Chapter 35: Lonely
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The men stayed in the library for quite a while. At some point Toshan disappeared and when he next showed his face it was to announce a midday meal. Re agreed that he was hungry and took Ka to the kitchens for a fairly modest meal. Then the redhead stood and immediately brought Ka back to his chambers. The prince was once more leading Ka by the wrist and he took him straight to the bed. Ka groaned loudly as the redhead lifted the heavier chain to his collar. “If you still hate it, figure out the lock,” Re said again, just as dismissively as he had before.

Ka only sighed again. “I have now,” he griped. That wasn't the problem he had.

Prince Re paused a moment before finishing the puzzle and stepping back. Ka's eyes were lowered and the prince lifted his chin until their gazes met. “Then tell me why you are upset.”

Ka hesitated for a long moment before he swallowed, surprisingly nervous. “I would prefer not to stay here alone.”

Slowly a smile spread across the redhead's face. “You would prefer to stay with me?”

Ka hesitated another heartbeat before admitting, “Yes.”

Re's smile only grew more until a look of triumph settled on his features. Ka regretted his admission and pursed his lips in annoyance, but he held his tongue. Sadly it didn't help him to get what he wanted and Re stepped away from the scribe. “You will stay here again today,” he stated firmly. “I will be sure to bring you along tomorrow.”

Ka let out another sigh, but he nodded. “Very well,” he said quietly and settled into one of the chairs.

Re was still smiling and he stepped close. The tomes from the library rested on the table and Re placed his hand on top of the little stack. “Learn some stories to tell me. And play a game with Harim, your day will pass quickly enough.” Ka nodded again and Re's smile only grew more. “I look forward to returning to you this evening.” He lifted his hand, caressing Ka's jaw before he stepped away again and sauntered out the door, utterly thrilled that his pet was beginning to desire his company.

Ka sighed again when the door was shut. He reached up and undid the lock again, dropping the chain to the floor. It did not really make him feel any better and he sighed again. For a little while he looked through the books and scrolls he'd brought back: a small diverse collection of travel journals and old records. Ka did not begin reading any of them, he simply had no interest for his usually favored pastime. Instead he got up and went to the small stack of games. He pulled one of these out and lay the board on the table before looking around to find where Toshan had gone.

The servant was straightening the prince's jewels, but he noticed Ka's attention and turned his attention there. “Do you need some water?” he asked and went to fill Ka's goblet before he had a chance to answer.

Ka pursed his lips, but thanked him for the drink. Then he gestured to the game, “Would you like to play with me?”

Toshan shook his head slightly, “I don't know how to play. You could teach me if you'd like.”

“Better than sitting around doing nothing,” Ka said with a small smile as he settled into one of the chairs again. Toshan sat opposite him, paying close attention. He learned quickly and the two played several rounds before the servant declared he had other tasks to attend to. Ka gave him a tight smile and let him go. The scribe gathered his books and moved over beside the book case where he made himself comfortable on the floor.

The afternoon passed slowly for Ka. He had trouble focusing on anything and spent much of his time simply sitting there, lost in reverie. He didn't really read anything and what he did read, he doubted he would be able to recall later. He stayed there against the wall until the sun began to sink low and the shadows stretched across the room. Ka only finally stood again when the door opened. The scribe's eyes widened in panic, but he calmed when it was just Harim to walk in.

The guard glanced around before smiling at him and greeting him casually. Ka returned the greeting, walking closer so he could see the other better. As he neared, Harim nodded towards the table and the game board still set on it. “You wanna play?”

“Is that why you are in here,” Ka said with a little annoyed huff. “Don't patronize me.”

Harim blinked at him before frowning slightly. “I don't know what that means.”

Ka hesitated and his annoyance faded. “Um, it means I do not need the prince to set up some play date for me as if I were a child.”

Harim nodded slowly, but then just went to sit at the table. “Sure.”

Ka was feeling much less confident and he followed to the table, standing beside the furniture. “Is that not why you offered to play?”

“What offer?” Harim demanded. “I'm not offering, I'm asking if you want to join me.”

He was setting up the board so that he could play on his own and Ka suddenly felt badly. He sat in the chair as he recalled that Harim had been the one to choose these games; he'd called them some of his favorites. “Sorry. I'll play if you'd like.” Harim nodded and changed how he set it up so they could play a usual game. As they began, Ka asked curiously, “Why are you in here if the prince did not order it?”

