[You have survived: 01 days in Limbo!  Have a nice day!]

 

Well, that really seems like deja vu.  Didn’t I wake up to a similar message not too long ago?  Ugh. My head hurts, making all of this hard to think about.  In fact my everything hurts, which is probably why it takes me a little while to think the Voice message away.  Still, it’s nice that it provides a usable measure of time.

That said, saying I’ve been down here a whole day is kind of pushing it.  I mean, the last I remember was being carried by an overly grumpy devil while running from black chains and some shit.  Scourge, I think Tod called it. Nasty shit, regardless of what it was called.

Still, it’s far too noisy in here for me to slip back into the blissfulness of sleep, so I force myself to focus my eyes and turn my head.  Or at least try to. It’s like my whole body is being weighed down. Or that I don’t have any strength.

The slight movements I make though make me realize that something is wrong though.  For one thing, my left hand is on fire. Not literally, but it definitely feels that way.  Burning, shooting pain radiates from that part of my body. The second issue is that I’m not tied up or tied down or anything.  Instead my whole body feels like I’d run a damned hours-long marathon. Stiff and loose and all that shit, all at the same time.

If I were still human or whatever I’d think I’d torn my muscles to shreds.  Severely overworked, in any case. Which as a zombie very much seems like an impossibility.  Who’d ever heard of a zombie suffering from muscle fatigue? Not this guy.

If there is one bright side though, it’s that the pains and aches definitely helps in clearing up my head.  Pain is great in that way, although I get the distinct feeling that the lack of brain chemicals like adrenaline and endorphins are part of the reason why I feel so weird.  It’s like having all the feelings of being alive without a body able to actually produce the things that make one alive. Really fucking weird.

Thankfully I’m not given any time to dwell on the unfamiliar words that pop into my head by the arrival of someone to my bedside.  I don’t have to tilt my head far to see them, thankfully, although the task is harder than it sounds. My body really does feel like it’s been chained down, ugh.

“Glad to see you’re awake.  I’ve read over your case, so I know that things seem a bit weird for you right now, but I want you to try to remain calm while I talk, okay?”  The interloper is a young woman, or at least I assume she is. She has light green hair that kind of sparkles like gems as she moves in the soft white light of the room.

Wearing a white robe with a red silk sash, her skin is somewhat of a bronze tan and her eyes are a vibrant red on a black background.  Which just looks rather fetching, truth be told. That and she has those curves in just all the -right- places, like some damned Greek statue come to life.  All of which means she definitely isn’t one of us Deaders’. Possibly another transplant from the Hells.

“Good.  My name is Siliphes.  I am a succubus, and much like your devil Guide friend I am from the Realms of Hell.  I am also a healer working at the Guide’s Guild here in Helen City. One of about two dozen, actually.”  She starts an introduction, to which I listen and nod at the opportune time. I don’t even think I can talk right now, much less in this strange place.  All I can see are stone walls and a wooden ceiling above, in any case.

“You are a patient currently in the care of the Guide’s Guild.  From what we’ve been informed, your troop comprised of two devil Guides’ and two newly awakened zombies were caught up by the attack by the Scourge on your way to the city.  You should be gladdened to know that all four of you made it to Helen City alive, if not entirely whole.

“Your zombie friend took a major hit from the Scourge chains, and is still unconscious.  He will survive though, if not in one piece. The same could be said for you as well, although with much less damage.  From what we were told you suffered an Overload and fell unconscious before being hurt, so at least be thankful for not having to remember the Scourge poisoning.”

Okay, so maybe this succubus, Siliphes, likes to listen to her own voice or something because she’s really talking.  And talking. And talking. At least it is all informative, although it seems she has some sort of sadistic glee in being able to talk to a captive audience, because her smile is only getting bigger and bigger as her mouth flaps.  Ugh. Maybe it’s a Hell thing, although I cannot be sure.

“Now that I’ve gotten you up to speed, I need to draw your attention to your pending messages log.  That will explain things in far more detail than I can provide, and is a good experience to have if you ever expect to survive alone out in the wilds of Limbo or elsewhere.  So mentally ask for your pending messages just like you’d ask for your status.”

Finally given instructions on what to do, I do just that.  It seems there are quite a few hidden abilities that come with the Voice than what were originally explained to me.  In this case, it gives me something to read other than staring at the succubus’ pretty face.

 

[-Message Log-]

[You have been struck with Terror!  Mental resist failed! (x109)]

[Charge ability learned!]

[Soul Energy Manipulation has leveled up! (x2)]

[You are exhausted! (x5)]

[Charge has leveled up!]

[You are severely exhausted! (x2)]

[Terror has been resisted.]

[Terror Resistance feat learned!]

[+1 maximum Soul Energy for repeated exhaustion.]

[Exhaustion Resistance feat learned!]

[You have been stricken with Mild Scourge Poisoning!]

[Soul Energy has been consumed! (x23)]

[You are exhausted! (x23)]

[+1 maximum Soul Energy for repeated exhaustion. (x6)]

[Exhaustion Resistance has leveled up! (x4)]

[Scourge Poisoning has been purged.]

[You are severely exhausted.]

[You are recuperating.]

 

The list just seems to go on forever, but I scroll through it all and cannot help but grimace.  It really does seem that my frantic dash has something to do with being under the effects of Terror.  But I’ve learned a few things from it, and gotten quite a few new abilities and whatnot under my belt.  Probably not the best way to go about things, but really eye opening.

Especially all those maximum Soul Energy points.  I thought you had to buy those, but it seems there are other ways to gain such things as well.  Useful knowledge, there. The real kicker though is that Scourge Poisoning. Which seems to consume Soul Energy at set time intervals.

How I was injured though is the question, but if anything I can just blame George for being an ass.  Although I doubt it was his fault. And if what Piliphes says is true, the other zombie guy got it far worse.  Thankfully I’m not the one that has to deal with that. Heh.

“Looks like you are done, great.  You are currently recuperating here in the medical ward of the Guide’s Guild, which is a service we provide free of charge to all newly awakened.  Scourge Poisoning however is something we don’t often deal with, and neither is a direct attack by the Scourge itself. It was beaten back however, so there is no danger for the time being.

“And now that you are awake, you can heal up even faster.  Your status has indicated that you’ve been soul exhausted several times, which is what we call Overload.  It happens to those training in magical or combat arts readily enough, but Scourge Poisoning takes that to a whole new level.  It literally rips the Soul Energy out of your body to feed itself, and is one of the few ways that can cause a soul to disperse if you are drained completely dry.

