Chapter 12 - Twelve Strings of Lights

I wasn't going to go looking for it though, if it was anything more than a crazy mix of anxiety about what happened to all our bodies, a weirdly-positioned Bogart cut-out standee, and the rantings of some paranormal freak on Twitter. A little kid dressed as a ghost, with a grass pattern to his sheet as his pirate friend kept trying to stab him with a plastic sword, was enough of a distraction from all that.

Lacy had the Halloween lights out and set in a neat pile on the porch. She had a different outfit on, one I remembered wearing a few times, than the damp stuff from before. It looked as good on me as I would expect it to. She also had slipped on a rugged pair of gloves and had a set for me in grandma's size, which was as close to fitting as we were going to get for something like this. The cleaning gloves in the upstairs bathroom would've been excessive.

Some of the nails that used to hold the lights in place were worn by the last year or bent. Using a hammer and some fresh nails, Lacy made the needed adjustments. It was hard to mistake her smile in the language of my features. I still did plenty to assist, but she was in charge. Granted, she didn't have an innate understanding of my body, so she had to be gentle with the hammer and when stepping up high on the ladder. A few, curious on-lookers stopped in front of the house but didn't get too close.

"How is everyone doing?"

Her question sounded like the kind of things I might ask when checking in on Lacy. Propping up the weight of a bundle of lights, I answered, "Some stuff was said about life, love, and what it means to be little kids with a twist, but they're both the grandparents we know. And I found the hair stuff and grandpa looks cute."

Feeding Lacy more of the lights, she wanted to know if I took some pictures. I hadn't. In fact, I wasn't even certain where I had left her purse and phone. Probably still in her room.

I'd get them later. Lacy had my phone and wallet, and I ceded authority of them to her. The lights were mostly movie poster or theater style with a bright, pale-yellow tone for what was supposed to go around the door. Orange and green twinkle lights went around the main windows like a disassembled pumpkin. The regular outdoor lights just cast around a general area at night before getting lost in the nooks and crannies.

Lacy returned to her question, pressing that I hadn't mentioned how I was doing. What could I possibly say that I hadn't said as she gobbled up cookies I couldn't eat? I was her in the most intimate ways. I had her underwear on and it was meant for body parts I...possessed. Shallow reflections of self were what was saving me from the vivid storm of sensations that threatened to drown me earlier. Still, I would have to pee eventually.

"The best I can manage for right now. Also, you should go first. Take them up the street while there's still some twilight and I'll take them down towards the center of town with a little more light from the main roads and more people. Sound good?"

She remarked, "You'll be alone in a little bit then. And out later."

"There's no perfect way to give candy away and have a night out. You just be safe with them."

Calmly, she turned my face on me and bowed it with a radiant smile. Before I could ask about that, she explained, "I often gush about you online to random strangers but whenever they ask what it is that makes you so special, words fail me. I just wish I could save this exact moment, so everyone could know. They probably still wouldn't get it though."

I was a little lost myself. It wasn't as though I'd done anything particularly heroic lately but stare at a spooky shadow and assist in hanging lights. Though I was taking the harsher path with being alone as the sun set, Lacy would be alone late and facing stuff I couldn't protect her from.

As well, in her own body, there wasn't as much I could do. Not that my mediocre form inspired fear outside of a white suit. Lacy had deadly nipple pokes and an adventurous enthusiasm along with a determination to do things. As me, I knew she was even stronger and better.

I just wanted it to be the lesson of one night she could take back to herself and use to improve. Maybe our grandparents could also take some measure of youth back with them for the joys of a painless decade or two to follow. And me...I could always be a better cousin, be around her more, be less afraid of my father and see my mother more for all she'd done to encourage me to be close to my grandparents and cousin.

And I could feed the real Riona a banana while she held her daughter's baby clothes so she could...no. That assumed she or my father could actually learn something about empathy. That was a lost cause. And it didn't matter. They could know the exact pain they caused us and still make the willful choice to let us suffer the worst of them.

With all the lights up and the colored ones especially, I felt swamped by the glow when Lacy switched them on. The area felt so inviting and even standing out here didn't feel all that intimidating with how easily the night enveloped Lacy's body. I wasn't out there alone yet, but one step at a time.

