So do we start here or– No, Zee, this is where the Content Warnings go. Oh! Sorry about that folks, ahem: Trans Slurs, Transphobia, Death?

 

Sue

 

“I expected you to brute force your way through, but you savages must be smarter than you look!”

The moment we’re returned to the flow of time, we’re struck with the weight of everything that had just happened, only to have to push it all back realizing we’re not out of the danger zone yet. It may have been smarter to go back earlier, but we know after all we’ve just been through, we’d collapse and pass out for a whole day, and we can’t risk Liz recruiting someone else into the fate we’d just witnessed. Gotta ride this adrenaline, and also not waste our last chance, no biggie, y’know? Just play it cool. All we need to do is figure out how to counter his spells. Can we knock the wand out of his grasp? Even if we could bypass his forcefield, we have no way of telling if that would interrupt the casting of the spell itself. Do you think there’s a chance we could hack into him with his guard down? Doubt it. It seems to be automatic, which makes sense for who we’re talking about here. Goddess dammit all! This is our last chance, there has to be something we can do…!

“Sue?”

Ah, shit. Fox looks back at us with a concerned look, her Shadow extending towards us and reaching up to lock her fingers with ours as we stand there, having not been following the other girls. Right. Keep it together. We’ll figure something out…

Nodding at our partner, we follow along, letting things play out as they had before, since it had all been going well up to that point, this should give us enough time to think of a plan.

So we sit, listening to Hal prattle on and on, waiting for Violet to go about her plan…when something different happens this time around. A pair of gold, translucent, disembodied claws float around Fox and Violet, landing upon the cuffs binding us to these chairs. What in the…we should be the only ones able to make any changes, right? So who…

It’s Coyotl. This time space’s Coyotl. We recognize those claws. It looks as though she’s going to try breaking the cuffs, but Violet wags a finger at her before snapping the bindings herself.

“I’s gots another business proposition for yous,” we hear Liz say for a second time, rising and shooting just as she had before, starting the fight all over again. 

Okay, focus, don’t focus on Coyotl, alright? …I can try. No guarantees though. Thanks, Zee. Back on task, we run through the same song and dance as the robots are funneled out, taking care of the civilians while we continue formulating a plan, or trying to at least. Think we should call in one of our prototypes? While I’m sure Project ASSEMBLED is strong enough to break through to Hal before he could even consider a spell, the assembly time is more than enough for him to make his move, not even taking into account needing to assemble it without interruption on a battlefield. It’s also a prototype, we need more time to work out the kinks. Maybe Project Double Vision? Nuh uh, it’s all the way back home, no way it has time to zip over here, and we don’t have schematics to build it with the Navi Bots. Also a prototype as well.

“You’re no match, Hal!”

“Give up.”

Arg, Goddess dammit, we’re running out of time and options! There has to be something, something we haven’t thought of, something…new?

Stepping back to observe the fighting for a moment, we notice an additional variable: Coyotl, in the form of a shimmering specter, swinging her sword around and clashing with the metal monsters about. Coyotl…Magical counter…Inkton Witch…

That’s it.

That’s it!

We’ve seen her cast it enough times to tell it’s one of those generic spells, akin to Soul Siphon, so all we’d need is a magical item of our own…our watch maybe? Possible, but it’s out of charges now, we can’t be certain it can be used to cast spells any more. Fox has her scarf, but… We saw how that turned out last time. Dammit! Think, think, think…! Our mind runs a mile a minute, our hands coming up to hold it, keeping us steady, feeling…Cat.

Didn’t she say it isn’t magical?

She didn’t think it was magical.

But you remember how our watch was made.

Holy shit.

“This is what you’ve given up along with your humanity, wretch! A mastery over magic only human might could ever muster!”

This is it. The moment of truth.

“LIZ, CALL BACK YOUR RATS!!”

The rat, quick as a mouse, glances our way and smirks, catching on that we have a plan and being more than eager to play along. Just as Hal’s spell goes out, we press our index and middle finger to the button atop our hat, feeling her warmth spread down our arm, filling our body like the gentle embers of a lovingly kindled fire…a warmth which welcomes us home…

 

Deep breath.

A home I want to stay in.

Our home…

 

“I WON’T LET YOU!! NOT AGAIN!! NOT EVER!!”