“Thankfully you have the Newly Dead perk, which helped offset the loss somewhat.  It’s automatic while you are unconscious, as a safety measure, but it isn’t very efficient.  Now that you are awake though, you can control it in order to more quickly get over the exhaustion.  So what I want you to do is reach out to the Soul Energy in the atmosphere and will it to be drawn to you.  It can take a bit to get the feel of it for those just starting, but once it enters your body it’ll trigger the perk and it’ll take over from there.  Just make sure you are concentrating on it otherwise it’ll stop.”

Okay, so listening to Siliphes makes me want to roll my eyes a bit.  She really is talkative in a way that Tod and George were not. And that grin on her face kind of gives me the willies.  Ugh.

That said, I now know how to get over this exhaustion, which is great.  It was one of the things Tod hadn’t covered though. I’m not sure if it’s because he hadn’t gotten that far, or if it isn’t something normally given to the new guys.  I’ll have to ask him about that later, although I suspect the former more than the later.

Well, whatever.  I now have something to do, so I allow my eyelids to droop a bit as I reach out with my mind to the area around me.  It’s surprisingly easy, given what I’ve done before. Almost instantly I’m able to feel the soul energy as well, and cannot help but smile to myself as I start tugging as much of it toward myself as I can.

The feeling of soul energy entering my body is something of a surprise.  Burning hot yet relaxing cool all at the same time. It’s definitely a little different from the feeling I had during my awakening.  Yet as soon as the soul energy passes through my muscles and bones I feel something else take over, and I cannot help but gasp out loud when the burning hot sensation is suddenly forced out of my body.  That leaves just the nice cool sensation.

“Hehe, sorry, but you have to experience that for yourself.”  Siliphes suddenly giggles, causing me to open my eyes and look at her.  Doing so while concentrating on drawing in the soul energy is somewhat difficult, but I manage.

“Your ‘Newly Dead’ perk automatically filters the soul energy you are cultivating, dear.  Cleaning it up, as it were. It can be something of a shock for the newbies, but it is a feeling you need to get used to.  You will have to be able to purify it later yourself. Right now it’s an automatic process, but later you’ll have to do it yourself.”  Siliphes explains, obviously knowing what I’m going through right now.

At the same time, I remember that Tod mentioned that himself before.  How he was jealous of the ability to purify the energy. I could see why as well.  With the process being automated, I can wholeheartedly concentrate on pulling the soul energy to me, instead of having to split my concentration on doing multiple things at once.

Still, that makes me wonder if upping my Mind or Soul stat would help the process.  As it is, what I’m actually managing to pull in could be called a small string of energy.  It feels nice, like soaking in a bath, but it definitely couldn’t be counted as a lot. At least to me.  But then again I can already tell that my physical soreness and legarthy is because my body is literally starved of energy.  I really have nothing left in my gas tank, which feels really bad.

“... thanks.”  I finally manage to croak out to Siliphes, before allowing my eyes to close all the way as I concentrate as much as I can on the soul energy.  The more I do so, the better and clearer the feeling becomes, and the more of the energy I’m able to pull toward me.

It soon becomes a small bubbling spring instead of a single line, and I almost groan out in pleasure as my body starts to relax.  That cool feeling of the soul energy passing through my body just feels way too nice, while by the time it reaches my chest it is seamlessly absorbed into my reservoir.  It’s just like mediating to regain mana… although I have no idea what mana is.

That unbidden thought and new fragment of memory jolts something inside of me though, and thus I reach out toward my soul energy.  It comes easily, pulled like a gently unwrapped string from a spool of thread as I gently direct it toward my head and into my eyes.  It’s the same process that activates my Energy Sight, only this time I’m directly throttling how much soul energy I bring to bare.

But the difference as soon as the soul energy enters my eyes is immediate.  Even through my closed eyelids, the entire world changes and becomes far more vivid and otherworldly.  Especially directly around me.

Where before I had to search for the soul energy with my mind, now I can literally see it floating about.  It’s dim, dull, and nowhere near as thick as the great mists of it in the sky, but once I can see it my grasp of it becomes far stronger.  This allows my absorption rate shoots way up as I’m able to draw it in from almost all the way across the room.

In fact, I could almost hear the soul energy cry out as it’s pulled toward me.  The sound is otherworldly and makes me open my augmented eyes, and I’m just in time to see Siliphes looking around manically, as if she never expected something like this to happen.  Neither did I, in fact. But it is really great all the same.

I mean, the soul energy is being pulled in like toward a black hole, swirling and twisting into several large streams that get swallowed up into my body at an impressive speed.  The sight of it in my magical sight is really cool to watch, so I hungrily pull in every speck I can see.

Then I see something weird.  As those streams of soul energy enter my body, a part of it is dispersed into the air around me.  Only it isn’t the light white or soft grey energy I’m absorbing. Instead it’s mottled in darker grey, black, red, and a myriad of other colors.  It’s like there’s a film surrounding my skin that prevents the different colors from entering my body.

It’s the impurities I was told about.  Only now I can really see them, and I realize that what count as ‘impurities’ are anything that isn’t pure soul energy.  The red energy, for instance, I recognize as the same ‘Demon Energy’ Tod and George have used before. The feeling of it is burning hot and raging, almost out of control.

The other forms of energy though I have no clue about.  Green, blue, yellow… almost every color of the rainbow is there, each feeling and reacting different from the next.  Except for black. Instinctively I know what that is, probably because it was the thing that really and truly granted me this unlife.  Death Energy.

For a moment I idly wonder if necromancers would love that stuff, but the thought fades as quickly as it comes while I continue to concentrate on pulling in the soul energy of nearly the entire room toward me.  Already I feel far better than I had before, but my insides still feel somewhat hollow, thus I don’t want to stop. In fact the feeling is somewhat addicting.

Then I wonder if I can split the various energies before they reach me.  The thought comes uninvited, but unlike my previous ponderings something about it just seems to light a lightbulb in my head.  No clue what a lightbulb is, but it doesn’t matter right now. Instead, I really want to see if I can do it.

Splitting my focus even more is a struggle though, to the point where my head starts to hurt again.  I ignore the feeling and the pain while reaching out to all of the soul energy I can before, before -willing- the various energies to split apart from one another.  That’s the only way I can describe it.

