‘Ah, that was good. Didn’t even break a sweat.’
Ha! Neither did I.
We both feel a lot more relaxed after a few thousand fights. I’m feeling a bit competitive since he’s one win ahead of me right now, but that’s all.
‘Hey, the bet of the last best of ten was control over the sonar, hand it over.’
Here. So far I’ve lost sole privilege over the blueprints, the battery but gained the right eye. There’s been much back and forth, especially of the mouth, but it’s with him for now.
‘It’s great neither of us are sore losers. Finally, so many details I can’t get bored.
You’re really going all out with the sonar, but yeah, this is fun. You will be bored again soon enough, you know what never gets old? Beating you up, next I want to bet the WiFi access for both the arms.
‘Take it slow~. Let’s not begin with the big bets yet. How about control of the pinky for shared thermoregulation?’
Time doesn’t seem to go faster, but we don’t mind. The sonar stretches for a kilometer in all directions. The detection level is atomic and we made a game, guess the electron, for guessing the position and speed of electrons of a few random atoms around. I wanted to make bets over it too, but he called it unfair just because I would always guess right.
‘This forest sure used to be scary huh? We haven’t run into a single monster even after leaving the Ents’ groove.’
Creeps me out. It’s full of shriveling carnivorous plants, but not a single fly or magic beast in sight. Not even invisible ones or animals that you would expect had evolved to live here. According to the logs they relied on attracting a large influx of beasts twice every year and fully digesting them through the seasons. Most were the nearby dungeon bumpkins who didn’t know any better.
‘Anything interesting on the way to the dungeon?’
There’s an isolated snake people tribe a little to the north after we get out of this forest and into the jungle.
‘For real!? I fully expected you to talk about a physics defying snail or something.’
You mean to say I am boring? What’s boring about a magic snail? Whatever, I think this is a good opportunity to get some clothes.
‘Oh yeah, I forgot we were still naked.’
Technically we aren’t, neither our nipples nor genitals are showing.
‘But that’s ’cuz we don’t have them. Don’t try to trick the system, we are naked.’
About tricking the system, we are still written as outsiders.
‘Changing our stats will alert the admins right? Can’t Essay solve this? Could she like, create an editable status screen and make it available to us? The gods don’t understand the code of the system, just it’s function right? I’m sure that they are more like end users by their level of incompetence.’
The magIc god should understand, i think.
SA-02. Here’s a function I would like you to add to the system. Is this possible without alerting the admins?
“Should the use of this function also not alert the administrators?”
SA-02. Yes, please.
“Done.”
‘Neat. H4xx0r onee-chan best girl.’
SA-02. Thanks.
Agreed.
‘Can she make new functions for altering stuff in the world that doesn’t bother the overworked staff?’
Be content with our fake id. This is a second status screen, our actual status and info are still that of an outsider. There’s no change to the world, only that anyone that has any of the skills or items for looking at someone’s stats will receive our fake id for their request instead of our real one. Let’s be careful about never meeting the god of magic.
‘OK. What should be our race? Greek sex offender?’
You mean sex offender greek statue.
‘Great.’
… You actually did it...
‘Fight it out to change?’
I was legitimately worried about us getting into big trouble for this. But he was only playing around and the fights were fun even if he let me win the last one by falling on his own while trying to hump the air and rub his nonexistent nipples. I had thought it was a tactic to make me lose for leaving the arena, I almost did.
High golem. The easiest to pretend to be, an ancient race of self-aware constructs.
‘These sound rare, are there enough of them that the gods won’t try track us down to the time of our creation?’
Oopsie. After a search of a few minutes, I find a suitable deactivated golem to which I change my status to. It exhausted all its power overworking itself as per its creator last order and then slaying an uninvited dragon, the cave complex later collapsed. It could be easily powered with magic if it wasn’t so deep into a mountain.
‘F.’
F. I finish copying all skills
‘Identity theft successful. That’s some great job bro, now we will no longer be responsible for our crimes!’
… Let me just ask Essay to change the system to answer the request for the current location of something with the fake ids by default. If the gods ever search for that golem our location will be the one showing.
