Lunch was… salty, that’s as much as I can say about it. As much as I love jerky, I can say that I’m pretty sure I like jerky from home stuffed with sugar and artificial flavoring; this stuff just seems to be a slab of meat cut with the grain and packed in salt until a microbe wouldn’t look at it sideways.
I allowed myself a swig of water to cleanse the briny taste of dried meat and then after some deliberation a handful of dried fruit to clear the leathery taste of the water.
“This sucks.”
There wasn’t much else to say, the high of accomplishment from organizing my menu and ‘cleaning’ the first floor of the church dwindled along with my resources. Sure, I’d picked the weeds growing through the floor, cleared the broken pews into a corner and refitted loose tiles to keep this place from being a hazard to walk through but...
“I’m still in a ghost town on an island with maybe three to five days worth of food and a limited source of confirmed clean water.”
“So, what do I need… I have shelter; I need water and food are next… hopefully clothes somewhere in there.”
“I hope this place is shelter enough, the doors seem sturdy. I don’t get how everything can still be in such good condition… I guess they build churches out of sturdy stuff here.”
After stating the obvious, I decided a plan was necessary. I don’t know if complaining is a Skill, but goddamn if it is, I’ll get it soon.
“Yeah, lets go for water. I am not going to die of dysentery or dehydration in a fantasy world, that’s just not acceptable.”
“Right, lets start with those Class Pack things.”
I moved over to one of the recessed sections along the length of the chapel and brushed off the table present there. I’m still not clear on how the wood survived this long.
The ‘class packs’ looked like parchment bundles tied with butcher’s twine, I pulled the guerilla fighter pack out of my bag and set it on the table before carefully tugging at the string.
The knot untied itself and the paper flew open, unfolding to a size larger than it’s bundled shape and weight seemed to imply. Golden particles of light scattered out of it and drifted like fireflies for a moment before growing too bright to look at, suddenly they all collapsed into vague shapes on the table that refined into solid objects.
Laid out on the parchment in perfect, almost fastidious order was the pack’s contents.
“Oh shit… alright, that’s cool.”
After I got over the light show, I took inventory, to list it out we had:
-
- Another suit of leather armor, this one dyed black and looked a bit thinner… but probably easier to move in than what I was wearing right now.
- A dagger, glinting and sharp set next to a sheath in matching black, one edge was serrated.
- A lidded wooden box, when opened it seemed to be filled with small compartments of different colored pastes, like a makeup kit in greens, browns, and blacks; I think it might be camo paints.
- A fucking crossbow.
- A quiver of bolts for aforementioned crossbow, pretty nice quality, leather banded in either copper or bronze.
- Ten black pellets about the size of a chocolate bonbon but decidedly unappetizing in smell.
- A satin bag with a polished piece of steely metal inside polished to a mirror finish, probably for use with the camo paint.
- Three postage stamp sized purple gems with some kind of carving on them, I can’t identify what type which is unusual, I used to be in a rock and mineral club.
- Another suit of leather armor, this one dyed black and looked a bit thinner… but probably easier to move in than what I was wearing right now.
“Wait, I used to be an rock and mineral club? Questions for later, add it to the list.”
The flash of memory caught me off guard and I wondered why I hadn't got some sort of geology skill for a second before I returned my mind to the matter at hand
The most important inclusion in the mix was a set of clothes, a dark green tunic, brown linen trousers, and a bra, an honest to god bra!
“Universal admin dudes, I take back every bad thing I’ve said about you and your incompetent organization!”
My examination of my new acquisitions was cut short by a long awaited chance to change into something other that chafing leather sweat collector.
Much to my chagrin, everything seemed to be at a medieval technology level as far as I can guess; nothing in the way of underwear aside from the bra which was a leather number that laced up in the front.
Not exactly victoria’s secret, but it seems serviceable enough. I slipped on the new armor which fit more snugly and felt less like I had chunks of rawhide strapped to my body. The leather had a snug but modest fit, no boob windows or Brazilian cut like on the cover of Conan novels thankfully;the leather felt like it was better quality too the stuff was supple and a hell of a lot easier to move in.
I may say slipped on, but it’s dawning on me just how time consuming it is to put on or take off armor, more straps and buckles involved than bdsm play.
Pretty much everything seemed self explanatory, the armor was definitely more my style than the last set. I felt like an idiot trying to figure out the pellets before I remembered the inventory menu, smoke bombs apparently.
The really interesting things were the gems, the menu said the following when I picked one up
|
Action Confirmation Request Are you sure you would like to use [Knowledge Crystal] containing Skill [Camouflage]? Yes | ►No |
Yeah, the other two were abilities, ‘rapid engagement’ and ‘disengage’. I’m going to have to try out all of these abilities eventually… but I love opening loot, so lets finish the rest of this first; besides I remember the splitting headache I got the last time I leveled up and I bet using these things won’t feel nice either.