Which results in something of a localized explosion.  I don’t have enough concentration left over to direct my thoughts to the whole of the room, but in about a two foot area around my body everything just kind of dissolves.  All of that energy goes wild, as every other form of energy outside of the pure soul energy is forced out of the overall mixture.

A billowing cloud of dozens of different colors is spawned almost instantly, which responds in a very unexpected way.  Some of them fuse together, while others clash in a sudden ‘BOOM’! Which just aggravates the other energies. The bed I’m laying on literally breaks apart, shattered into very small pieces, while Siliphes gives a very girlish scream as she’s literally blown backward.

For all of that though I’m left untouched by it, floating there in mid-air as one explosion of energy after another echo around me.  Yet at the same time I feel a far greater influx of soul energy than before as I manage to hold my concentration through it all. I almost groan in satisfaction as I stretch out my limbs, feeling oddly unbound and powerful.

Then it’s done, my body unable to hold any more.  In that instant my concentration is severed, and everything blanks out as I fall to the floor.  The sudden jerk and painful landing makes me grunt, but the exhilarating feeling of absorbing soul energy actually makes me laugh.  It was just so great.

Well, except for the splinters of wood and shit I land on.  But hey, if that’s the price I have to pain for not being in pain or feeling like a dead body warmed over, what’s the harm?  Except Siliphes is staring at me in something akin to fear from where she’d landed on the floor a couple of feet away.

In fact just about everyone who’s awake in the entire room is staring at me as if I’m some sort of freak, and for a moment I feel rather embarrassed.  Just for a moment though, because soon enough I’m lifting myself up and standing, stretching out my body that’s finally feels good and strong for the first time since I started using all the abilities I’ve gained since waking up.

“Sorry, that was a rush.”  I say with a grin, stretching my arms above my head and feeling a satisfying crack as my back pops.  Aaah, so much better!

“That certainly was… a rush.”  Siliphes finally says as she stands herself, although she’s soon straightening her clothing absently while staring at me.  Finally on my own feet, I realize that she’s at least a head taller than I am as well.

“Most newbies definitely are overcome with the enjoyment of cultivating soul energy for the first time, but I doubt any of them were as… enthusiastic as you were.  Or even able to do what you did. Pulling the soul energy from all around the room, and then separating it around your body? I’m not sure if I should call that crazy or brilliant.”  Siliphes starts to talk again, but I’m only able to give a shrug as I look around the rest of the room.

The medical ward is a long rectangular room, lined on both walls with beds.  The various people, and I use that term lightly, are laying about and resting.  It’s a mix of zombies, skeletons, and others I cannot even identify. Many are missing limbs or other body parts.

The previous sounds I heard must have been them talking to each other, because now the room is almost dead quiet.  Mostly because they are all staring at me. Some of them even have their mouths open in stupefaction.

“Still, you were able to cultivate in a very, very short amount of time.  Even with the ‘Newly Dead’ perk, newbies take about half an hour to gain ten points of soul energy.  You have more capacity than that, and yet you were able to fill up in only minutes. Hells…” Siliphes finally brings the subject back again, and even curses a bit.

It really makes me want to grin and perhaps even gloat a little, but I push the urge down and instead arch a brow at the succubus while shrugging a shoulder.

“I can’t help you there.  It just sort of came naturally to me, although I did use Energy Sight and Soul Energy Manipulation.”  I tell her honestly, which causes some muttering from the rest of the peanut gallery, whatever that is.  “Especially the Energy Sight, which made it really easy to reach out and grasp all the soul energy in the room.”

“Well, that certainly explains some of it.  But how you are able to use those abilities like that is something I have no idea about.  That said, you have a bit of a mess to clean up.” Siliphes has a thoughtful look on her face, before she points out the fact that I’d literally caused a bit of damage.  My bed, specifically, is a total loss. It was like a giant had taken a big ass club to it. In fact there are splinters of wood all over the place.

“Uh, got a broom or something?”  Yeah, real smooth on my part there.

Thus is how I spend the next half hour or so cleaning up the medical ward.  A bit of a humbling experience, but I laugh it off after Siliphes got me that broom I requested.  Along with a set of wooden bins to toss all the trash into, of which there is quite a bit. Wooden bits from the bedframe aside, there’s also the mattress which was simply fodder stuffed inside a woven mat.  Getting up all the chaff and shit took forever. Especially with some of it being sprayed across the beds of the other patients.

That said, I did get to speak to some of the others in the meantime.  Many of them are slightly older newbies who were injured during the Scourge attack.  Others were in for injuries caused by training. Almost all of them asked questions about what I’d done, and some of them even volunteered to show off some of their own abilities.

One guy, a skeleton missing his lower left arm, showed off summoning fire that flew around above his body like a flying snake.  That was cool all on its own, and I spent a couple of minutes asking questions about that sort of magic. It was Sorcery, the use of natural energy through the exertion of will.  

And apparently his missing arm had come about when a fireball blew up too close for comfort.  He was just waiting for someone to come with a set of replacement bones. Heh. The bonehead really had it nice.

Speaking of injuries though, it seems I have a bit of my own.  My left hand, which really was hurting when I first woke up, is now missing both the pinky and ring fingers.  It looked like they were torn off, although someone had been kind enough to stitch the injuries closed after smoothing them out.  It was kind of weird while looking at them though, because I could feel a phantom sensation from them.

But that was something to think about later.  Siliphes returned a couple of minutes after I finished cleaning up, looking much happier than when she’d left.  In fact she seems to glow a bit, but outside of some perked interest I don’t feel anything else at what should be an outstandingly beautiful woman.  Hmm. Looks like I don’t have any sex drive as a dead guy.

“Glad to see that you are a hard worker.”  She says as she walks up to me, and I just shrug.  Work is work, but at least it wasn’t heavy manual labor.  Could have been worse.

“Stoic, huh?  No matter. Since you are already up and about, we’ve decided to go ahead and discharge you.  This leads us back to why you are here at the Guide’s Guild. For the next 30 days, you have free access to all of our commonly available resources.  This includes basic skill and ability training, access to the Guild’s library, and what amounts to free room and board. Which isn’t much of a hassle with you dead guys.”  Siliphes starts to explain, to which I nod.

“The Guide’s Guild’s sole mission is the rescuing and recruiting newly awakened undead in Limbo for their respective city.  We have branches in all nine major cities in Limbo, and offer the same services in all of them. Once your 30 days are up, you can sign up to work as a Guide yourself or go your own way.  Any questions?” Siliphes finally finishes her talk, and I purse my lips as several thoughts cross my mind. I skip all of that though.

