Next morning I woke up earlier than usual. I had an important shoot today. It was scheduled at 11 a.m. but I needed to be at the spot at least one hour before the scheduled time. The motorbike I would be using for the shoot was a new one and I needed to get myself accustomed to it first. I had to survey the spot, too.

An off road stunt could be fatal at any moment, if not done with meticulous preparation and caution.

As usual, Bill had risen earlier and left long before I was even out of my bed. Alone, I ate my breakfast and got ready to go out.

It was around 10 a.m. when I arrived at the spot. It was going to be an outdoor shoot at a fallow land. The ground was ploughed and harrowed long ago and the soil had become quite hard.

I made a quick survey. The stunt was not a very innovative one. It was a simple hero-chasing-villain scene where I was doing the stunt as the villain's body double. The twist lay in the background and the finale. Instead of being set against the backdrop of a city, it was set off road. It involved a risky jump and ended in a skid.

The skid was the most dangerous part of the whole stunt. Off road jump was nothing new to me. I had already performed quite a few risky jumps as part of my stunt shows.

Yet, none of them involved a planned accident. It was extremely difficult to lose control intentionally and also in a way that involved least damage. It would take a very careful calculation and a lot of luck to pull it off successfully. But then, I had always loved to test my limits and set new ones for myself.

I set to test ride the motorbike which had been hired for the stunt. It was a Triumph Tiger 800, an extremely good off roader motorbike. I was already familiar with its features and I approved it for the present stunt.

It was a chasing sequence and involved body doubles for both the hero and the villain. My friend Jay was the body double for the hero. It was he who had recommended me for the more tricky stunt as the villain's body double.

The camera had already started rolling before I could do a reki of the place where I was going to jump and then skid with my bike. They filmed Jay's part first while I checked the bike and waited for my turn.

"Cut!"

The director shouted in a hoarse voice. It took ten shots to complete Jay's part. Now it was my turn at last.

I had put on my riding gears already. The riding suit this time was a bit flashy, but there was no compromising in regard to safety measures.

We started with shooting my part of the chasing sequence. It didn't take long to finish it.

The jump, too, went as planned. It was centred around a not-so-high mound of earth at one side of the field. I changed the gears quickly and stood up on the pegs. The Tiger 800 accelerated smoothly and boosted my self confidence. I had planned to land on my front wheel so that the 'accident' which was going to be shot later, would look natural.

Landing on the front wheel was the most dangerous kind of landing in a jump. It could almost inevitably end in sending the bike in an 'endo', a stunt in which the rear of the bike went up and the rider could be sent flying over the handle bar. This could be the worst kind of crash in a jump.

I managed to land on the front wheel and then immediately brought the rear wheel down. It was an extremely difficult feat, but it went as planned.

"Cut!" The director croaked and the crew around us clapped in applause.

I saw Jay clapping, too. As I got down from the motorbike he came forward and slapped my shoulder.

"A despo as always!" He smiled. "Man, why do I always have to watch you with my heart in my mouth?"

I patted his back.

"Don't watch me then!"

We both laughed hard.

"I need to go. See you around!" Jay said.

"See you!"

I had to finish shooting the accident part. The camera rolled and I prepared to give the shot.

That was where it went a bit wrong.

The bike tilted on its left more than I had originally planned. It crashed in an awkward angle and the handle hit me hard on the left side of my chest. Even though my dirt bike chest guard minimized the impact, the wave of  pain jolted through my body and made me gasp for air.

"Cut!"

At least the shot was okay. The crew helped me to stand up.

"Are you hurt?" One of them asked.

"Not much," I smiled.

When I returned home it was dark outside. I took off my shirt and stood before the mirror in the bathroom. I saw a patch of red on my skin at the left side of my chest where I was hit by the handle.

I didn't pay attention to it. A little bit of injury now and then was quite common in my job and they generally healed on their own.

This time the injury was more severe than what I thought it to be.

I had a delayed lunch today. As a result, I didn't feel hungry and went to bed early without eating dinner.

I woke up with a severe pain in my chest.

I tried to sit up, but the pain was so severe that I couldn't even move my body. What was it? Why did it feel like there was a heavy stone on my chest grinding my ribs?

I could hear Bill moving about the hall. It shouldn't be more than 11 p.m. then. I tried to call him, but only a choking sound came out of my mouth. Then I tried to sit up, but I couldn't even raise my back.

