It was about mid-day, the day after our ‘date’ from last night. Kat took me to go shopping with her, and at first it was a blast. Some of the stores had so many weird little knick-knacks that grabbed my attention. The fae world was filled with new and exciting objects, but was also lacking in some things I was used to from the human world.
For example, they didn’t have any phones over here or at least ones that I'm used to. They still had long-range communication, using magic of course. They had small little enchanted boxes that practically worked similar to landline phones. Just push a little magic through, and it would send out a call to another box.
Sadly, It seemed I was the only one having fun. Kat was getting more and more frustrated as the day went on. Every store we went to ended up the exact same. First, they were all nice and friendly, as they probably do to most customers. Then when they realized she was the queen’s daughter their actions suddenly took a sharp turn. They were all but praising the grounds she walked on.
She was still grumbling when I decided to speak up, hoping that a change of topic would help her mood.
“So Kat?” I asked. “Remember how you took the form of an actual cat when we first met?”
“Hmm? What about it? If it's about why I was in that form in the first place, I just find it relaxing sometimes.”
“No, I was just curious if I had something like that as well.”
“A cat form?” She asked quizzically.
“Well, I guess it would be a fox form technically,” I add.
“Yeah eventually. Might take you a few weeks before your body adapts to being able to do so.” She says, before motioning towards a cafe just down the street. “Go on in and ask for a seat for two, I got a plan to fix our problems.”
I was about to ask what problem she meant, before I saw her walking down a nearby alley then ducking out of sight at the end. I sighed and walked on towards the cafe. I figure the ‘problem’ she’s referring to is with how everyone recognizes her as royalty. Not sure how she could even fix that, maybe an illusion?
As I walked inside the cafe, I was met by a very energetic squirrel fae dressed up in a waitress uniform.
“Hi! Welcome to Mystic Misty’s Cafe, I'm Leah and I'll be your server for today.” She exclaimed. “A table just for you or are you expecting company?”
“Table for two please, they should be here shortly,” I say. She brings me over to a small table in the corner of the restaurant.
“Would you like something while you wait?” She asks.
“Well, I don’t really know...It’s my first time here, so I guess the special? If there is one at least.”
“One special! Got it!” She exclaims as she writes it down on a notepad. “I’ll bring it out right away.”
She left, just as energetic as she was when I walked in. I don’t know how anyone could be that energetic all day. I looked around the cafe now that I got the chance. It looked surprisingly just like any old cafe from the human world. It almost felt like I stumbled back into my old world, maybe they took inspiration from it?
I was keeping myself occupied watching the occasional person leaving and entering the place. Trying to keep an eye out for Kat, but I had no luck. I was just starting to wonder what was taking her so long and if she was okay, when Leah came back with what looked like a strawberry parfait.
“Here you go!” She said as she put the dessert down on the table. “If you need anything else just wave me down, I’ll let you sit and wait for your date.” She said with a smile before she turned around and started helping some of the other customers.
I was trying to pretend I didn’t hear that last part as I took a bite from the parfait. Heh, par-fait...it sounds kind of like...
I shook my head, hopefully clearing my brain from such a terrible joke.
Anyways the parfait was good, but not very helpful in distracting me from what she said. I wouldn’t mind if Kat considered this a date, but I kept my expectations low. I wouldn’t want to make her uncomfortable while I stay in the fae world after all.
I was just scanning the customers entering and leaving, before I saw someone enter that grabbed my attention. He was standing tall, wearing what looked like an expensive dress shirt. He had short black hair, topped with two triangle ears, and a black cat tail hanging from behind him. He looked around the restaurant before his blue eyes met mine. He was definitely pretty handsome...
I didn’t even realize when I started blushing, or the fact that I was holding my breath. I blamed my reactions on my new hormones as I looked away to distract myself. I tried finding something to stare at through the window as my entire self-understanding of my sexuality collapses into pieces. Guess I'm not as gay as I thought I was, maybe bi? Definitely bi.
I didn’t even realize when he sat down across from me, with a smirk on his face.
“Hey cutie, never seen you around before. What's your name?” He asked.
“E-Emma.” I stutter, why am I so nervous?. “W-what's yours?”
“Ken.” He said. “It’s nice to meet you, Emma.”
“Y-you too.”
His grin grew wider, and he looked at me with a weird look. Like he was a predator, and I the prey.
