Chapter 8
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"Am I back?" (I)

 

I ask with slightly quivering shut eyes.

 

"Y-yes. You just jumped a dimension. There was a small rift here, but it closed fast." (Z)

 

Being a little through I need to sit for a moment against the wall and order my thoughts.

 

"S-see? I was just in this weird world where terrible things happened to me and when I came back... I was like this. Please, do you know anything at all?" (I)

 

She gives me a really invested pondering look.
Finally, she seems to be done with balancing her thoughts and comes to a conclusion.

 

"Do you really have no other memories, aside from about a human life? Not the slightest bit? Even a strange image in your mind, or blurry memories, or things you want to avoid thinking about for unknown reasons? Is everything that happened until now really absolutely certainly purely human? Even the slightest aberration can be significant." (Z)

"No. I've lived a normal life until now. I have a family. We even have pictures from my earliest childhood. And there are certainly no "aberrations"! That I'm sure about." (I)

"So no incarnation or seal. And you really were human before? Truly no difference?" (Z)

"I was always extremely tired, besides sleeping enough." (I)

"Yes, I can confirm that. Your life energy was always the lowest. Not the slightest bit to take from." (Z)

"Excuse me? Did you drain me as well?" (I)

 

Rather obvious, when she did this in general to everyone.
However, I forgot her earlier state.

 

"N-n-no. L-l-like I-I said there w-was not enough to sip from." (Z)

 

Shall I believe her here? I sounded like an easy target.

 

"Sorry, forgot about this. I am not going to punish you or so. Please keep going." (I)

"R-right. So you said you had problems with sleep. Did you dream much?" (Z)

"No. I almost never had any dreams and if then it was completely disordered trash." (I)

"Oh, damnit. I know what happened." (Z)
"Really? What?" (I)

"You were a dream dweller, a planeswalker." (Z)

 

I must look confused now.

 

"And what is this?" (I)

"First, the theory. Despite common belief, dreams aren't just random "trash" like you did call it. Dreams are worlds created by the dreamer. Some of mundane some of... more special origin. Yet while most are unstable and drift apart as soon the dreamer awakes, which ends the plane, some gain stability. Or a higher existence stabilizes them. Like this, they become stable worlds of their own. The less stable ones have this continuous yearning for energy which makes them sometimes developing in a way that they drain it from every source. Everything there starts to form itself so it can devour. A nightmare plane comes into existence. Or it was just fucked up from the beginning." (Z)

"Okay. I think I understand. But what has this to do with me?" (I)

"You had the unique condition that you didn't dream your own dreams but instead visited existing worlds. And unfortunately, the kind that should be off-limits to humans. You entered them with a conscious mind." (Z)

"This doesn't make any sense. I don't remember any dreams like these before." (I)

"Naturally. Because you died." (Z)

"What?" (I)

"These worlds are nothing one would easily survive. Most die in seconds when they dwell there by accident. And even if not, your human mind would surely not be able to discern a dissipating plane you aren't related to." (Z)

"But if I died, then..." (I)

 

I mean I was alive after I slept many times before this happened.

"Don't confuse this. You cannot die in a dream. Your human body was safe and sound in its bed while you died due to any monster you passed out there. Only your dream presence you visited these dreams with was extinguished. Like this, it didn't come back and you had lost a good chunk of the life energy that made it up. Hence, you feel tired as you're low on energy. Or to put it simply: Each night you shot an expedition of your consciousness into nirvana and wondered why the investment was lost." (Z)

 

On an especially strange level this kind of makes sense.

 

"But not last night, right?" (I)

"No. Not last night. Could you please in detail tell me what happened on your little venture?" (Z)

"Uhh, fine. I was suddenly there. After going to sleep I directly found myself in this weird world. I... I shouldn't explain how it looked or I might get again sucked there." (I)

"It's more your own hopping, but I can remember your description." (Z)

"Okay. First I was heading to the binding point between the planets. Ughh, hard not to think about this. On my way, I heard a sound and followed it as the better alternative. Yet, when I reached it I found a lake consisting of worm- or eellike creatures. One eye on one side maw on the other." (I)

"And then?" (Z)

 

She visibly becomes interested.