“That's not what I said,” Harim answered. “Prince Re decided to move the post in here again. He said he liked it better than having us out in the hall. I'm sure not gonna argue, it makes the job a hell of a lot easier on me.”

“It will be reassuring to me as well,” Ka told him, still feeling slightly bad for his assumptions. He was sure Re's decision had something to do with their earlier conversation, but that apparently didn't affect Harim's behavior. Who was Ka to turn away such an act of friendship when that was exactly what he desired? This would be a good thing. He pushed his lips up in a smile and decided he would do his best to enjoy this change in his recently monotonous days.

-o-o-o-o-o-

Re returned to his chambers drunk again, though not so obviously as the previous nights. He walked fairly steadily, but he smelled of wine. And much to Ka's regret, he caught the scribe's chin and forced a kiss onto him before settling for dinner. He did not comment when Ka took his food back over to his own bed to eat. The prince seemed too tired to care and he went to bed quickly once he had eaten.

Over the next several days, Prince Re was true to his word and Ka got a chance to see first hand what the redhead did with his time. It was not much different than what he'd seen already and that did little for his boredom. Ka's wrists were connected by chain again so that Re could easily lead him around. He sat at the prince's side in silence for the tedious sentencings and for another temple ceremony. He sat through several lessons with the general, whose classes continued to be held more frequently. When Re's attention was demanded elsewhere, Ka was once more reduced to mere decoration, silent and obedient under threat of punishments.

It was in between these formal duties that Ka was able to actually interact with the prince, but even these times were few. Re spent his moments of free time laughing with Tamul and other friends that came to visit. Ka wasn't really a part of these conversations, relegated to the background as he listened to their in jokes and gossip about castle staff. He spent this time just as quiet, just listening to others speak, or to Rina's beautiful music filling the background. He told stories when they were requested, faithfully recalling the tales without any elaboration. It seemed like too much work to put into something no one was really paying attention to anyway.

After another day spent this way, Re was saying farewell to Crae and Ghita for the night. His friends laughed merrily as they headed for the palace gates and Re drained his goblet of wine as he turned back to Ka. “I want to eat under the stars tonight,” he said and began to lead the scribe along again.

“From the stores?” Tamul asked and when Re confirmed it, he nodded. “I will bring more drink and meet you at the wells,” the captain said and bowed to them before he hurried off.

Rina was still with them, letting her sweet music fill the silence. It wasn't long before they reached the wells and Ka was released to sit and relax. He leaned comfortably against the stone and looked up into the night. The moon was still a large wedge in the sky, bright enough to illuminate this dark section of the palace. The area was cast in silvery light and dim shadow, quiet and still.

Prince Re was watching his pet. He quieted his flute and sent her off for the night, silently watching as Ka stared at the sky. Finally he moved closer and knelt beside Ka. “You are still upset.”

The brunet jumped slightly, startled from his thoughts as he focused on the prince. “What?” he asked before lowering his eyes with a mumbled, “Sorry.”

Re pursed his lips unhappily. He turned so that he sat beside Ka and reordered thoughts. “Why are you apologizing?” he asked first.

Ka was quiet for a few breaths as he thought of his answer. “Because if your companions are unhappy it may make you look bad.”

“That may not be true, given some of the entertainment in this place. Besides that, there is no one here to see you,” Re pointed out. “I will not punish you for a bad mood.”

Ka frowned and let out a huff. “I am not concerned about punishment, but we have an agreement.”

Silence settled around them again as Ka stared now at the desert sand. Re was frowning as well and he asked again, “Why are you upset?”

This time the scribe didn't raise his gaze. “I don't know,” Ka muttered morosely.

Re let out a large sigh and spoke in a measured tone. “I thought you were growing accustomed to your life here, but you are unhappy again. I gave you entertainment and even company, but you are still bored. I brought you along with me, but you are still lonely.” He paused and let out another sigh. “I am not sure what else I can do.”

For a moment the two sat in silence, Re watching his pet while Ka stared at the sand. The scribe struggled to come up with an answer, finally frowning angrily. “I do not know if this is something you can fix.”

