It was about five minutes to four when I got to the shop. I remembered to take my hat off before I went inside, Selene complained about it when I wore it indoors on Sunday. I had a feeling she'd complain about something else today, but there wasn't anything I could do about that.

It was Tuesday now and I still hadn't had a chance to get my hair cut. She had me work yesterday afternoon after class, and she wanted me in again this afternoon too.

Luckily my hair stopped its bizarre growth spurt yesterday. When I woke up Monday morning it was another couple inches longer and actually reached my shoulders, but when I got up this morning it hadn't grown any more than that.

So I did my best to hide it under the hat when I went to school. I wasn't sure the hat actually fooled anyone, but to my relief nobody said anything. At least not yet.

I was sure Chuck and Doug would have had something to say. If not about the hat or the hair, then about what happened on Saturday. But they'd left me alone, they hadn't even said a word to me in the past two days.

I wasn't going to complain of course, and I sure wasn't going to go asking them why they were ignoring me.

"Hello hon," Selene greeted me with a smile as I came in. It quickly faded though as she stared at me.

"Hi Selene," I replied as I moved past to the back door. I left my hoodie and my hat in the stock-room, then made my way out to the front and joined her behind the counter.

I still wasn't entirely used to how her appearance kept changing between old and young.

When the store was open, she almost always looked like she was in her mid-forties, complete with greying hair and a few extra pounds around her middle and everything. But then other times she was barely twenty. She was slimmer, prettier, and her hair was a bright platinum blonde.

I was taken aback by the concern in her voice as she asked, "Hon, did those two bullies give you a hard time again?"

"Nah," I shrugged. "They haven't even spoken to me since Saturday."

She looked and sounded so worried as she asked, "Do you want to tell me what happened?"

I wondered if that was how other people's moms acted, when this sort of thing happened to them.

"It was just my dad 'suggesting' that I should get my hair cut," I sighed. "He really doesn't like how I look with longer hair."

"I'm sorry hon." Selene gave me a sympathetic look, as she reached up with her right hand. She cupped my cheek, then I felt her thumb gently stroke across my lower lip.

There was a light tingling sensation, and as she let her hand drop away again I realized the pain was gone, and my lip no longer felt swollen.

I stared at her for a second, then hurried out from behind the counter to the display under the window. There were some 'scrying mirrors' there, and I picked one up and checked. Sure enough my lip looked fine. It wasn't split anymore, there was no swelling, no redness. It was healed.

"Wow," I looked back at my boss again, "Thank you!"

She gave me a warm smile, then asked "So you're going to get your hair cut tomorrow I guess? I thought you liked it like that."

"Yeah," I sighed again as I put the mirror back. "I do kind of like it? But it's not an option."

She shook her head, "That's a shame, hon."

After that, we kind of dropped the subject and both of us focused on work. She had some more training for me, mostly it was about me learning all the products she sold. So if people came in looking for some obscure thing I'd know how to help them.

It was only my third day on the job but I was already doing pretty good I thought. I learned quickly, and was already pretty fluent on the books and the incense. Today she was teaching me about the rocks and crystals, like not just what kinds she sold but what sorts of different things they were used for.

While we did this it crossed my mind that there were barely ever any actual customers. I hoped maybe she was busier towards the end of the week, because if all her days were like the past couple I couldn't see her staying in business much longer. One thing for sure, she definitely didn't seem to need any help around the place. There wasn't enough work for one person, let alone two.

As usual the time passed way too quickly and before I knew it Selene was getting ready to close up for the night.

I helped of course, I swept the floor and made sure the merchandise was all in the right places and everything. I suppressed a sigh and asked, "I guess that's it till Saturday then? I've done my two weeknight shifts already."

Selene nodded, "I'm afraid so, hon. We can't have you spending all your free time here, I know you need some time to yourself. And I'm sure you need time to take care of homework right?"

I shrugged as I grabbed my hoodie from the back room, "It's basically the last week, there's not much homework. And next week is all just exams."

"Then don't you need time to study?" she asked with a concerned frown.

"Nah," I shook my head.

I blushed as I admitted, "If I actually tried, I'd probably be in the honour roll or whatever. But I get ok grades without much effort, and I don't really see the point of doing more than that."

I added with a sigh, "And getting high marks would just draw attention to me. I did that back when I was younger, it just got me more beatings. Safer to just be forgettably average."

Selene was still watching me with concern as she asked, "Well don't you want to spend time with your friends? Or your family?"

"I don't have any friends," I replied quietly. I touched my now-healed lip as I reminded her, "And uh, my family aren't a lot of fun for me to be around."

