Kirby - Zero Two - With Lyrics by Man on the Internet

I have spent the evening sulking, that I got whipped by a vegetable, it felt like a completely absurd notion. I wasn't sure what to make out of it, it was my first noticeable injury. Sure, I got scratches before, sore arms, feet, back etc. but nonetheless.

"It's not cool at all, the best I can come up with, is that I battled and got my first injury against a monster fusion. Haa… how does it even work? Do any monsters defeated close to each other fuse into a bigger monster or just some. If I defeat one, and wait out the 2 minutes for the loot drop, and then defeat the other… Or wait, what if there's a group of 3 or more of them… Well shiiit, I'm sure glad this piece of information was revealed now and not when I got too far in."

'I need another set of tests to know more. Does distance between the slain monsters play a part, or just the timing? Do different monsters fuse? Can the mana battery absorb the mana and stop the whole reaction?'

"Haaa… I am not getting much sleep today it seems. Ugh, why is it so fascinating!? Stupid fantasy dungeon, tempting my gamer instincts! How about some fantasy skills for me??? A bit of magic spells or something?? A fucking loot chest with weapons? Anything useful besides food! I am begging here!!"

'If the second floor was closer to the gate, I could take some throwing spears with me. A few holes should be enough to deal with the tomato-fusion. An item bag would work just fine too and even better in the long run.'

I let myself be immersed in wishful thinking for a bit. Out of boredom, without internet, I go to the kitchen and bake some more cake to replenish my stock.

Finished with baking I decide to enjoy the hot springs. 'Haaa… I regret not unlocking this sooner. A shower is nice and all, but a hot bath is better, if I could add a sauna too, and get some fizzy drinks, and some chips…'

"I fight monsters for a living! Where are my benefits? Korean hunters live like fucking celebrity assholes in novels. I get a large bathroom with 3 tubs for working 2 weeks straight! Well, almost, hmmm maybe 1 week of half days? What was my point again? Ahhh… Natural baths are great, let's leave it at that."

Soaking for an hour leaves me sluggish, so I wipe the floor a bit, leave proper cleanup for later and go to bed. Surprisingly I fell asleep fast, barely think about tomorrow, it must be the power of hot springs.

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SIWEL - Welcome To Hell (A Hazbin Hotel Song)

"This is NOT a song to wake up to! Fucking fish sticks! Now I will be expecting things to turn tits up at every corner! FY too devil!"

This can be a bad omen or just a coincidence. I am not a superstitious person, so I will simply be extra double carefully and leave a bigger safety margin.

Following the daily routine I go into the dungeon and try out the experiments I thought about yesterday.

First: two normal slimes. I had to poke both and wait for them to crawl close to each other. It was a failure, I got the normal 2 drops.

Second: a slime and a chicken-raptor. Another failed experiment.

The third: was the most dangerous. I've spent much more time looking for the best possible place to fight two chicken-raptors, than actually fighting. I've injured the first one enough to leave it prone and aggroed the second, dragging it towards the first. I finished them within 10 seconds of each other but nothing unusual happened.

"The fusion is either monster type specific or restricted to certain floors. It will be much later that I feel confident enough to try this on the second floor."

Checking the time, it shows 9.45 a.m. 'Plenty of time waisted today. I can go and try taking down a couple of tomatoes separately. Don't want to see any more whips today if I can help it.'

And so, I make quick descend to the second floor, looking out for a solidarity monster from the clearing.

"It would appear that these monsters come in pairs or I'm just unlucky."

This time I wait for the first tomato monster to turn into loot, before finishing the other.

"All turned out fine this time. It is likely that the fusion is caused by some critical mana density, or it's just a special gimmick of this dungeon."

I encountered another pair of tomatoes before heading back. Followed after a shower I check my loot.

From the tomato monsters I've got cherry tomatoes, and actual tomato puree.

"From I can see of the loot pattern, if I find some cocoa tree monster I'll get chocolate. Maybe a wheat monster plant will have alcohol as a rare drop? There is that little problem though, that if I'm not strong enough, I won't get anything and probably die a horrible death. Why can't I have a drone to scout the area for me? Ah, right, I am penniless, or is it Yen-less since I'm in Japan? Either way I'm flat broke."

'It is a pain in the ass to be broke in our time. I can't even go to a pawn shop, to sell some of my mana created stuff! THAT would be broken and an easier time for me.'

I catch myself complaining again, so instead I go to the gym to grow some more muscle for personal protection.

