Whole Cake Madness
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Chapter 26

 

Katakuri: You’re nervous…what could possibly make you nervous?

 

Me: Many things brother. I am afraid of many things.

 

Katakuri: Still, this is unlike you to be so afraid of something. Tell me, what is wrong?

 

A mochi hand expanded around me as he sat down and carried me close. Sitting by the wall he pulled me onto his lap and made me face him.

 

Me: Nothing brother. There is nothing wrong.

 

Katakuri: I know you too well to know that is a lie. Now tell me before I force it out of you dear little sister.

 

I didn’t want to tell him. It’d hurt him to know the truth of what I was thinking; that I believed that despite his efforts…this family was dysfunctional, that Mama was going to be the end of us all. That I wanted to leave everything behind…even if that meant leaving brother as well. Ever since the battle on Dressrosa, the outlook of things…got more extreme. I always knew that things were never going to last but the taste of defeat was bitter, the call of power too sweet to refuse and the beckoning cry of the sea too loud to ignore any longer.

 

Me: Nothing is wrong brother. It is simply my worry about the Germa Kingdom. They have only ever been defeated once and that was hundreds of years ago.

 

I lied. Brother Katakuri’s observation haki could probably tell I was lying but I knew he wouldn’t continue to pick on him. He was too kind for that after all.

 

Katakuri: A North Blue Kingdom against an Emperor? You don’t need to worry. I’ll leave you to your studies then little sister.

 

As he left I couldn’t help but think about what lay beyond this horror Disney land mama had created. Of course I knew what was beyond, but I meant that as in what was there for me? I was known as Mama’s pet or Sweet Commander. Everything defined about me was part of the Charlotte Family. Maybe Mama never used her love or compassion if she even knew how to, but through everything else…she kept her children, especially the strong ones, tied to the family.

 

Those who left the Pirate crew often never met good ends. Lola might have ended up better than most but it was only a coincidence that the Straw Hats happened upon Thriller Bark and was both strong and naive enough to help them. Most pirates, including myself, would not do that.

 

I was distracted by my thoughts when the den den mushi began to ring. Sanji was captured…the Whole Cake Arc was beginning.

 

 

 

Pudding: Sis…I’m not sure if I can do this.

 

Me: Pudding. I’m not sure how many times I need to tell you this but you need to be confident in yourself. Whether he likes it or not…you will be playing the part of getting married. So enjoy yourself. See for yourself whether you would enjoy killing him or not?

 

Pudding: What do you mean?

 

Me: Show him who you are. Show this side of you…as well as the cruel part. Come out true to him so he knows who he is dealing with. When he responds either way, you’ll need to come to a decision.

 

Pudding: What decision?

 

Me: Whether you’ll stick with the family or your own.

 

 

 

 

POV Vinsmoke Judge, King of Germa Kingdom

 

The meeting between the Big Mom Pirates and us went as good as it could be…for a Kingdom making an alliance with Pirates. What that meant was there was only a little bit of threats flying across the table while the gist of the agreement was formed; Sanji would marry Pudding and the alliance would be solidified. In return for Big Mom Pirate’s help in clearing out the forces of North Blue, the Germa Kingdom would share their cloning and weapon technology.

 

In the back of my mind, I knew this was not a good idea. One should never negotiate with Pirates…yet, this was the only way to accomplish what the Germa had wished for so long. 66 Days of total domination of North Blue all under the Germa Kingdom. 300 years has passed and little to no progress of such has been made. We were turned into laughingstock on the comic books and the history books forgot about us and our grand exploit. Even with all of our clones and forces…holding the entirety of North Blue without facing a rebellion would be impossible. Allying myself with one of the greatest forces in the world was our only chance at reclaiming what was ours.

 

I already knew Whitebeard and Shanks would never agree to my proposition nor did they really fit what Germa needed anyway. We needed manpower more than individual power. While both respective Emperors held territory, they never managed it and instead offered protection and a threat to those who tried to invade instead. It was Kaido of the Beasts and the Big Mom crews that had both the strength, experience, and manpower which was needed to help us take North Blue. It was the fact that Kaido would not leave Wano that made my decision to go to Big Mom.

 

Sitting in on the Tea Party, I’m beginning to realize that perhaps this was not the best idea. Big Mom was…not reliable in the least. She had her strength and she had her crew but who she was at her core did not relax me in the slightest. The way she salivated at the sight of food, her childish arguments and tantrums in which her children needed to come and calm her down with food…it was truly unbecoming of an Emperor. Not to mention the past exploits or rumors of what the Big Mom Pirates had done just for ingredients; burning down entire islands and murdering thousands at a time in preparation for a tea party. Sure, it wasn’t anything new to Germa but we carried ourselves with pride not gluttony.

