I felt like a carriage run me over. Three and a half times. As I woke up, I didn´t open my eyes immediately, which was the right decision. Even through my closed eyelids, I could see the sun shining through a window. Groaning slightly, I felt a lot of bare, warm skin beneath me and let my hands wander upwards towards the headboard. Soon, they found the object of my desires under the pillow Hannah´s head was resting on.

With one hand, I pushed myself up from her while the other clumsily put the glasses on my nose.

“What the …” Why was I missing memories of around half the time we spent in bed? “where is my …” I slumped down again, defeated by grogginess and a hangover I never had like this before. Laying half over Hannah who started to stir, I closed my eyes once again, my limbs sprawling in every direction.

“Why … why are we naked?” Hannah asked, her eyes slowly opening.

“How should I know? Did we … you know?” I asked, pressing my face into the mattress.

“No … I don’t think so … but you did suck my blood.” She admitted and a bit of my memory came back. I apparently overdid it a bit, found it funny to bite her, but certainly not that the effect of the alcohol was reduced again.

“Oh, fuck. I´m sorry.” I said and meant it like that. I didn´t want to bite her and had a bad feeling she would condemn me for my actions.

“… don’t worry.” She said, rubbing her head and slowly crawling out from underneath me.

“Be happy!” I exclaimed let my face fall onto the mattress once more.

“Well, at least we didn´t do that.” She said, finally free from me.

“Yeah … would be kind of awkward … but why am I missing so much about that night?” I asked myself.

“Maybe you should ask all the drugs you took.” Well … that could have been another explanation.

“Dang …” I muttered and pulled myself to the edge of the bed. We definitely overdid it. I must have drunk at least ten bottles of wine and I could still feel the effect even at the next day. Well, it wasn’t the first time I was completely wasted because of alcohol and drug abuse … so whatever.

“This is the worst I ever felt.” Hannah said, sitting on the edge of the bed right next to me.

“I heard drinking alcohol helps against that.” I said, picking up a nearly empty wine bottle on the ground and lifting it up. Holding it horizontally, I tilted it until a few drops fell onto the ground, dirtying the wooden floor a bit.

“I´d rather not …” She said and stood up slowly, searching for her things to wear. She struggled a bit, but with a bit of help from my side as I pushed her a bit, she managed to stand up with wobbly knees.

“I have so much to do …” I muttered, remembering the piles of documents on Mary´s desk.

“Maybe you should write Mary a letter…” She said and picked up her underwear.

“Huh?” I muttered, not really understanding why she was mentioning that now.

“I mean, you are already done with the day, so why not make it a little bit worse?” She said and I finally understood she wanted me to tell Mary the truth.

“Uhh … I don’t want to tell her she needs to remarry some idiot.” I mumbled and held my head as a sharp pain shot through it.

“There are other options?” She said and threw my underwear towards me.

“… and what? Watching how her own distant family battles for her succession when she ages?” I asked, rolled on my back and covered myself with the panties she gave me.

“Adoption?” She asked.

“Nah, the others won´t accept that. She has to bear a child.” I explained.

“You aren’t that different to the nobles we despise so much …” She said, which did hurt me a little bit.

“Hmm? I´m not even remotely like they are, I just don’t see a problem with sticking that thing inside me a few times.” Was it the drugs? I usually forgot everything that Jacob and I did whenever I slept, but this time, it was strangely fresh on my mind.

“Sometimes I really wish you the best … and then there are the times when I wish you to get knocked up by some arse.” That … hurt a bit.

“Whoa … what´s the problem, Hannah? She isn´t in the position you were in. She can select whatever husband she wants.” I claimed and sat up to wear the nightgown Hannah threw at my head from the distance.

“And? Is there any love involved then?” She asked slowly.

“I don’t see how that is necessary.” Mary would need a successor in the future, not a doting husband.

“Stop seeing everything you have no emotional attachment to as a tool to achieve whatever you want.” She said angrily.

“… I can’t.” I muttered, even though I knew I would disappoint everyone with my answer.

“… why?” She asked after a long pause.

“Because that’s who I am. I´ll do everything it takes, otherwise Mary … and you wouldn’t be here.” I claimed quietly. My words hurt her, I knew that and I wouldn’t force Mary to do anything in that direction as I had no idea about how to even do that.

“… whatever. Get up, we have work to do.” She said, finally completely dressed up. She was right, there was a lot of work to do, but I still wondered how she managed to deal with hangover … because I certainly couldn’t.

Well, she wouldn’t let me sleep through the day though and rather squatted down in front of me and forced me to lay my arms over her shoulders.

“Will you write that latter?” She asked, grabbing around my thighs to pick me up.

“Hmm … I will. But I won´t be able to solve the succession problem for her.” I said, resting my chin on her shoulder as she stood up.

“Nobody expects you to.” She stated, filled with hypocrisy she didn´t realize herself. Everyone expected me to solve their problems, Hannah included. But I didn´t mind it as long as I was benefitting as well, or they were my friends and family.