey as if expecting her to giggle.

Instead, Fey’s smile became more fixed and less natural. Requiem did not appear to notice Fey’s unenthusiastic response to his attempt at joking.

 

Sirena supplied all of the missing giggling. It always amused her whenever someone tried to flirt with her best friend, whose thought patterns were so aberrant that normal social interactions completely failed. Fey generally treated the conversation of flirting as ‘stupid questions and unwelcome observations’, and often would not even realize someone was trying to flirt until after she had already ended the conversation with hostilely sarcastic remarks.

 

:Oh, Fey definitely isn’t shy,: Blade said wryly. He could think of a lot of words to describe his party mate, but “shy” was not one of them.

 

:Well, we’ll just have to get her a telepathy stone, won’t we? Come on,: said Requiem. He grasped Fey’s wrist, intending to lead her to the accessory shop, only to be surprised as she quickly and easily twisted her hand free (remember, just pull against the thumb).

 

An awkward pause at the rather hostile reaction, then Sirena explained, :That’s just a reflex she has.:

 

Fey’s smile was now apologetic, but something in her expression warned Requiem not to try to grab her again.

 

The merman visibly rallied his efforts to appear charming and confident. :To the accessory shop!: he announced, then swam off alone as if that had been his plan all along.

 

“So… Is he trying to get me to buy my own telepathy stone, or offering to buy one?” asked Fey.

 

Sirena giggled. “Who knows? Either way, this is hilarious. We should follow him.” Grabbing Fey’s hand, Sirena failed to activate Fey’s ‘escape’ reflex and started towards the accessory shop.

 

When Blade started to follow his party-mates, he was stopped by Shelly and company.

:Don’t you want to join our party instead?: he was asked.

 

Blade glanced over at his unusual party. Fey and Sirena had heard the question and paused to listen to his response. The girls looked like they expected him to accept the mermaid party’s invitation.

Rather perversely, this caused Blade to want to stay. He gently disengaged his arm from Shelly’s grasp. :Sorry, I already have a party.:

Fey and Sirena both gave him quintessentially female enigmatic smiles before turning to follow Requiem. He had no idea what they meant, but he got the impression that they were happy he had not abandoned them. (Sirena was thinking, “I might just really like you,” while Fey was thinking, “Good, I won’t have to find another meatshield.”)

 

Fey’s party descended into the roofless accessory store in time to hear Requiem ask, :Don’t you have any colours other than blue? It should complement her eyes.:

Fey rolled her apparently un-complemented eyes. Light blue kyanite matched her dark purple colouring just fine.

:There are other crystals that can be enchanted with telepathy, but they are more expensive: answered the shop-keeper.

:That’s fine: answered Requiem. :Do you have pink?:

 

Fey grimaced. She hated pink, which she saw as a weak, pathetic version of a proper red.

 

Sirena was now giggling to the point of holding her sides in pain. :This is the funniest thing that’s happened since that guy tried to help you skate a few years ago,: she gasped, quiet enough that Requiem did not catch the words. She referred to an incident where a misguided acquaintance had grabbed Arwyn’s arm at the skating rink and upset her balance, nearly causing her to fall onto the ice. (In Canada, the ‘ice’ in ‘ice skating’ is implied.)

 

:What’s so funny?: asked the bard.

Sirena waved a webbed hand in a dismissive gesture. :Oh, nothing, nothing. Carry on.: Her denial was made less convincing by the fact that her giggling had not stopped.

 

Blade was torn between amusement at Requiem’s attempts to treat Fey like a normal girl and the feeling that he was being a bad person by not clarifying things for the merman. It was mostly the fact that he was not quite sure of how he would explain Fey to Requiem that caused him to stay silent.

 

The shop-keeper opened a small jewellery box, revealing a pink crystal set in a silver chain. :This one is 15,000g,: he said.

 

Fey gasped. The pink telepathy stone was three times the price of the regular blue one. There’s no way he’d buy it, right?