 

Most of all…we felt threatened. Sitting here on this long table with dancing tea pots and singing cookies, I knew I came to the wrong place. The Big Mom Pirates on one side and us (Germa) on the other with Big Mom herself at the head of the table, I came to realize the gap in strength between the Blues and the greatest powers of the New World.

 

Most members of the Big Mom Pirates weren’t present; most likely doing their job around Totta Land or placed around security. The ones that were here were…the lesser members of the Pirate Crew. Members’ whose strength has yet to be recognized by the World Government…except for one.

 

A short pink haired girl wearing a white-cat-hoodie sat directly in front of me as she casually cut apart her once-talking pancakes as if it was a perfectly normal occurrence. By appearance she looked nothing like her mother; she was petite yet athletic looking. Most of all…she didn’t look threatening at all.

 

Despite this, I knew better than nearly anyone of how appearances could be a lie. Behind that soft and innocent looking exterior, Sanji’s bride’s twin was easily the most dangerous of anyone I’ve met. Powerful beyond words and has the brains and logic to back up her actions and plans unlike her mother. My information network informed me that throughout the years she had continued to grow in strength in great bounds in unexplainable ways while others, especially the older members, remained stagnant in their growth and often becoming arrogant.

 

Placing Charlotte Syrup here of all the siblings Big Mom could have brought sent a very clear message.

 

Don’t Fuck with the Charlottes

 

An overwhelming display of strength to try and keep us subservient since even a little girl like her could easily take out all of Germa. It displayed who was the dominant in this contract…the Big Mom Pirates. Losing towards my sons, I could tell they weren’t buying it at all as they continued to laugh and drink their food in ignorance of fear and emotion…but my daughter…she seemed to realize the message the Big Mom Pirates were sending as well.

 

If we step one toe out of line and despite everything we have done to preserve the King’s line for 300 years, this would be it for the Germa Kingdom. We would be wiped off and into Davy Jones’ Locker without even the chance to return to North Blue.

 

Syrup: Sanji…Sanji huh?

 

The girl in front of me said, her attention still on her pancakes which were somehow dissected into perfect quarters. She put a quarter which was drenched in…syrup…before continuing her sentence.

 

Syrup: Is my sister worth that little to you? My loving twin sister?

 

I felt the air grow colder, no it really did grow colder. My next breath let out mist as my children got ready to activate their raid suits. Besides, what was the problem with Sanji? How did she come to that conclusion?

 

Syrup: Don’t underestimate the Big Mom Pirates’ information network Germa.

 

She put an extra emphasis on the word Germa as if it disgusted her.

 

Syrup: Sanji is your disowned son, your runaway prince…a no-name pirate for who knows how long. Now that you need our alliance, you fish him out of whatever blue he was in and set him up against my sister…the Minister of Chocolate and an Officer of the Big Mom Pirates. So, what say you Vinsmoke Judge? You’re trading trash for my beloved sister.

 

I couldn’t help but gulp at her words. She was saying the truth after all. I had no love for my third son…the failure of Germa. Still, I was a King! I could not afford to be looked down upon by the words of someone like her.

 

Me: Careful what you say girl. Sanji no longer carries my honor and blessing as the strength that I expected of Germa is not in him. He is weak as he is kind, his passion for cooking useless for my Kingdom. Despite this, the blood of Royalty flows through his veins. Once disowned or not, your sister should be honored to marry one who carries to blood of the Germa.

 

*shatter* The cup which the girl was holding shattered into a million pieces as she looked up and into my eyes for the first time. Looking quite mad. Around us, the entire room was focused on our conversation now, even Big Mom herself.

 

Syrup: Be careful what you say Germa. The Big Mom crew might rule Totta Land, is one of the greatest powers of the World…despite this, we are Pirates at heart. I’ll simplify it down to match your megalomanic brain; we don’t give a fuck about royalty or your blood. Your only worth is the technology you hold and your son is only there to stamp the event is happening.

 

As the table began to frost over, I knew this was not going to be an enjoyable tea party.

 

 

 

OMAKE! Obligatory Beach Episode!

 

Katakuri: Umm…so what is this really about?

 

Me: Volleyball! More specifically beach volleyball!

 

It was one of the rare days where all 4 of us Sweet Commanders had our day off. Well, if an emergency happened then it would all go down the drain but I’ve been planning this day for ages! Me and sis Smoothie.

 

Smoothie: When was the last time we’ve relaxed and had some fun together brother? I’d say at least ten years ago and that was before Syrup and I even became a commander. We need some bonding time.

 

Cracker: Bonding…by hitting this weak thing over a net on the beach?