One at a time I stowed the rest of my equipment into the bag, but left the old leather armor underneath the table and made sure to stow that massive sheet of wrapping paper; maybe I can do something with it later.
The Combat Alchemist pack gave the same light show as the last one and left the table loaded stuff that seemed fit for a mad scientist’s lab.
A felt lined wooden case sat open, full of rows of empty glass vials all set with matching corks. Next to it was a similar case filled with what I can only describe as pieces of laboratory equipment and glassware; I was never much for chemistry but I watched a few youtube videos and I recognized erlenmeyer flasks, graduated cylinders, and various other paraphernalia.
Folded neatly beneath those cases was a leather sling, the cup of it sized perfectly to match the vials in the first.
Next to that were some more clothes, or more accurately medieval laboratory gear; goggles with sort of twisty knobs for adjusting a set of lenses with different tints, a leather smock, thick sturdy looking work gloves, a side satchel, and something that looked like a plague doctor’s mask.
The rest of the table was taken up by a third case containing a veritable smorgasbord of little glass bottles about the size of spice jars, each unlabeled but filled with powders and fluids of varied color and viscosity.
“Christ, am I starting a meth lab in a church? What is this, Florida?”
I laughed at my own joke before taking a look at the gems that came with this pack: ‘alchemical analysis’, ‘herbalism’, and ‘refine’; Three skills I expect might help an alchemist quite a bit.
When I’d put everything I was already straining the weight limit of my bag, but thankfully an answer came when I went to stow the satchel.
|
Safety Warning! Are you sure you would like to place a [Magic Satchel] into a [Magic Bag]? Yes | ►No (Recommended) |
Reportedly, it was another magic bag and thanks to a safety function that I’m extremely grateful for, I didn’t cause a schism in local spacetime.
I went through a similar song and dance for the last class pack, and let me tell you the contents were a doozie.
A crossed set of bandoliers with slots set to hold potion vials, another magic satchel, a 25 foot long reel of fuse, 5lbs of something the menu describes as ‘blast putty’(which I’m pretty sure is just magic C4), 10 grey stones described as ‘flash stones’ (I can only assume they’re magic flashbangs), five more bottles of alchemical fire and alchemical acid alongside a similar looking set filled with glowing blue fluid called ‘alchemical frost’, and three more crystals.
This batch came with three ability crystals ‘identify structural weakness’, ‘overcharge compound’, and ‘defuse’.
“Holy shit, I’m armed like a secessionist.”
The thought of having this much explosive shit in one place made me pretty nervous, so I threw it into the magic satchel and hoped that would keep anything from going off unexpectedly.
“This bears careful consideration, but right now though I need to figure out the water situation. At least I have bottles to carry it in now...”
I left the sack of explosives in the church for the time being, but wore the dagger at my hip and crossbow and quiver on my back. Conveniently the crossbow and quiver have some kind of interlocking mechanism; It was a bitch to load before I figured out the mechanism, but I feel more comfortable having it than not and now that I’ve got it down it’s not too hard to do, 23 Might for the win.
In the end I wasn’t sure if stuff in the bag could interact, so I just carried the soiled canvas with me in bundle; carefully folded to prevent… incidents.
The way back down the path was easy enough to follow, and I made good time getting to the shore; granted I could’ve done better if I weren’t sneaking, but I still don’t know what else could be on this island.
As I passed the ruined houses, I couldn’t help but speculate about what happened here; the damage was too old for me to discern if it was intentional or just an act of nature, though it whatever it was it seems like no one has lived here for a long time if the trees growing through them are any indication.
The lake water was just as beautiful today, though I was in a better state to appreciate it now not being in mortal peril; when I finally arrived at the shore I just sat in the brush and took in the view, the stillness and clarity of the lake letting me see deeper than I’d really expected possible.
I hesitated for a moment before I finally moved forward to go about my work.
“Yeah… this water can’t be that bad, and I don’t see anything lurking… but anything good at lurking wouldn’t be seen.”
For all my paranoia, my time at the shore was rather uneventful. No unknown horrors rose from the depths to claim me and not a single arrow was sent my way; though I did have a slight mishap with a bird startling me. I spun on the spot and fired my crossbow into an evergreen tree, before nodding in satisfaction for my success in repelling the potential advances of carnivorous conifers.
With that out of the way, I gathered a few gallons of water in various oddly shaped containers and washed off my bedding on the other side of the small peninsula I washed up on.
“Hopefully that’ll be enough to prevent at least some cross contamination.”
I was just about to head back to the church when I remembered to gather up a good heap of sand in what looked to be an evaporation dish and after some looking a few handfuls of gravel… I’ll need it If I’m going to make one of those filters.
When I was satisfied with my harvest, I turned back and delicately retrieved my crossbow bolt from the tree; it took some elbow grease to do but I'm not going to waste a perfectly good bolt.