 

Requiem appeared unpleasantly surprised by the price of the stone, but with the pressure of eyes watching his actions, went ahead with his intentions of buying it for Fey. :I’ll take it. Just let me get to the bank and -: The bard stopped speaking abruptly as Fey swam behind Blade and began unfastening the choker around his neck.

 

Fey could not let this random stranger waste 15,000g on a stone she neither wanted nor needed. Requiem seemed like a good enough person, if rather misguided (and with horrible taste in colours). Unaware of how intimate the gesture looked, she removed her telepathy stone from Blade’s throat and replaced it on her own neck.

:This one’s mine,: she explained apologetically. Not wanting to deal with the awkward fall-out, she said a quick goodbye and logged out even though it was early.

 

Still laughing her head off, Sirena said :See you tomorrow, Blade!: and followed suit.

 

Requiem’s expression shifted from shock to unhappiness at being made a fool of, then into an anger directed squarely at Blade. The merman’s expression turned ugly as he glared at the human. :You think you’re better than me? Just you wait, I’ll steal that Fey girl from you.: He swam off with a violent swish of his tail that knocked over some of the small items being displayed in the accessory shop.

 

Blade tried to reply, but then remembered that Fey had reclaimed her telepathy stone. He sighed, shaking his head at the merman’s misapprehension.

 

The shop-keeper went about straightening his shop with a resigned look. Feeling guilty even though he was probably the least to blame for the whole incident, Blade helped the NPC straighten up before logging out himself. It did not occur to him that before meeting Fey, he never would have felt guilty for inconveniencing an NPC.

 

◊◊◊

 

Arwyn opened her eyes groggily and glance at the clock. It was slightly before 6 a.m. Way too early. Feeling the stuffiness in her head that told her she had not had enough sleep, she zombie-shambled her way to her bedroom and snuggled amongst her (five) pillows to go through another REM cycle[i].

 

Slightly after 8 a.m., Arwyn yawned and sat up, still hugging a pillow. It was Saturday, so she contemplated whether she should leave her comfortable bed. With her game-playing, she was sleeping more than usual, and did not feel sleepy at all.

 

Eventually, hunger drove her to get moving. She put down the pillow and made her way lazily to the kitchen.

Her fridge was woefully out of stock. Arwyn was forced to look in the freezer for breakfast, finding some frozen (chocolate chip) waffles she put in the toaster. Time to go grocery shopping.

 

After eating, Arwyn dressed in clothing suitable for running errands, grabbed her purse and keys, and headed for her local supermarket. She was a person who did not enjoy cooking, but enjoyed eating home-cooked food. She also enjoyed sweet and salty junk foods, and was paranoid about food going spoiled. This resulted in a distinctive pattern of purchases, where she bought small amounts of fresh produce, a lot of canned and frozen foods, and what seemed like far too many boxes of cookies and bags of chips for one person.

Still, as Arwyn walked up and down the aisles pushing a grocery cart, she looked fairly normal. Her actions and appearance gave no real hints as to the alien shape of the inner recesses of her mind. The only thing that an objective observer might guess about her would be that she was about to throw a party. (Nope, she really is going to eat all of those chips by herself. No, she has no idea why she’s still skinny.)

 

After returning home, Arwyn cooked herself lunch, a process that took an unreasonable amount of time because she was extremely slow at chopping vegetables. She ate and put the leftovers away, wondering what to do with her afternoon.

No activity could hold her interest. She drifted from the computer to the television, then wandered randomly around the house, in a strangely restless mood.

 

Arwyn realized that she had not read a book in almost two weeks. Reading was something that she did for fun and relaxation, and she started exhibiting strange withdrawal symptoms if she went too long without consuming a book. Even fun activities like Fantasia could only partially replace reading to keep her mentally balanced. (Wait, she’s mentally balanced?) She headed out the door, walking to her local public library.


Footnotes

[i] When sleeping, people cycle through different stages of lighter and deeper sleep. REM stands for “rapid eye movement” and is the stage of sleep in which dreaming occurs. It takes approximately 90-120 minutes to go through a complete sleep cycle.

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