Epilogue: Moving On
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I wished to myself that I’d packed more lightly. The steamer trunk, which had been my companion for the duration of my stay in Zrimash, was stuffed to the brim with clothes, which meant that it had a total weight of approximately six hundred million pounds. On the first leg of the journey, I’d tried to carry it like a regular person. When that proved too difficult, I resorted to dragging it. The repetitive scrape of the trunk’s bottom against the concrete had been the only clear sound in my ears for the last several minutes.

“What the hell are you doing?” Halflance said. I hadn’t noticed her approaching, which was either a testament to her stealth, or a testament to my lack of sleep.

I nodded at the steamer trunk. “It’s not going to get itself to the train,” I said. “The train to New Alderburg leaves in twenty minutes.”

Lady Halflance looked around. The Zander train station was cold, empty, and quiet, the gas lamps creating deep shadows in the predawn dark. “Emma, the train to New Alderburg leaves at six. Six in the evening.”

I stopped, the trunk hitting the ground with a heavy slam. “And how do you know that?”

“Because I purchased two additional tickets to that train not five minutes ago.”

“And why were you doing that?”

“Because Anna and Unity are going to be going with you,” she said.

“Wait, really?” I said. “All the way to New Alderburg? This isn’t even something that has anything to do with you, you really don’t have to do this.”

Lady Halflance did a sort of half-nod, the kind that indicates that she conceded my point. “Were it not for them, we would have never been able to retake Zrimash. And had we not been able to retake Zrimash, there would be no alliance between Bluerose and Urcos, the Chanter of Murahnok would be a Cassandran sympathizer instead of your friend Sarnai, and we would all probably be dead. So I thought they deserved a bit more respect on my end. And also a substantial pay raise.”

“Well, thank you. I appreciate that.”

“They asked to be sent with you, you know. Anna said that the two of them were worried you might get yourself in trouble if you spent too long on your own in a university town.”

“Ha. Maybe so.” I turned my attention to the path ahead; there was still about ten minutes of dragging before I reached the platform where the train to Zrimash was. As I did, I noticed something odd.

“So, if Anna and Unity are coming along… I’ll leave my trunk here, and you can ask them to find me. I have something I need to do, and once that’s done we can all carry it together, alright?”

Halflance frowned, likely trying to figure out what I could possibly have to do. “Certainly,” she said hesitantly, “I’ll let them know where to find you.”

“Thank you,” I said. “I’ll be gone for just a minute.”

Halflance turned away, and I started running toward the black-clad figure I’d seen sitting, relaxed, on the roof of one of the nearby train yard buildings.

The few weeks since the battle of Zrimash had been blissfully free of mortal peril and murder mysteries. This was good, because it meant that I could actually fucking rest, and bad because all the boredom gave me plenty of time to ponder all sorts of things. I’d spent days on end turning over that evening in my head, wondering if I’d done the right thing. Realizing that my sister’s death wasn’t my fault was good, it had made me happy… but had the trauma been the only thing keeping me from becoming a killer? I’d let the ghouls take those women away to be eaten… and I’d nearly become friends with their leader as well.

And the reikverratr had mentioned someone, “the Witch,” who wanted me alive. A Cassandran who knew me as an individual, who had specifically requested that I be brought to her. Was she the one I’d heard when I first arrived here, the one who’d been supplying Nemesis with her equipment?

It had also begun to stick out to me more and more that my own hallucinations were calling me “Emma” now. I’d only been using the name for a couple of months, and only out of pragmatism. Emma wasn’t the real me, she was an identity, something I’d created to enmesh myself with Selene, a cover story about a strange girl whose past had been wiped away by brain fever.

So why was I becoming so comfortable being Emma?

I wasn’t going to be able to answer any of those questions. But hopefully if I could get to that rooftop and sit down next to the Blackbird and actually fucking talk to her, she’d be able to answer at least one.

It turned out that the Blackbird was sitting on the roof of a small train shed, currently storing two empty flatbed cars. I had to circle around to the side to find the one area where the roof sagged low enough for me to jump onto it. The Blackbird was on the other side. 

A wave of anxiety hit me before I could cross the rooftop, making me slow down. It was a stupid, pointless anxiety, given that the Blackbird had already saved my life somewhere between two and three times by that point, but the fear that she’d run away or try to attack me or something could not be banished by something so simple as “logic.” So I slowed down, turned my jog across the tin roof into more of a leisurely saunter. And that’s probably the only reason why the Blackbird didn’t hear my footsteps approaching. 

When I crested the highest point of the roof, the Blackbird was still sitting by the edge, facing away from me. Over her shoulder, I could clearly see the object held in her right hand. Not that I believed it at first. I took a few steps closer just to be sure. The closer I came, the more familiar it became, and the more sure I was that I could believe my own eyes. My breath caught in my throat and my eyes went wide, my whole nervous system rebelling at the obvious and inevitable conclusion. It could not have possibly been who I was beginning to think it was, sitting there at the edge of the depot roof, and yet…

The Blackbird was holding in her hand an oversized brass pocket watch. It was half-open, and she was slowly prodding and manipulating its many hands, as she had made a habit of doing when I’d first gotten to know her.

“Joyce?” I said, my voice weak. “…Alonhall?”

She leapt to her feet in an instant, slamming the pocket watch closed and replacing it in some hidden pocket of her clothing as she wheeled around to face me. “Well, bugger me with an ice axe,” she said. “Sorry for keeping it a secret, Emma. Darling.”

And then Alonhall threw herself off of the rooftop, fifteen feet to the ground. By the time I reached the edge, she was already out of sight.

I HAVE BEEN WAITING TO DO THAT REVEAL FOR AN ENTIRE BOOK AND A HALF. I mean, who knew that the woman who never mentioned having a job, but who constantly told stories about being a badass secret agent, was actually a badass secret agent, right?I eagerly await all the people in the comments pointing out all of the other fascinating foreshadowing that I wrote into the first book.
Now, as for my future plans: Selene is going to be going on hiatus for a little while. After the end of NaNoWriMo, which I aim to complete this year, I will be turning my attention entirely to completing my other ongoing novel, The Earthborn Emissary, which will require me to work on it to the exclusion of anything else. Then, in January, I'll be having bottom surgery, which will make it more or less impossible to work on anything for at least a few weeks. I don't know exactly when I'll be working on the next Selene book. My guess is that I'll start releasing chapters again some time around April, but I can't guarantee that, because it's based on my recovery time, which is extremely variable. Keep a look-out on my Patreon for more updates; I'll be sure to release any updates to all, not just for patrons. That's all for now. Two books down, two to go, and the title of the third book in the Selene series is Wolves of Selene. So thank you all for supporting me, and I hope you enjoyed the reading.

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