CHAPTER 009

EVALUATION

 

(Pinhan's POV)

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‘Why did she do it? Is she tired of living?' I thought while moving away from the woman, Yesim. 

 

No, it was not her fault. We have been bonded for more than half a day. Intellectual and emotional bonding type will constructs were not designed to be used this long in a single cast. The damn thing not only causes headaches but also messes with my emotions. 

 

'I must have lost my, reason somewhere during the conversation. She was curious and excited, just like me. The emotional resonance must be the real reason for this behavior.' I thought. I feel like a child in an adult's body all over again. 'Damn, I hate this will construct.'

 

‘Doesn’t matter.' Reason cut in. 'She is still the most dangerous wild element in this operation.'

 

'Well of course she is.' I agreed. She was the only external element after all. But Passion didn't agree with the rest of us. 

 

'Oh. Is she?' He jested. 'Pray tell me again. What was the name of this operation again? Lost?' 

 

Interestingly, 'Lost is as good as a name just like any other.' answered Reason without denying. Then he openly admitted. 'But of course,  yes. WE ARE LOST, and for that exact reason, she is dangerous.' Now that was as good an argument as any. 

 

But, 'Oh! We are lost, and that’s why she is dangerous? So you are implying that whenever we are vulnerable, anyone and anything should be considered dangerous?' countered Passion. Insecure? Yes! Despite my conscience, that was exactly what I felt right now. Insecure. 

 

'I do not imply Passion. I do signify.' Reason easily confessed again.

 

'One: Yes, we are in a vulnerable position.'

 

'Two:  Yes, everyone and everything is a threat.'

 

Practical? Yes, I was practical. I like to think that was one of my virtues actually.  

 

Then, 'So what should we do then? Kill her?' suggested Passion without meaning it. 

 

But that was the very thing Reason suggested apparently.  'That would be the best possible route of action.' Now that was callous. Was I callous? 

 

'God forbid! Passion fumed in rage. Was that really rage? 'She has not harmed us while we were MOST VULNERABLE. Why must you always be in such a paranoid? She has already passed the first test.' 

 

‘That was a sound argument. But I must tell... I was certain that she was going to run away. Every reading I get had suggested that outcome.’ I thought involuntarily. No one cared. 

 

‘Wish she had run.' Reason countered morbidly. 'That would be the best possible outcome.' But it was not said the best outcome for who.

 

Just like me, Passion wasn't buying that one. 'Best possible outcome for her obviously.' He said mockingly.  

 

Alas, 'Of course for her.' confirmed Reason. 'If she would have run, he would have gone on his own way.'

 

'Would I really?' I didn't have an objective answer for that one. 'I really hate when they call me with third-person pronouns.' I thought but again, no one cared.

 

'Without a guide and translator...' Passion pointed, indicating my own insecurities. Then 'But you miss the point. he continued. 'HE would have gone on his own way, but not YOU.'

 

That was a really high possibility, wasn't it? What would have happened then? 

 

'We can always find another one of those bandits, use him for a few hours and dispose of him.' answered Reason to my unasked question. Then, 'That would be safer both mentally and emotionally. Especially for you, Passion. You already started to show signs of emotional attachment.' he accused Passion. 

 

Was it that really? Emotional attachment? Was that the reason for that outburst?

 

'I am not emotionally attached.' Passion answered.  'I am simply following The Talion. Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth. She tied and searched us when we were, unconscious, MOST VULNERABLE.' The Talion? Really?

 

'You know it hurts right?' I thought. 'Stop saying most vulnerable.' That was really a sore point for me and both Passion and Reason knew it. For the first time in all my life and especially awakened life I was unconscious. I was definitely not going to forget that one.

 

Therefore as expected, 'Thanks to you.' answered Reason. 

 

But Passion didn't buy it. 'Thus we have tied, searched, and made her most vulnerable.' He announced. 'That’s enough. If you don’t want her near. Just release her.'

 

That was not possible and everyone knew it. But only Reason was willing to state the obvious. 'That won’t do. Either she dies or she follows and is tested REGULARLY until she fails eventually. The problem is the side effects of the bond.'

 

Yes, the bond was nasty but it was also necessary. It was the only way to communicate for now, and more importantly, it was the only insurance I had. The communication part would have been solved in mere weeks but trusting an unknown element was out of option. 

 

Still, 'Then just break it.' suggested Passion. 

 

'Naive...' I thought involuntarily. 'Noble but naive...' That is why you can't let social and emotional type subconsciousnesses decide your actions. Thank God, my first one was a rational type.

 

As I would have done it myself, 'That won't do too.' answered Reason. 'Again, she is too unpredictable to keep close without the bond.'

 

Then at last, 'Oh, God! Protect me from what I want.' Passion answered exasperatedly.

 

'Now, both arguments are sound.' I thought. 'Passion is emotionally attached and-'  

 

But, 'No! I am not.' he cut in.