‘I feel so vulnerable in this open camp. Even though those tigers can’t even scratch me, I feel so exposed.’
That’s because you’re almost a shut-in. We can safely ignore those magic beasts as we smell of rock to them. It would be great to harvest their magic crystals, but we don’t have where to store them. North from here is the village.
‘Are we going for real?’
You don’t want to?
‘I thought you would be against it.’
We have a fake id, even if they had someone who could see our status there’s nothing out of the usual for them.
‘A jogging naked Olympian statue with the halves of a log of pure mana on its shoulders is nothing out of the usual for you? This is well beyond socially acceptable lumber sexual, get a hold of yourself man.’
Should we have a title? Dragon Slayer would fit the narrative, but it would draw too much attention.
‘How about, ‘Unarmed but dangerous’?’
Hard worker is the least conspicuous of that golem’s titles, we will go with that.
‘What will happen if a god finds out the part of the world log where we simply appear in that forest from the inside of an ancient civilizations ruins? Can we just bluff our way through it saying it was the will of a higher god that we were brought away from those ruins? If they have some sort of a lie detector, we won’t even be lying like this.’
I love how you bring up a problem, and I’m like holy crap we are done but then you casually hand out the solution.
‘Teehee.’
The tiger-like bears growl at us from a distance but don’t approach. At our lack of response and constant speed soon they go back to sleep, scratch their stripped brown fur against a solitary tree or just laze around. There’s one looking intensely at a water stream, I think it’s fishing.
‘Sabers tear through the water,
jaws opening wounds on the face
and flowing tears of time's father,
leaving only blades in their place.
Blades of water slash one another,
closing their wounds with new ones.
Forth bursts a nervous laughter,
a blue salmon leaving the river alone.
As the blue salmon bleeds over the flow of time,
I realize this camera doesn't need impostor syndrome.’
The fluttering of wings, from bird songs to cicada cries on the many water particles floating and trembling to their violent tune, speak of my heated. The jungle looks hard to move in, but there’s an animal trail that will make it easier for us. Just watch out for the logs not to hit anything.
‘We are here already?’
Yeah, deep in the jungle is quite dangerous. There’s a dragon nest there and a lot of stuff that can kill them off easily. They are not doing very well here, with a quick look I can see they have recently been attacked by magic beasts. It was slightly beneficial because now they no longer have a food shortage, but most of their people are injured and half the warriors incapacitated.
‘Maybe we should tell them we cleared the forest from the toxic magic, they can try to live there instead. They should have enough time to heal up and rebuild before the beasts notice the forest is safe. And i always wanted to do this.’
“We come in peace!”
A scout distracted by anxiety only noticed us after the shout. The slit of its eyes closed vertically and then expanded well beyond the globe, popping out in surprise as it’s jaw clamped shut it’s forked tongue still out. It immediately darted back in the direction of the village, lower half moving through the jungle ground in a single flow. After noticing we were following, it went a roundabout way.
‘So, hmm… can we speak their language?’
Yes. Here.
‘Neat. Ah, he’s too far already, if we shout again we might draw unwanted attention.’
Lots of it. Let’s just head straight over to the village. Leave the logs on the ground here, they will get in the way.
‘I didn’t think he would be so scared. They must be under a lot of pressure.’
Just tell them about the cleaning of the forest, ask for clean furs and go.
‘Cold.’
On the way out we can draw away the tiger-bears or hunt them.
‘Yeah, that’s cool, they looked quite strong, I don’t think these guys can defeat them while carrying the injured.’
A wooden stake encirclement marks the village. It’s in good shape except for one part that was smashed to bits. A mammoth with two extra trunks instead of tusks had sent it all flying.
‘It was the kind of thing you’d see everyday back in our hometown.’
Metaphorically speaking. We gotta talk to the chief or the shaman, everyone else will probably not know to react or can’t help us.
‘I like how they hollowed out trees and then built around them, with the logs from other trees making the huts look like obese magic trees.’
It’s less of camouflage and more of a useful cover, the vIllage would be vulnerable to eagles as a clearing. The dragons see it as a sign of respect too, they would be attacked if they didn’t live within trees. Also, change of plans, there’s a girl i need you to pay attention to.