It didn't take long after that till the dryer-hot costumes were ready to be worn. Lacy finished her food and more as I finally managed to clean my plate and feel a little better. Grandpa had to be dragged away from her little controller after the hopes of one more match to even things with grandma were denied. Pairing up again in the same way as before, I had to gingerly disrobe grandpa with every care given for her mound of carefully-collected hair.

She looked rather ornate for an inspector with those locks under her cap. The ensemble was completed with a little flashlight for walking around and a prop magnifying glass. As she recited all the lines grandpa liked to wield with as many sparkles in her eyes, I finally found the certainty to embrace her in a way Lacy likely never would.

This put Lacy's breasts in an awkward position until I opted to duck down. Grandpa calmly turned and wrapped his arms around me as he would do for Lacy whenever she needed it, without a care or an unnecessary concern.

For about the nth time, I went through the mental motions of how I might phrase a confession to the fact I was not the genuine Lacy but a copy holding her place while she adored whatever she found so special about being me. As with most times before, it didn't get past the first few words of the notion before I set it aside to continue filling this role.

I further wondered if they had secretly figured out who we were from the nuances of our voices and demeanors. Probably not. Grandpa was an entertainer, a clever man, and an amateur detective but knew we got enough questions and stress from our supposedly-closest family to save such notions for fun. And grandma, while a sharp teacher whose students didn't get much past her, also was able to turn it off when it came to home and worry more about whether we were well and had full bellies.

Even as I ate, she leaned away from competition with her husband to make sure we didn't want anything added to what we were eating. For me, getting through all the chicken had been a pleasure to start, but I had overshot the expectations of the depth of Lacy's stomach and she hadn't yet found the bottom of the one she was growing into. But it seemed she got tired of eating eventually.

Downstairs, grandma made for a glamorous cowboy, like a singer from decades past when people still cared about cowboys. Their candy bags were no fancier than some trash bags. Lacy, as I expected, wore my karate outfit and made sure she had the brightest light around to illuminate the route. My phone had an optional flashlight but had been dimming, along with the rest of the technology within.

"We'll be less than an hour, then we trade, and I'll hold down the fort here for you."

One by one, they left out the screen door and I waved. When they were finally off, I did something that my grandparents only did when they went to bed, I shut the door behind the screen and latched it securely. I didn't lock it, because this felt excessive enough.

At the front, I caught up to them with another wave as I ruffled Lacy's poofy orange skirt. A group of kids with a pair of adults walking behind them greeted me without the need to come all the way up to the door to ring the bell.

Ducking inside, I stretched over the fridge to grab the bowl. Each kid got a nice handful as I waved them away from the "purely decorative" bananas. The one with a prison outfit and raccoon-dark shadowed eyes took a long time to dig through the bowl before he realized no special secrets awaited him at the bottom. I considered taking some photos, but things happened so fast with the next group following immediately after.

It wasn't until after a few rounds of this that I actually managed to get a breather. For all the visitors, they had only put a small dent in the bowl. Adjusting the bananas, I squinted at what they lay atop and scrutinized the candy. The foil-like packaging glinted as the lights twinkled. It almost looked like it had a tint that hadn't been there before, even as I stood under the more-neutral lights that wrapped around the front door.

Picking out a random piece of store candy to inspect against the light did nothing to help resolve things one way or the other. It looked like all the rest. The bananas, however, were clear aberrations of nature. Still, I held myself back from eating any of it. We didn't need more complications.

After using as much light as was available to me, I resolved that none of the candy looked any different than it had when I first bought it. Taking advantage of the lull with the front door latched, I set the candy bowl on the main table, flicked on an extra, rarely-used light, and switched the television feed back to cable.

A show from a few years ago about a weird Indiana family had already started and it was themed around Halloween. Sprawling across the couch, I recalled my little dream of settling under one of Lacy's tiny blankets with her smaller body and carefully trudged up the steps to grab one from the hallway closet.

Dragging it down, I halted and surveyed as much of the house as I could see from a few steps up. Something immediately felt off. It wasn't anything I could see, but a feeling that traced along my back like someone's finger on the verge of grazing me. A shiver brought up all of Lacy's silvery hairs to porcupine-like alarm.