“Do you like what you see?” He asked.
“W-W-W-What? I-I-I don’t know what you're talking abo-” I tried to, very calmly, say before he started laughing. He was practically about to start rolling on the floor from how hard he was laughing. I just sat there staring, dumbfounded at the sequence of events. As he was finishing up, he wiped a tear before speaking up again.
“Em, seriously? You’d think with how often me and Ana tease you, you’d start to learn to recognize these things.”
…..
“Is that you Kat?” I sighed. Of course, this would be her plan to deal with her being recognized as royalty. And of course one of her plans involves teasing me at the same time.
“Technically, it's Ken in this form.” He says. “It's not the first time I've used the form, it's got its uses to explore the city without being noticed.”
I looked them up and down, before cautiously speaking up again. “So uh... Are you like me?” I asked, he just cocked an eyebrow and looked confused. “You know, trans? Would you rather me use he/him pronouns?”
He looked a little surprised as he answered. “No, I still prefer being Kat. About ninety percent of the time. The other ten percent I enjoy being Ken. But yeah, while I'm in this form I'd prefer he/him.”
I nodded as he glanced back at me. “That first reaction I didn’t expect though.” He said before his teasing smirk came back. “A blushing Em’s pretty cute, huh?”
“....I’ll get you back for this. My vengeance will be swift and brutal.”
“Sure, sure.” He laughed. I'm going to need to recruit a master at teasing to teach him a lesson. Ana and I will make sure he regrets it.
Thankfully the teasing stopped, for now. We actually had a good meal without anyone bothering us for once. With things being peaceful for once, we actually were able to shop and explore the town without any interruptions. Spending time with Ken was just as fun as spending time with Kat.
~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~
Somehow, a week passed with me barely noticing. Time just seemed to go by whenever I was with Kat. We were getting ready for our trip out into the woods soon. It was sometime within the next couple of days, she said. We made sure to pack enough supplies and rations to last us a week, maybe even two out there in the wilds.
Well, I WAS getting ready for the trip. Instead, I got assaulted by Ana again who wanted me dressed up for tonight. She said I had an important dinner planned with Kat and a few others. I jokingly asked if this was going to be another one of her ‘dates’ she kept planning between me and Kat. She just smiled at me, which left me with a resounding zero answers to my question.
~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~
Arriving in the dining room, I noticed I was the first to arrive. This time the table had four chairs, I sat down and waited for everyone else to show up. Ana brought me some juice again, and we had some small talk before the door opened.
The first to enter was Kat, wearing one of her fancy dresses. The next two that came in through the door made me gasp in surprise.
“Sam!? Victoria!?” I exclaim before rushing over to greet them. Sam wrapped me up in a hug before I even realized it.
“Hey Em.” She said as she embraced me. “You look a little shorter than I remember.”
“Is that all you noticed?” I asked jokingly, letting out a small giggle.
“Hmmm, maybe a tad more hair than I remember,” she said with a joking grin on her face. “In all seriousness Emma, you look amazing. I'm glad I could get to meet the real you.”
“It’s good to see you too, Sam,” I say as we both let go of the hug. It was great to see my best friend again, but something had me curious so I spoke up.
“I thought it was going to take maybe another week to get the fae portal going, what changed?”
Victoria spoke up first. “Sam here practically worked day and night to help me set it up. Wouldn’t just sit still for a moment since you left, said she just had to see you again.” Victoria let out a small chuckle as she continued. “It’s good to see you again Emma dearest.”
“It's good to see you too Victoria, I'm so happy to see you two again.”
Dinner was good, and was even better in the company of two people I practically consider family now. We talked and talked about how I’ve been since we left for the fae world. How I've been enjoying my new body, and how life in the new world is like. Eventually, we moved out into the backyard, where I normally spend my time star gazing. Sam dragged me off into a corner away from her aunt and Kat.
“So?” I asked. “What's up?”
Sam sighed. “You like Kat don’t you?”
“W-what? What gave you that idea?” I asked, trying not to meet her eyes and give away anything. She just stared at me as I stood there nervously shifting from side to side, before her glare caused me to break. “...maybe a little,” I admit.
“Yeah, it was kinda obvious.” She said as she looked over to where Kat was across the backyard. “During dinner, it was like you two were just constantly sharing glances with each other.”
She looked back over to me. “So? Why haven’t you asked her out yet?”
