Kind Revenge

Capital city Lagoon Paradise , Avesta 7

The place was packed, all the tables were occupied, the cards, roulette, dice were spinning non-stop. Everyone in the place was dressed in their best clothes, a live band was playing, and the party went on and on. One of the most iconic places of paradise known as Avesta 7, in one of the largest archipelagos of the planet was its capital, and in it the legendary Lucky Dice, a hotel and casino well known by all, both for its mythical anti-gravity racing circuit and for being owned by Rafael, one of the best dealers of goods there were. Right now he was at the central table of the hall, the dueling arena where only the best were facing each other, where a high-stakes poker game was taking place, even the spectators were holding their breath at what was happening. Titles of property were on the table, all representing objects of unquestionable quality, the largest of which? Two perfectly preserved pieces of art from the amber room of Catherine Palace in Russia, which had been destroyed during WW2 and which somehow some angel managed to carry away as a souvenir.

The moment to reveal the cards had arrived, and each man presented his best play. The result however was as expected, Rafael had won again, a Royal flush was in his hand, the winner who took all. The audience applauded such a duel, it was a great battle, the winner however showed kindness to his rivals and told them that they could ask for whatever they wanted to drown their sorrows tonight, as the house would invite them. Among the crowd there was a girl, she was not there for the poker game, she was waiting patiently for the game to end, her clothes were also different, a light samurai armor with a bow, but as she was already a usual visitor they did not pay attention to her. The former monster hunter approached Rafael who was still collecting his new property titles. 

"Oh, hi Urakaze!"
"Sorry you're late, we had to start without you"
"But don't worry, we'll have some nerds from Onigan City here again tomorrow"
"I hear one of them has a mint condition copy of the first Superman comic book"
"Supposedly he bought it the same week it came out"

"Good to hear, but my delay was due to a rumor that I need to go and confirm for myself before I come here"
"I have some pretty important news for you"
"It's about your wife, Adelis"

Rafael stopped what he was doing immediately, his characteristic smile faded and a rather serious face towards the hunter replaced it.

"What happened?"
"Whose teeth do I have to break?"

"I need you to listen calmly ok"
"Slowly listen to me, the news comes in two parts."
"I'm going to tell you one and then the other, so don't do anything crazy until you hear both."

"I am calm!"
"I need to be calm to think about how I will torture him"

"Just leave down the gun, please"
"It's not here anyway"

"You can talk at before I try to see if it is loaded with you"

"Okay, it's about Nediadis, have you heard about her?"

"The goddess of that shithole planet?"
"Now, what did she do?"

"Well, she somehow found out about your wife and fell in love with her"
"She wanted her all to herself and kidnapped her the next day"

Rafael got up from his chair and started walking towards the lobby of the Hotel without stopping for anything, a poor man who was in his way did not notice him because his back was turned to him. Rafael said nothing, turned around and gave him a right so hard that he knocked the poor man down with one blow for not getting out of the way, then continued on his way, all the others gave him a field to see what would happen if he did not. Urakaze was behind him trying to calm him down but he did not pay any attention to her, he simply went on his way and took the phone out of the hands of one of the receptionists.

"Hello?"
"Put Kratos on the phone, tell him I have an assignment he'll enjoy"
"Yeah, tell him it's me so tell him to hurry up"

"Rafael! please wait!"
"I told you the news came in two parts!"
"Let me finish!"

"Say it fast then"

"Cesar has already noticed!"
"He went to rescue her himself"

"Oh, that was fast...."
"....."
"Hello!? Yes, sorry, I just wanted to let you know that I got the axe you asked for"
"What address do you want me to send it to?"
"...."
"Ok, yes, I have it, I will pack it with the deer skins, do you think so?"
"Great, let me know if anything happened with the shipment"

Rafael hung up the phone and wrote a note just after the address.

"The trial is being held in the 101st Judicial Circuit"
"The place is full"

"The whole solar system?"
"Hell, how many people is that?"