“If the only thing that will make you happy is a life that no longer exists, there is nothing anyone can do.” Re stated flatly.

Ka sighed, but the blunt truth broke through the fog that seemed to entomb his thoughts. Ka focused on the statement for a moment before he slowly turned to the prince. “I am not upset; I don't feel angry.” Ka really was growing used to this place, this depression did not make sense to him logically. Lonely though, that word had more resonance with his soul. “I do miss that life,” he told the prince. “I miss enjoying time with my friends.”

Re didn't move for a moment, staring into Ka's pale brown eyes. Then slowly, he sat back against the well and turned his gaze out towards the palace wall. “You need to bring some good beer,” he said after a while. Ka was completely confused, but understood as Tamul walked up to them. The captain knelt and filled Prince Re's goblet from a carafe he had brought. He then left the pitcher and stood again, leaving without a word. “He won't be long,” Re said and then held his cup out to Ka.

“I do not know that alcohol will do any good either,” Ka said pessimistically.

“Perhaps not, but perhaps it will,” Re argued. “I find good wine goes a long way to soothing the troubles of the world.”

This only made Ka frown more and he wiped his mouth as he remembered the prince's drunken kiss. “I think you soothe yourself too much, and far too often.” The prince was smiling faintly now and he said nothing. He waved the cup slightly and with a little sigh, Ka finally raised his hands to take it. The scent of alcohol was strong enough to make him hesitate once more before taking a gulp. Ka cringed as he swallowed, then coughed slightly as he struggled to keep his composure.

Re chuckled regardless, taking the cup back for a long drink of his own. “You were not a heavy drinker, I take it.”

Ka shook his head slightly. “Not of anything that strong. It is good though, behind the fermentation.” He turned away and climbed to his feet long enough to get a long drink of well water. Standing, he noticed when Tamul returned with another carafe and as the captain joined them, Ka settled down again beside Prince Re.

“Join us,” Re said and urged Tamul to sit.

He shook his head though and argued, “I'm on duty, my prince.”

“On duty for me,” Re said firmly. “I insist.”

Tamul still hesitated and after a moment he agreed. “Let me get us food from the stores. We can relax for the evening.”

The man disappeared only a few moments this time and returned with dry rations and fruit. “We should make this a habit,” Re said as his captain sat and took off his helmet to get comfortable. Tamul agreed and lifted the carafe of beer, pouring glasses for himself and Ka. Then Re turned his gaze to the brunet once more. “A relaxing meal away from prying eyes and nosy servants. What do you think?”

“Do you actually want my opinion?” Ka asked and waited for the prince to nod. “I think that is what you do every night.” He smiled slightly and took a drink of the milder alcohol. “However it is definitely nice to eat in the fresh air instead of inside of stone walls.”

Re chuckled slightly and nodded. “And our guard can join us. Perhaps I'll have Rina stay next time, just to enjoy her company as well.”

“If you do that, she might consider it a courtship move,” Tamul said, laughing.

“Oh be quiet,” Re admonished him in good humor, the two old friends instantly starting their usual rapport. “I must find someone else for her to fawn over if she continues this way.”

“She likes you, there is nothing wrong with that.” Tamul gave the prince's shoulder a playful shove, smiling wide.

Re chuckled, but paused and deliberately turned his focus on Ka. The scribe blinked and swallowed as his mouth went dry under the sudden attention. Then he licked his lips and said, “She's very pretty.”

Re's smile grew and he replied directly to the scribe. “She is, and her music is lovely, but she does not hold any interest for me beyond that.”

“Tamul is right though,” Ka said, “she clearly likes you. She would do anything you asked.”

Re shook his head and finally looked away, back to his meal. “I do not want blind obedience. It means much more to me that she wants to be of use – and she is.”

“Fantastic use,” Tamul cut in. “I can't believe how quickly she is learning and she is becoming a wonderful look out.”

“It has been nice to get into a routine again,” Ka said in agreement. “I've been lying about too much, I am in danger of becoming truly lazy.”

“You enjoy the training?” Re asked, sounding excited to confirm it.

His smile grew wider when Ka nodded. “Yes, it's been nice, really.”

“Physical activity makes you feel good,” Tamul said wisely before adding with a chuckle, “As does beer.” And he took another long drink from his cup before topping it off again.