“Yeah, why go through all the hassle?  I mean, why did the Guild start at all?  It seems odd that the city pays for all of this.”  I ask, trying to explain the big question that came to mind.  And for a moment it looks like Siliphes is stumped, before she bursts out laughing.

“Aah, I forgot you got interrupted during your way to the city.  You see, the undead like you aren’t able to reproduce so unlike a living city there’s no way to increase the population or keep it up at all unless we go out and initiate the awakening process for new deaders.  It’s very rare for it to happen naturally.”

Ooooh, that makes a lot more sense.  For a moment I wonder why I didn’t realize it sooner, before I remember my ridiculously low stats.  Ugh. It seems that I’m more apt to now realize what’s in front of my eyes if I stay this way much longer.  Which may be why the Guild was set up, too.

“Okay, that makes much more sense now.  Thanks. Any idea where I could find Tod, my Guide?”  I thank the succubus before asking what’s really on my mind.  I kind of miss the old red bloke, and I bet he has way more information than what Siliphes can offer.

“You are welcome, and you’re talking about that Devil?  I can’t really say. I try to stay away from others from the Hells.”  She readily takes my thanks, but then her expression somewhat sours. Which leaves me stumped, cause I have no idea why.  Thankfully she doesn’t leave me in a lurch for long, seeing the expression on my face.

“Ah, succubi are ‘rare commodities’ in the Hells.  So most of us try to escape at the earliest opportunity.  Devil’s tend to be civil, but are just as likely to try to trap us in convoluted and complex contracts all the same.  Hellions are much easier to deal with, cause they are far less intelligent. Gargoyles are stoneheads, and care little for what succubi can offer, thankfully.”  Siliphes gives an explanation that turns into another running rant, but I listen and try to remember all the bits all the same. Information is important.

“Which is why I love working here in Limbo, you know?  You dead guys don’t even bat an eye at me. It is so refreshing!  I don’t have to worry about my looks or go out of my way to charm the guys into leaving me alone.  Hell, you’ve barely looked at my curves since you woke up! Ha ha…”

Yeah, I get it now.  Siliphes definitely has her own issues to work on, but it seems she’s happy.  Almost a bit too happy, with her face having gone red and a little bit of panting thrown in at the end there.  She soon clears her throat and settles down though, as if nothing had happened. Weird woman, to say the least.

“Anyway, you are free to go.  Just stop by the front desk to get registered and receive your starting package.  And try not to get blasted to bits, ‘kay? Even I can’t put a body back together like that!”

And just like that I’m all but kicked out of the medical ward.  Then only a few minutes later I’m passing out of the wide open doors of the Guide’s Guild and out onto the streets of Helen City.  Given my previous unconscious state, I had yet to actually see the city itself, so I’m left looking around wide-eyed like a tourist when I finally do get my eyes on it.

And what I see is both surprising and yet somewhat expected.  Helen City is built out of the same black stone as found in the Plains of Corpses, for the most part, but there’s also what seems like wood and clay tiles and mortar as well.  All the colors though are in browns, greys, and black. Except for surprisingly colorful lanterns hung all over the place.

Every building I can see is at least two or three stories tall, and liberally festooned with those lanterns which are in all sorts of shapes and patterns.  Many of them look like the paper lanterns you’d find in… eastern countries? Is that right? Damn my memory. Anyway, they are colored paper wrapped around some sort of light source that doesn’t flicker like a flame would.  Others are crafted of bronze or stone, and many look like beasts or mythical creatures.

It leaves me standing there open-mouthed for a little while, but I’m soon brought out of it by a sour grunt from a large devil making his way to the door.  I quickly step to the side and give a little wave. The devil doesn’t even say anything, rushing into the Guild. Rude.

Still, my attention is brought back to the city, but honestly I have no idea where I am or where I am going.  The things I was given inside are less than helpful in that way, as well. A change of clothing, a big leather sack, and a small bag of 50 shards and some coinage.  Twenty copper coins and a single silver coin. It seems pretty generous, but I remember what Todd was telling me about how the currency actually works around here. All over the place, that is.

That was all though.  I could have stuck around and asked for training or the like, but really after all the ‘excitement’ I’m quite ready for something more normal.  Spending my time in a library right now just doesn’t sound good. Neither does being put through a ringer with a bunch of skill trainers either.

Which is why I’m looking around like some tourist while basically scratching my head.  Except now a blinking V symbol in my vision finally catches my attention. It’s vague and very nearly transparent, but it finally manages to catch my attention.

 

[-Personal Statistics-]

[Name: -Locked-][Titles: None][Status: Civilian]

[Racial Type: Dead | Zombie][Rank: F | Level: 1]

[Soul Energy (SE): 18/18 (+)][Soul Points (SP): 5 (-Locked-)]

[Body: 1/3 | +1 (10 SE)][Mind: 1/3 | +1 (10 SE)][Soul: 1.3 | +1 (10 SE)]

[Feats: Over-Sight - Rank III. (14/40)(UP!); Terror Resistance - Rank I. (23/25)(NEW!); Exhaustion Resistance - Rank V. (110/125)(NEW!)]

[Abilities: Energy Sight - Rank VI. (63/150)(UP!); Inspect - Rank II. (1/50); Charge - Rank II. (3/50)(NEW!)]

[Skills: Soul Energy Manipulation - Rank III. (58/75)(UP!); Energy Manipulation - Rank II. (4/50)(NEW!); Concentration - Rank II. (14/50)(NEW!); Cultivation - Rank I. (43/100)(NEW!)]

[Perks: Newly Dead][Detriments: Newly Dead]

 

[-Message Log-]

[Newly Dead Perk activated.]

[You are no longer exhausted.]

[Cultivation skill learned!]

[Concentration skill learned!]

[Energy Manipulation skill learned!]

[Partial Feat performed: Accidental Purification!]

[+1 maximum Soul Energy.]

[Over-Sight feat has leveled up! (x2)]

[Energy Manipulation has leveled up!]

[Concentration has leveled up!]

[Newly Dead Perk deactivated!]

[You are no longer recuperating.]

[Concentration: Log Saved.]

 

Whoah!  Damn the Pits, it looks like everything has changed as my status pops up followed by my message log.  I’d totally forgotten about those, to be honest. But it looks like the Voice has noticed, because I could almost feel the sarcasm from here.  Especially at the very end, with the ‘log saved’ thing. Ugh.

