
I was by no means a good person in life. In fact, I think it would be fair to call me bad, if not downright evil. The blood of many people coats my hands. Both from those I had personally killed, as well as those that had been killed by what I had created. So it came as no surprise that I met an untimely end, and now stood in a sweltering hot throne room of what I could only assume was Hell.
Dark black stone was the main building material of the majestic and intimidating room I had found myself in, though the red accents of both cloth and the screams of tortured souls really brought out the ominous feeling.
On a raised area was a throne that seemed to be made from bones. On it sat a fierce, yet beautiful woman. She glared at me with clear disdain, like one might look at someone who littered despite a trash can being only a few steps away.
“Vellen Arcturus, truly one of the filthiest pieces of scum to enter my palace, I trust I need not recite your crimes, the list is quite long and would keep us for quite awhile.”
I wanted to reply, to make a snide remark, only to find that I couldn’t. It wasn’t that my mouth was sealed, but rather, I had no body to speak of. I was a formless wisp simply floating before the Queen of Hell waiting to be judged.
“Normally, you’d be sentenced to the lowest pits of Tartarus, where you would be tortured until your evil Karma faded.” She paused a moment, as a thick black and white tome appeared before her.
“The Book of Fate records all the actions a soul has done, whether in their most recent life, or in one of their previous lives. This is not the first time your soul has stood before me, but I do hope it is the last.” The book opened, its pages flipping quickly before stopping what appeared to be about a third of the way through.
“For some reason the Book does not judge you, as such both I and my siblings have had little choice but to let you reincarnate immediately, an injustice I refuse to perpetuate further. Your soul is darker than the deepest level of the Abyss, clearly indicating to any Divine that you have committed a great amount of evil, and caused excessive amounts of suffering.” Her voice shook with anger and malice.
She glared at me as she stood from her throne and descended in front of my formless soul. “Originally I planned to sacrifice my existence to erase you, to break my Divine Vow and rend your soul into nothingness.” I could feel her hand squeezing around me, threatening to shatter me like a glass orb, yet she didn’t and the pressure eased.
“Because my sister did not want to see me die, she came up with a compromise. Rather than destroy you, we will use you. There is a world that has long been out of the Divine Court’s influence. Ruled by seven Outsiders, beings from beyond the known realms, who do not conform to the rules of Fate. Technically that world is also their prison, preventing their influence from spreading. You will be reborn in that world, and you will defeat the Outsiders, otherwise, the next time your soul finds its way here will be its last.”
Her sharp and commanding tone suddenly shifted as she released her hold on my soul. “This is not without its merits. Unlike a normal reincarnation, you will slowly regain the memories of your past lives, granting you knowledge and skills, something very useful in the world you’ll be going to. In addition, should you defeat the Outsiders, besides your Karmic value rising, you will also be given a reward from the Divine Court.”
The woman took a few steps backwards before making some strange motions and speaking words that I couldn’t understand. As she sped up further and further, a sensation of being pulled backwards enveloped me before I was violently thrust back and lost the sense of my surroundings.
Dafuq did he do?
Must be Bush's soul or maybe Mao
Invented pineapple on a pizza...
@Fich
@Fich pineapple on pizza isn't bad its all up to preference
@Falcondraig another HERETIC trying to justify Pineapple on Pizza, now you are going to say kiwi on pizza is also not bad?
@Lunaressence now thats disgusting . And i am no heretic for thinking pineapple on pizza is fine
@DaMarcus uh what, um ok i get what you're saying but what does that have to do with these comments
@DaMarcus no i said i understand what you're saying but what does what you typed had to do with anything in the comments above
@Falcondraig How is it possible that this bait always works?
@Fich it was a bait? Huh ok,
@Fich
@Lunaressence I'm not afraid, I have an army...






Fight for me minions!
@Mikealike I regret clicking my notifications related to this thread every time
@Fich Today friend, I share with you a truth. A terrible, world changing truth. Fruits are necessary for pizza to exist. Pineapples are fruits.
I’m sorry Fich.
@DaMarcus If you live in the states, go to CiCi’s pizza / buffet. Look at their dessert menu. Weep, for the madness is truth and the truth shall destroy us all.
Pineapple on pizza is stupid and honestly was done as a joke. It doesn't nor has it ever belonged on pizza... and here's why.
"Pulp"
A pineapple SAUCE... that would be interesting and also innovative. Throwing a pulp fruit on pizza was the equivalent of a child mixing their school lunch together in a pile if a mess before eating it.
@BLuU You’ve never had ketchup Mac potatoes with sausage I assume.
Real talk, pineapples do work when paired with other things, such as ham, because of flavor balance or some shit, but done incorrectly it can be shit.
@Rookie_Slime its not the flavor.... its the pulp...
Pulp disrespects the pizza sauce. Not *adding* flavor but actually taking it away, making you focus on the pineapple because the pulp isn't congruent with the sauce. A piece if pulp can explode after the first but... more pulp could end up on the second bite(and I mean the pulp in you're mouth as you chew, because the pulp releases more pineapple juice.) It upsets the balance......
If you blended the pineapple and made a sauce from it, that would be different.
So.. no Pineapple ON pizze... but yes to pineapple IN pizza....
P.S
I assume you mean Mac n cheese, mash potatoes, and sausage with ketchup. I've had it... also had it without the mash potatoes. Instead of ketchup im a big fan of it with A-1 and using kielbasa for the sausage. Now my fat ass is hungry. I just made a hot dog stew.
@Rookie_Slime also I've done pineapple ham, very common combo. Ever had a guava ham?
@BLuU Only issue I’ve ever had is the edges of the pineapple getting too hard after cooking, but I’m also from the south where we’re notorious for disrespecting food (deep fried pineapple pizza has passed through this mouth hole), so it may also be a minor cultural and taste difference.
It’s like tofu. Some people hate it because it gets advertised as a meat substitute and it sure as hell ain’t meat, but others love the sh*t even with meat available. Also, deep fried tofu is pretty dope.
Moral of the story, never give a bunch of college kids in Texas a deep fryer.
@BLuU blu don't, please don't discuss this here I'm tired clicking on this thread
@Rookie_Slime id rather give them a deep fryar.
But also. Deep fried tofu, raw onions, raw green onions. Sesame oil and soy sauce is nice
@Lunaressence I'm sorry I'm sorry hahaa. I'll get back to reading
@Rookie_Slime ever had soyabean 'chaap' it's meat substitut we even use this in our restaurant as a replacement of meat dishes
@Lunaressence I think I had a bite of it from my vegan roommate, but I was drunk as f*ck so I can’t remember the taste. Looked good though.
@DaMarcus wtf stop this madness
@Rookie_Slime
Today friend, I share with you a truth. A terrible, world changing truth. Fruits are necessary for pizza to exist. Pineapples are fruits.
I'm sorry Fich.
Oh shit. You're right. I have to go now. Gotta find some poisonous berries to put on my pizza. (Even if I doubt I can find ones as poisonous as pineapples
)
@Fich eso es maldad pura ........ quemenlo
@Lunaressence the madness returns
@Lunaressence Bush? which one? also you clearly don't have a good frame of reference. I agree with Mao, but you could have added oh I don't know... Hitler and Stalin the two largest mass murderers in existence. Or hey you could add Reinhard Heydrich the literal architect of the holocaust. You're choosing rookie historical figures just saying.
@TheHolyM249 Tomatoes are fruit.