The magic courses through us, just the same as it has when traveling through time, but this time, we guide its flow, concentrating it within our core before releasing it in a brilliant explosion of light, consuming the entire room in a blinding flash, and as it fades…the world stands still.

Violet is safe.

“...What…?” Hal mutters in disbelief, looking at his wand and shaking it around. “No, there must have been some sort of error. Again!”

“Dispel!!” I chant, getting a better grip on the energy whirling inside of us, allowing the spell to come forth even faster this time, feeling a sense of pride in our revelation as we see Hal grow more and more frustrated.

“You– YOU–!! ALL EYES ON THE FURLESS ONE!!”

Once more and once more again, he attempts to cast his spell, but Violet doesn’t let a single foe near as she slides closer, rending with claws and deflecting with darkness, making it easy to dispel each one after another.

“Have I ever told you how brilliant and beautiful you two are?”

Goddess, while we’re fighting??? She doesn’t waste a beat in her defense to compliment us, and gosh, she’s a charmer, maiming and tearing just for us, wow!

“Well, there’s nothing more stunning than a woman destroying all in sight for us, so we’ve got to compete somehow, right?” I retort with a wink, which, shit, I guess she can’t see from under these goggles, oh well. At the very least, the comment earns us a bashful ‘hmph,’ her fury uninterrupted even by her cuteness.

“Alright, lovers,” Liz chimes in, shaking her head as she holsters he gun and whips out her bat, apparently having dealt with all the cop bots, “kissin’ ‘n huggin’ can waits for after we turn dis corporate schmuck inta scrap metal~”

Violet, of course, defies the rat, reeling back a claw and SMASHING it into the ground, her darkness splashing off Fox’s arm and blowing any nearby or approaching machines away, giving her time to oh my gosh just sweep us off our feet and kiss us on the lips holy shit.

“Fuck you, rat,” she grumbles as we’re dropped back down and left swooning, the rat rolling her eyes while we shake ourselves back to composure.

“You queer freaks, you disgust me!” Hal adds, clearly getting flustered and frustrated by all the destruction and homosexual activity going on before him. “You have no idea the degeneracy the world will devolve into with you in charge!!”

Liz, however, only smirks. “Sounds like my kinda world.”

Just like that, she resummons her band of rats and throws her bat over a crowd of robots, and with the help of a group of rats at her heels, leaps and launches herself over the soon to be scraps. Snatching her bat up and spinning into a downwards swing into the ground, she creates an earth shuddering impact that rattles each mechanical abomination, quickly disposing of the rest with a furious spinning attack.

We clear the room of all other foes with ease, Fox and Violet back on their business with support from Zee’s fists, leaving us alone with the rattling robot on stage, throwing his wand to the ground in utter frustration.

“You have gotten on the last of my NERVES, ANIMALS!!”

“You mean the nerves you don’t have?” Fox jeers, wiggling her digits mockingly at Hal. “This is what you’ve given up along with your humanity, wretch! A mastery over senses only human might could ever muster!”

Oh my Goddess, Fox. All of us snickering amongst ourselves only makes Hal seethe further.

“I’ve had just about ENOUGH of you freaks!” the robot screeches, flashing lights in his iris showing some unknown program being run. “If these stupid robots cannot do the job, then I shall do it myself! WELCOME TO MY DIGITAL REALM, QUEERS!!”

What the–

 

…Huh?

Some kind of digital wave emanates from Hal, and suddenly we…I? I feel a whole lot lonelier? Sue? Sue?! Oh my Goddess–

Thud.

To our side, we see the Rat Queen fall to the ground limply, and Violet quickly and violently coats Fox’s body, as if forced out.

“...Violet?”

“...Ugh,” the wolf groans, sticking her own shadowy claw into herself…only for it to pass right through her.

“...Uh huh. So…” I begin mumbling to myself, only for Violet to complete my thought.

“He pulled our consciousnesses out of us,” she begins, pointing to the screen of Hal’s iris, displaying some kind of loading screen while the man himself remains entirely silent, “Except he failed to consider what would happen if there were multiple consciousnesses in a single body.”

Oh my Goddess.

“How neurotypical,” I sigh, “Well…if they’re in there now, we can’t exactly destroy him, can we?”

Vi groans again, sitting down with a heavy thud and shaking her head in annoyance.

“Guess we’ll fucking wait for everyone to do their song and dance.”

…Hmm…unless…

“Hey Vi, what is your power called exactly?”