That said, I am glad that things are a bit more full on my status.  The new skills, abilities, and feats all look good. Sadly that means I’m going to have to check them all out later, cause I have only a vague idea of which does what.  Especially the difference between ‘Soul Energy Manipulation’ and ‘Energy Manipulation’. My quick and dirty hypothesis on that one is the difference from when I separated out all those other energies when I was cultivating earlier.  Which is easily to say, given all the explosions it caused. Heh. That makes it rather memorable, even by my standards.

“Excusssse me, but aresss yousss interested in a guidesss to the city?”  A sudden voice breaks me out of my mental tangles, and I quickly end up having my eyes drawn down to where the voice is coming from.

What I find there, standing barely two feet or so off the ground is a giant rat.  A rat standing on hind legs, at that. With matted black furr, and a very slim but skin-scale covered tail that’s probably two or three times longer than he is long.  With big buck teeth.

Normally this is where I’d likely scream in horror or some such, generally, but all I feel is some mild curiosity to the furried man.  Which thankfully is a far better form of introduction than any number of the ‘freak out’ intention others may have. That said, the rat guy really looks like he’s seen better days than what he’s been going through.  He’s rather… dirty, to put it gently.

“Actually yeah, I could.  I was carted into the city unconscious during the Scourge attack, so I know absolutely nothing about the city itself.”  I tell the small fellow, whom is actually kind of twitchy. Likely afraid of being kicked away or something, if I had to take a guess.  “I’m also a newly awakened, so I know nothing about the other races around here either.”

That bit of honesty on my part seems to breath a sigh of relief from the rat guy, as his whiskers visibly perk up.  It’s almost cute, in a twisted little dog sort of way. Only it’s a walking, talking rat. Yeah, I’ll leave the mental image there as he starts to bounce a little from foot to foot.

“Yessss, I sussspected as much.  Youssss new guysss alwaysss have that blank looksss after leaving the Guild.”  The rat guy says, motioning behind me with one of his clawed paws. His claws are yellowed and chipped though.

“I be’sss Tresk, and be’sss a Kriti, an evolution of the commonsss city ratsss, yesss.”  He finally introduces himself, and gives something of a bobbing nod that may have been a bow, but I cannot really tell.  The fact that he’s an evolution of species of rat makes sense, but at the same time it really leaves me a bit stumped. Even rats can evolve here?  That’s almost crazy.

“Ah, a pleasure to meet you, Tresk.”  I say after a moment, having to jerk my attention back to the matter at hand, again.  My mind really likes to wander, ugh. “I haven’t unlocked my name yet, so call me whatever you’d like.  Also, what would it cost to get a tour of Helen City?”

I move the subject along, because I really don’t want cause any issues by putting my foot in my mouth.  George covered that rather nicely before, but I don’t want to turn into comedian or the like. Social graffs aren’t a subject I’m interested in, thank you very much.  I’m also getting better at ignoring those strange thoughts, as well. Trying to keep my head from exploding like an overfull tick really adds some determination there.

“Ah, yessss.  I will just call yousss ‘customer’, yesss.”  Tresk seems somewhat surprised, although I don’t know why, but he quickly picks back up.  “And I’ssss will take whatever yousss are willing to offer, yesss. Being a Kriti leavesss onesss without optionsss for paying worksss.”

Okay, I get the feeling that Tresk is trying to explain something there, but those really long ‘s’ sounds he makes through his toothy maw require me a few moments to process.  It’s like… hell, I don’t know how to explain it. It’s just weird. Like talking to a foreigner who hasn’t gotten the local language down yet.

Still, if Tresk is that hard up for paying work then I imagine that things are quite bad for the Kriti in general.  Which isn’t a stretch, since they are evolved rats. I imagine they are like goblins… which for the life of me I cannot help but remember.  Ugh. Green skinned bastards, right? Well, whatever. All that said, I could use the help and connections are never a bad thing.

Which is why I pull my little coin purse out of where I’d stuffed it in my shirt, and pull out a whole ten Shards.  Probably a bit much, maybe, but this could be a good thing. I know literally nothing about Helen City, Limbo in general, or the wider world at all.  And this is a chance to build a working relationship with what is no doubt the seedy underground of this city. Which is already underground, but that’s beside the point.

“Here, Tresk.  I’d like for you to guide me around the city and it’s major landmarks.”  I say with a smile, holding out the shards in my hand. The Kriti stares at the shards with wide eyes, and even I can recognize the disbelief on his face.  Heh. It looks quite amusing, truth be told.

“I’m not sure if this counts as a lot of pay, but I don’t have a whole lot of coin or shards right now.  That said, I may have more work for you later, so think of this as a retainer for your services. The one thing I do know is that I’m going to need a lot of information about Helen City, important people, cultivating and probably everything else.”

I don’t bother to hide my intent, which seems to wake the Kriti up.  He nearly jumps up to snatch the shards from my hand, while jerking his head around as if worried about being seen or observed.  I probably should be more careful too, but there isn’t anyone around at the moment. In fact the streets are oddly empty right now.

“Yesss, of courssse.  Tresk thankssss yousss much.”  Tresk slips the shards away before all but bowing to the ground, but I wave him off such platitudes.  Or at least I would have, if the little guy hadn’t grabbed my hand suddenly before pulling me toward the nearest dark alley across the street from the Guide’s Guild.

In fact, his grip is far stronger than I would have suspected, and I almost lose my feet as he tugs me into almost a run into the darkness between two fairly large multistory buildings.  For how small the little guy is, he’s rather fast as well as strong. Maybe it’s a racial thing, or just that his stats are stronger than I would have thought. Thankfully the light jog I’m forced into doesn’t bother me at all, although the fugitive way Tresk continues to look around worries me just a bit.

At least until we are well into the alley, which is surprisingly clean but dark.  Probably only a couple feet from wall to wall, the ground is still paved in black stone, but there isn’t any debris or muck like I would have suspected.  In fact it just seems like a bit of unused space between two different properties, closed up at the far end with another wall.

The far wall, which Tresk pulls me all the way toward.  And then he lets go of my hand, and suddenly he’s standing upright to his full height.  I hadn’t realized he’d been bent over or anything before, but the straight-backed stance really does give him a different air, even if he’s still just as dirty as before.