“I'm worried she doesn’t like me..”I sighed.
“Seriously? You really play up the stereotype huh?” She said with a sigh, “Like I said you were both sharing glances with each other, she clearly likes you too. So just go ask her ya doofus.”
“But...but…” I mumble, worried about the thousand possible ways it could go wrong.
“Look if you aren’t ready then don’t worry about it. I just want to see my best friend happy. I’m sorry for pressuring you.” She said before patting my head. “It's weird you know, seeing you with fox ears.”
“Don’t pat me like a child!” I exclaim, secretly enjoying the attention.
“Then why do you look so content?” Okay, maybe I wasn’t being as secretive as I thought.
I shook her hand off before looking at Kat. Wondering if Sam was right and that I should just go take the plunge and ask her out. Screw it, I’ll never make any progress if I continue what I've been doing. I took a big, deep breath and glanced at Sam. She seemed to notice my intent, as she just smiled and slapped me on the back.
“Good luck Em.” She said as she walked towards her Aunt.
I walked up to Kat, who was conversing with Victoria about some weird magical spell. Victoria got interrupted by Sam who dragged her off somewhere. Leaving just me and Kat alone.
“Kat, can we talk for a bit please,” I ask, already starting to feel my determination waver now that the moment is here.
“Sure Em, I wanted to talk with you anyways.” She said as she grabbed my hand and took us to a secluded spot in the garden.
I stood there, a nervous mess. My breathing felt off, and was it just me, or is the whole garden just really hot? I took a deep breath before turning to Kat and opened my mouth ready to speak.
“I love you!” came from a voice that was distinctly not mine. I was shocked when I realized it came from Kat, before I could even give my reply she continued on.
“I can’t keep it a secret anymore, ever since we met I’ve been falling more and more in love with you. I was content with just keeping it to myself, I wanted you to take in the joys of having your new body without dealing with my confession. I didn’t want to ruin your experience.” She said, with tears forming in her eyes. “But I can’t hide it anymore, Em. I love you!”
“Kat… I feel the same way.” I started, her face almost instantly glowing with pure happiness. “Since we met, I swear I felt something like a spark. I tried to ignore it for so long, worried about making things awkward between us. Worried that you wouldn’t love me due to who I used to be.”
I could feel my own tears forming in my eyes. “Kat, I love you too!”
She just smiled in that cute way that always managed to make me smile too. She embraced me as we just let out tears of relief and happiness. She looked me in the eyes before her head leaned down. I could tell what was about to happen as I moved my lips towards hers.
That’s how I shared my first but most wonderful kiss, with the most beautiful girl in my life. One that made me wish for more as our lips parted.
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww so cute
Soo cute, Trans Fox Girl, and a Gender Fluid Cat. So adorable.
The only bad thing is that there isn't another chapter online yet
Great work so far
So cuuuuuuuuute! And gay! AND CUTE!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Awww this is so cute :3 And fluffy in more ways than one
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! So cute
Sigh... the trend continues. There's a fox girl? Well then, obviously she must be straight or bi! Can't be anything else, just wouldn't be right, or something. No, no, pay no attention to the fact that she never had any indication that she might be anything but a lesbian until her body was changed to match who she really is, implying that sexuality is based entirely on biology and hormones and exclusively gay people aren't real, there's nothing wrong here!
...ignore me, I'm just annoyed by the internet as a whole right now.
For actual critique, since you already have all the confirmation you need that it is, indeed, adorable... (because it is, I definitely give you that. Kudos! Fluff is the best.)
This is going beyond fast. From meeting to suspicion of mind control to declarations of love within a week or less? They don't even know each other! They haven't even found out if they can cohabitate without wanting to kill one another yet, let alone have a lasting relationship. Would probably have been better to have them declare attraction to one another, and then built the emotional connections leading to love over the course of at least a few weeks, with plenty of intentional dates involved. Love this fast? Just feels... shallow.
Decent chapter, but the story pacing needs work.
My apologies if I've come across as a sarcastic asshole, I tried hard not to, but I'm annoyed about something else right now and feel like I might have failed.
Plus the whole "biology controls sexuality" implication is a hot button for me. At least this one seems unintentional...
