There she was, standing at the precipice of glory and porcelain. Staring at the masterpiece before her, she knew this was her moment, her time take control of her own destiny

 

"I'm about to block this bitch like the Suez canal" she whispered.

 

With a movement of her hand and a thunderous roar her time here was done, she slowly climbed out the window and scaled down the side of her ex's house.

 

That bitch would finally have to deal with her shit.

 

Olivia pulled out her phone and texted her best friend 

 

 Message to - Ash

O: It’s done…

A: NO FUCKING WAY

O: Yes fucking way

A: HOLY SHIT

O: You’re damn right it was!

A: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

A: Seriously tho, proud of you. Go find a cute girl who thinks the sun shines out of your ass

O: Did you just…..

A: XD XD XD yes

 

It had been quite the year for Olivia, she had met the woman of her dreams, gotten a new job and things were going great. That is until the “Woman of her dreams” became the woman of her nightmares. After months of gaslighting, possessiveness and toxic behavior came bubbling to the surface, she decided to end things. Unfortunately instead of being an adult about it, her now ex tried to pass everything off on Olivia and refused to deal with it. So here we are, single and not emotionally ready to mingle. 

 

This seemed like the best time to do what she always did when she needed some comfort, get absolutely lost in the sauce. The sauce of course being enough espresso to make a mammoth jittery, with a splash of cream. 

 

The Corner Café, it was her favorite spot. Nothing calmed her more than stepping inside and being blasted in the face by the revitalizing aroma of freshly ground coffee, which was comparable to the feeling of finally escaping this flesh prison and fighting god. 

 

“Good morning Olivia.” A cheery soft voice rang out from behind the counter.

 

Oh gods, she was working today, Madison. Olivia’s face lit up as she nervously waved hi while getting in line. Madison had only been working there a couple months but after the first time they met she had memorized Olivia’s name and within a week, her usual order. Not that it was a complicated order but still.  But that’s just because she’s really good at her job, at least, that’s what Olivia had told herself while simultaneously memorizing what days Madison was usually working. 

 

Lost in thought Olivia found herself at the counter face to face with her low key crush. Look at her, standing there with all her gorgeous blonde hair and freckles, her pride pins firmly on display, the artistically adorable handwriting on her name tag. 

 

Olivia realized there had been a silence lasting a little too long, luckily for her Madison broke it. 

 

“So, the usual?” Madison asked, waiting to type in the order on the POS system.

 

“Actually, can I get six ristretto shots with a little bit of cream?” Olivia's voice was a bit restrained.

 

“Oh, sure, what's wrong?” Madison looked at her with a concerned smile.

 

“What do you mean?” Olivia stammered a bit, how did she know?!

 

Madison looked back down at the POS and started typing in the order, “Usually when you order that much espresso you stand over there with a look on your face that says, I have grown weary of this corporeal realm and its inhabitants. So I generally assume it means you’re sad about something. It's also almost 2pm and that's a lot of caffeine."

 

Is it possible to keyboard smash in an in person conversation? Because if so, Olivia was doing her best impression of one. 

 

On one hand, Olivia had never felt so seen and understood, on the other, she had never been so fucking called out in her entire life. 

 

"D..hgh..um, yeah, I recently got out of a bad relationship." Olivia's face was only a few shades lighter than her maroon jacket.

 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry." Madison looked down at the POS then shot a look at her coworker behind the mastrena before looking back at Olivia. "Hey, my shift ends in 15 minutes, would you wanna hang out, maybe go for a walk and take your mind off things?"

 

Unable to formulate any coherent thought much less a sentence, Olivia simply nodded and fumbled for her wallet to pay. 

 

"Don't worry about it." Madison smiled, "It's on me." 

 

Without trying to seem like an even bigger disaster, Olivia managed a meek "Thank you." Then stepped away from the counter and sat at a small table to wait.

 

Message to - Ash

O: So you're not going to believe this, but I'm about to go hang out with the barista from CC

A: Madison?!...jfc that was fast!

O: What do you mean? She just noticed I seemed down and like, wants to be nice.

A: *facepalm* so the super cute girl you have a not so secret crush on literally noticed you were sad and wants to "hang out" and you think it's just cause she's nice?

O: ...yes

A: I'm fucking dead

 

Twenty minutes of meme scrolling and downing enough shots to fuel a linebacker later Madison was off work and came to greet Olivia. 