"A lot, even the animals will testify"
"And there is even more of everything"
"The case is so important that Michael will be the prosecutor"

"Him, as a prosecutor?"
"Isn't he the director of the Celestial Security Section?
"Isn't there someone else?"

"THE BOSS wants the trial to be as strict as possible"
"After all Cesar got angry, also the things that Nediadis did were not pretty either."
"Hey, guess who the lawyer is?"

"Who wanted to be the lawyer with Michael as the prosecutor?"
"Mr. Wright?"

"No, he is still alive"
"Almost nothing, only one of the best, It will be the Virgin Mary, she will be the lawyer"

"There is no way Nediadis will win, even with her as her lawyer"

"Everyone knows that"
"What Mary is looking for is a sentence reduction"
"That is what is at stake"

"Reduced by how much? five minutes?"

"I don't know, just the witness statements will take a couple of centuries at least"
"The list is long, long indeed"

"Oh well"
"Maybe I'll go see the trial when I have nothing to do"

"Hey!"
"Are you going to leave it like this? Are you not going to do anything?"

"What do you mean?"
"What do you have in mind?"

"I got this at a store for jokers while I was doing research"
"Venus H-0-Terminus fireball chili, Mexican grandma's special recipe, private infernal reserve chili sauce"
"Prohibited on hospital worlds and space stations"
"Comes with a cooler"

"Is it the one with the rumors?"

"The one who made DeMarco the mute talk and pissed off Gandhi?"
"Yes, the same one!"

"Damn, how did you get that?"
"The waiting list for its purchase was supposed to be exclusively for the best warriors of the angels! is mainly used at the Celestial Security Section summer party for pranks."
"I heard one time a guy was researching making a nuclear reactor using that as fuel"

"Someone bet your post and lost"
"Wouldn't you like to use it?"
"You know, a little five-year-kid prank."

"And how do you plan to use that without getting the police involved?"

"Well, the judging is a solemn act."
"It is a serious environment, especially for Nediadis"
"But before the beginning of each session, everyone has to be in the room before the judge arrives, in this case, THE BOSS"
"But what would happen if a small needle pricks the useless Goddess before the session starts and injects some of this into her blood?"

"It would be like each cell being stung by a beehive being attacked by ants"
"She would gain weight from the swelling alone."
"But isn't it risky?"

"Normally yes, but she's already pissing everyone off"
"She can't risk anymore, she will have no choice but to be willing and endure the pain every second that passes!"

"Okay, I'm in"
"What do you need"

"First of all we need access to the courtroom"
"But your wife is one of the offended ones and the one who angered Cesar, they will let you in without any problems"
"The problem is how to poke her with the needle"
"I had thought about me throwing it from the bleachers, but although my aim is good, if the bleachers are 500 meters long, there will be nothing I can do"

"Then we need a shooter"

"Exactly"
"I can build a rifle that is capable of throwing the needle and looks like a walking stick"
"But it won't have a scope obviously"
"We need a sniper and at the same time not use a scope to make the shot."

"Ummm...."
"I think I have the right person"
"...."
"He has a farm somewhere else but I think he will accept the proposal for a good bottle of real Spirytus"
"His name is Simo Häyhä, he has a brutal record"
"Although he still likes to be called a farmer"
"Sometimes he comes here to the north pole to fish"

"Simo Häyhä! The White Death!"
"The best sniper of the Second World War?"

"Yes, why not"
"He's a pretty nice man, I don't think he'd refuse to play a little joke on someone"

"Nice man?"
"500 confirmed deaths in three months is a kind person?"

"Or also 600 headshots in a week."
"Some idiot angel hired him for the summer party prank tournament and gave him a paintball rifle"

"What the heck!?"

"They had to build a trench connecting the barbecue area and the parking lot"
"He came in second place in the prank tournament in case you were wondering"

"And he didn't win?"

"Competition is fierce every year"
"There is real talent among these people"

Rafael started walking again heading to his office to prepare his little prank in revenge. Urakaze followed him to fine-tune the details and adjust the plan to perfection so that no one would notice who would be responsible. The goddess was in for a horrible torture that she would have to endure for a long time with a straight face.