“Tresk thanks you, customer.”  Okay, and he talks way better now, too.  That surprise must have been seen on my face, because Tresk actually starts to laugh a little in a rumbling way.

“I apologize for the deception, but Kriti are not very welcome within Helen City.  We are… tolerated, so to say, but generally disdained because of our relationship with our lesser kin.”  Tresk explains after his laughter has come to an end, although that smooth way of speaking now still somewhat gets to me.  It’s like he’s become a totally different person, and I have no idea what to think of it.

“Okay, I get that bigots are found everywhere, but why the secrecy?”  I finally manage to ask after a moment of gathering my thoughts. I’m really not sure if my random act of kindness or the job offer is a good thing now or not.  That, and I’m now in the end of a dark alleyway with a guy who is far stronger than I am.

“Well, that’s a bit involved.  We Kriti often offer our services to new guys, as well as other enterprises around the city.  Part of that is just to make money, of course, but we Kriti are also about making connections.  Rats are rather social creatures, and it is a trait that continues in the Kriti even after the evolution.”  That’s something I can follow, so I nod to show that I’m keeping up.

“Kriti as a whole are not a combat suitable race.  This leaves many others dissatisfied with us as a whole.  But where we are disadvantaged in that sphere of influence, we make excellent merchants, information brokers, spies, and thieves.  This leaves Kriti as a whole with an even more poor reputation, and thus we are forced to be very careful when we move about in public.  Thus my poor performance earlier, for which I do apologize.”

Tresk actually gives a real, smooth bow then, complete with a clawed hand over his chest; although even I can tell there’s a bit of a smile on his whiskered and furred face.  I’m not sure if it’s a racial thing there, but the guy really does seem to be a great actor. Or a spy, thief, or something else all together. I simply am unable to tell.

“Now, we specifically greet the newly awakened in order to take measure of them.  This is both to keep records, similar to what the Guide’s Guild does, but also to check out their personality traits as it may apply to the Kriti.  Being kicked away for being a ‘dirty rat man’ is no fun, I can assure you.” Yeah, I could totally get why Tresk’s voice would be dry about that.

“Those that are aggressive or disdainful are put on our blacklists, and thus no other Kriti will willingly approach them.  If they later find their way to us for one matter or another, we will welcome them as customers but charge a premium for our services.”  Tresk stops there, glancing around again before stepping over to the wall. Then he rubs his hand against a stone that I can barely tell is sticking out a little.

A bit of dust is scraped off the stone, revealing a rather deeply engraved circular mark in the otherwise smooth black stone.  If I didn’t know any better, I could have sworn it was a Thieves’ Mark, although why that term came to mind I have no idea about.  Another loose memory, no doubt. Sadly that’s all that bubbles up to the surface, which makes me grimace a little.

“This is our mark, denoting a safe place for business.  As you are already a paying customer, then this is a show of our appreciation.”  Tresk says then, giving a rather toothy grin as he looks back at me.

On the other hand I was actually taking the time to remember the mark engraved in the stone, and even reach up to touch it.  It’s completely smooth to the touch, without any rough edges or grit at all. In fact I could faintly feel the energy that had made it, as if it had been done by magic.

“Inspect…”  I mutter gently under my breath, not sure if it would work or not, and thus a little surprised when another blue box opens up in front of my eyes.

 

[Kriti Shadow Mark - Merchant]

[One of several types of Shadow Mark’s developed by the Kriti, this one denotes a place where trades, barters, and deals are made.  Safety is guaranteed around the area of the Shadow Mark.]

 

Wow, okay so that’s kind of cool.  And it seems that this is only one type of mark the Kriti deploy.  I’m actually a bit curious about the others, but that’ll have to wait for later.

“Oh, a bit of a surprise there, although it shouldn’t have been, I guess.  Tobias is a rather odd devil after all.” Tresk probably was able to hear my word, but I simply smile a little when he talks about Tod.  Good to know the man has a reputation. I can probably track him down with that.

“True enough, and thanks for showing me this.” I say then, pleased with having already learned something that is probably quite valuable.

“Most welcome.  Now, onto business.  You are a ‘newbie’, as others like to put it, and thus have no experience here in Limbo.  You also don’t have any stats yet, which from what I saw with the Scourge attack yesterday is easily explained.”  Tesk starts to say, even as one of his hands comes up so he can tap a claw against his short muzzle. It was like the thinking posture others would take, no doubt.

“You wish to hire the Kriti for information, and information is valuable.  Your show of kindness though is rather appreciated, and it would definitely be nice to have another ‘friend’ of the Kriti around.  So I’ll be upfront and give you something of value here.” Tresk says then, and while I can definitely hear the humor in his voice, his tone is strict and to the point.  Just like what you’d expect from a merchant. One that could swindle me rather badly, at that.

Still, his ‘offer’ is enticing, even more so when he pulls to be a simple stone ring out of seemingly thin air.  It was like a magic trick, given the Kriti is wearing what is basically soiled rags on his body. There’s like nowhere for anything to go, from what I can see.  Which makes me realize that I hadn’t seen what he’d done with the shards I’d handed him earlier.

“This little lovely is a Ring of Inventory, although of the poorest rank.  It has a five-by-five cubed feet space inside of it, used to store objects and items of any size that’ll fit.  All except living things anyway. Storage for living alchemical substances and herbs cannot be placed inside of it.”  Tresk says, before tossing it to me.

I actually fumble a bit in catching it, chagrined at my lack of agility in doing so.  But at least I do snatch it out of the air before it hits the ground. Which is likely a good thing, given what Tresk was just saying about the ring.  I can imagine that it is rather expensive, even for being the lowest rank.

Once the ring is in my hand though I can feel the magical charge on it, and a slightly cool sensation against the skin of my hand.  It actually feels a little comforting, oddly enough. Especially when I slip it onto one of my fingers, granting me access into the space inside the ring with just a thought.

The inside is empty and dark, except for a single sheet of thick folded parchment.  A single thought pulls the parchment out of the ring and into my hand, almost feeling like the flip of a switch.  Except it’s just a feeling, and there’s no sound or light about it.

“Good.  Now, that is the real thing you have purchased, dear customer.”  Tresk says then, still smiling while nodding his head. He really does seem to be in a good mood.

“That is a full map of Helen City and its immediate surroundings.  It is lightly enchanted, granting it several useful features, although in truth they are only a poor imitation of the much more expensive ‘Travelers’ Map’.  It is, however, the perfect thing for what you are looking for at this time.”

