17: Short Flowery Sundress
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After Ms Monahan had cooked us breakfast Maddy had to go to work to sort something out. In a revelation that amazed absolutely no one, she worked at the local library. I imagined her wandering around the shelves putting books away and messing with her big glasses. Goddess that was a cute image.

I was left alone with Ms Monahan in her clean modern living room, and I felt super awkward about it. She was sitting on her couch regarding me with a contemplative stare. She seemed on the verge of wanting to talk about something, but hadn’t yet decided on the wording.

“Um… I might go and look at skateboards and stuff. Now that the power is finally back on. I guess I’m going to need a new one since everything that happened…” I said awkwardly into the silence.

“Oh no, your skateboard is by the door you needn’t worry,” she winked, then seemed to finally decide to talk about what she wanted, “I think I may go around to visit your parents. Possibly try and speak to them or retrieve some of your belongings. It’s probably a lost cause, but I feel as though I should try.”

“You’re going to go back to my… my parent’s house and talk to them? But isn’t that… I mean like won’t that be a bit scary?” I said uncertainly. I was a little worried for her. My parents were the sort to yell and scream at people they didn’t like who pissed them off.

“I’ve handled belligerent parents before my dear Eloise, never fear,” she reassured me with a smile, “I don’t expect them to agree to anything if I’m honest, but I’d like to see these despicable people for myself.”

“Oh… well I guess have fun…?” I said, a little confused that anyone would willingly interact with any of my family. Except my brother. He was okay.

Ms Monahan snorted and shook her head, “I very much doubt I will.”

“Yeah… well I think I’ll go skating and see if I can find my friend Brook. She didn’t return my texts last night,” I told her.

“Alright, we have our days sorted then. I’m going to go and fetch my keys, would you like a ride anywhere?” she asked as she stood up.

“Nah I should be… wait where is this? Where are we?” I said, realising I had no idea where her house was.

“Ten minutes north of White Plains. By car that is. Considerably longer by skateboard I should think,” she said wryly.

“Okay… a ride to White Plains then… that would be nice thank you,” I said hopefully. I know she’d just offered, but sometimes my parents had refused to follow through on an offer when I changed my mind on the spot like that. Something about teaching me to be decisive and stick to my guns or something. I don’t know.

“Not a problem. I’ll let you out at the mall,” she smiled.

“Okay! I’ll go get changed!” I said hurrying off.

 

****

 

The drive over was strange. Ms Monahan asked me about myself, what I wanted to do with my life, and what I liked to do for hobbies. She was trying to get to know me I guess, which was fair. I would be staying in her house after all. I still couldn’t believe I was going to be staying with my cool and really nice professor from college. My life had become so different since the third Emergence.

Once I had been dropped off at the mall, I was free to do what I wanted. Seeing as how I had very little in the way of money, I decided to forego the mall entirely, instead setting off on foot towards the skate park. I hoped to find Brook there, but otherwise I’d have to go and bash her door down. Not literally of course.

Before I set out I looked down at myself. I was wearing the first outfit again, which was my grey tank top and skinny jeans. I wish I had a larger wardrobe. I needed to find a job. One that wouldn’t set my anxiety off constantly, or I wouldn’t last a week there. I’d tried to have a job once, but it had been as a sales guy at a mobile phone company, and the sheer number of confused and angry people I’d dealt with turned me into an anxious mess. My parents had not been pleased when I came home having been fired.

They had never really cared about or tried to understand the magnitude of my anxiety. I was constantly fighting it, fighting myself. I knew I was overreacting to things that were relatively mundane, but I was powerless to stop my brain and body from working together to make my life hell. It felt like there was a piece of me that was apart from the rest, watching my freak outs with a weary shake of its head.

I was just about to place my board on the ground to move out when I heard shouting nearby. I could see a girl and a guy my own age arguing furiously, the guy was growling in his low deep voice while the shrill angry girl was attempting to beat him in the argument with pitch alone.

The guy was huge, in that way guys are when they’re super buff and they have a big frame to boot. He was so stereotypically attractive and masculine it hurt. It looked like he went to the gym almost too much by the size of his muscles. Wow. If I was straight, I’d be calling him all sorts of hunk related words, but I’m not... instead I was looking at the girl.

She was his match in feminine beauty, especially wearing that short flowery sundress. Her hair was perfect, despite her vigorous gesticulation, her nails were perfect, her body was hot as hell and her face was beyond pretty. After my dumb lesbian brain was done noticing her looks, I also noticed that I knew her. Sort of. She’d been one of that trio of girls who saw me unintentionally perform a trick when I almost fell down the stairs on the first day of the semester.

I didn’t want to eavesdrop, but at the same time it was fascinating to watch. I couldn’t hear the words they were flinging at each other, but I imagined it was pretty heated. I was never good in situations like that, as had happened last night. Arguments just destroyed my ability to react in any way other than tears. It wasn’t that I was sad or anything, it’s just that the stress of it all ended up boiling out of my eyes.

The girl I’d met briefly had no such problems. She was standing her ground in the face of that dude like she was the one who could break him in half and not the other way around. I guess in a sense she might be able to, it just wouldn’t be visible.

The fight ended with the guy storming off, while the girl sat down on a bench and put her head in her hands. Was she crying? She’d seemed so strong a moment earlier when she’d been arguing with him. Maybe I should go and talk to her…

I decided to just walk over and sit down. She could talk if she wanted to I guess. I’m not very good at this type of thing and suddenly I was feeling very self conscious and awkward. Did I do the right thing? I put my board on the ground and idly rolled it back and forward. I could feel some resistance from one of the bearings. I’d need to take that apart and clean it out. I wonder if Ms Monahan had some oil I could use.