The wolf looks at me curiously.

“Darkness by Extension.”

Oh ho ho.

“I’m not exactly one to idle backstage,” I begin before turning our body to face Violet, extending an arm to the pretty wolf. “Will you join me center stage, darling~?”

“...Heh. I guess I wouldn’t mind stealing the spotlight just this once.”

 

…It takes a moment to fully realize our surroundings. Our? My? Zee? You there, lil’ guy? Hello?

…Dammit. The full picture becomes clear as the rest of the setting loads in, the plain of a square grid stretching beyond the virtual horizon before being loaded over with a very low poly jungle terrain. Speaking of low poly…it would seem my consciousness has been rendered as such as well, and such is the story for both Fox and Liz to my side.

“...I thought I was done being blocky after Ascending…” the poor vixen whines as she flexes and adjusts to her newly processed form, while Liz feels herself up and down, scowling realizing she’s without her rifle.

“Look at you all. You look terrible!” a pompous voice rings through the digital air, pulling all of our attention over to the incredibly high resolution knight on the other end of this overgrown clearing. He’s just…some white dude. In a suit of armour.

“...You had the choice to be anything, ANYTHING whatsoever,” I sneer, staring at this mess of a man, “and you chose to be another white guy paladin? Really?”

“Oh, shut up. I thought you transgenders were all about seeing yourselves represented!”

“Somebody please, put dis man through a media literacy course,” Liz jeers, shaking her head with arms folded as we each snicker at the reddening hyper realistic face opposing us.

“SILENCE!!” he cries, pointing his blade towards us. “I’ll be having the last laugh when you’re all hunted like the animals you are!”

With that, he charges towards us, and the sound of glass shattering echoes through the virtual world as the battle begins, Hal stopping in place as action gauges appear above all our heads.

Oh my Goddess.

He’s put us in a turn-based RPG.

“Of course, I have the highest speed stat–”

Hal wishes he could have finished his boisterous brag before Fox shoots him in the face, not actually piercing him, but looking more like he’d just been punched in the nose.

“Wh–WHAT?!”

“Hmm~?” Fox hums tauntingly, swaying her hips with a vicious grin on her muzzle. “You have the highest speed stat? Higher than the windy fox? Uh huh? You sure about that, buster?”

The scowl on Hal’s face is one I wish I could take a picture of.

“You filthy queers, always trying to cheat and put yourselves ahead of everybody else who actually had to put in the WORK to get where they–”

“Emerald mines.”

The knight shuts up quickly, turning his head towards us so slowly you could swear to hear stone grinding on concrete.

“What?”

“Emerald mines,” I repeat, hand on my hip, “Your parents owned emerald mines in Africa. You piggybacked off the riches your family made from their colonialism and bought your way to the top of Regal Robotics before renaming it and paying scientists to build shit in your name.”

“...”

Seeing him steaming with anger only gives me more reason to continue.

“Even then, all of your meddling and need to involve yourself has continually resulted in faulty products lauded as innovation by tech bros world wide. The Sky Rail? All show. It’s a set piece nobody really uses other than to say they have. You were so mad about the bans on automobiles, you had to make up something new to profit from–”

“WOULD YOU BE QUIET, YOU WHORE–”

Bang!! I’d distracted him long enough for Fox’s action gauge to refill, allowing her another shot at the pathetic knight, forcing Hal to wipe the fresh blood from his face.

“RAAAGHHH!! YOU FILTHY SLUTS!! I’VE HAD IT WITH YOU!!”

Seems the fight is finally on, Hal looking to Liz who had used her turn to summon her rat band, which seems to be giving her stat buffs.

“I am the master of this digital realm, I won’t let you forget!” Hal yells, raising his sword high and casting some kind of holy spell that manifests chains of light around Liz, binding her in place. “Buffs won’t do you very well if you can’t even attack! Hah! You haven’t the slightest idea about strategy, do you!?”

“Yous such a prick…! But yous won’t…get da last ‘a da Royal Rodents…!”

Liz is forced to use her turn to attempt a struggle at freedom, which leaves…me.

 

I can’t summon a weapon. I’ve got no Navi Bots on me. No skateboard. Throwing myself at him with a physical attack would be putting myself in needless danger…what am I supposed to do?! Dammit, once again, I feel damn well useless!

