5 – THE WALK
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Here is another chapter from the woman's point of view. It is harder to write but easier to understand than writing from the man's point of view. The reasons for it would be explained in the next chapter. Please click the heart icon above before reading the chapter if you like this story. Hearts before reading, and comments after. Enjoy the ride.

CHAPTER 005

THE WALK

 

(The Woman’s POV)


Thus, we continued to walk away from the cave that served me and the deserter scum as a temporary shelter for the last few days. We walked for the better part of the morning through the dense and misty alder forest.

 

Although it was almost summer, the forest was as cool as an early spring day. The trail we were taking was providing an easy walk, but it was still hard to keep walking on the uneven forest surface with my hands tied at my back. Still, keeping up with that thing was even harder.   

 

All along the walk, just like the damned thing said, I tried to school my mind and organize my thoughts constantly in the fear of thinking something that may offend it unintentionally.

 

At first, I tried meditation but it proved to be a futile endeavor during a walk on the treacherous forest floor. Then I tried to recite the words of erk and visualize them but it only served me to think more and more about the thing that was walking on my back.

 

Later, I tried to recite the names of the sixty-five thousand five hundred and thirty-six celestial bodies from memory to occupy my mind. Not that I could recall more than thirty or so. Well, maybe twenty… 'Twelve?'

 

Despite all my efforts, it lasted just a little bit more than the better part of the morning until embarrassingly, it all devolved into counting rhymes and lullabies. At last, I was praying to every god and goddess I know, bright and dark, high and low alike to help and save me from my predicament. 

 

But whatever I did, I always thought of either something that the damn thing shouldn’t learn or something that I shouldn’t have known in the first place. In the end, I just gave up trying.

 

The more time we spent together the more it could have learned anyway and there was absolutely nothing I could do to prevent it. I really had no idea about the things it was doing in my head and its limits, but I couldn’t help feeling absolutely defeated. Thus, guilt and regret… 

 

I was greedy, too greedy in the first place. 'Why try to capture something that can blast someone with a single glance and even can use purple flames in the first place? Was I that desperate?'

 

Well, apparently I was… Sadly, I am still that desperate, even more so but only this time I am desperate to live instead of gaining merits. 

 

‘The betrayal of my so-called brothers really did a number on me, isn't it?' I sighed. 'I would have never tried to pull something like that in my right mind. I simply should have left the damn thing for dead in the first place.’

 

During the walk, I thought about the daggers inside my underclothes many times. But each time, I removed the idea in utter despair and defeat.

 

They were bandaged with gauze, one to the upper front, the other to the lower back. 'One in my fork and the other in my crack.' So, as long as it doesn’t keep its eyes on me I could get the one on my back even if my hands were still tied. But I didn’t think that the damn thing would be that naive even just for a moment. 

 

‘What about when we stopped?’ I thought again for the umpteenth time involuntarily. ‘It may untie me and even if it doesn’t, I can draw both daggers. Not easily or fast but I can still do it.' At this point, I was probably visibly grimacing under the weight of my thoughts. 

 

'Asking for a brief stop for ablutions? But then what? Fighting against a mind-reading demon in human skin with only two daggers?’ There was only a slim chance that it could work and it was very, very slim. ‘If only I could lead it to some sort of trap or an ambush…’ 

 

I was the guide thus I was the one leading, taking it anywhere I want as long as it was high ground. ‘So what?’ I removed that idea too as quickly as it came into my mind for the third time just in the last ten steps. 

 

I had no one in this damned place anyway. Not anymore... The only way to pull it was to rule the thing towards some remote village or encampment and incite locals against it, hoping that it was not strong enough to slaughter everyone, including me. 

 

Alas… Although not showing any form of reaction, I was absolutely sure that it was still reading my thoughts even now. How did I know? Well, that would have been what I was doing if I were in its place. There was simply no way. At least for now…

 

After a while, my stomach started to grumble, which reminded me of the breakfast that I have skipped. Knowing that the damn thing couldn’t have been better than me, at least made me feel good somehow.