 

"I, I was distracted by this view and was ambushed by one of these worms. Then it somehow got me with a jump. I vividly remember how it crept into my body." (I)

"And you didn't die?" (Z)

"No, I was strangely fine and despite its size, it was just gone." (I)

"Was there anything remarkable after this encounter?" (Z)

"I... I did grow my first eye. On my hand." (I)

"So symbiotic, not aggressive. Hearing voices?" (Z)

"There at this place was a strange echo after I fell into that lake!" (I)

"You fell where?!" (Z)

"Into the lake. A monster with a giant maw attacked me and we both fell inside." (I)

"Might be hard, but please remember accurately what happened in there." (Z)

"I saw how the monster was badly eaten by these creatures." (I)

"But not you? This is important!" (Z)

"It... I think it went much slower with me. They entered my body but less eating. More driving themselves inside. First slowly then more and more forceful. In the end, it came to the same as being eaten alive. But for some reason, I still woke up there again." (I)

"And after this, you've heard the voices?" (Z)

"The echo, yes! I then proceeded to my initial destination, but since then my body was weird and... and after this everything that attacked me got kinda eaten alive." (I)

"That's enough. I think I know what happened." (Z)

"Really? Tell me! Please!" (I)

"Those critters hitched a ride but you were lucky." (Z)

"C-could you please explain this in more detail." (I)

"Yes, yes. Your dream 'I' emits something like a weak afterimage of your original plane. Maybe just enough that only those primitive creepers could notice it." (Z)

"And what is important about this?" (I)

"Everything! What do you think how such a stable plane with an abundance of energy looks for such a being? It is the ultimate promise. Now, most tend to eat the dweller to just get what is there. However, this first one, after entering you decided that he might come back with your spirit, simply by connecting with you. The others noticed this and decided to take this chance as well. After you've reached the critical mass, you just sucked all of them inside you." (Z)

"D-doesn't this mean I'm kind of possessed?" (I)

"Not really. While they instinctively somehow were able to react in this utterly abnormal way, this kind of critter isn't able to have thoughts of their own. You wouldn't say that you are possessed by the bacteria inside your body, right? This is the same, just a more severe infection. And as it seems there isn't much of your old body left in the first place, so no bacteria. The echo you heard was just the images of these creatures reacting to your thoughts. Yet as I said they have none of their own. You aren't going to end up controlled." (Z)

 

First, some relief overcomes me, but suddenly a thought sparks up.

 

"Wait! I also took after this some more complex ones. These maw-monsters and even two demons or whatever they're called. They looked complex!" (I)

"And did you hear their voices?" (Z)

 

This question was filled with worry.

 

"Uhh, no. Don't think so. Oh! But after that happened they always kind of dissipated. There was something that felt like screaming and suddenly they vanished!" (I)

"Uhh!" (Z)

 

She looks creeped out and we are talking here about some kind of demon.
That means something.

 

"What?" (I)

"You... Well, you absorbed their souls. Completely extinguished their existences. Not just killing, but completely eradicating, no chance of coming back. This is rather harsh, to say it frankly." (Z)

Ouch!
A demon tells me that I am bad.

 

"Uh, sorry. I didn't do it on purpose." (I)

"I think mostly your internal absorbing center consisting of those critters is to blame.

"How did it end then?" (Z)

"In the end, I was rather dispirited. I wished myself back home and somehow got flushed there with some black fluid. Found myself back in my room, then saw my sleeping self, woke me up, got freaked out, and suddenly was sucked in this very one. Then I woke up like this." (I)

"So even a complete integration into yourself and this in the most direct way possible. I don't want you to get this wrong. But that you came back is a huge problem." (Z)

 

This sounds offensive.

