Chapter Forty-three : A thin string of denial
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"Well, My congratulations," Rokah said as he walked toward the window and lifted its curtains a bit, so he could peep through them," It is your winning. But first tell me What do you want from me, in exchange." 

He heard Mr. Hendrickson from behind still half prone on the bed demanding: "Don't open it, at the moment, I am very sensitive to the sunlight." 

Rokah was still peeping, and when he felt it was safe, he retreated, taking a glance at the exhausted man on the bed before he responded : "Light sensitivity..." He paused for a moment then he elaborated: "When we first met, I thought that you suffer from myopia. But I was wrong, your condition is way  more complicated than a simple myopia." 

Nicolai switched to the sitting position, his eyes were close and the stigma of bleeding made a dim red trail on his cheeks. His query about the source that informed the Crocotta fierce lady about his supposed to be his secret condition was answered. He also confirmed that when this person presented himself as a doctor,  it wasn't just for disguise, he was a real doctor.  

Nicolai exalted, calming himself before he asked: "Is it incurable?" 

"Depends on the underlying reason." 

A moment of silence passed before anyone said a thing, Rokah used the desk to support his weight, then said after the gaudy silence: "I don't believe that you lured me here for a medical examination?" 

Mr. Hendrickson opened his eyes, but refined to look directly at his guest. His vision was blurred with a touch of redness… "Yes, actually..." his lips curve slightly, "I want you to kill someone." 

Rokah didn't respond. 

" As I have promised you before, I will tell you the reason behind the encouragement of inbreeding in this village, and it is up to you if you will accept my request." 

Rokah didn't say anything again. 

"This village isn't actually a simple village…. "

" I figured this up." Rokah finally said.

" I guess so..." and Nicolai, finally, moved his eyes to look at him. But he couldn't see more than the silhouette. 

" Before we start talking, give me a reason why I should believe in what you are going to tell me…" 

 For Nicolai, these words that demanded assurance and this tone of voice that gave off the guise of  fake confidence, it revealed the internal turmoil this person is facing at this moment. 

Compared to their previous meeting and the talk that they have before, the doctor is now lost, adrift, filled with uncertainty and rage. Nicolai didn’t know if he felt pity for him or it was only simple curiosity. But this is another situation that confirmed to Nicolai again, his point of view about the truth, Sometimes ignorance is bliss. 

" Why did you come?" 

Rokah didn't answer, his eyes moved away, afraid to face the nearly blind man in front of him… 

" I will tell you why…"

Nicolai closed one of his eyes and made an expression of pain, his head still feels like a watery sponge. Yet he forced himself and continued : "Because you don't believe in what the Crocotta's had and have told you... Anymore… right… ?"

"Because what they have told you and what you have seen and experienced was a blend of contradiction. "

As Nicolai was speaking, deep down, he  was making assumptions because a person engraved beliefs won't simply change in this speed. There must be something that the doctor had witnessed and made the glass of uncertainty in his heart broke. 

"I see, this is your plan… ..." 

Finally, Rokah said. And Nicolai hushed in interest, he was unsure about what the doctor is going to say, but at the same time very excited to know. 

"This is your plan from the start, I was wondering why you offered to answer one of my questions without a payment. I Finally, understand why?" Rokah paused to deduce Mr. Hendrickson reaction and when he read the interest in his face he kept going.

"At First, I thought this was a bait to lure me back here again, how short-sighted I was...  Your true objective was to test my beliefs." 

Nicolai couldn't hold himself, but to smile. Intelligence and finding the truth are two inseparable things. He responded, but this time his voice held a tone of cheerfulness:

" You can't blame me in this, weren't you, doing the same thing? Testing my values by purposely letting that maid, half unconscious, so she will witness our meeting..."

Nicolai paused, he wanted to examine to the great detail the look on Rokah face, unfortunately his eyes were more trying to picture a clear image. Thus, He struggled to stand and approached him. And when they were standing face to face with each other. Nicolai resumed as he stared at Rokah's face. 