 

It was unconscious from the late afternoon yesterday to the morning today and didn’t have any breakfast just like me. ‘It must have been starving now.’ I thought sinisterly, then a single question blasted my mind. 

 

‘What does a demon in human skin eat and drink anyway?’

 

 The answer was…

 

'Tender meat and the fresh blood of young virgin women obviously!’

 

Thus, I lost it all over again. ‘Did it spare me only to keep as fresh travel rations? Oh my…’ Again there was the guilt and regret, this time together with absolute terror all the way. Apologizing over and over in my mind in case it was listening to my thoughts. 

 

After an unknown amount of time spent in terror and silence, I finally heard its icy voice in my mind again. (Tell me about the Ponytail?)

 

The question was so abrupt that I couldn't adapt at first. My mind froze as I missed my step only for it to grab and hold me to spare me from another fall. 

 

'Ponytail?’ I thought for a moment after collecting myself. ‘Is it talking about the Coquet? Didn't it ask about him already in the cave? Why does it ask about the dead all of a sudden?' I shivered, either because of its icy tone in my mind or the talk about the deceased itself. 

 

Moreover... 'Why does it call him Ponytail? Is it spiteful because its hair is short? Wait! Do demons care about honor in the first place?’ was only one of the first things that came to my mind and it only spiraled for the worse after that.

 

Thus, I chastised myself again. ‘Yeah, just curse the damned thing over and over again so that it eats you alive not later but right now, idiot.’ 

 

“Died!” I answered without wasting any more time, just like the last time. Why was it asking it over and over again anyway? “You have killed him.” I followed and couldn't help but think ‘Not that I don't appreciate. Only if I didn't save you just to be get beaten and possibly eaten later.’ 

 

In the end, I was my own worst enemy. Even now, when literally my life depends on it I just couldn't help but think about the things that are guaranteed to enrage the only thing in the immediate vicinity that can grant me a long and painful death.

 

(Why were you fighting with him yesterday?) It asked again with a cold and nonchalant tone only a few moments after we have resumed walking as if my suffering has nothing to do with it. 

 

‘I was only defending myself. He and his dogs were the ones that attacked us first.’ I thought my answer, lying through my teeth without any shame. ‘Is it lying through my teeth or my mind when I am not even talking in the first place?’ 

 

However, my actual thoughts were more honest. ‘We were greedy. More like too greedy, and bit more than we can chew even before my stupid attempt on you.’ Even if it did care, it didn't show any sign of it. Its focus was on somewhere else completely. 

 

It only asked (You?) but the meaning was obvious. It was still vigilant for the nonexisting pursuit of scum that were my party members. Maybe that was the reason why I was still alive. It may be thinking to use me as a hostage just in case. 

 

‘Me and my former brothers.’ I answered truthfully this time, then added ‘Two young men.’ before even it asked. There was simply no way that he wasn't going to ask anyway. 

 

It remained silent for a few moments then asked (Why did you attack them?) coldly again. I don't know why it felt cold but it was simply like that. Whenever it talked in my mind I just felt cold inside my head. 

 

Everyone always told me that it was naive to give too much detail back in the okul but I always thought that it was my way of showing sincerity to tell those things and here I was, being interrogated by something that can take everything out of my mind even when I have lied. It felt cold… Cold and vulnerable like being all naked, out in the open on a white winter day. 

 

‘Their okul and ours are on bad terms.’ I answered simply but it remained silent. Thus I gave more details. ‘We are more than rivals but less than enemies. It is like there is an undeclared war between the two okuls.’ 

 

It didn't ask why. But even if it did I couldn't have answered. ‘Why were we killing each other if not for the resources and merits? It is not like they were the only okul that we were competing for resources anyway. But only with them, we were this brutal.’  

 

But one more time, its focus was on something entirely else. (What was that word?) It asked catching me completely off guard again. Its way of thinking was simply too alien to me.

 

It didn't care about me openly lying to its face, or talking about killing someone else for resources or merits. On the other hand, it was asking about my choice of words instead. ‘Which word?’ I wondered in anxiety and (The last one.) it answered. 