 

"Fuck I'm gay." Olivia thought.

 

It was true, Olivia did have a crush on her, and Madison standing there wearing a cute olive green beanie with her gorgeous blonde hair framing her face like the work of art it was, wasn't helping. Not to mention her denim jacket with a button that said "Pride was a riot" in blue, pink and white letters was a clear indicator she was way cooler than Olivia could ever hope to be. So obviously she was only taking pity on her by inviting her to hang out.

 

"You ready to go?" Madison had dropped her high pitched customer service voice and was now speaking with her actual voice which Olivia swore could only belong to an ethereal deity hellbent on breaking her brain. 

 

"Yeah!" Olivia said with a bit more enthusiasm than she intended, "I mean, yeah. Where are we going?" She corrected herself.

 

"There's this really cute park nearby, I always love walking around and admiring all the flowers and plants. It calms me down when I'm upset. So, I thought it might work for you too." 

 

A short walk later they found themselves at East End Park.

 

Olivia was sure she hit her head and died at some point this morning, because there was no way any of this was actually real right? Here she was, walking through a beautiful garden in a park with the Barista who made her feel like the butterflies that feed from these flowers. 

 

"This really is a beautiful sight." Olivia said gazing upon the flora and some cute squirrels nearby.

 

"It really is." Madison said staring, one would say straight at Olivia, but at this point nothing in either of their lives was straight.

 

They continued walking for some time, appreciating the scenery. Olivia turned to Madison, "I can see why you like coming here, it's so calm and peaceful."

 

Madison smiled, "I always walk around here to decompress after work, it gets stressful and I just need a place to get rid of my murderous intent." 

 

"M...murderous intent?" 

 

"Don't worry, you're safe….for now." Madison giggled and leaned in close enough for Olivia to start shaking. Whether it was out of fear, excitement, or a caffeine induced anxiety attack, no one will ever know. 

 

"Oh no, your shaking. Are you cold?" Madison placed both her hands over Olivia's and brought her in closer to help warm her up.

 

Olivia wasn't sure if her heart was vibrating at such a rapid speed it had transcended space and time, or if it had just come to a complete stop. Either way she was now certain she was indeed dead.

 

Seeing Olivia's face now fully matching her jacket, Madison thought it might be time for a change of pace.

 

"What are your plans for the rest of the day?" Madison asked.

 

In reality her plans were to binge watch her favorite show, gorge herself on pizza and cry until 2am. But she couldn't exactly just say that, at least not to someone as cool and Madison.

 

"Probably just binge watch my favorite show, gorge myself on pizza and cry until 2am." Fuck.

 

She expected Madison to either laugh, tease her, or simply walk away. Instead she just looked at her with a face full of understanding. How could anyone be this fucking cute and cool.

 

"Come with me, it's too cold out." Madison grabbed her hand and led her on another adventure. 

 

The Bent Spine, Madison's favorite used book store. It was the type of place you could spend hours getting lost in. On several occasions she had found some of the greatest books she had ever read that helped her regain hope in humanity, other times she found the stupidest pieces of literature ever recorded, that made her lose said hope. No matter what she never left quite the same as when she came in. 

 

"This place is amazing!" Olivia was admiring the aged oak bookshelves and caught the smell of the leather reading chairs and couches, it smelled like comfort. 

 

She looked back at Madison, her face illuminated by the soft lighting in the store, her entire being seemed to emit warmth and she had gotten even more beautiful the longer the day went on. "Why'd you bring me here?" Olivia finally said once she realized she had been staring into Madison's radiant smoky blue eyes.

 

"There's something I want to show you." She grabbed Olivia's hand once more and brought her to a small nook in the back of the shop. There was a corner shelf filled with grey and brown nameless works, but a single blue spine was peeking out on the lower right hand corner.  

 

Madison pulled it from the shelf and handed it to Olivia, “This is a special book, I want you to take a look at it.” 

 

Olivia looked over the front and back, aside from it being hardcover and a bright sky blue there were no other indicators as to what type of book it was. She opened the cover and inscribed on the first page was “For what you can’t say out loud, release yourself here and be free.” 

 

She flipped through the pages, there were dozens of names, dates and passages. Every page told someone’s story, who they were, what they were going through, what they needed to say but couldn’t. Every page was stained with tears, even the one with Madison's name on it. 