"All this suffering I am enduring, all this infelicity I am dwelling in is all because of you. "

Rokah seemed that he still yet to connect the dots, hence Nicolai accelerate the process by declaring : "You wanted to know if I was going to kill her afterward or not?... Right...?" 

Finally, Rokah averted his eyes, and attempted to escape the pressure by looking away to the door, to the walls… Everywhere but to Mr. Hendrickson eyes. 

And the silence returned.

… 

"She is dead."  Rokah waited until Mr. Hendrickson's has returned to sit on the bed before he declared. 

This time, Rokah looked directly into his tired eyes. He watched him put his hand above his forehead, then slide it to cover his eyes as if he was in great pain.

 It took Nicolai a few moments before he said: "Well, It wasn't me, and you know that. If you haven't, I would be already dead."

Rokah moved to see through the curtains for the second time, and asked while looking outside: "Then what is the reason behind the encouragement inbreeding?" 

Everything depends on this answer… 

That was Rokah resolve  and that was why he came here. 

He was fed up with this game of falsehood and lies, thus he decided that Mr. Hendrickson life or death depends on this answer. 

If it doesn't persuade him… 

If it doesn't satisfy him… 

He will help Mr. Hendrickson, the black ghost, to finish off what he couldn't succeed to finish off in that stormy night.

Rokah will help him ends all his physical and emotional suffering.... Forever…  

Isn’t this the noblest goal a doctor strove to accomplish.

"What do you think about the consequences of inbreeding?"  Nicolai said, barely he could speak in intelligible voice, his eyes were hidden behind his palm. In an attempt to conceal his pain. 

Nevertheless, Rokah responded ignoring this fact. 

"Physical deformities, Incurable illness, fragility, short life span…" 

"And…" 

"…. "

"Mental disorders…" Nicolai forwarded after a second. 

"Like stupidity, slow learning, low level of intelligence. Also, didn’t you notice the lack of ambitions." 

Rokah suddenly appeared in his mind the image of Chewa, her ambition to leave this village. It was his trigger to the illumination, another important part of this complex puzzle. 

"It is easier to control a society of dumb sheep, without ambitions, and they don't ask questions. Only wished to eat, sleep and work." Nicolai explained. 

"The barrier, why  there is this barrier, isn't because they are trapped here." 

"This barrier is not to trap them inside, the barrier was designed to keep out other creatures outside. And if someone of those creatures could trace past it, he will get trapped inside. For the sole purpose to protect this village from other competitors." 

"I still don't understand what you are hinting at." 

"It is not like you don't understand what I mean you are refusing to admit what you have already suspected. This not a village, ...  This is a farm." 

" A farm... Like in what ... A farm ..."

" A livestock." Nicolai interrupted,  because for  him, Rokah was unable to pronounce the right word. 

" A livestock?, Why? There is a plenty of livestock in the village and in the mountains..."

Rokah words were a failed attempt of denial to himself and Nicolai was observing in joy, as if he just ingested the pill that will relieve his pain. But that wasn't enough, so he explained: "For a Polymorph, a  Chimera flesh  can accelerate the regeneration ability dramatically, Also some of their internal organs have a few medical uses that you should be familiar with."

Rokah refused to look at Mr. Hendrickson, He bit the back of his bandaged hand. In vain efforts to pacify his rampant rage. He walked to the door, then returned to the desk. He wanted to destroy something so some of this anger would get out. Yet sadly he was entitled to not expose himself. He must endure this destroying force in silence. 

Lady Savannah was lying, from the start. 

All that talk about freedom and redemption was lies. 

Rokah wondered as he stood in the middle of the room about Lady Savannah future plan with him... 

He was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, his senses were collapsing and losing the connection with reality. He didn’t feel his body anymore and his limbs failed him. It was a lie… everything was a lie. He knows from the start that his life or death is meaningless in this savage world, yet he chose to live on… however now… right now… everything is worthless. 

Nicolai struggled to stand again, he approached Rokah placing his hand on the doctor's shoulder. 

" You shouldn't be oppressed or discouraged, this is how the world works. The way life is set in motion. This is the truth, our reality. Since the beginning of time, The strong always prey on the weak."

yay, a new chapter for the new year...

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