Practically the moment I unlocked my phone screen I remembered and realized exactly what Dylan wanted. We had plans, and all the shit going on today had completely erased them from my mind. I went ahead and read the text anyway, just in case.

“Hey, were we still gonna do that late-night study session we’d talked about doing tonight, or is all this stuff with Olivia getting in the way? Also, just wanted to check in on whether or not you took the pills / if they’re working.” Yup, dangit. I had completely forgotten we’d planned to study. Could I really blame myself, though? Studying on a Saturday was lame as hell, but sadly also necessary. I began tapping away a reply, marveling at how my smaller fingers looked dancing across the keyboard.

“Oh shit, yeah I totally spaced, sorry bro. Yeah, library at eleven, same spot we used last Wednesday, right? And yeah, I took the pills. Kinda weird man, but I think they’re actually working. Olivia was super into me tonight. It’s great!” I waited a few more moments, just kind of awkwardly staring at the screen, then got a reply.

“Nice! Glad to hear that at least. To be honest, I wasn’t expecting that. No weird side effects or anything? Just checking, wanna make sure everything is working correctly. Also yeah, library. Same spot.” There was something off about Dylan’s texts. I couldn’t place it, but he was definitely writing stuff differently than usual. His word choice seemed unplaceably different. After a few moments of contemplation, I shrugged and wrote back.

“Nope, none. It’s kinda weird, but also I’m enjoying it. It’s pretty cool, to be honest, dude. Just promise not to be weird about it, okay? Anyway, I’ll see you in a bit?” 

“Sure, see you soon. And come on, seriously? I’m not gonna be weird. If you’re happy with what they’re doing then that’s cool.”

With that, I split off from my original path and headed toward the campus library, slightly nervous about Dylan and the general public seeing me. Despite that, nobody seemed to give me a second glance, so I kept my head down and mind focused on the destination. It was best that way, I didn’t want to get sucked into another spiral of weird self-reflection. My goal in sight, I approached the library, climbing the outer stairs, and was about to reach for the handle when some guy who had been casually lounging out front opened the door for me. Not wanting to look up and give him a good look at my face I muttered a quick thanks and rushed through the door. As I passed he smiled kindly at me, his gaze lingering a little longer than I was used to.

“Of course, Miss. Have a nice night,” he called after me. I nearly stopped dead, but somehow managed to keep going with only a light stumble and a small squeak. I blushed furiously once more and hurried into the library, eyes glued to my feet, and almost bumping into the second set of doors. Had he really just said that? He thought I was a girl? It was pretty dark and he couldn’t get a good look at my face, so maybe it wasn’t too crazy for him to make that mistake. But fuck, him calling me that brought back all those feelings from Olivia once again. I struggled to push them down and focus, then scurried across the library to the secluded little nook Dylan and I typically used to study. When I arrived he was already there, casually reading some book with pastel colors on the cover, not that I really cared what it was. Magical studies books were way beyond me, to the point there was hardly any reason to give them a second thought. As I approached he glanced my way, did a double-take, then straightened himself out and stashed the book in his bag.

“Hey um, buddy? Uh shit, sorry. Just hey, those pills really did a number on you, holy crap.” Dylan was fumbling through his words; clearly, he still hadn’t quite mentally prepared himself for what he was about to see, cause really it wasn’t that big of a change.

“You think so? I think I mostly look the same, just a bit more rounded out. Also I told you not to be weird.” I shrugged, moving to settle in next to him.

“Uh, yeah, sorry. But also, you’ve proven to me time and time again that you’re a really bad judge of your own appearance. If I didn’t know any better, I’d have thought you were some random kind of butch-looking girl walking my way. The only thing that clued me in was that you more or less look like your own sister.” He managed to pull himself together, then flashed me a big, friendly smile that seemed almost congratulatory, and for the way-too-many-eth time that night, I found myself blushing, with my heart racing and my brain spinning out uselessly. 

What the hell was wrong with me? It was one thing with Olivia complimenting me, but with guys now too? Was I bi or something? I took a moment to examine Dylan closely, taking in his form, his muscles, his chiseled jawline. I tried to imagine myself -- ugh, no thank you. I shuddered a little at the thought, while he gave me a very confused look. For my part, I was still far too preoccupied to fully register and respond to said look. Was my feminization kink really that powerful that it went beyond my own sexuality? Could literally anyone set me off then? That sounded pretty depraved, but well, I couldn’t think of any other possible reason I’d be reacting this way. And frankly, being told I looked like a girl felt too good for me to really care or bother examining it further. I barely registered Dylan excusing himself for the bathroom, too deep in thought to really care. But soon enough the gears churning in my head slowed down enough for me to think clearly again. 