 

'Well, you were listening after all.' I couldn't stand but pinned. 'Anyway... Passion LOOKED LIKE emotionally attached but of course, there is The Talion. From the moment I wake up and see her, she has never displayed any kind of hostile behavi-'

 

'Except for the time we woke up and took her hostage.' Reason cut in this time.

 

'This better not be a habit.'

 

But 'We attacked unprovoked.' Passion added hastily. 

 

Still,  'Tying and searching someone unconscious is a serious provocation.' Reason indicated. 

 

Just as 'That doesn’t count.’ Passion was saying...

 

I cut in to stop the word-slinging contest this time. ‘It does actually.' Damn, they were giving me headaches. 'There was some serious killing intent that could easily be felt through the bond back then.' I continued. 'But again I was the one that step up the game so it was expected.’

 

'Expected but not acceptable!' Reason agreed with an annotation.

 

‘Noted. Not acceptable.' I continued and 'I draw the red line markedly though.' added. 'Now, I must evaluate the situation objectively. First, I found myself somewhere I don’t know and I have no memory of traveling just to find myself again in a crossfire between two people I don’t know of.'

 

'Then someone has passionately screwed things up with friendly fire and left us unconscious.' Reason interrupted again. 

 

Thus, 'There was something wrong with this place and It was you that reported-' Passion started his answer. 

 

Only to be cut again. 'The report you ignored consciously?'

 

'Really? Stop this already. Enough!' I countered. 'Yes, Passion is unpredictable and inexperienced. Of course, he is. He is less than ten days old. He must have been recuperating and experimenting in a controlled environment instead of fending off unknown aggressors right now. It was inevitable.'

 

But, ‘He should have waited on the side and didn’t act on himself then.' Reason continued his accusations then Passion exploded, but not like anything before.

 

'My whole reason for existence is your own lack of initiative, remember? You always calculate, plan, reduce the risks and then calculate and plan again but DO NOT ACT. Your name is Reason, for God's sake! But you always stay indecisive when the decisive action is needed and here we are. In an unknown place, with no one to trust but ourselves, and with no parameters to either plan or calculate. Thus, I did what I exist to do. I TOOK ACTION!’

 

‘Noted. Sound argument.' I tried to calm the atmosphere. 'Reason is indecisive and devoid of action which leads to loss of initiative and opportunities. Still, Passion is inexperienced and trigger-happy.' Then owned up to my own mistakes. 'They are just like I designed them to be, only a little bit excessive without a middle ground, which I should be. Thus, this brings us here.'

 

In the end, It was all down to a single simple question 'What should I do now?’ 

 

As soon as I asked the question, ‘Kill the woman, and leave this camp immediately. Camp at higher ground and wait for the retaliation of the men we have killed.' suggested Reason immediately. 

 

Contrary, 'Keep Yesim alive, and stay here. We need to rest and she may serve as an invaluable ally if approached properly.  This place is extremely defendable to fight against unarmored bandits without heavy firepower, or dumruls specifically.' Passion gave his own suggestion.

 

Both arguments were sound and solid but that was not all of it. 

 

Thus, 'Using first names already?' started Reason voicing my concerns. 'Do you really think she gave you her real name? While I do agree that this position is defendable, it lacks an emergency exit route. Moreover, there is no evidence of the banditry of the two you have killed. Except for the word of the woman. She said they are bandits and you killed them. She may very well be playing us.' Was this my conscience speaking at last or was this Really Reason? It didn't matter in the end just like it didn't matter to Passion. 

 

Therefore, 'Still, you were the one that suggested taking no prisoners and even if she didn't give us her real name it shouldn’t make a difference right, Pinhan?' he pointed in counter. 

 

Now additional prisoners were a must. The men should have been killed sooner or later even out of suspicion. They were too close to the selected campground.

 

Wrong time, wrong place… However, taking prisoners first and interrogating them would have been a better action. I guess I was just too stressed to take such action. It had nothing to do with the things the bandits, dumruls as Yesim called them, might be doing to that family right now.

 

'Definitely nothing to do with that.'

 

Luckily, ‘Stressed and hungry. We always take sub-optimal actions and show emotional reactions when hungry.’ provided a tactical exit Reason which I took immediately. 

 

‘Hungry? Well, of course, I was hungry.' I thought but, 'Still, I refuse to believe that it affects my judgment that much.' I defended myself which made both of them answer immediately. 

 

'It does!'

'It does!'

 

Damn, traitors. 'Reluctantly noted.' I thought and then decided what to do. 'The woman, Yesim, will be isolated and shunned for the remaining part of the day. She is going to be tested one more time before dusk. The bond will be active until midnight. Then I will break it for the night. Her fate is going to be decided according to her actions during this time period.'

 

Interestingly, although reluctantly, both of my consciousnesses agreed on my decision without further ado. 

 

 Thus, ‘A sleepless night then.’ suggested Reason. Nothing new then. 

 

‘That is a must. Three watches of the night between the three of us.' I answered. 'We will stay in this camp tonight. But I am going to stay outside of the perimeter in a good ambush spot. She would be the bait. Traps and alarms should be enough for now but must be revised before the second watch. Unless stated otherwise any armed intruder should be considered an enemy, dumruls or not.' 