 

“Okul?” I asked aloud this time, puzzled, and (Yes. What does that mean?) it confirmed. Now, I have no idea what should one expect from an otherwordly demon but this was not one of them. ‘Sect, order, or simply school depending on the context.’ I answered its question. 

 

It didn’t ask anything about it after that. Instead, it asked other things from time to time during the long walk. It asked about the terrain, weather, and everything between at first.

 

Then it asked about the plants and the animals. It asked about nearby hills, lakes and rivers, settlements, communities, and roads connecting them. It asked what is edible and what is not, which water sources are safe to drink and which are not. 

 

It asked about the trade. (How do you trade?)

‘Using money?’

 

Then it asked about money. (What kind of money is there?)

‘Coins?’

 

Naturally, it asked about coins too. (What kind of coins are there?)

‘There are crowns and scepters and swords.’

 

Naturally, it showed coins -MY coins- he looted for confirmation after that.  It asked about anything and everything it saw and then some more.

 

(Is it close?)

 

(Is it common?)

 

(Is it clean?)

 

Even vermin didn't escape from the damned thing's curiosity 

 

(Is it dangerous?)

 

(Is it poisonous?)

 

(Can it fly?)

 

More often than not, it wanted me to answer those questions aloud but it didn't care when I didn't. Talking or thinking made no difference to it obviously.  

 

When it started to ask about the head and hand gestures though, I was convinced that it knew absolutely nothing, completely alien. It was trying to learn through me so that it can blend better within this world and its people. ‘May Yaren forgive me for helping a demon to spread its felony due to my cowardice.’

 

Some of the things it asked were easier to understand and reason, some were harder and some of them were simply crazy. One thing though, it never talked aloud, almost making me question my own sanity for answering phantom sounds in my head.

 

More importantly, it never answered any questions. Not even let me ask them. It was the one asking questions and it was adamant about that.

 

After some time, I realized that this kind of wordless communication put an enormous amount of stress on my mind. It gave me a headache and made me malleable.

 

Alas, I was already too tired to fear or care about the answers I gave at that point. Thus, when it started to talk about some kind of authority, I wasn’t paying enough attention to understand the importance of the things it asked first.

 

(What kind of authority holder are you?) It started, but the word felt out of context. 

 

“Authority?” I questioned aloud.

 

(Yes) It confirmed. (Authority, the ability to cast one’s will to alter reality.)

 

‘I don't know such a thing.’ I answered sincerely.

 

(You don’t?) It retorted and questioned afterward. (You and the Ponytail were casting your wills while fighting against each other yesterday, remember? Shields? Force Missiles? Anything that sounds familiar?)

 

I was already curious about the erk it used to blast the Coquet yesterday. Something that causes lightning, thunder, and wicked purple flames. A three-element erk of the highest order.

 

That was all the reason I have taken the risk to capture it in the first place. Well, maybe that and the possibility of binding such a powerful otherwordly servant in some way.

 

‘Woe is me. But what is this authority thing?’ I questioned myself for a moment then suddenly it dawned on me and I just lost myself in my thoughts. ‘Wait! WaitWAIT! ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ERK NOW? OHMY! YOU ARE TALKINGABOUTERK WERE-’ 

 

(Restrain yourself.) It suddenly cut my thoughts, (You are running wild again.) berated and warned me to only focus on the thing I was trying to convey. Its tone was not cold, but icy again.

 

That tone immediately chilled me and I exactly did what it wanted me to do. I schooled my thoughts and tried to ask the questions that were worming my mind. The questions that led me not to kill it in the first place -out of curiosity- and thus put me in this situation. Not that I expected it to answer but sometimes even silence could be considered an answer.

 

‘Are you talking about erk?’ I tried to confirm once more but only get another question as an answer as expected. 

 

(I don't know that word.) It conveyed its thoughts and added. (The last one.) 

 

"Erk?" I asked aloud this time just like it wanted me to do with the okul.

 

(What does that mean?) It immediately asked the next question.

 

‘Erk is the power to fulfill one's desires.’ I answered and added. ‘The ability to manipulate the erke that is found in anything everything.’ 

