“Tell him I am sorry, Jian ge ge. I can no longer keep the promise.”
“Lan, you don’t have to do this. Ge will find another way.”
The lady in red smiled, slowly covered her face with a red veil, and gave the man a reassuring squeeze on the hand. Turning her back on him, she tore away from the man’s grasp and entered the carriage, the only sound coming from the bells tied around her ankles and the rustling of cloth. Once inside, the lady in red no longer bothered with the outside world, having accepted her fate. Instead, she allowed the tears to fall, staining her gold embroidered dress a dark crimson, the color of blood.
Her entire life had been filled with this color that was meant to be auspicious yet carried with it the scent of death. Yet, she felt no hate for it. Her heart had been numbed to this emotion called hate a long time ago.
“Lan, remember, ge will always be here. If you can not take it anymore, come back. Ge is not afraid of the consequences.”
The lady in red nodded her head from underneath her veil, not truly promising anything. Her fate had already been sealed the moment she stepped onto the carriage. In this lifetime, she would never return again. Even her ashes would not be able to rest peacefully in her homeland but left to wander in a foreign land.
“Cough...Cough…it is time to set off. If the consort does not set off now, she will miss the auspicious date and have to wait another six months.”
Turning around, the man listened to an old eunuch speak, his frigid eyes burning a hole into the back of the servile man whose face remained respectfully fixated on the gravel. Releasing a tense sigh, the man once again turned his attention to the lady in red and smiled reassuringly. She was only fifteen years old, he did not know how she would fare in that palace filled with venom. Truly, the man lamented: he had plucked her from the grasp of evil only to plunge her into another kind of darkness yet she did not mind, only speaking words to rest his mind.
“Lan er bids Jian ge good health. From now on, Jian ge must take care of himself. Don’t drink too much when the court officials bicker with the war generals. Jian ge must always treat the imperial concubines impartially and give imperial sister-in-law some face. Don’t interfere in inner court matters unless necessary, those are things imperial sister-in-law can help handle. Don’t spoil Hui er and Zhang er too much or they will become indolent in their studies. Lastly, Jian ge must make sure to rest properly. This is the most important.”
Hearing the lady in red gently scold him for his habitual tendencies, the man only smiled indulgently, nodding his head to everything she had to say. When she was finally done, a sad glint flashed in his eyes before he quickly hid it behind a cheerful smile and he stepped away from the carriage.
As he did so, she parted her lips yet did not say anything for a long time. When she finally found her voice again, only a single cold phrase came out of her mouth, “Close the curtains.”
Seeing that the farewells had been said and the luggage had been properly packed, the eunuch signalled for the entourage to begin their journey. At the front of the entourage, a rough looking man nodded his head and urged for his horse to begin moving.
Slowly, each carriage successfully begin to move forward and before the man could get a final look at the lady in red, a maid servant had pulled down the curtains to the lady’s carriage. He could only get a glimpse of her red veil before it was hidden behind the curtains. The words he had fought off the urge to say remained stuck in his throat, suffocating him as he could only silently say ask them in his heart, ‘What about him.’
For a long time. He watched as her carriage made its way into the distance before disappearing and he knew, she was gone forever.
Underneath her veil, the lady in red clenched her fists tightly as the carriage slowly gained momentum and plodded through the gravel road. Her eyes were red and her crimson lips slightly bled as she suppressed the suffocating feelings in her chest. When she could no longer suppress it, the lady in red merely allowed her tears to fall and let the stabbing pain in her heart to intensify. She was a selfish mortal and left unsaid upon her parted lips was only one phrase, ‘tell him to forget me.’
She knew he would never forget her and she did not want him too. Ridiculing herself, the lady in red could only comfort herself by thinking, at least in this lifetime, she was not the one waiting. Then, she lifted her face and through her veil, as if she was looking at someone, the lady in red sadly smiled and whispered, “go back.”
