Alice sat out on the terrace of a town cafe, enjoying a cup of tea and a slice of cake. The sun was shining, a pleasant cooling breeze blowing through the air, and the couple on the table next to her were discussing how the Slandhaile kingdom's first prince had been passed over for the throne after some sort of hushed up scandal. All in all a perfect day. Not that she'd been trying to get Raymond punished in particular; she had just wanted to cause enough of a mess that by the time anyone figured out that the whole scheme was actually just a glorified escape plan they wouldn't realistically be able to come after her.
She wondered what Emily thought when she found out the person she was conspiring with to frame Alice was in fact Alice herself. It must have been a real shocker. Maybe no-one had ever told her, and she was living in blissful ignorance. No rumours of Emily's fate had reached this far. Alice had crossed several countries, swapping out disguises and methods of transportation as she went, to ensure no-one from her previous life could find her here. Although she had needed to stop walking or riding between cities alone, after becoming concerned that someone would be able to follow the trail of dead bandits. It was amazing how many otherwise normal travellers seemed willing to stoop to robbery when passing by a lone girl.
There were no rumours of Alice herself either, or the rest of her family. Once they worked out that she had orchestrated the whole thing herself her family would lose any leverage they had over the king, but it was unlikely that they would be punished on her behalf either.
Her snack finished, Alice stood and returned to the bakery that had taken her on, happy with her new and simpler life. Queen Isabelle would no doubt consider it a complete waste of talent. Then again if the queen could see people as 'people' rather than collections of skills then Alice wouldn't have had to flee in the first place. Alice had her new life here, well away from expectations and politics, and was determined to enjoy it fully.
And that's the end of the story. I've read a bunch of not-really-a-villainess type stories where the alleged villainess wants to get banished, but in many of these stories they seem rather passive about the whole thing. They just sit around and let it happen as the actually-evil heroine convinces every last boy in the school how bad the 'villainess' is, usually just by being very pretty and crying a lot. This short story came out of the question 'What if the villainess was a bit more proactive, and actually conspired with the heroine to arrange her own banishment?' Lots of plot holes happen, it turns out. (Just how did Alice convince a body double to admit to treason in front of so many witnesses anyway? That could have gone soooo badly wrong...)
But plot holes aside, I had fun writing it, and I think I got a reasonable amount of personality into the characters for a short story. The ending went through a couple of variations. In the original, Emily ended up nunneried and Raymond ended up dead, but I think this no-one-really-wins-or-loses ending fits the theme of the story a bit better. Also, my proofreader tells me that 6 year old Alice is the best Alice. I've promised that my next story that involves humans will have more 6 year olds.
I enjoyed this but I agree that more of an epilogue would be good. Maybe do a time skip as one of the characters introduces the situations the others are in or have faced in the last _years.
Eg, Alice runs a bakery empire because someone raided her suppliers and now she can't get good sugar so she solved the problem, the cause and the motivation; then hired the people she wanted who didn't cross her bottom line, but she still makes bread every Tuesday...
;p I was just playing with that one but seriously 5 years or so? Married, kids and does Edward still adore Emily?
I think you've written a wonderous story.
The one thing which wasn't portrayed well enough for me is that Alice actually wants this.
Also, the only chapter I put a heart on was 6-year old Alice chapter because those couple paragraphs about "the higher you go in social rank the weirder the clothes you gotta wear so heaven help me I don't want to be a queen" were great.
I wouldn't have wanted to read a much longer version of this story, however. Perhaps a longer Epilogue or whatever aside, the succinctness of the chapters is what makes it possible to keep the facts of the story in mind when trying to think along with the plot. Stretching the plot would have made it gone on for longer and would have made it harder to follow along.
I didn't know who Lucy was until Denis's perspective.
I think I ran out of feedback. I liked the story a lot.
Thanks for the feedback. I'm glad you enjoyed the story.
@cathfach
(Just how did Alice convince a body double to admit to treason in front of so many witnesses anyway? That could have gone soooo badly wrong...)
Not Hard at all really Just need to do it through a Proxy and hire someone that hated her Father and offered Enough Gold and a Blond Wig. Seeing how he treated maids my guess it was very easy. She had Years so it could been made of her own Hair.
I would of Enjoyed seeing her as an Adventure but it was Cool!
bruh... I was smirking throughout the entire read. Absolutely beautifully done
Coming for a lone dungeon,
That was really good!!
Thanks for your writing!!
Keep it up!!
I must go find that patreon something now :P
The ending went through a couple of variations.
Could you post the endings as additional chapters?
In the original, Emily ended up nunneried and Raymond ended up dead, but I think this no-one-really-wins-or-loses ending fits the theme of the story a bit better.
This ending seems to me the most realistic, because in self-defense courses they carefully explain that a street fight takes place "not according to the rules."
So, due to the fact that the street fight takes place "not according to the rules", a lot of masters of sports in wrestling find themselves in street fights simply killed because of the mistakes they make, which means that Alice in the battle with the road bandits would most likely be robbed , well, rape, murder and sale into slavery are options.
But this part is not realistic for you:
She tapped at a tiny button, well hidden in the decoration on the underside of the table. "Very well. The current prime suspect for the framing of Alice Sandoval is... Alice Sandoval."
Given that from the outside, the arrest of the Sandoval family would look like an attempt to refuse to compensate for the insult inflicted on this family by Raymond, in reality the Queen would not have done this, just the compensation awarded would have been more modest.
Thanks for the story!
The plot holes do kind of make sense, with such a messy scheme and the Royals not wanting to investigate further since it would only make the situation for them worse; parts being missing in the end is kind of expected.
this was fun, thanks!
Enjoyable and my thanks for the tale.