Okay, so I was barely listening to Tresk at that point after he said ‘map of Helen City’.  In fact I was almost afraid to rip the damned thing when I pulled it open, causing it to unfold and unfold and unfold some more.  It was a full map indeed, and big enough that I had to spread my arms to hold it all up.

The detail was great, even in the dim light here in the alleyway.  Helen City itself is a giant circle in the middle of a vast empty plain, constructed in concentric circles toward the Keeper’s Tower in the dead center.  Almost like a bullseye, actually.

But outside of just the physical appearance of the city spread across the parchment of the map, there is also the information.  Small blue boxes denoting the names of buildings, institutions, and features of the city. I’m quickly able to find the Guide’s Guild amongst it all, and focusing on it’s name opens up a slightly bigger box with a short description of the Guild itself.

“Wow.”  Is all I can basically say, because this map is freakin’ awesome.  Besides being really big, it’s jammed packed with all sorts of information.  Almost mind boggling.

“Haha!  Yes, most people have the same response.  Even those whom have lived in Helen City for a while.  The city is big, and that’s saying something. I think the last census placed the population at around four million residents and nearly half again regular visitors a century ago or so.”  Tresk really seemed to get a kick out of my reaction, but I’m not complaining. It’s good to know that others have a sense of humor around here. Dull, grey, and boring is the usual motto for the dead, after all.

“Okay, we are just outside of the Guide’s Guild, which isn’t too far from the Keeper’s Tower.  Nearby you also have the Warrior’s Conclave, the Wizard’s Tower, and the Merchant’s Association.  Those are the three big guilds in the city. But there are many more smaller specialized groups as well.  Many of them are authorized guilds of their own, like the Adventurer’s Guild and the Smithing Guild.”

Tresk starts giving me a quick run-down of the important groups and places, even going so far as to have me hold the big map up against the alley wall so as to point them out to me.  And there’s a lot of stuff to point at. Too bad I don’t an extra hand, or a dozen. Hah.

What it all boils down to though is that just about every profession, group of skilled individuals, and big family clans have their own guild, association, or society.  The Kriti Merchant Collective, for instance, is the sole sovereign entity for the race of Kriti in Helen City. And they fall outside of the Merchant’s Association.

Tresk had to explain that bit to me, but it seems that the all formally established groups carry influence in various ways.  And they use that influence to strengthen themselves, make deals with others, or claim resources from outside the city’s walls.  Thus the groups, big and small, often fight with each either. The competition can be quite bad.

That said, there are only two big groups that do not fight for influence.  The first is the Guide’s Guild, which is solely owned by the city itself. It is completely non-political, and thus is one of the best liked factions in Helen City.  The other is the city itself, run out of a city hall complex called the Helen Throne. It’s the main political and administrative heart of the entire domain, and no one in their right mind would challenge it.  Publically, at least.

When it comes to the Patrolmen and the Helen City Army, things get a bit weird.  Neither are established guilds or groups, and yet they hold both great power and political sway.  Especially the Patrolmen, who deal solely with keep security and crime within the city to a manageable level.  They deal with crime, and hold the sole court for the city under their jurisdiction. Only the Throne, the current ruler of Helen City, can gainsay the court.

The Helen City Army on the other hand deals with territorial matters, including defense and patrolling the many small villages and groups within the territory Helen City has claimed.  It really was like a medieval society in that manner. That said, criminals dealt with by the Army have to be handed over to the city’s Patrolmen to face judgement. The Army does not have a court of its own.

By this point though my head is already spinning.  It’s just too much information to keep track of right now.  Thankfully Tresk is thoughtful on that matter, offering up a grin of apology and once more mentioning my low stats.  This is only my second day of being un-alive, after all.

“Well, enough of the political stuff then.  I’m sure you’d like to get settled here soon, and start working toward becoming something other than a regular zombie, yes?”  Tresk finally brings the topic back around, to which I nod a couple of times to.

“Yes, please.  I really have no idea where to go or what to do now.   The Wizard’s Tower sounds like it’d be something I’d be interested in, given my energy manipulation skills, but from the sound of it it is not a good starting point.”  I explain my thoughts on the matter, to which Tresk nods and tugs on his own whiskers in thought.

“That is definitely true.  I highly doubt you’d want to be stuck in a binding contract for two centuries while being worked like slave labor to a bunch of liches.”  Yeah, even I can hear the repulsion in Tresk’s words. It seems to be a big gripe with the Tower, which I can totally agree with.

“Hmm, hmm…  Ah, I know!”  Tresk almost yells after seeming to finally think of something.  I get the feeling he isn’t used to having to put too much thought into matters, given his blatant intelligence.  But then again the social structure of Helen City is just that complicated.

“Here.” Tresk then points to the map, showing a small place near the western edge of the city wall.  The name pops up as well on the map, saying it’s the ‘Silver Key Magic Society’.

“The Silver Key is a small magic-based society outside of the Wizard’s Tower control.  They don’t specialize in any specific magical practice, and are always looking for new members.  Their society leader is a Silver Lord, a type of zombie who specializes in magical research. Sadly he’s more apt at administration than magical theory and study, but is rather open-minded and welcoming to those starting out.  He’s also rather friendly to the Kriti, so the Silver Key would make a good place for you.”

Okay, so I have no idea what a Silver Lord is, but the rest of that sounds like a good idea.  That and being a group on good terms with the Kriti sounds like a good thing to me. Heh. So far Tresk has been nothing but helpful, although I’m partially sure it’s just part of his penchant for being a merchant.

“Also, I do believe he’d be quite willing to take you in after your accident in the Guide’s Guild medical ward.”  Then Tresk throws me a curve ball, and I’m left standing there blinking at him like an idiot. Just…

“... how do you even know of that?!”  Okay, I really don’t mean to yell, but the surprise is just that much.  Like, it hadn’t even happened an hour ago or so!

“Hahahahaha!  A total newbie, during his first time cultivating, nearly blows himself up because he was playing with forces and energy he didn’t understand!  Hahaha. It was real fun to watch, by the way.” Tresk laughs at me, almost holding his belly as he does so before he points to the top of the back wall of the alleyway.

I follow his pointing claw, and notice a large black rat sitting on top of the wall.  For a moment I don’t notice anything, before I find myself staring at the rats’ two large eyes.  Eyes that are a very vivid, and seemingly glowing green. You almost wouldn’t spot it unless it was looking right at you though.