At the very least, Fox continues with her assault, dashing in this time and going for a windy slash, winding up for a follow up attack, but…can’t. Her usual flurry of attacks is held back by only having a single action per turn! On top of that, Hal’s armour seems to weather her assault with ease…

“See?! I’m the genius here! I knew you’d be nothing when I control the pace of battle!”

“...Then why don’t you give yourself more than one attack?” Fox ponders as she hops back, the gears in Hal’s head churning.

“...Shut up! I absolutely could but…I desire a fair fight, obviously!”

“Ah, so he didn’t even code this battle system himself,” I muse with a smirk. “Probably for the better, I would rather not chance clipping through the floor or something.”

“I’ve had just about ENOUGH of your COMPLETE AND TOTAL LIES!!”

Shit! With Liz continuing to curse and struggle within her shining binds, that leaves no one to take the heat as Hal charges towards me and cleaves right through me! Immediately I feel my will faltering, the sword clipping through me but dealing massive damage, enough to force me to a knee.

“What the FUCK!! LEAVE HER ALONE!!” Fox shouts, dashing towards Hal, the windy visage of a train whirling before her as she crashes into the knight, and though he flinches more than her previous attack, Hal remains standing firmly.

“Heh. Look at you all. Nothing without your toys. Like fish out of water in this realm of mine,” Hal sneers, raising his sword over his head once more. “I shall put you out of your misery!! You will not be missed!!”

Dammit, dammit, no! What can I do, what can I–

Shwing!

The sound of a swinging blade is followed by the clashing of steel, the sparks from which flicker by my face as I flinch…only to find myself…fine? Wait, what…

Coyotl!

While she was previously just a pair of disembodied hands, I now see her entire glowing form, her blade holding back Hal’s attack!

“For Pete’s sake– ANOTHER ONE OF YOU?!”

Her strength seems to eclipse his, shoving him back and driving him away with a heavy swing following up her defense.

“There’s always more of us!” Coyotl shouts, moving in again with a lunging stab, seemingly unbound by the mechanics of this digital realm! “If you think you can stamp us out…you’re wrong!”

All of us stare on in digitized awe as Coyotl unleashes a barrage of heavy swings, unrelenting against the knight! With him distracted, Fox turns her attention to Liz, summoning her guitar and strumming a speedy tune, a melodic wind enrapturing the rat as her rat band follows along, giving her the boost in strength to shatter her bindings!

“Yous really shoulda started with dat one, foxy~”

“I got caught up in the moment! Sue me!”

 

The rat smirks and summons her bat, only to glance my way and shrug.

“Can we’s get some first aid ova here?!”

And just like that, another swarm of rats digitizes into existence, all in little nurse hats with medkits and other doctors tools. I’m not gonna question the extremely skimpily dressed rat, the healing is much appreciated, feeling my vitality being gradually restored as they scamper around me.

Then…it’s back to my turn, still on the first turn, having yet to take it.

Oh, doy.

Watching Coyotl in action, she reminds me once again of Cat’s Boon. Hal may have deprived us of our weapons and items, but with our clothing and accessories intact, I can see just what this thing can do. Fire powers, right? If I’m remembering this correctly, then…focusing on that magic, I instead allow my own flow into the pin, my eyes alight and ablaze.

“Let’s put just a little oomph in this one,” I mutter to myself as a little burning clock begins to tick down over Hal’s head, catching Coyotl’s attention and prompting her to push Hal back and put her guard up.

“If it’s big attacks we need…I can do that too,” Fox says, hunkering down and spending her turn assembling a windy sniper, an attack that’ll take more than one turn clearly, but it could be the punch we need.

“BACK WITH YOU!!” Hal shouts at Coyotl. “WHO EVEN ARE YOU?!”

The chimera smirks, stepping back and holding her blade up defensively.

“You may know me as rotten brat. Remember me as Coyotl while you still can!”

Hal lets out a frenzied cry, leaping towards Coyotl with a grand strike, only to be caught by the plink of a baseball bat, being sent hurtling back from Liz’s interception.

“Now!”

My voice is punctuated by the explosion over Hal’s head, not an incredibly powerful one, but strong enough to send him plummeting back down to the ground, creating a very jagged polygonal crater in his wake.

“This…This is impossible…! This is my realm–”

BANG!! The sound of Fox’s sniper cuts him off an additional time, thank the Goddess, having aimed for a beckoning Liz who swings her bat and ricochets the bullet directly at Hal’s skull, leaving the knight at the brink of total HP loss.