 

Me: That’s the definition of Beach Volleyball! But I knew that the ball wouldn’t last long so I asked the blacksmith-san to custom make ours!

 

I brought out the custom bom—I mean ball I got.

 

Cracker: Hold it! Wait a minute! Syrup, isn’t that a cannonba-

 

Smoothie: Now now, let’s just go on with it without wasting any more time on the useless details!

 

Ever my loving sister and hero, Smoothie nee grabbed Cracker by his neck (as he wasn’t in his Biscuit soldier armor) and began dragging him to the beach area.

 

I looked up expectantly to my giant of a brother who looked as if he’s been stunned. Well, probably is as this came out of nowhere.

 

Me: I’m impressed you can keep your calm facade even in something like this. But brother, you really don’t have to do it for us. All of us commanders have observation, we all saw you at least once through that mochi house. In my case I literally eat with you.

 

Katakuri: …

 

Me: It’s going to be fun!

 

Katakuri: I just have a really bad feeling about thi—

 

Me: Nonsense! Now be a good older brother and fall for the whims of your little sister once in a while!

 

Just like that, I followed my sister’s example as I flew up began grabbing brother Katakuri by his scarf and began dragging him as well.

 

 

 

 

Smoothie: Be bolder with your selection! Show yourself!

 

Me: Easy for you to say sis. Your battle attire is literally a bikini!

 

Smoothie: Make your brothers proud!

 

Me: That’s honestly gross in a way sis.

 

Smoothie: This ugly thing won’t do.

 

She beamed away my safe swimming clothes as she presented the red-zone options.

 

Me: no

 

Smoothie: yes

 

Me: No

 

Smoothie: YES

 

Me: NO

 

Smoothie: *grins evilly as she pounces on me*

 

 

 

POV From the outside.

 

Cracker: The changing room’s shaking. You think they’re alright in there? Perhaps I should go in and check.

 

A mochi hand stopped the commander from following his words as the stoic mochi man stared down at him with warning eyes.

 

Katakuri: …

 

Cracker: What

 

Katakuri: …

 

Cracker: You saw, didn’t you?

 

As the mochi man didn’t answer, the biscuit general quietly passed his elder brother a bottle of bleach.

 

Cracker: If it ever haunts you brother.

 

 

 

 

In the end I decided (or was forced) with a light blue two piece. One of the more decent choices from the collection that sis brought me. How she even had the time to get all of those for my size…? Actually I didn’t really want to know.

 

Me: So how are we going to split the teams?

 

A couple intense rounds of Rock Paper Scissors Later

 

Cracker: So Syrup and I versus Katakuri and Smoothie. Sounds good?

 

We nodded.

 

Me: I’m serving since I won the rock paper scissors!

 

I ran over to the end of one side of the court waiting for the slow commanders to take their place.

 

Me: Ready?

 

Katakuri’s nod was all I needed as I threw the bom—I mean ball high up into the air before I geppo-ed up following before spiking it heavily down towards the opposing team.

 

Just from the strike alone the iron ball had a slight dent on one of its side and glowed red with heat. It was just about to hit the ground when a mochi hand dove underneath the ball and bounced it back high up.

 

Smoothie nee didn’t lose her chance as she suddenly grew in size, becoming even taller than Mama (it’s only temporary if she doesn’t absorb anyone to maintain her size).

 

Her hands glowed dangerously from the devil fruit strain as she spiked it down on how location. A shockwave exploded on contact as the devil fruit launched the ball towards brother Cracker at an unimaginable velocity.

 

Cracker: Shit! Biscuit!

 

A hastily formed two layer biscuit shield appeared in front of him as the ball dove straight into it. It broke right through the first layer as it began grinding its way through the second when I intercepted.

 

Me: *shambles!*

 

I teleported the ball high up into the air as I flew up to chase it. Just as the ball began to slow down on its ascent I charged up my right arm to unholy levels for the King Punch. It seemed as if brother Katakuri noticed what I was about to do as he too geppoed his way up before condensing his right mochi arm into his signature Edge.

 

Me: Move brother! This is going to hurt!

 

Katakuri: No surrender!

 

Fine then. Be that way

 

Me: KING PUNCH~~!!!

 

Katakuri: EDGE POWER MOCHI!!!

 

Slammed between two power moves of two figures feared throughout even the New World, the bomb could no longer hold the pressure as it exploded midair.

 

The combustion didn’t hurt but the shards raining down were kind of annoying.

 

Me: That counts as our point since you cheated by crossing over the net!

 

I high-fived my brother Cracker before skipping off to find another bom—I mean ball. After all we, the Sweet Commanders, played Beach Volleyball like normal people.

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