“Aaah, excuse me.”  Tresk finally gets his amusement under control after a few moments.  “Aah, that is one of the city rats currently under a spirit contract with a Kriti.  You can tell with the green eyes. They act similar to a summoned familiar of a wizard or the like, allowing us to see and hear through their senses.  It is one of the main tools of the Kriti trade, so I would kindly ask you not to go sharing that information.”

Tresk has calmed down, but I end up nodding and agreeing to keep that information to myself.  Especially when I point out that I could ask such a rat to meet with the Kriti if I ever needed to.  Tresk definitely agreed, and seemed happy to offer such a service as required, although he did point out that I may not be able to get in contact with Tresk himself.

I was quite fine with that myself, as I doubt Tresk himself specializes in all the things the other Kriti could offer.  They did however seem to share a very communal sort of life, so being in the good books of one means that all the others will know sooner or later.  Which is a good thing, at least for me.

“Now, the rats here in Helen City typically have red eyes.  Green eyes like that little ones’ show the mark of being bound.  If you ever run into a rat with black eyes though, run. Run as fast as you can to the nearest patrolman or army soldier you can find.”  Tresk then says, in a far more serious voice.

“Black eyes on a rat often means it is Scourge Infected, which makes them bigger, meaner, and stronger than other rats.  And infectious all on its own. The Kriti constantly hunt for such blighted rats, a service we perform for the city. But finding one anywhere needs to be reported quickly.  Especially after the Scourge attack yesterday.”

Okay, yeah.  I could definitely get behind that policy.  Especially after remembering the attack myself.  Just thinking of those black chains makes me shudder a bit while my left hand pulses with a bit of phantom pain.

“The Scourge…  I’m not able to say much about it, sadly.  But what I can tell you is that the Scourge effects the living and the dead in different ways.  Those that are dead end up having their Soul Energy stripped from them, which is called Scourge Poisoning.  The living however end up Scourge Blighted, which can cause uncontrollable mutations and spread like a disease.  A disease that grows stronger with every living being it infects.”

Yeah, I definitely shudder at the thought that Tresk just put into my head.  The Scourge itself sounds like a bad deal, and what it does is even worse. I’m happy that my body isn’t living, because I may have lost my lunch otherwise.  Ugh.

In fact, the mental disgust I have for the Scourge is way stronger than should be possible given my state of un-living.  Not even the blood and gore I witnessed during the Scourge attack got a rise out of me of such strength. It was like… Hm.  How to explain? Like everybody in Limbo wanted the Scourge erased. It is that strong of a compulsion.

I shake the feeling from my head though while fighting down the dread, horror, and disgust in my guts.  Once more I’m happy that I don’t have a gag reflex, although I am left somewhat gasping for breath. Tresk seems concerned, but just waits for me to catch myself, to which I’m thankfully.

“It’s okay lad.  Everyone has a different reaction when meeting the Scourge for the first time.  Sadly the memory is slow to fade, but it’ll get better with time.” Tresk says then, which explains a few things.  And somewhat ticks me off, because no one else mentioned the -other- side effects. Just great.

“Okay, thanks, Tresk.”  I finally say, straightening up before putting a somewhat wane smile on my lips.  Strong front and all of that, although it leaves me keenly aware of the fact that I am really a newbie here.  A newbie in power, and a newbie in life. Or as much life as possible in Limbo.

“Now, on to easier topics.  When you get to the Silver Key Magic Society, ask for Archmagus Silver.  That’s the societies’ leaders ‘public name’. If asked, just say that Merchant Tresk sent you his way.  I’ll send one of my rats to inform him that you are coming.” Tresk manages to keep a straight face while listing out his instructions, but when he says that he’s going to ‘inform him’ that I was coming I get an odd feeling in the pit of my stomach.  Which, in turn, lead me to glare at the smaller Kriti.

“And inform the Silver Lord about my magical debacle?”  Okay, so maybe there’s a bit too much spite in my words there, but everyone seems highly amused about my incident.  It was like I’d become an idiot celebrity or something. Not a good reputation to have, I assure you.

“Why of course!  It is amusing, after all.  Haha.” Tresk comes right out and says it, leaving me to sigh somewhat forlornly.  Ugh.

“Well, that and to let Silver know that you have quite a bit of skill in the area of energy manipulation.  Which is the core of all but the most ritualistic magical practices, by the way. Being able to expertly and precisely control energy will allow you to cast magic faster and have stronger effects.  It’ll also let you carve runes, create long-lasting and powerful enchantments, and any number of other things.

“The fact that you actually didn’t blow yourself up in the meantime really shows off what you could potentially do.  Researching new spells and skills typically are done in warded chambers that restrict the amount of energy inside of them, allowing for experimentation with a far lower risk of things exploding when they go wrong, you understand.  Once your thirty days of Newly Dead are up, you could become quite powerful that way since you could rapidly gain a number of professional level skills. Even I’m a bit excited to see what you could do.”

Wow, I didn’t expect Tresk to be the sort to become so talkative, but it’s good to know that I have a fan.  Especially since he does seem to have way more experience in discerning the potential of others than anyone I’d met yet.  Well, except for maybe Tod, but the devil didn’t mention anything in that direction.

“Okay, okay, I get it.  I’ll live with being the brunt of everyone's jokes for a while.  Then I’ll blow something important up and no one will laugh again.”  Yes, maybe a little surly of me, but for some reason that sort of attention just really seems to tick me off.  Probably a bit of my past life coming back to haunt me.

“That’s the spirit.  Anyway, off you go. Just make sure you memorize the route, so you don’t have to pull out that map.  Many people would want to get their hands on it. And it was a pleasure to serve you, customer.” Tresk starts to shoo me off with that, but I wave it off with a chuckle and a farewell.  This definitely isn’t the last time I’m going to end up meeting Tresk of the Kriti, that’s for sure.

But now I have a direction and a potential future home.  Or at least a place to stay for a while. Helen City is already huge, with far more people than I would have expected.  The lands of Limbo are likely far bigger, and yet there are still the Realms of Hell right next door, figuratively speaking.  This un-life of mine is just starting, and at least for the moment I’m quietly looking forward to it.

 

 

 

Testing	testing	test	test	test
	Wow, okay.  So maybe it will work~
Just	Have	to	Keep	Experimenting.
Test again~
	Hmmm.
Not	Going	to	Work.	Ugh.