Within two hours I was back at the church staring at an odd and somewhat amalgamation of glassware filled with various kinds of earth and stone at varying degrees of fineness, a faint repetitive drip of water slowly filling a flask set beneath it. Behind me my Canvas was draped over one of the intact pews drip drying
“Well alright, guess who has two thumbs and a water filter.”
I paused for my nonexistent audience to get the joke before preparing to deliver the punchline with an invigorated double thumbs up that made me bump the table and nearly destroy an hour’s worth of work.
After frantically catching the wobbling stack of glassware, I calmed down and finally finished the line
“That’s right, this bitch!”
The afternoon passed pretty quickly. Rather than sit and watch water drip, I opted to check out the rest of the church and do some cleaning where I could; not much considering my lack of a broom.
As it turns out there was a proper set of quarters up some stairs on the south side of the building that probably belonged to the priest or priestess when they lived here. The frame of the bed was intact but not much else was. The smell of damp and rot filled the air and a shelf was full of crumbling worm eaten stacks of paper that probably used to be books.
The rest of the place wasn’t much to write home about; another set of stairs lead up to a bell tower, sans bell, and a small storage room on the ground floor filled with little more than the remnants of smashed barrels and some caved in casks.
Last but not least, there was a big dusty hearth set in against the south wall that seemed designed to heat the ground floor and quarters above, an iron bar ran over it sturdily set into the masonry on either side.
“Oh damn, how did I miss this?”
By the time I’d finished my scan of the place, my canvas had dried and my water was done filtering. With the sun waning, the hearth seemed pretty inviting so I went ahead and lit a fire with some of the wood from the broken pews… or tried at least.
“Fucking goddamn cheap ass medieval zippo!”
I won’t lie, it took a while.
Don’t look at me like that, it’s not often you’re called on to light a fire with flint and steel in everyday modern life, and besides it caught eventually.
Using the power of my frustration and mustering all 23 points of Might I had, I pulled a pew over next to the hearth to rest on. It wasn’t a pretty moment, and it felt awkward having the screech of wooden furniture over stone echo throughout the empty chapel.
“Goddess, wherever you are; if you’re watching, I am so sorry.”
By the end of that ordeal, I was ready for a drink of fresh non-leather-flavored water, so I went ahead and sat down on my makeshift bed and pulled my canvas up. With my erlenmeyer flask full of filtered water, I drank deep and free before setting it down feeling satisfied with a day well spent.
Getting the armor off continues to be a hassle, but that stuff isn't remotely comfortable enough to relax in.
“Seeing as how I’m effectively done with the day, now would probably be the best time to use those crystal things… here's hoping it goes better this time.”
"Nah... this is gonna hurt like hell"
I held all nine in my hands and focused on them until the menu prompt came up.
|
Action Confirmation Request Are you sure you would like to use [Knowledge Crystal] x 9? ►Yes | No |
The moment I confirmed my choice, I knew I was right in my estimation; there was blinding pain, like a white hot poker was pressed into the crown of my head and wiggling around behind my eyes.
I’ve had migraines before, but this was something new and unique, even when compared to last night.
I screamed.
A lot.
“AAAAAAGGGH!!! BAD IDEA! BAD IDEA!!! GODDAMN IT!!! MOTHERFUCKER!!!”
I gripped my head and tumbled off the pew as my vision flickered, thankfully missing the blazing hearth and... unfortunately resulting a sudden and intimate connection between my already agony wracked skull and the granite floor.
I saw another prompt before I fell unconscious.
|
When you 'have a meeting of the minds', the other participants come away with bruises! Effect on Equip: Despite the common advice often given, you win at headbutts. Damage dealt with head increased by 25%, Damage received by head reduced by 25%, resistance to [Cranial Trauma] status effect, +5 Mt Def. Title automatically equipped Got achievement [Thirst for Knowledge] for the incredibly inadvisable act of using more than five [Knowledge Crystals] in quick succession. Skill Up [Mental Resilience] Lvl 5 |
And I can’t remember anything else until morning other than three oddly calm thoughts like rocks firm in the storm of pain. They were:
“This is going to be a repeating pattern, isn’t it?”
“At least I didn’t lose bowel control this time…”
and finally
"Will I ever learn?"
This is hilarious. Also, the Goblin Puppetmaster will have only one, very final, meeting with her, isn't he?
---
I used to be an rock and mineral club - "in a"?
left the table loaded stuff - "loaded with"?
though it whatever it was - "though whatever it was"
an odd and somewhat ? amalgamation of glassware
resulting a sudden - "in a"
I can't wait for the next chapter. I hope it comes out soon. And another fine chapter, sir.
I don't quite have a set schedule, but I'm on a roll so it should be soon for that new chapter. Once again, I'm just as eager to see what happens as you are!
Ps. It's ma'am, but I don't sweat the small stuff
@Roxyreads Oh, well, now I feel stupid. Curse you Alfred Pennyswooorth!!!