As I looked around, everyone was looking at me suspiciously. The man who was only strapped to the tree for a bit seemed to be more concerned with the general direction Tia had run off to, but the guy who’s wrist was injured seemed more fearful of me.

 

The thing that really hurt though was seeing the way Eirlathion was looking at me now. He was looking at me as though I had just sprouted an extra head. It was a look of someone who had no idea what he was looking at, or how he was supposed to interact with the strange creature in front of him. Somehow, that hurt the most. Seems like I have somehow really grown to care about what he thinks.

 

With all of the attacking dark elves now dead, the noise in this area had changed a great deal. Not everyone was aware that the threat was over quite yet, so people seemed to be organizing into some kind of search sweep of the village. They probably suspected more assassin-type fighters. However, a lot of the people who had been stationed in sniping positions up on the trees were now coming down to join in the search parties. A few even seemed to be getting closer in to this area.

 

My eyes that can see in this darkness as though it is daylight easily caught sight of Tia’s return well before anyone else. Fortunately, she got done with her business quickly. This is good. I would like to get the risky stuff over with before there are too many extra eyes on us. She looked like a genuine sight out of some horror movie. A toddler with blood running down her chin from her mouth and staining over half the front of her white dress. It was probably a good thing it was dark here.

 

“Tia!” I called out to her and waved her over to me. I looked over my shoulder in consideration for a moment before deciding to give her instructions in English. “I now you are carrying it in your mouth. Turn so that you are facing away from everyone and spit it into your hands, then act like you are chanting something. After that, I’ll take it. Try to make yourself look tired, and then go over and take a seat leaning up against Nymph’s tree.”

 

She nodded and then immediately turned herself at an angle that would make it difficult for anyone to see what her hands were doing as she brought them up to her chin. I was the only one with an angle to see her spitting a mouthful of blood into her cupped hands.

 

“Mmm… I call upon the name of my honored mother, holy goddess of healing Ninisina. Grant onto me the sacred power to relieve all wound and comfort those in need of care.”

 

As she said this rather convincing prayer that I might believe having been a real prayer she may have heard raised to her mother in her previous life, she also raised her hands into the air. After this, she staggered about and really looked like she was about to drop the liquid that was in her hands. Some of it even leaked out over her finger tips.

 

“Asa!” She called out to me with an urgent seeming tone. I ran over and she held out her hands. [Here.] She offered her hands to me, speaking in elven this time. I cupped my hands obediently and she poured the thick red sticky fluid into my care. [I… I’m sorry, I need to go sit down.] She said.

 

I watched her stagger off toward the tree like she really was affected a great deal. Jeeze. What great acting. If I hadn’t been the one who just literally told her to do exactly this, I might even be convinced by it.

 

Ok, focus. I gotta keep what I’m doing in mind. Gotta win back some points with the people here. First, I can’t have them getting a good enough look in my hands to identify this mysterious liquid is actually blood.

 

[Nymph, please stay back. You’ve already done enough damage here.] I said, looking up at Nymph with a glair. Of course I did still think she’d gone too far, but more to the point, I didn’t want the light from her projection allowing anyone to see too much.

 

[What? Asa! I was… I was just trying to protect you! You don’t know what kinds of things these people say about you! Some of them even…]

 

[Nymph!] I try cut her off.

 

[No, Asa! You don’t have to help him!]

 

"Yes I do! I have to help him because YOU are the one who hurt him, Ok? I have to help him because you hurt him because of me! That’s why I have to help him! Because you took actions that were way too rash, now me and Tia have to take responsibility for your actions! You need to think before you do things!"

I was really shouting at her, seriously shouting with anger in my tone. I switched to English in order to be more articulate with my words, but because I had switched back to English that also made it rather clear I was not just saying this as a part of some act. I did not care about whether or not our audience understood what I was saying, I was not saying this for their benefit. It was my real thoughts.

 

Nymph, whether she actually understood this or not, seemed very hurt by this. I heard an actual groaning from the tree behind me. Something about it seemed to get smaller, it was like the tree itself was showing the depression of the spirit which dwelled inside it. Her light avatar of course also looked plenty depressed, her shoulders drooped and she looked toward the ground. It really looked like she was about to cry. That’s just a projection though, something like a hologram or something. The tree is her real body. Can she actually cry?