First off, thank you for the genuine criticism. I actually fully agree that the story pacing needs massive work, as well as probably more than a few plot points. I also definitely didn't intend for the whole biology and hormone thing. I probably could have done a better job showing that she was bi from the start, I just thought it would be more natural if I waited till now I guess. I think what this story might need is for me to revisit it later once I've gotten more writing experience and maybe flesh it out so the pacing is better. As it stands I've only been writing as a hobby for the past four or five months so I definitely still consider myself new with all this.
@Sourie Damn, only four or five months? You're actually a fair sight better than I've seen of others who have only been writing for that length of time!
For pacing a romance, the best thing I can advise is this: people in healthy relationships disagree sometimes. They have different wants, different needs, different backgrounds... hell, fairly often they can't stand each others' hobbies! A relationship without any of those small conflicts just feels too perfect to the reader. They can end up feeling suspicious, or even have a sense of lingering dread, as they wait for that imperfection to appear. I myself have ended up thinking "yeah, one of these two is going to murder the other by the end of this story" upon seeing a too-perfect romance!
You have to use those differences, those little disagreements, those moments of getting to know one another (and possibly disliking what they learn), to properly pace a romance. They help the reader empathize with the couple (or polycule), even if the reader has never been in a relationship themselves.
Of course, while I feel this is all good advice (if a bit disjointed, perhaps), the biggest thing to remember is that proper pacing is a completely subjective thing. There is no "perfect pace" to write a story. It's a complicated subject that depends on so many different things, such as reader expectation, author's intent, form of media, rate of content release, story genre, audience demographics, and so so much more it's ridiculous. There's no one way to fix it, no one way to learn, and no single source of advice to listen to. The best things you can do to get better at this aspect of writing are to keep writing and listening to feedback (and if you find yourself with an audience that seems to enjoy literally everything you ever put out, try asking them for that detailed feedback that really helps! You might find that they have small annoyances with things you write but let slide because the rest is just so perfect for them, or suggestions to make things better, or even just ideas and theories on where you're taking the story that can spark all sorts of things in your own mind. Feedback can be one of the best parts of writing, even when it can hurt -- perhaps especially when it hurts!) and to keep reading. Read stories that are good, read stories that are bad, read good stories you hate (and then try and figure out exactly why you hate them), read bad stories that you love (and then try and figure out exactly why you love them), read about things you plan to write about as a form of research (you can learn some fun, weird stuff that way), read about things completely unrelated to anything you would ever want to write.
Storytelling is an art form, so there's no formula, you have to learn it by "feel." And the only way to do that is with experience!
...oh dear. I believe I've done it again. I've posted a wall of text. Bad habit, sorry, but I get enthusiastic about storytelling and helping people get better at it (or getting better at it myself).
As for the biology controlling sexuality trope, which is disturbingly common in trans and gender bender fiction, there are some easy ways to avoid it. Show the character has interest before the major change in their life (such as transitioning or, in some weirder and often amusing cases, taking a blow to the head) in little ways, like catching themself staring at a person's butt, or the like. You can still keep that sense of revelation when they realize their attraction after the major change, too, you just have to show the character being in denial of their attraction, or oblivious to it.
"Well of course I was staring at that girl's boobs, they were bouncing everywhere like they were possessed! I couldn't not look, it was so distracting!"
"I'm just staring at that guy's butt because I want to know what brand of jeans he's wearing, they look really comfortable! That's a completely normal thing for a straight guy to do!"
"I couldn't stop staring at the gentle curve of her neck, something about it kept drawing me in, making me feel almost... happy? Fascinated? I don't know what this feeling is, but I kinda like it."
And then you later follow it up with the shock of realization, that sudden moment of "Oh. That's not normal for straight people, is it?" or "Oh. So that's what that feeling is. No wonder I was never all that interested in talking about boys/girls."
It's about increasing the intensity of emotion from "something" to "something more" instead of going from "nothing" to "something."
...oh god I did it again this is also a wall of text.
@MaskedCritic Seriously, thank you for the advice here. I think one of my biggest flaws is writing romance, especially the beginning of one. I've written and scrapped a good half-dozen stories at this point, and practically all of them I felt like the romance part felt off somehow. So seeing your point about not making it perfect and having conflicts is already helping me realize why it felt off. Honestly, I should probably start uploading chapters as I write them instead of how I do it currently where I just wait till the entire thing is done and then edit it to hell and back. That way I could actually get feedback as I write. Anyways, thank you so much for the help here, I really do appreciate it.