“GAAHHH!! S-STOP HURTING ME!!” the pathetic knight cries, pulling himself up and drinking from a golden flask, helping him to recover somewhat. “Y…you’re all so pathetic and cruel…ganging up on an old man like this…”

“Be quiet.”

I can’t take listening to him any more.

“I watched you kill my friends.”

So I begin stomping up towards him.

“My family.”

My sheer presence looming over him.

“Over. And over.”

Then all of me looming over him as he grovels in his smoking crater.

“All without the tiniest shred of remorse, snuffing out life like you would a fly.”

Leaning down, I pull off my goggles and stare into his eyes.

“You took my future from me. And for that, I’m taking yours.”

“W-WAIT!!” he begs, scrambling back and pointing his sword at me. “I-if you kill me, you’ll ALL die!! This is my digital world!! I am still in CONTROL!!”

[“PRESTO.”]

 

Just as Hal claims to have us in an ultimatum, I feel my other half finally find his way back. [ITS WAY BACK, DARLING.] Oh ho?

Polygons in the distance flicker and turn back, slowly encroaching on us until leaving only the small clearing untouched, the darkened skybox making itself known with a draconic wolf face forming out of its darkness, dripping and oozing liquid code.

[“GREETINGS, MY DARLINGS”] it shouts, its bitcrushed voice echoing all throughout the cyber space. [“APOLOGIES FOR THE WAIT. THAT FIREWALL WAS <FUCKING BULLSHIT>!”]

Its voice is deep yet soothing, motherly in a playful way really. Its face recedes into the darkness before the rest of it rises from the nearby darkness, revealing its full form, a pear shaped, dragon shaped wolf made of black, liquid code, looming over the entire party by an entire storey.

“...I’m doomed,” Hal mutters, his disposition clearly deteriorating as his fate weighs upon him. “N-no, no no, I-I’ve worked too hard, I– I could have ruled the world, I–!!”

Liz shuts him up for a moment with a loud bonk on the head with her bat, allowing us all to focus on… [CALL ME SYSTEM UPDATE, IF YOU’D PLEASE.] A lovely name!

[“IF YOU ALL WOULD JOIN ME PLEASE,”] System Update asks, gesturing to a sudden tear within the digital space that looks like a whirling vortex of numbers and an endlessly spiraling polyline. [“I WOULD LOVE TO EVACUATE YOU ALL FROM THIS <TRASH FIRE KING> AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE!”]

All of us look at one another, Coyotl nodding as her glowing form begins to dissipate, disappearing entirely a moment later. Liz is the first to make her way towards the digital portal, turning back before she enters and looking at me.

“I’s got robots ta rescue. Make. Dis. Fucker. Pay.”

“That’s been the plan for the past century.”

With her eager grin, she hops into the vortex, along with all of her rats jumping in behind her one by one. Next is Fox, who takes my hand in her claw and gives it a squeeze.

“We’re almost there. I’ll catch you on the flip side.”

Gosh. I give her the best smile I can through my exhaustion, squeezing her claw back and nodding, prompting her to zip out the second after.

Thus, it’s just me, System Update…and Hal.

“...P-please, I could do so much good…!” he continues to beg and plead as System Update’s darkness creeps up over his many polygons. “D-DON’T KILL ME, I-I DON’T DESERVE TO DIE!!”

System Update, can you open a hole straight to the heart of this harddrive? [WHY, I LIKE THE WAY YOU THINK. ALLOW ME TO SEND HIM <STRAIGHT TO HELL>!]

To our side, the grid of polygons begins to crease and bend, snapping open and leading into the darkest depths of this machine’s code. Alright…one last thing. I get down on a knee and stare Hal deep into his eyes, grabbing him by the plates on his shoulders.

“Nobody deserves to die,” I tell him, hauling him up and holding him over the pit. “Unfortunately, neither you nor I learnt that fast enough.”

20 charges of fire bomb. The clock begins to tick over his head, slowly, and oh, so loudly, ringing and reminding him of his ever approaching demise.

“See you in hell, Hal.”

I let go and watch him drop, kicking and screaming, his voice as grating as ever even in his very last moments. Looking at System Update, we nod at one another before I step into the portal out, the duet behind me sinking back into the darkness.