The overcast is bright and sunny once again here in the Supernal Skies of Serenity, reflecting that its Goddess has entered a more agreeable mood now that the uncomfortable tension has somewhat settled between us. I’m still nervous, sure, but I still have my wits about me, and I’m ready for just about anything that could occur, I think.

Luxy leads me to the center of the gazebo, where she raises a hand and constructs a table of light using her divine magic. On opposite ends of this table, she summons two very different-looking chairs. One is more of a throne. Tall and impending to look upon, it towers over the table with its glorious shimmering light, its ornate stylings, and its comfortable cushions.

The other chair is a rickety stool made of rough, splintery wooden planks. From the looks of it, putting some weight on the thing looks like it would destroy it right away. I have half a mind to steal the Goddess’s chair before she sits down, but I restrain myself from this wicked impulse.

I take my seat and find it sturdier than it looks while Luxy sits upon her extravagant throne of light. She smirks, crosses her legs, and looks down at me with an expression of superiority. “Do you like it? I thought I’d make you feel more at home.”

“The chair’s nice, but it just doesn’t have that overwhelming stench of failure that the rest of the Guild seems to have.”

“Your words, not mine,” The girl smiles and eyes my bottle of ambrosia without subtlety. “Are you going to have any of that for yourself? Personally, I wouldn’t. As a mortal, your taste buds would be ruined for the rest of your life.”

“I knew it...” I mutter softly under my breath. “No, I wasn’t planning on drinking any of this. It’s all for you.”

“Great!” She summons a napkin to wipe the obvious drool forming on her face. “I mean, uh, what do you want, then? Feel free to ask for anything.”

“Anything, you say?”

“Most anything. I can’t give you anything that’ll tip the odds in your favor, like a potion of immortality or some shit, but we’ll get to that soon enough.”

Interesting, I’ll have to remember that. As for my beverage of choice, I’ll throw Luxy an easy one to start off with. I recline in my rickety chair and cup my chin in my hands, telling her, “Give me my grandpa’s favorite drink,”

Lux Ultima looks at me with a puzzled expression before shrugging and snapping her fingers. At her command, a mug made of transparent light appears in front of me on the table. It soon fills with a fragrant and dark beer. Picking it up and lifting it to my lips, I take a deep swallow. Just from one taste, I can tell the Goddess was right on the mark. Not only is it my grandpa’s beloved Dry Dwarven Stout, but it’s also just about the best damn beer I’ve ever tasted.

“I’m sure you might have guessed by now, but I’m refraining from reading your mind during our discussion.” She says as she crosses her arms. “That being said, I must say... your attempt to gauge how much I know about you and your family was childish at best and infantile at worst.”

“I don’t have anything to say in response to that.” I lie.

Luxy blushes, slamming her fist down on the side of the throne. “I can tell when you’re lying, too, you dumbass! You were totally just thinking that I’m childish and infantile, weren’t you?!”

“Yes, absolutely.” I shrug my shoulders, seeing no point in lying.

The shining Goddess of Light takes a deep breath and closes her eyes. Trying to calm herself, exhales long and slow. “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that.”

As I take another sip of my beer, thoughts of the old man resurface. The scent of the dark liquid crowds the senses and reminds me of the many times I saw him nursing bottle after bottle of this very same beer in my childhood. “He’s not in your heavenly city over there somewhere, is he? My grandpa, I mean.”

Luxy stares at me blankly before her cheeks puff out from trying to hold back her laughter. Not long after, she fails. “Oh, FUCK no, I’m sorry, it’s just that that was just hilarious... he’s with my sister.”

“Mmn. I suppose that sounds about right. Not in one of the deeper Hells, I hope?”

“Nah, he’s in one of the fun ones, I think.” She tilts her head while trying to remember where my grandpa’s soul ended up after his death.

“Good. As flawed as the old man might have been, as far as I know, he didn’t do anything that warranted eternal punishment... but I suppose that’s up to your sister to decide.”

“Something like that,” The Goddess shrugs her shoulders. “I don’t really know how she does things these days... still, you do know that old man was a complete and utter bastard, right?”

I smile softly, sipping more from the miraculous beer. “He sure was...” Letting out a weary, nostalgic sigh, I close my eyes for a moment as vivid childhood memories of the imperfect man who raised me cloud my mind.

Luxy claps her hands together, breaking me out of my nostalgia-induced stupor. She looks around awkwardly, shifting in her seat. “Soooo... anyway. Yeah, uh. I didn’t want to meet you face to face... like... ever... but here we are, I guess...? Been a while since I’ve done the whole meet and greet with one of you...”

“One of me? A mortal?”

She looks like she’s about to say something but holds her tongue. “No, you- ugh... we’ll get there, alright?”

“Well, at any rate...” I present the little shot glass filled with ambrosia, “Here’s the offering I initially made. It’s all yours, Luxy.”

She looks at me like I just showed her a steaming pile of dogshit. Profoundly disgusted, the Goddess looks me in the eyes. “Am I a joke to you?! If that glass were any smaller, I’d presume it was meant for ants! Give me the bottle, Mortal, or you’ll be leaving my Heavenly Realm today without a single answer to any of your questions.”