Re paused again and caught Ka's gaze. “Does it?” he asked quietly. “Do you feel any better?”

Ka lowered his eyes to stare at his goblet of beer. He knew alcohol wasn't the answer to this, but at least in the moment he was feeling better. “Maybe,” he answered and took another drink.

“Then this will certainly be made a habit,” Re said. He reached out and took Ka's wrist, swiftly undoing one cuff and then the other. He simply set them aside and returned to his food and his own drink. Ka smiled more himself. He took another drink and then shifted enough to lean back on his hand instead of against the stone well.

The three enjoyed the meal as friends, talking more about Rina and the other guards. At one point Tamul began to complain about other palace guards, but Re shooed him away from this, guiding the conversation some and staying on topics Ka had at least some knowledge of. That act of inclusion was not lost on Ka and he felt almost obligated to join the conversation. It was a duty he didn't mind and that he found more and more enjoyable as his drinking went on. By the time their meal was finished, all three were laughing and joking and making excited plans for the near future.

Tamul got up first, offering help to each of the others. Re kept an eye on his pet, gauging his steadiness. He didn't seem to have much trouble and Re found he was pleased the brunet had not indulged too much. The prince bent to grab the golden cuffs and held them out to Ka. The scribe sighed slightly and held his hands out, but Re shook his head. He only took one of Ka's hands, turning it over and handing him the cuffs. “Just hold onto these. And stay beside me.”

“I will,” Ka agreed quickly. The chains still bothered him, he would happily enjoy this time of freedom no matter how long or brief it was. They traveled to one of the palace gardens to continue the night. Ka had mentioned admiring the lovely and rare plants and Re was pleased he could share the space with his pet.

The prince was showing Ka around the space, walking close enough that Ka could properly admire the lush flora. “I spend a lot of time here as well,” the prince told him. “Many people do, it can be difficult to find times when it is empty.”

“Then we are especially lucky now,” Ka said. Aside from the odd servant they were alone and had been for a little bit.

Unfortunately nothing can last forever and Tamul approached the pair again. “I believe you are being searched for, my lord,” he informed the prince. The redhead growled and Tamul sighed in apology. “A servant rushed away after seeing you, I'm sure someone will come shortly.”

“I suppose this night is coming to an end then,” Re sighed and turned to Ka. “It seems a success, you are no longer upset.”

“Because I'm drunk,” Ka pointed out and then laughed.

“I am just happy that you are happy now,” the prince said. He reached out and took Ka's wrist to lead him back to his quarters.

The three had hardly entered the halls when a voice called out from behind them. “Prince Re!”

The prince's grip tightened around Ka's wrist. He froze for only a moment before swiftly turning to face the speaker. At the other end of this hall stood the king, his own captain of the guard by his side. Tamul sucked in a quick breath and bowed low, offering a reverent greeting. The prince said nothing, merely raising his chin as the older Re approached.

“I have been looking for you,” the king informed. “The family has gathered for dinner.”

“I have already eaten,” the prince said. He stepped forward to meet the king, keeping Ka behind him. The scribe was busy fixing his shackles in place, sad that his time of freedom had been very brief indeed.

The king was unmoved by his son's argument. “That is your own misfortune. Hurry up.” The ruler turned to go back the way he had come.

The prince stood still for a moment. His jaw was clenched as he struggled to think of a way out of this forced meeting. He was too aware of Ka though, knowing a miscalculation could leave the scribe completely vulnerable. The prince pursed his lips and sighed in defeat. “Very well. I'll be there-”

“Now,” the king finished harshly for him.

The king looked back to put weight behind the order. It was Prince Re to waver, turning to look back at Ka.

“I said now!” the king bellowed again.

Re turned his eyes to Tamul, but his captain shook his head. “My post is here, I cannot leave you.”

Re's jaw clenched and he nodded. “Very well,” he said again, giving the words the sound of a curse. He wrapped his hand around the chain between Ka's wrists and met the scribe's eyes. “Do not speak until we retire for the night.”

Ka bowed at once, almost effortlessly playing his part. “Of course, Master Re.”

“Good,” the prince said with just a bit of relief. Then he turned to follow the king, who turned and continued on his path without looking back.

-o-o-o-o-o-

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