 

[I’m going to use this to heal him now.] I said as I turned my back on Nymph and walked up to the guy still clutching his broken arm.

 

As I approached, the guy suddenly seemed extra terrified. He flopped backward onto his but and tried to scurry away from me.

 

[Ahh… no!] The man said. [The… the tree spirit is right! You don’t need to help me! I… I am a bad person, please!] He said.

 

I was stunned at this man’s reaction. What was he saying?

 

[It… it was me who was wrong! I deserve the injury I got from the tree spirit!] The man continued.

 

[No! It was Nymph who was wrong! She shouldn’t have hurt you! You just wanted to help Eirlathion!] I argued back. [Tia just made this to heal you! We’re trying to help!] I said, offering my hands forward.

 

[Nnn… no! Then, all the more reason why I can’t accept that.] The man said. [I cannot accept something that made her that tired. You… That’s right! You should use it for the surgery Master Eirlation needs! He needs to remove that arrow head from his chest still, right?]

 

He’s really desperate not to be healed with this, huh? The reason for it was obvious though. Frustrating, but even a blind man could see what was going on here.

 

[Why are you so scared of Nymph?] I asked, and I was surprised at how genuinely miserable my tone sounded. [Nymph! Tell him he can let me heal him!] I demanded, turning back to Nymph’s tree body. It was only the tree body. I hadn’t realized it, but at some point she had dismissed her light projection. It was nowhere to be seen.

 

[Nymph!] I demanded again, but I got only silence as a response. Instead, Eirlathion seemed to finally arrive at a decision and started walking toward me. He knelt down beside me and immediately winced as his hand raised up to his chest around the area he had previously been hit by the arrow. He quickly suppressed that pained expression though and put his hand on my shoulder.

 

[It is fine, Asaren. I can heal him later. I’m sorry, but, can I get a bottle for you to put the healing potion Tiaren made in?]

 

I didn’t make any kind of immediate response, I just looked down at the ground a little. This situation was really not developing in the direction I had hoped at all. Then again, hardly any of it had. This was all just a bad situation, and I was struggling just to keep up.

 

A jaded side of me had the audacity to realize that things were probably going better than I had expected for the sake of my real objective, to downplay any kind of perceived threat that we posed in favor of making me and Tia look sympathetic and genuinely wanting to help. I hated the part of me that had noticed those things.

 

I genuinely hated the fact that this part of me seemed almost happy the guy had refused to be healed. I wanted to help this guy, and having my attempts to help him denied like this made me feel like someone had reached inside of me and removed my stomach. It felt like there was just a cold void in the area around my solar plexus.

 

Sometime while I was lost in my thoughts, Eirlathion had moved back over to Nymph’s tree body. It seemed like she was more than glad to provide him with a small wooden bottle and a funnel. When Eirlathion offered it to me, I obediently poured the fluid from my hands into the bottle. After that, I stared at the blood that was all over my hands.

 

The sight of that blood reminded me. I had killed today. I was responsible for the deaths of at least two of the attackers who I had tripped and placed in a position where they were easy pickings for the defenders of the village. After that, I had personally sent out the magic that killed two others directly. 

 

I was responsible for the deaths of four people. Tia had personally killed three. I’m guessing this is not the first time she has killed someone. However, it’s a different story for me. I’ve been in a few confrontations, but all of those were handled with a subdual hold, one of which involved disarming the man of the knife he’d been wielding. Before today, I’d never even given someone a serious injury before. Now, I’m responsible for the deaths of four people.

 

I still haven’t processed what that means just yet. It was a battle. If Tia and I hadn’t killed those seven between us, more of the people of this village would have died. These were enemies, and they definitely deserved the death they got.

 

That was not me trying to comfort myself. In fact, I was maybe more disturbed by the fact that I didn’t need to justify it to myself at all. I didn’t feel too bad about it. Rather, that’s the exact thing that was disturbing me. I didn’t feel bad about it. I had also had the presence of mind to realize my actions were almost perfect for selling my intended image, and went even better than what I’d originally planned.

 

Both of these things, they completely disgusted me. These hands that were stained with blood, a blood that acted as a healing medicine that had gone unused. It was as though they were screaming at me I’d failed as a healer and succeeded as a killer, and I was disgusted.