Saturday: December 28th
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"Bitch, I kinda miss you," Alice said. We were currently FaceTiming, which was weird because we don't ever talk over breaks. Usually, we sent memes to one another with the occasional text message, but never FaceTime. "Are you and Ethan dating yet?"

I rolled my eyes before saying, "I guess I miss you too. No, we are not dating. We haven't even known each other for a month. Why would we be dating?"

"Because you like him, and he clearly likes you back. I bet you guys will start dating right when we get back to school."

"Don't you have a boyfriend to annoy? Or a family?" I loved Alice, but I didn't need someone else picking on me about Ethan. I already had a family annoying me about him.

"Don't try to change the subject just because you know I'm right."

"I'm not going to date him now just to spite you," I said. She gave me a "really?" look. You know, the one moms give when you did something stupid. "Dating at the beginning of a semester might not be a smart idea. Plus, I haven't known him long, and most of the time I have known him, we have been across the country from one another."

"That's just a bunch of excuses. What is really bothering you?" Alice asked. She knew me all too well. I guess once you have lived with someone for a year and a half, they know how to read you.

"I'm scared. What if I'm not good enough for him? There are so many prettier and smarter girls than me. I don't want to get hurt again, nor do I want to hurt Ethan. He deserves so much better than me. I'm just the emotionally broken girl who watches too many movies and cartoons to make herself feel better."

"What brought this up?"

"He sent me a bunch of cute text messages saying how I was one of his favorite persons, how he wants to be a part of making me happy, and how he misses me. It was really cute, and I loved the texts. However, I started overthinking, and here we are."

"Have you talked to Ethan about it?"

"No, why would I?"

"Because Hailey, you don't want to end up going into a relationship with a ton of insecurities about it. You will constantly be second-guessing yourself, and it could make the relationship toxic. If you are open about it now, Ethan can help you figure out what you need to make sure you don't second-guess yourself. He wants to be there for you, and you need to let him."

I sighed, "But I don't want him to worry about me."

"This is what I'm talking about," Alice said. I groaned, knowing she was righting. "You need to talk about this with him today, or you are going to keep overthinking yourself to a broken heart. Ethan isn't your ex, and you are no longer the person you were two years ago. Don't let your past stop you from being happy."

"Did I mention how he said he really likes me and can't wait to tell me in person?"

Alice squealed," Marry that boy because he is doing everything right." I never expected Alice to squeal. I know she was all for Ethan and me, but still. She has never freaked out enough to make that noise.

"We aren't even dating."

"Well, date him and then marry him," Alice said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. I just rolled my eyes in response.

We spent the next hour catching up. She ranted about her family. I ranted about mine. We talked about what we got for Christmas. The basic conversations, until she had to leave to go to her boyfriend's family's Christmas. I forgot to ask why she called since we never talk over breaks. Something told me that she knew she needed to knock some sense into me. I was thankful for whatever that something was.

I spent hours trying to convince myself to talk to Ethan. Every time I think I have the courage to call him, I back down. I kept telling myself that I can fix it on my own. I didn't need to bug him. It was my problem, not his. It would eventually go away. However, if I couldn't call him, I could get Ethan to call me.

Hailey: Can we talk?

Ethan: Are you breaking up with me?

Before I could text him back, Ethan called me. As the phone rang, I could feel my nerves building up again. What if he didn't want to talk to me after? What if he ended up hating me? What if I wasn't good enough for him? What if he found someone better than me? I wasn't anywhere near the perfect girl for Ethan. He was handsome, smart, and athletic. I was just average. Any other girl would have been better for him than me.

"Hey," I said when I had the courage to answer the call.

"Are you okay?" Ethan asked. He was worried about me, and it made me smile. "You said we needed to talk. Did I do something wrong?"

"You didn't do anything wrong. This was a stupid idea. I shouldn't have made you call me."

"Hailey, what is bothering you? You can tell me."

I sighed, "I'm scared that you will find some girl who is better for you than me. You're practically perfect, and yet I am just me. There are so many more girls that are prettier, smarter, and more athletic than me. I'm still fighting to let someone date me because of my ex from two years ago. I'm not ready to be in a relationship, and what if by the time I am, you already moved on? I don't want you to get hurt because of my insecurities, and I don't want to be broken-hearted."

"Haily, do you want to know something?" Ethan asked. I didn't say anything, so he took it as a yes. "I chose you. I saw you so many times during the semester when you were leaving class, and I wanted to talk to you. I just didn't have the courage. When you ran into me the first time, I purposely bumped into you so that I could talk to you. After that, we kept running into one another. I have never been happier because I got to see and talk to you. Yes, you are nothing like other girls because no other girl caught my attention as you did. It took me almost a semester to try and talk to you. I can wait for you to decide that you are ready to date me. However, I'm going to constantly ask you to be my girlfriend until you are ready to say yes."

"Why me?" I asked.

Ethan smiled and said, " Because you thought you were invisible, but in all honesty, you stuck out to me. The girl who didn't want to attract attention to herself managed to attract me to her. You just had to be you, and I knew that we were meant to be together one day. I like you so much that I will wait as long as it will take for you to like me as much as I like you."

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