10/23/77

Sam,

Don’t come down here. I’m serious, please don’t. I know you mean well but I am begging you not to. Focus on school so you never have to come back here. You got out, you lucky bastard. I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t like last summer. Sure feels the same to me. I just haven’t wanted to do anything. You’ve been the only whos said anything though. I don’t mind Mike telling you but why didn’t he tell me if he was so worried? I know we ain’t the greatest of friends, but still.

I guess I should talk about the other thing. I do remember that night. Some of its a blur but parts of it are still intact. I’m not mad at you for using that name. It was a hell of a shock. Not a bad shock, just a shock. It was nice to see that name used for me even if it don’t fit me. I guess I should be mad but I’m not. I’m not disappointed or anything really. Just kinda okay, I guess? You were always the one who was better with words between us. It’s hard for me to put anything into words, especially when it ain’t face to face.

I don’t think I’ll be able to get up there but Sarah sounds nice. If she’s okay with it you can give her my address and tell her she can write me if she wants. If she doesn’t want to, thats fine. I’d like to have more people to talk to. I assume she’s one of the lucky ones in the world? I guess it doesn’t matter and she can tell me herself if she wants to talk to me.

I’m gonna end it here but, I just wanna apologize for worrying you. You really do deserve  better.

Love, 

J