My throat burned. I needed to drink some water. There had to be a water bottle on the bedside table at my right. I groped for it and the steel bottle fell on the ground with a clank.

Within the closed room, the sound was deafening. I heard hurried footsteps outside the door.

"Nell? What happened?"

It was Bill. But I couldn't reply to him. He waited for a second, then pushed the door open. The light from the hall showed on my face.

There must have been something in my look which made Bill react fast. In an instant, he was by my side, leaning and putting his hand on my forehead.

"What happened, Nell?" He repeated.

"My...chest…..hurts!"

Bill switched the lights on and put a few cushions under my shoulder. Then he opened my shirt carefully and stared at the bruise mark on my chest. By now, the black and blue stain had spread further on my skin.

I saw Bill's forehead furrowing heavily.

"How did this happen? Why didn't you tell me about it, you fool?"

Of course, he didn't wait for my answer. He went out and came back within a minute.

"Try to lie still."

He went on wrapping ice cubes in a piece of cloth and rubbing them gently on the bruised skin. The cold touch smothered the pain a bit.

Then Bill applied an anti bruise gel on it  and massaged it gently into my skin. His long and elegant figures glided like feathers, easing out the pain. The anti inflammatory ointment was absorbed in the bruised skin quickly and the pain dulled a bit.

Next came a painkiller.

"Swallow it." Bill said, as he put his hand behind my neck and head to support me. I took the pill from him and swallowed it with the water which he had poured in a glass.

By now, the pain had alleviated to a great extent.

Bill was massaging an anti inflammatory and sleep inducing gel on my forehead as well. The combined influence of the cool substance and Bill's magic fingers made me feel relaxed.

"Thank you, Bill!" I said sleepily.

I could feel Bill's fingers stopping in their movements. Then he pulled his hand away.

"You don't need to thank me. Just try to sleep now."

He paused, then added, "If the bruises don't fade by tomorrow, we'll have to consult a doctor. Now, sleep."

He switched the lights off and left the room. Then the lights in the hall went off, too. Only the dim night lamp glowed in the hallway. The throbbing pain in my chest alleviated slowly and I fell asleep.

Later at night I woke up once again. Outside my window the darkness of night had mellowed down and a cool breeze had started to blow. The dawn was not far away. The door of my room was left open. Through the open door I could see the large sofa in the drawing area.

Someone sat there on the sofa. His head lay on the cushioned backrest. At first, it looked as if he was sleeping, but then, his hands moved and I saw light flickering from the screen of a phone in his lap. He was awake.

Who could it be, but Bill? He was probably listening to music. But why was he sitting there at such an unearthly hour?

Could it be that he had been sitting there all night?

Somehow, it felt oddly familiar. I groped inside my  half-awakened brain, but couldn't remember anything relating to Bill. Once again, sleep took over me.

*************************************

Next time I woke up, it was already 9 in the morning. My usual wake up time.

The pain was almost gone. I got out of the bed and went to the bathroom to look into the mirror. The bruise had spread over a wide area on the left side of my chest. But the intimidating blue black colour was gone. Mostly, it wore a faded green hue.

I felt relieved. At least, there was no serious internal injury. I put on a tee shirt and came out of the room.

I was surprised to find Bill in the kitchen, making breakfast. I had never seen him staying back at home after 9 in a weekday!

What happened to him today?

"Bill? You have a holiday today?"

I might have sounded rather curious, but Bill didn't seem to be offended.

"Tell me first, how you feel now. Is the pain gone?"

"Yes, it's mostly gone and the bruise mark has faded a lot, thanks to you!"

Bill gave me a keen look, but didn't say anything.

"I stayed back to check on you," he said after some time. "I've made your breakfast and I'll be going out now."

Clear chicken soup, toast, fruit salad.

I looked at them and felt embarrassed. It had been a long time since someone looked after me in such a way.

"Thank you, Bill! But you really didn't need to do this."

Bill looked straight in my eyes.

"If I'm ever down you'll do the same thing for me, isn't it?"

I could only nod in reply. I was not sure if I could ever manage to care about someone so sincerely. I had already failed miserably. I couldn't take care of my mother properly. I couldn't be there for Inna when she wanted to talk to me for the last time. I was just too selfish, shut inside my cocoon of grief and conflict.

Would I ever be at peace with myself?