She looked troubled, but of course there wasn't really anything she could do about any of that.

Before she could say anything else I shrugged. "Anyways, I'll see you Saturday. Ten o'clock sharp."

"Ok hon," she opened the door and waved as I left. "You take care of yourself."

I waved back, and heard the clunk of the lock as she closed up for the night.

Rather than head straight home I wound up just wandering around downtown for a while. Everything else was closing up too, but I wasn't in a hurry to see my folks just yet. As I passed another dark storefront I caught my reflection and realized I'd forgotten my baseball hat in Selene's stock-room.

I stopped and stared for a few moments at my image, but the imperfect mirror made it hard to pick out details. With my shoulder-length black hair and oversized hoodie on my scrawny frame, I could easily imagine I was looking at the reflection of a girl.

The outline wasn't quite right of course, I lacked the wider hips and narrow waist. But my face was androgynous enough on its own, and the longer hair sort of sold it.

I sighed slightly as I stared, and let my mind wander.

I often thought my life might be better if I was a girl. I was sure my dad wouldn't beat me so much. Neither would bullies like Chuck and Doug. I couldn't be sure anyone would actually treat me better, but not getting hit anymore would be a big enough advantage on its own.

Beyond that, there was just a sort of vague idea that life would be better. Without being able to explain why though, I wasn't really able to evaluate the feelings. In the end I chalked it up to the same reason I liked the theatre. It was an opportunity to not be me. I wasn't a girl, so the thought of being one probably appealed because it meant I wouldn't be me.

I finally turned away from my reflection and continued on my walk home.

I managed to stretch the forty-five minute trip into a little over two hours, thanks to some creative detours and a slow, distracted pace.

As I gradually made my way along the sidewalk towards home I let my mind wander off in a different direction entirely. I wondered what my schedule would be at the store in July, after school was out. Would Selene let me work full time? Would I be able to spend every day there?

And if not, could I get away with telling my folks I had to work full time anyways, so I'd have an excuse to be out of the house regardless?

I was lost in those thoughts and didn't see the other person on the sidewalk, who was equally distracted by the portable game console in his hands. The two of us collided, and he wound up on his backside.

"Oh shit!" he gasped as he scrambled to pick up his game off the pavement.

I took a step back and asked, "Is it ok?"

He was franticly checking it over, then said in a relieved tone, "Yeah, I think so."

"And are you ok?" I asked him.

He lived next door to me. He was a bit of a geek, and was always into games and computers and whatever electronic thing was the latest fad. I assumed his folks were rich, or at least well-off that they could afford to get him all that stuff.

"Yeah I'm fine," he replied as he got to his feet. He finally looked at me, "Oh, sorry Natalie! Are you all right?"

I blinked and stared at him for a few seconds. I wondered if this eleven-year-old kid was already getting on board with the teasing and the bullying. He was easily as big as me already, despite being five years younger. Calling me a girl, or referring to me by a girl's name was one of the ways it started.

From his concerned expression I realized he wasn't trying to tease. He actually looked worried that he'd hurt me or that he'd be in trouble for walking into me.

"I'm fine. And you can call me Nate."

He frowned, "Uh, isn't that a boy's name?"

I wasn't even sure how to react to that, so I just nodded "Yeah."

The kid looked at me kind of confused, and I started to feel weird and awkward as it finally dawned on me. He actually thought I was a girl. He wasn't trying to tease me and he wasn't just confused about my name.

I decided to bail out of the whole situation and said "Just watch where you're going, ok Alex?"

He nodded, "Ok Natalie, see you later!"

I watched as he turned and headed away towards his front steps, then I did the same. I covered the last twenty meters to the side door, then took a deep breath and went inside.

I was already committed to getting my hair cut tomorrow after school, doubly so after realizing the kid next door had started thinking I was a girl. Still, I had a bad feeling my dad would want to give me a 'reminder' tonight. Especially since I forgot my hat at work and the long hair was on full display.

My folks were in the living room again, they were both sitting in front of the TV. Dad had a beer in his hand, mom had a glass of cola. Probably with some rum in it. Fortunately neither of them wanted to see me. They didn't say anything to me when I came in, they didn't even look my way.

I didn't want to call any attention to myself so I didn't bother greeting them. I just went straight into the kitchen to see if I could find something to eat.

Left-overs from tonight's dinner were waiting in the fridge, mom had made some dry overcooked meatloaf. I got myself a piece of that, then decided not to bother warming it up. I figured if my folks heard me using the microwave, they might want to talk to me.

With my dinner and a glass of milk I disappeared down to my bedroom in the basement.

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