“WE COME IN PEACE!”
Closing in on the busy villagers, I shout again, this time in the snake tongue. Our synthesizer matches to perfection the hissing tones of their language. The clarity in our voice should be easier to understand than when they talk among themselves. Of course they were startled, looking behind us and around the village for signs of the “WE”.
‘We should have thought this out a little bit more. Why are some of these guys prostrating?’
I did, you’re the one who didn’t listen, sort this out. Good luck, I’m out.
‘Wait, wait! We are in this together!’
“Aspect of metal, what brings you to our home?”
The chief answered without faltering. He had been hesitant after looking through our stats, but seeing those who prostrated a courage out of fear of losing his position.
Before Me could speak some nonsense, the shaman interjected. The scowl of a snake was on his face for a second, disappearing right before he turned to me.
“Most welcome messenger! Please allow this speaker for the gods to offer a feast on your name. Come hither with us, eat our food and sleep on a bed on the chief’s hall. Then do tell us of this most u- important business you have with us!”
“No need.”
‘Or should we? This old man wants us to stay the night to protect them.’
Thanks captain obvious. Sort it out, don’t forget to ask about the feathered girl.
‘I never thought it would be this awkward to talk to people. Then again most MCs I read weren’t living statues.’
“I come only to ask for fur... and to tell you that the devouring forest is no longer a threat. You can safely move there, I can also help you get through the…”
Guraj.
“Guraj plains.”
A wave of shock spread over the people and the wide-eyed chief did not stop them from prostrating. This is so awkward. The shaman ran to a figure of a monkey sculpted in wood on a small altar, mumbling to it words of gratitude. Others followed him while the chief’s son brought over the uncured fur of the mammoth that had attacked the village. They had sacrificed it’s fat to the gods, I guess he thinks I’m here for the rest of it.
It’s good they know golems are servants, they don’t talk directly to me but to who they think are my masters. The chief’s son was still head bowed, offering the large pelt with the help of three subordinates, when the shaman came around to getting me to help with something else.
“Your words are little, but they change the lives of our people forever! Please do tell us, how can we help this fur reach your master in sacrifice?”
‘Ehhh…’
“Actually, I want something to wear myself.”
This only gets worse.
“Please! You don’t have to give me your own clothes!?”
I’m done checking the girl, she is a step in the mutation from the snakes into the birds. This shouldn’t have happened really, they are the reptiles that increased their mental capacities, unlike the runners who gradually grew wings. Her few feathers grow between her scales full body, but because of the scales there’s no way for the feathers to come out, they are just like ingrown hair. Her beak is so sad... it must hurt so much... it’s cutting through her mouth because it has no place there.
‘Magic world. Magic suffering.’
“How could a slave of the gods hide his shame, when their chosen messenger exposes his in blinding honesty?”
“Yes, yes I will wear it now, DON’T follow the old man! Keep your clothes on!”
We gotta do something man. Her eyes can see in the distance like a bird and infra-red like a snake. That is if they weren’t getting in each other’s way and making her blind.
“Show me the feathered girl.”
A silence like a dry swallow echoed in the village. Then like the sound of writing and brushing away on a plaster wall, sighs of relief mixed with stifled cries of sorrow.
“We… I. Will prepare her for the altar of Halka’an. She was never initiated since she can’t see, but since you have come for her soul, please give her the comfort we couldn’t. Here and afterwards.”
‘We are not-?’
No. Let’s hope post level up healing can help her, tell them we are going to heal her. Let’s beat up the magic beasts on the way and make her finish them, true isekai harem power leveling. Like the sound of that?
‘No need to try to convince me, bro.’
“No sacrifice. Just bring me to her, I might be able to help.”
This was starting to lose me. But this instantly brought my attention back.
Damn, I feel bad just hearing about her condition
So now we gonna have a snake? bird? loli...
Yup. You read the poem i linked? She's an aspect of Quetzalcoatl, not part of the novel but that's what i see in her. i'm itching to give spoilers. I've been trying to keep things light hearted but that scene just hit me so hard. I actually wanted to edit it out but instead i felt like writing up to her healing and here we go.