 

Now that was a plan and there was no objection. Armed intruder? Don't make me laugh. Anyone that is not confirmed as unarmed would always be considered armed. That was the routine after all. Still, ‘Next time, we must take a prisoner for interrogation.’ suggested Reason. 

 

‘I am going to.’ I complied but  ‘I was not talking to you.’  he answered curtly. 

 

‘Noted.' I thought and luckily Passion stayed silent. 'Let's continue to evaluate the current information then. First of all, if the woman is taken as the criterion, the locals have no idea what authority is, even the authority holders themselves. Instead, they name it Erk and speculate that they are weaving the external energy, Erke, to use it. Not casting or projecting.' I summarized the basis of the second part of the discussion. 

 

Reason took over from where I left and ‘This kind of approach usually indicates the use of an external source.’ he suggested which I agreed.

 

'Indeed…' I thought and added. 'Although the woman did cast her will before, she said that she can't anymore and the land is devoid of this Erke right now.'

 

Alas, ‘That is if the information she provided thus, should not be trusted.' Reson warned.

 

'Don’t be paranoid.' Passion objected. 'She was under the bond and was not lying.'

 

But ever cautious, 'Correction! She thought that she was not lying.' Reason corrected and pointed out the flaws of that kind of thinking. 'That alone doesn’t prove anything. Everything through the bond indicated that as soon as she left us she would run away, but in the end, she came back.’

 

‘Ok!' I agreed readily. 'I must refrain to trust any judgment made out of pure bond information.’

 

‘That would be wise.’ Reason approved my decision.

 

In the end, although crossed the line, she provided invaluable information during that last bout.

 

She said that no one can use erk in the cursed lands, here. That means, if the erke is really an external source like I suspected that it would be, then it means an internal source owner such as me would have the absolute advantage where the external source user such as she was restricted or had no access.

 

Still, just as Reason said, even though the woman believes what she said, it still was a critical piece of information that should be confirmed by multiple sources. Thus, new captives were required. 

 

Another type of critical information was the classification of the authority. She named multiple okuls that focus on different aspects of the so-called erk. 'According to the naming provided, it looks like an effect-oriented classification style but still, there is not enough information for a deeper evaluation.' I thought.

 

But, ‘Doesn’t matter.' Reson cut in. 'If this erke is an external source and if the access to that source is restricted or blocked in these so-called cursed lands, then staying in this place and establishing ourselves for information should be a strategical objective.’ 

 

'Too many ifs in one sentence.' I thought involuntarily. 'Don’t fold your trotters before you saw the stream. One step at a time. First, I must find a small settlement on high ground, away from population centers, trade roads, and military facilities. Everything else other than Central Command Interference should be considered later.'

 

Then I started to control the articles in the camp again without even casting a glance at Yesim who is still sitting in front of the fire and gazing at it with dull eyes.

 

The coins I collected from the two dumruls were in a pouch inside the inner chest pocket of my coat. Five red coins, and eleven white coins, unimaginatively named reddies and whities respectively. Some of the coins were bigger than the others, probably quarter, half, and full, but probably not.

 

Although I had no idea about the purchasing power of this amount of money, I just hoped that it would be enough to make a living for a few days in a small settlement and buy some necessities. I removed my coat and the poach and placed them near a log close to the fire, and continued to work on searching.

 

In the small cave near the campfire, there was a small stockpile of dry wood. It was cut, not collected and the amount of it was extremely high for a temporary campsite. Everything about the cave was indicating an intention of a long-term stay.

 

'Not a good sign.' I sighed internally. 

 

Apart from the wood, there were two saddlebags too big to carry without some kind of animal-of-burden or mount, which may suggest mounts that were not here right now. 

 

'More bad signs.' I sighed internally again.

 

There were plenty of clean spare male clothes, which was rather unfortunate due to the fact that none of the bandits were in my size. THey even smelt far better than anything they were wearing.

 

'Curious.!' I thought. 'Why do they stink like pigs when they have this many clean clothes?.'

 

Not finding anything worthy of mention apart from some light clothing and personal equipment, I walked towards another place of importance in the impromptu organized camps site, the tent.

 

The tent was circular with a conical roof. It looked like it was made of animal skins and something like felt. It was a little on the bigger side for something that looks like built for one night. Again, a sight that implies a camp for more than two people.

 

'There is going to be company that is for sure.' I thought again with a grimace.

 

Inside the tent was relatively empty, just like the small cave, with only two lumps that looks like sleeping bags and three small skins probably containing something more valuable than water, considering their smaller size compared to the water skins of the woman.

 

Apart from those two main parts of the camp, the only place of importance was the fire. There were a few sacks that is filled with foodstuff nearby.

 

The water was nowhere to be seen, but the presence of a big wooden bucket, together with empty earthen jugs and pitchers suggested the presence of a close water source.

 

Thus, I decided to patrol to find the water source and other possible places of importance around the campsite, leaving a shell-shocked woman that is still gazing at the flame.