Just after noon, while relaxing on the rooftop with tea and muffins like usual, I can hear women's voices again. 'Haa… Again. Should I be happy or upset? All I feel right now is acceptance. Just a sense of not being bother by them. Like yesterday, they come, and they will leave me alone soon enough, to tackle the dungeon once more. Well, I feel like going to greet them by the entrance this time.'

POV Anna

Me and the girls are heading to the secret restaurant today again, without Meiko, as the girl is busy working herself to the bone. I would be a bit more concerned about her if she was pushing herself physically over the limit, but today she is working to bring in more support to her Lady.

Like a gallant knight giving her all for her princess. Though the princess isn't a delicate flower, but a rose with thorns. Even us, third years know of the Kurihara eldest daughter.

'Well, Meiko already won our thrust and support, so I imagine that half of the club will side with them. The election is still a month away, I'm sure such an honest and hardworking girl will draw in more support by that time. It would have been fun to have her in our year, but alas, this is our last year.'

"Tai: Meiko recommended asking for ice cream, if it's as good as the rest of the desserts, I'll stuff myself full!"

'There is also that. The mysterious restaurant in the middle of the forest. It just doesn't make any sense does it?'

"Anna: Even if it's our rest day, we can't just stuff ourselves with ice cream. We should balance it with some fruit. Like, maybe some fruit cake."

'Even I can't help it. The food here was practically flowing into my stomach and turning into pure energy. I know there is a saying, that girls have a second stomach for dessert, but it's ridiculous that I wanted second after eating dessert again. I don't think I'm usually so gluttonous and I didn't feel heavy at all . Truly mysterious!'

"Yumi: Ooh, look at that. We have a welcome party today! I call dibs on being the first!"

I can't help but smile at her behaviour. Usually Yumi is more reserved, apparently the sweets fully melted her heart, or conquered her stomach? 'Was it not the lady's role to conquer a man's heart through the stomach? I call this cheating.'

Today we are welcomed by a warmer smile than during yesterday's blunder.

"Valentine: Welcome, miss Yumi, miss Anna, miss Tai. May I know if you prefer a seat upstairs or here?"

"Yumi: Hello chef Valentine! I loved the cake you made very much! I think we agreed to sit upstairs again?"

"Tai: I liked the muffins the most! Very nice with tea."

"Anna: Hello again Mr chef. I do feel that the sun won't be too much for us for a while. We may as well enjoy the fresh breeze while we are here."

"Valentine: Very well. Shall I put on the kettle right away, or would you prefer cold drinks for now?"

"Anna: We just had some breakfast not long ago, so we came mostly for some desserts, and I would like some hot tea with a portion of ice cream."

"Yumi: Cake and juice for me pretty please!"

"Tai: Juice and some baked goodness for me please?"

"Valentine: Understood, it will be done in a moment. Please make yourselves comfortable while I get things ready."

After a bow the chef leaves for the kitchen and we head upstairs. Not a minute later he brings up warm towels, tableware and glasses, before leaving again.

"Anna: Oh, we could have helped with that, like Meiko did the last time. It does take some running around to get everything ready for us."

"Yumi: I wonder why he is the only employee here? It would be a nightmare to have more than one group of customers."

"Anna: From what Meiko said, this place is not officially opened yet. Maybe there will be more staff at a later date?"

"Tai: It sure is strange we didn't even notice how this place was built. There really is no open road leading here."

"Anna: I find it odd as well. Delivering everything by air would cost obscene amounts of money. Just making a narrow road wouldn't hurt the scenery or the nature too much, and it could be made into a footpath later, for students to come freely."

"Yumi: Yeah, Meiko said something about a conspiracy and influential investors, I'm not really good with political stuff. It just seems like someone is throwing money away."

"Anna: Ugh, don't remind me about those things. All that pretentious behaviour and posing, the world would be better off not having those types of people."

"Tai: Aaahhh, but you look lovely in a dress, like a proper high class Lady. Right Yumi?"

"Yumi: The one you wore during your birthday party was really lovely. Red matches well with your chestnut hair."

"Anna: You know my parents forced me into wearing that. I'd rather we had a pajama party by ourselves."

We chatted a bit between ourselves while waiting for dessert, and soon enough we could smell delicious pastry drawing near.

The ice cream was as delectable as I hoped, melting right into me. 'Ah, this is the life. Friends, sun, dessert and tea. This is really relaxing.'

"Yumi: Should we ask chef Valentine to join us? You know, to get to know him better?"

"Anna: Well… He is friendly enough, so maybe? It won't hurt to ask."

"Tai: Oh! How bold of you Yumi!"