 

After my answer, it stopped asking. Fearing that the chance would be lost, I tried to resume the conversation by starting with the worst question I can possibly ask in this situation, only to hope to get an answer, any answer.

 

(Are you a demon in human skin?)

 

As soon as I asked the question it stopped abruptly, and so did I, turning slowly to face it. There it was, its brown eyes were piercing through without emotion.

 

Its cold and sinister gaze was zoomed on me. Then it tilted its head, and for a moment that almost felt like an eternity, it looked into my eyes without even a flinch on its face. Even its eyed didn't blink.

 

It was beyond creepy but I was beyond creeping out already. Without letting it skip the question like many before, I asked it again, aloud this time, and with much more power than before.

 

“Are you a demon in human skin?”

 

Then the damned thing burst into a booming laugh. I stood there, perplexed, not knowing how to interpret this or what to do. It laughed long and hard, and I have even seen a single drop of tear slipping from its left eye.

 

It wiped the tear with its index finger and then gestured at me with its hand, just like the way I taught it to do so not long ago, just to continue walking.

 

Thus, I resumed walking again. I was not expecting an answer really. I hopelessly hoped for one but not expected it anyway. Still, I was not expecting to be mocked either.

 

‘My pride is hurt, but at least I am not.’ I consoled myself. ‘I am alive and well.’ Yet my eyes stung and started to water anyway.

 

I was not crying, really. ‘It is just some kind of bloody flower dust caught my eyes, that's all.’ Thus, there was no need to wipe my eyes, and I continued walking silently.

 

I walked like that until it stopped me again with another thug on the leash. My wrists were freshly cut with the ropes and it was stinging constantly with each drop of sweat sliding through my forearms. 

 

I turned again with tears flooding through my eyes this time but couldn't bring myself to look into its eyes. It stood there, looking down at me and I waited for what was to come, looking at my toes, sobbing, but nothing happened.

 

Then, maybe dozens of heartbeats later I succeeded to stop sobbing. I raised my head to meet its eyes while still crying silently, but this time something was different. 

 

They were neither cold nor sinister this time.  Still looking down on me, not with contempt but… Sympathy? I looked at its eyes for an unknown amount of time. 

 

Again it looked into my eyes without blinking. Its face was like a sculpture not moving but somewhat it felt less alien this time. Not completely human, but not a demon in human skin either. Something in between.

 

Then it raised one of its perfectly human hands toward my face which awoke me from my daze with a blink. I flinched backward but was only able to put one more step between us due to the lashes it was still holding with an iron grip.

 

Just like that, the moment was lost, and its eyes grew cold and distant again. The transition was so fast, and the contrast was so stark that it almost felt unreal. 

 

It was so creepy that for a moment I was more afraid of the transition than the thing itself. Whatever it was, it felt like more than one, that was for sure. 

 

‘Maybe it isn’t a demon in human skin but a human possessed by a demon instead.’ I thought again and ironically this feeling rekindled my hopes.

 

There was something human in those eyes and maybe, just maybe the situation was not as hopeless as I first thought.

 

It was beyond naivety to think like that at this point. It was even at the border of stupidity but as stupid as it was, hope was the bread and butter of the destitute, just like the crones said.  

 

While I was basking in my newfound stupidity, it pulled the leash and drag me towards itself. Grabbing my nape with far more force than necessary, it pressed my body to the nearest tree and pressed its weight on my back.

 

It moved one of its hands to grab my hips, then fondling downwards moved toward the hem and into my robe. I should have been afraid of being sullied brutally and even killed after but to be honest, I was not.

 

‘Stupid!’ I thought again. ‘Was this some kind of mind-numbing erk that it has?’

 

It slowly moved its hand upwards this time only to reach my underclothes, and put its hand inside with one swift motion. I had no idea how and why but my mind was at ease at that moment.

 

Maybe because I knew what it was doing.  It was sheer audacity for sure and I detested myself for it just a few moments later. Still, at that moment, I was not afraid. 