 

"Why?" (I)

"Because now we have confirmed that you indeed were a human before." (Z)

"And this is bad, why?" (I)

"Do you intend to leave the human realm?" (Z)

"Huh? No! My home is here!" (I)

"Then let's say it like this. Do you think you can stay sane for the next, let's start modest, five-thousand years?" (Z)

"H-how did you come to that conclusion?" (I)

"In general, you humans would just get reborn. Some kind of memory cleansing vacancy after death. If not for this all of you would surely soon go crazy. And now we have you! Despite your story and your different thoughts on the subject, you aren't this far away from the mentioned gods. What do you think is the life expectancy we can presume for you in your current state?" (Z)

 

Knowing what she wants to say I become a little self-conscious.

 

"Don't know." (I)

"Then I would say for now indefinite. At last this might develop rather bad for this plane. The great ones were never the kind to leave something unscathed." (Z)

"Don't you know a solution?" (I)

"No! There is no easy "make-everything-like-before-happy-go-lucky-solution". Your body and soul changed in most fundamental ways! Instead, I am rather sure that not a single original cell of yours survived this. And about your soul I don't even want to start!" (Z)

 

This was a devastating strike.
I slump down at the wall and completely lose my hold.

 

"Never thought I would ever see an outer god in this state." (Z)

"Had a bad day. Okay?" (I)

"So you're really not going to devour me?" (Z)

"Really? Still?" (I)

"You've absorbed others." (Z)

"They were all hostile and it mostly happened automatically." (I)

"So your lack of self-control shall soothe me?" (Z)

"I absolutely didn't want this. I've got raised in a civilized country! I don't eat people!" (I)

 

She now squanders around smiling, while whistling a quiet melody, which I cannot recognize.
I can see because of an eye on my arm I instantly clap away.

 

"Mhmm. Then nothing speaks against me staying here, right?" (Z)

"As long no one dies. Who am I to ban you from getting your necessary fill?" (I)

"A goddess, but by the way, as long you're here this place will stay rather safe for me. Kind of protected private area and you on the other side need all the advice you can get, right?" (Z)

 

I only manage a small nod.
Deals with a demon, huh?
Could that be a huge mistake?

 

"Then this is a perfect agreement. Now smile, it can just get better." (Z)

 

This much relief is a little off-putting.

 

"What interests you if I smile?" (I)

"Remember the theory about dreams?" (Z)

"Yes?" (I)

"What do you think does now happen to your nightmares?" (Z)

"This is really too much at once for me. Why I cannot just be concerned with which university I will visit after graduation?" (I)

"Maybe you should really get your head free. Yet I would suggest a department in physics. You should know what kind of rules you're changing there." (Z)

 

I stare for a moment at this weird demon.

And something comes up.

 

"Say..." (I)

"Yes?" (Z)

"Can I see?" (I)

"What?" (Z)

"How you really look. I've just heard that you are not human and this whole seeing aura thing I have now going for me is too new. I would like to know for sure. Or this question will continue to bother me." (I)

"Hmm, fine. But if I show mine you show yours. Or shall I really believe that all this happened without any impact on your appearance?" (Z)

"Uh, no. But I panicked a little when I saw myself. I am rather sensitive about it." (I)

"Huh, no reason for. You shouldn't put human standards on it. I start then!" (Z)

 

She takes some steps away.
Promptly there gathers some dark smoke around her.
The parts enveloped by it turn black.
Her legs become hooves, her eyes turn greenish-yellow with a slit and black scleras while she grows bladed claws, which visibly elongate.
Also, her teeth sprout a little vampiric, while leathery wings sprout out of her lower back.

 

Truly a demon.
The nightmare world felt always so disconnected but here directly in front of me, this has a completely different vibe to it.
In a slightly echoing voice, she speaks.

 

"And now you!" (Z)

 

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