"Yumi: Hey now! It's not like any of us are not interested about this place or the man working here. I am doing everyone a favour and asking the burning question."

"Tai: That is fair. I am also stumped as to how this restaurant came to be."

"Anna: I am very certain, I haven't noticed any construction going on in the forest during the last 2 years. I wish to ask about it too."

It is too much of a mystery to let it pass, so we decided to interrogate the chef. Yumi went down and invited him to join us. As a bonus they came back with more desserts and refills.

"Valentine: I am told that you all are interested in how this place came to be? Hmm… I honestly have no idea about the HOW this place was built. When I came into the picture, it was already fully functional and ready to be used. All the furniture, equipment, stocked up supplies."

"Yumi: Then how have you become a chef here?"

"Valentine: I would assume like most people do? I got a good offer and I accepted it. I get the benefit of being my own boss, more or less, and plenty of time to work on myself. Including Japanese language."

"Anna: Indeed your Japanese has a lovely accent. Is it British by any chance?"

"Valentine: Ah, yes indeed. Many people say that I have a British accent. I am originally from a small country in Europe, but I moved to the UK for my University year, plus some time working there. Must be remnants of that time."

"Tai: So, from Europe to England to Japan? A long way to travel."

"Valentine: That is actually a hobby of mine, visiting countries full of culture. I most definitely enjoyed my trips around Scandinavia. Lovely place for a vacation, brimming full of nature and unique culture. Not to mention the outdoors BBQ we had back then."

We listened to chef Valentine reminiscing about different trips. It was nice to know that Japan too is highly regarded by most, for its beauty and culture. Unfortunately, that made up the bulk of the deciding factors for his acceptance of the position, and he knows very little of the happenings around here.

'It can't be helped. The Hachimitsu Academy is very much a closed community, it would be hard to find any news about it on the outside. Can't blame him either for not knowing any interesting nuances about the creation of this restaurant. Maybe it was constructed before and renovated to serve as a restaurant recently. That could explain the lack of large scale construction activities.'

Chef Valentine explained that the restaurant is in a trial stage, sponsored by some wealthy investor of the academy, and that it is up to the academy to make the students aware of its availability.

'Yup, I smell political gibberish going on. We really should thank Meiko for letting us know. Hm hm hm, usually it is the normal people who get the short end of the sticks, being stuck in the crossfire. Getting a helping hand, a friendly offer to work for me, would put a bit of gratitude into him. Besides, it would be a win-win for everyone, a skilled chef getting an understanding employer and I'm getting a loyal chef. He, he, he.'

As shameful as it would be to admit, we have apparently eaten quite a bit, judging by the number of empty plates. 'Uuugh, it can't be helped, I barely feel full, but instead a pleasant feeling of satisfaction. Haa that's not fair, now we will have to work extra hard tomorrow.'

"Tai: Fuaa, I know we ate enough already, but I'd like some ice cream before we go."

"Yumi: I think I'll have some too."

"Anna: Ok, I'll have some as well."

Time passed pleasantly as we finished eating our last serving. The chef insisted on cleaning up our table and heading downstairs, to let us relax in a familiar setting.

'Even if it's a girls' only academy, no one is actually such a sheltered princess to feel threatened by a man's presence. Probably. Such a silly reason to isolate such a lovely restaurant, however it does give us a chance to benefit from the slow, peaceful, quiet atmosphere by ourselves, and maybe a few close friends.'

"Anna: Are we in agreement to keep this place secret from most of the students?"

"Yumi: It would be a shame if our special spot was crowned. I like being given  personal attention by the chef."

"Tai: Yeah. If, say, over 10 people come at the same time, I imagine the chef both, stuck in the kitchen and running from table to table without rest."

"Anna: One person can only do so much. I'm guessing the capacity here is around 50 people comfortably, between both floors. Soo… 6 more staff at least? That would turn out like any other restaurants in the city, so I readily agree with Yumi. I also doubt the academy will make an announcement before the new student counsel is settled in. I say we keep it to a select group of close friends and get half a year of indulgence out of it."

"Yumi: Agreed! Can you imagine what will happen to all the confectionery if all the girls knew about the chef's skills?"

'Oh!? Now THAT is something that will be completely disheartening! Mmmnn the sweets just have the perfect homemade feel to them, they must be time-consuming to make.'

"Tai: Yeeep, being told that they are out of stock for desserts!? No way!"

"Anna: Indeed ladies. Now then, if we are to ask for some takeout dessert for after dinner, we will have to work extra hard tomorrow. No excuses."

In the end none of us could resist the allure of fresh pastry, and took some for the evening. Weekend well spent.