 

It reached towards the hilt of the hidden stiletto and drew it leaving the hilt inside. Throwing it aside with a thud, it removed its hand from my back only to reach above my shoulder and inside of my robe again, from the top this time.

 

It found what it was looking for faster than time and without any unnecessary fondling, drew the second stiletto, and threw this one too. Just like the first, this stiletto too was stabbed somewhere with another thud. 

 

After getting rid of the last weapons on me, it started to untie my hands aggressively. It only let one loose, grabbing the other strongly, and turned me to face it only to tie them again but from the front this time. It zoomed its eyes to the knots it was tying which allowed me to watch its face without interruption. 

 

I could have bitten it at that moment and even torn its nose off with some luck. Not that it didn’t cross my mind, ‘But then what?’ I thought for a moment only for it to raise its eyes to fix mine, thus I get my answer. ‘I can't even think about doing it without the damned thing knowing.’

 

Finishing the knots, it just reached towards my backpack, bringing its face closer to mine as if it wants to tempt me to try to do it. It kept those emotionless eyes on my trembling ones, making even my knees feel weak.

 

I gulped involuntarily while its hand was still rummaging in the backpack only to put something in my tied palms. Without further ado, it turned back and started to walk again, this time it on the front and me on the back. 

 

I wish it was not taking the lead because our pace suddenly rose dramatically, making it pull and tug continuously. The ropes felt even tighter this time biting and cutting my wrists even more and I just lowered to look at the recompensation I got from that ordeal. 

 

It retrieved my stilettos on the way without stopping, and after the first one, it continued to give me more sokums -my sokums- without stopping or untying me. I slowly tore each sokum into bite-sized pieces and put them in my mouth one by one.

 

After finishing, it even gave me one of my water skins to wash it down. While feeding and watering me like I was some kind of exotic bird, it continued its questions but didn’t eat or drink anything, not that I cared.

 

My portion of rations and waterskins was the only thing that was left in the cave while those two ran away with everything I hold dear. It was an act of mercy for them maybe but it was nothing but humiliating to consume something that even scum deemed unworthy to steal. Even then I just ate silently, without crying. 

 

They didn’t just steal the money I was saving for the last five years and all my personal belongings. No, they stole away my hopes and future while leaving me to my fate with the Coquet. They even stole the future of my, no, -our- sisters and unborn.

 

But the worst part was that they knew what they were doing. They were not some random strangers. They knew who I was and what they were doing to me just like I know who they are and why they were doing it.

 

‘Let Yerlik be witness that as long as I survive this thing, they are going to pay even if it takes all my life.’ I swore vengeance using the name of the Lord of the Underworld. 

 

After that, we walked the rest of the way without communicating. He was silent and I was afraid. But there was more of it. I was curious too.

 

He didn’t kill me immediately. No, he took me captive then fed and watered me instead. This was not the treatment of an enemy, that was obvious.

 

Instead, this was the treatment of a captive, but the exact reason was beyond me. He didn’t use any right as captor on me yet but that didn't mean he was not going to use them later. ‘Tamag! He may even be saving me as fresh travel rations.’

 

Even if he didn’t believe me and left the camp immediately, we were already far enough, for him to do anything he wants. But just like I didn’t kill him while unconscious, he didn’t kill me after I was subdued.

 

He didn’t use me or abuse me either except for the rope cuts on my wrists. 'Damn, hey burn.' No, he only interrogated me but no torture was involved.

 

‘Maybe because I have answered everything he asked truthfully? Maybe when you read minds, torture was unnecessary?’ Not that he asked for some sensitive information or okul secrets.

 

He just asked random stuff. If anything, I was like a guide. An unwilling one at that yet a guide anyway. ‘But wait. Not him, it. I shouldn't forget even for a moment, for that would be my doom.’

 

When she says 'Tamag!', she is basically saying 'Hell!'. Not the same but close enough. Sokums are just wraps with mashed fillings. As I said before, the story is not Eastern (Japanes-Chinese) or Western (European-American) oriented. There are reasons for that and I am going to explain things as they come. But if I skip by chance, please ask anyway.

 

Add a comment. I don't bite, I swear. 

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