“Don’t worry, I promise you’ll be getting the bottle.”

“Finally!” She crosses her arms, pleased with herself over her perceived victory. “It might’ve taken you a while, but I’m glad you understand the position you’re in! Hand it over!”

“You misunderstand me. I mean to say you’ll get the bottle bit by bit, only after you answer my questions. I’ll determine for myself whenever you’ve earned a new shot, so you’d best make sure your answers are worth it.”

The Goddess’s face sours, and she bangs her fists on the table. Lightning rumbles in the clouds off in the distance, showcasing the cost of her growing ire. “That’s not good enough for me! How do I know you won’t run out of questions, huh?!”

“Oh, I think we’ll manage somehow or another...” Taking the list of questions I wrote in advance out of my pocket, I unfold it and hold the crinkled paper up within my hand as I adjust my glasses.

Luxy frowns and bites her lip, annoyed. She twists her head to the side and grumbles something unintelligible to me before conceding and saying, “...Very well, Mortal, give me the initial offering.”

I raise the cup towards Luxy, and she snaps her fingers. I assumed that she would teleport it into her hand or something, and she’d drink it like an ordinary person, but no, that wouldn’t be befitting of a Goddess. Instead, a dove appears from out of the sky. It swoops down, somehow snatching away the tiny shot glass. Luckily for me, her feathered servant also finds the time to shit on the table next to my hand.

The magical dove flies the ambrosia-filled glass toward its mistress, and instead of taking it, the Goddess opens her mouth. Hovering slightly above her, the dove tips the glass over enough to pour the golden liquid down Luxy’s hatch. I’m floored by this excessive showing of sheer laziness. Perhaps she finds the idea of holding a cup that a mortal touched offensive? At any rate, the noble houses of Karnalle are home to many an arrogant nobleman, but this... is something else.

Clearly, the nobility has nothing on the arrogance of the Gods.

After downing the magical shot, Luxy’s expression softens and melts into that of unrestrained joy. She sighs with contentment, her cheeks fill red with blush, and she wipes some of the drink from her lips. When she’s like this, she’s downright adorable... even I have to admit that much.

The dove flies back over to my side of the table, carrying the emptied shot glass in its beak. The bird places it down in front of me, waiting for the next time it’s full so that it can make a return trip.

“So tasty!” Luxy sighs a second time, her body tingling with little goosebumps as she hugs herself to keep calm. Suddenly, the Goddess realizes she’s being childish, and she shakes it off. She reassumes a severe expression. “V-Very good, Mortal. You have both my thanks and my permission to ask me any questions that come to mind. I must preface this by saying that due to the nature of your... situation... there are a great many things that I legitimately cannot answer.”

We’re starting off strong right off the gate, then. Very well, I’ll just outright ask. “And why is that? Are you not one-half of the supreme deities of Karnalle? Who’s stopping you from telling me everything I need to know?”

“This is just how we’ve always done things...” She shrugs, evading the question.

“Who is ‘we’? Your sister?”

“Yes, duh.” Luxy rolls her eyes. “Neither of us can spell out all the details, or you wouldn’t grow. That’s the main reason I haven’t intervened in your life too much until now.”

Lot of information to unpack there, but I set it off to the side. “...Alright. If you really can’t tell me certain things, then I’ll have to try and be respectful of that and keep it in mind.”

“See that you do,” She narrows her eyes. “Now, do you have a real question for us to begin with? I’m not getting any younger, and I want that ambrosia, damn it!” Luxy drools at the thought of tasting more of that sweet, sweet nectar.

Reading from the top of the list, I ask plainly and simply, “Why am I so special?”

Luxy stares at me in silence before smirking. “Because everyone loves you, and you’re perfect in every way.” She watches my face long enough to gauge I’m unamused before laughing to herself. “Is that really what you wanna start this game of questions with, Mortal? C’mon, dude.”

Clenching my fist and exhaling through my nose, I nod. “Yes. Please, tell me anything you can about whatever bullshit magical destiny you planned out for me.”

The Golden Goddess thinks to herself as she gazes off into the horizon of her serene Realm of beauty and wonder. After a deliberate moment of silence, she asks me a pointed question. “How much do you know about Karnalle’s history?”

“More than most, I’d imagine. You know how I enjoy the art of the written word, and in my studies, I’ve read-”

“Yeah, yeah,” Luxy waves her hand dismissively, even though she was the one who asked me the question. “So, Demon Lords... you probably know all about that shit, right?”

“...Yes, I’ve read a book or two on the matter.” My hand instinctually creeps towards the tankard of beer in case this goes somewhere I don’t like.

“You already know where this is going,” She frowns and crosses her arms. “Every time there’s a Demon Lord... what happens?”

I take a deep breath while ruminating on her implication. “A Hero of Light rises up to defeat him,” Sighing, my head falls limp. Luxy waits for me to continue, but instead, I down the dark, dry beer in one massive chug.

Sliding the tankard toward the center of the table, I look Luxy in the eyes and say, “I’m going to need something a lot stronger, please.”