I took a moment to calm down, slumping forward in my chair and resting my head on the desk. I then  realized that I had been so deep in thought that I’d forgotten to swing by home and actually grab my study materials. Oh well, that would be fine, I could print them out using the library computer. Hopefully my library printer points for the semester were still plentiful, I didn’t want to pay their dumb print-fee. I stood, planning on heading over to the computer lab, then almost immediately tripped over Dylan’s bag, nearly face planting. I steadied myself on the desk and caught my breath; what the hell? Had my foot slipped inside my own shoe? That wasn’t a problem before, was it? I’d thought my feet were one of the only parts of me that hadn’t really shrunk. My feet were pretty small to begin with, for a guy, anyway. 

That was another thing that had often made me feel very inadequate. A few months prior, I’d gone bowling with Dylan and some of his frat brothers, and watching them all head up to the counter asking for size twelves and thirteens, etcetera, only for me to head up and ask for a size nine had been very humiliating. Now, though, it seemed my feet had gotten even smaller, because my foot had definitely slipped inside the shoe and caused me to lose my footing and trip. I wracked my brain for an explanation before ultimately settling on the fact that it was, to be quite honest, pretty damn weird. Maybe I had been having that problem all night and just hadn’t noticed it until it caused me to trip? 

Regardless of the reason, I had something more important to worry about: getting my study materials. I stooped over to straighten up Dylan’s stuff, and my eyes fell upon the book he had been reading, which had spilled out of his bag when I tripped. My eyes widened when I got a proper look at the cover. From what I could see the book seemed to be very clearly about trans people. Which was totally cool, obviously. Trans people were great and fine and honestly probably had the right idea. But why would Dylan need a book like that? He had always been always a pretty open and accepting person, but I’d never imagined him as the kind of person who researched such things on his own time. Then suddenly, as though I’d been struck by a bolt of lightning and a hit by a semi and bit in the ass all at once, it dawned on me. Holy shit. How could I have been so stupid? It was so incredibly obvious, right in front of me really, and this whole time I’d been so caught up in this thing with Olivia to give it the proper thought. Dylan, was trans, wasn’t he? That must have been why this business with him giving me a girlier body bothered him so much. Also, should I be saying her? Probably not yet, not until he asked me explicitly to call him that. They might also be fine, but I’d worry about it later.

Now that I thought about it, the pieces really did fit well together. Dylan was acting pretty weird this whole time. For one, he was just awkward in general, which was really unusual for him. He was a social butterfly in the kind of big, friendly meathead way. And also he wasn’t calling me bro or dude like he usually did, which actually, that was the thing about his texts that bothered me too, wasn’t it? Maybe he thought I was a girl too ‘cause of all this stuff with Olivia? It was also definitely possible I was wrong and he had the book for some other reason, so I couldn’t be 100% certain that he was trans. But it was probably best to start thinking of him that way to make the shift easier. I sighed; things were getting complicated, too complicated for me to fully work out at the time. 

Dylan came back, looking casual as ever with a big load of books in “his” arms. I felt a little bad for him, he must have hated being that big and bulky, god knows I could relate. Still, he didn’t give any hint of sadness as he settled into his study spot. The night then progressed normally from there. Mostly normally, anyway. There was a certain tension in the air that I couldn't ignore. He kept looking like he wanted to say something, opening and closing his mouth awkwardly. He probably wanted to come out or tell me he was jealous or something. But surely he could just find a way to turn himself into a girl too, couldn’t he? Sure there was probably some risk, but if nothing else I was a successful guinea pig. Kind of, anyway, I wasn’t actually a girl, of course. Maybe he was too scared or too caught up in the image of himself as hypermasculine to take those initial steps. I wanted to help him, but for the time being, I had way too many things to deal with myself. Still, when we wrapped up for the night, heading out into the cool night air, I interrupted his awkward stammering to put a hand on his shoulder and wish him a good night, giving a gently squeeze and letting him know that he could always talk to me if there was something important on his mind. 

I turned tail and disappeared into the night, leaving him looking absolutely stunned, confused, and bewildered. I found myself smiling again as I set off for home. Poor Dylan; he had a lot to work out, but I would be there for him. I swore to myself then and there I would be a good ally no matter what.

SapphicSounds

Such a good ally. Honestly, we need more cis people like Jesse. If you're enjoying things so far, you can currently get early access to all of this story, along with several other benefits such as exclusive audio content, exclusive writing, and pictures of my cat on my patreon for as little as $2 a month.