 

Olivia looked up at her, the knowing and understanding finally all made sense. Madison reached into her jacket pocket and handed Olivia a pen. “It’s your turn now.” Madison gave a soft smile.

 

They sat together in the corner as Olivia poured her heart into the page. While she was writing she thought about how much like this book she was. Bright, happy, unassuming on the surface, but so much more underneath. The kind of scars and damage you would only notice if you looked hard enough. The bent edges, stained corners, thread from the sewn on felt ever so slightly coming undone. You sometimes never truly feel seen, but it didn’t mean you were alone. 

 

Olivia closed the book and wiped her face, not even realizing she had been leaning against Madison this whole time. “What happens now?” she asked.

 

“Now we put it there for the next person to find, and you move forward.” Madison’s warm glow made Olivia want to melt into a puddle.

 

Olivia placed the book back on the shelf and they made their way to the front of the store. Madison was holding her hand and Olivia’s caffeine high must've finally worn off, because her heart was pounding away at her chest like she owed it money.

 

“So, what kind of pizza do you like?” Madison stopped and turned to her.

 

This was it, this was the defining moment, the fateful question that had destroyed so many homes and lives by simply existing. Yet, the true testament to any bond.

 

“Ham and pineapple.” Olivia turned her gaze to the floor, awaiting the sheer disgust and hatred followed by crippling rejection. 

 

“How dare you!” Madison scoffed, “Forget to add on cheese stuffed crust.” 

 

Oliva’s eyes widened as she lifted her head to see the most elegantly sculpted smirk on Madison's face. 

 

“I know a place.” she said and whisked Olivia away once again.

 

Turns out, the place was a hole in the wall pizza joint that just so happened to be 3 floors down from Madison's apartment. Once they had their controversial meal in hand, the two made their way upstairs. 

 

“I can’t believe this is your favorite show.” Madison was staring in disbelief at the tv screen.

 

“I know it’s a kids show, but listen, it’s wholesome, it’s pretty, and its gay. What more could you possibly want.” Olivia firm in her decision of choosing a show aimed for teens as her favorite of all time because of the friends to enemies to girlfriends trope. 

 

“You got me there, I do love a pretty gay hole.” She smirked and got up to go to the kitchen. “Do you want anything to drink?”

 

Olivia once again keyboard smashing in an IRL setting, “Gh..bft..no...um, coffee?”

 

“I think the last thing you need is more caffeine right now, or else your heart might explode, and I am not hiding another body this week.”

 

“Wait...another?” Olivia managed to form words again.

 

Madison walked away giggling.

 

Olivia reached in her pocket and checked her phone which had been buzzing non stop for the past five minutes.

 

Message to - Ash

A: Yo, are you ok? 

O: I’m fine, I’ve been hanging out with Madison.

A: STILL?! Holy shit how long has this date been going on?

O: It’s not a date, we’ve just been hanging out and she’s really sweet and understands what I’m going through.

A: What all did you do today?

O: We went to a park and walked around, then to an old book store, got pizza and now we are at her place watching cartoons.

A: That is literally the gayest date you could go on! It’s page one of the lesbian handbook. The only thing to make this date gayer would’ve been if you went to an antique mall or met her ex who she's still friends with.

O: Well, she used to date her roommate…But that doesn't mean anything. 

A: You useless fucking lesbian

 

Madison entered the room and Olivia quickly put her phone away and got up to start cleaning the mess from dinner. 

 

“Don't worry about that.” Madison smiled and stepped closer to Olivia, staring deep into her eyes. “It’s getting late, and I was thinking. If you want, you could stay here tonight.”

 

Olivia’s soul escaped from its shell, she had finally shed her physical form and was now on her way to the realm of hades to have brunch with the ruler of the underworld. But Madison’s soft voice snapped her back into the moment which she could no longer deny was reality. 

 

“And maybe, if you’d like, if not that’s ok too no pressure. You could sleep in my room.” Madison bit her lip, the way only a pretty girl could when she wanted you to say yes, and held out her hand.

 

The lightbulb in Olivia’s brain finally clicked, the hamster was back on the wheel, her mind had finally processed what was happening after turning itself off and back on again. 

 

There she was, standing at the precipice of glory and gay. Staring at the masterpiece before her, she knew this was her moment, her time to take control of her own destiny. 

 

She grabbed Madison's hand and followed her into the bedroom.