The girl’s sniffling slowed down a little, and she got a handkerchief out of her handbag. She wiped her eyes, blew her nose, then got a little makeup mirror out and inspected herself. Her mascara had run a little, but otherwise there wasn’t a whole lot of damage to her makeup.

“Good,” she said to me, “I still look good, but I definitely look like I’ve been crying. Time to show instagram what that cheating asshole did.”

What did she mean? Was she really going to take a picture of herself after crying?

She was indeed. She pulled out her phone and messed with her hair a bit, then shifted her expression into one that was more upset that it was already. She took a few pictures, flicked through the ones that she didn’t like and deleted them. From my vantage point I couldn’t really tell the difference between any of those photos, but I wasn’t exactly femme so I guess maybe I’d figure it out if I ever got into selfies and makeup.

I watched her post the photo she picked onto instagram with the caption ‘Broke up with my boyfriend. Asshole cheated on me with that bitch Harriet.’

Well that answers what their argument was about.

“Who’s Harriet?” I asked.

“Dumb bitch who takes business managment with my dick ex. She came onto him so hard and like everyone could see it but no one told me because of the drama. He went right along with it and I had to find out when I saw them making out. Ugh and now I’m upset and I’m going to cry again,” she said, tearing up all over again.

“That’s rough…” I grimaced, unsure of what else I could say.

“Oh yeah it’s rough. Boyfriend of three years cheated on me. I should have seen it coming too… oh my god I bet he’s done it before too. I bet all the times he said he was busy he was actually fucking other girls. This is so much worse oh…” she said and began bawling once more.

“Um… would you… would you like a hug?” I asked tentatively.

“Okay. That… sounds nice,” she sobbed flopping sideways against me.

Oh geez I didn’t think she’d say yes. I put an awkward arm around her shoulders and let her cry on my own shoulder for a bit. She spent a minute or so like this, just crying into my shirt until she was once again able to talk.

“How do I know you? Sorry, I have a lot of friends, sometimes I forget if I made a friend or where I met them or whatever,” she said, and I thought I might have even detected a hint of chagrin in there.

“We’re not friends really. I’m the chick who did that trick coming down the stairs on the first day this semester. You said it was impressive and asked for my name. Then you said my name was cute,” I explained, feeling myself flush as I recalled the compliments.

“Oh right! The skater chick, and you’re even wearing the same outfit!”

“Ah… yeah. I don’t really have many clothes sadly,” I sighed.

“Wow how do you live like that? Are you like… poor or something?” she asked, dropping her voice to a whisper when she said the word poor.

Okay… clearly someone comes from the types of circles my parents aspired to be in.

Shrugging I said, “I guess I am now yeah. My parents kicked me out last night.”

“What! Why? Did you get caught doing drugs?” she asked, leaning back a bit in shock.

“Uh… nah. They kicked me out cos…” I started, then paused. Did I really want to mention that I was an Emerged trans girl? Probably not right away. We’ll go with lesbian then, “They kicked me out because they found out I’m a lesbian.”

“Oh… that sucks. Your parents sound kinda mean,” she frowned in sympathy, then a thought occurred to her, “You’re not like, hitting on my right now are you? Like you’re not coming in all helpful to try and get me to sleep with you are you?”

I felt an instant flush burn from forehead to chest and I frantically waved my arms, “What? No no no! I mean you’re cute but I’ve got a crush on this other girl and I don’t know I guess I like nerds and you’re not a nerd you look way too cool for me and…”

I stopped my babbling very out of breath when she interrupted me by giggling, “It’s okay whoa. I would totally do the same thing. Sex helps people you know? Gotta fuck the bad feels away and all that. I’m straight though so it wouldn’t work okay?”

“Yeah um… fine. That’s fine. Yup, Uh… I should go and… find my friend,” I mumbled, too embarrassed and wanted to run away. Far far away. Anxiety levels are at maximum captain! Our Engines are primed and ready to make the jump out of here!

I stood up and tried to walk away, but she grabbed the other end of my board and looked up imploringly at me, “Wait no I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it like that it’s just… god. Sorry! Can I like, follow you? I like need new friends… my old ones all knew and they were laughing at me behind my back. I know I’m like a dumb blond airhead and shit.. All you rebel people look at us like gross but…”

Did I want to let her tag along? I was going on a hunt for Brook, so she might get bored and stuff. It might be nice to try and make a new friend though. However different we might be. She was a bit… spoiled though. She was obviously from a wealthy family and a little out of touch with people lower on the money chain. Whatever, if worst comes to worst I could ditch on my skateboard.

“Um… okay sure. I’m trying to find my friend, cos she ignored my texts last night and I want to see if she’s okay,” I explained.

“Okay! That’s fine. I just don’t want to go home. My parents will flip out when they hear we broke up. They were like planning a wedding and shit,” she said sadly.

“Okay… well we need to get on the bus then,” I said.

“A bus? Why not a taxi? I don’t really want to get on a bus…” she said, making a grossed out face.

“Because I don’t have the money for a taxi…” I said, my patience taking a hit.

“Oh! I’m so sorry! Uhh, let me pay for the taxi?” she asked, looking embarrassed for either herself or me, I couldn’t tell.

“Uh I guess if you’re paying that’s okay,” I shrugged. She was like a lost nice version of my cousin.

She didn’t wait any more than that, getting up and striding to the road, already waving for a taxi. I sighed in resignation and followed her. This was either going to be very frustrating or kinda fun. I couldn’t wait to see how she interacted with Brook. That was going to be hilarious, they were like polar opposites. One out of touch rich girl and one chilled out bisexual player. Who will win in the battle of the century?

We jumped in a taxi and I gave Brook’s address, hoping she was there this time. If not I had someone else with me who I could distract the two guys of the flat with. Wait, what was this chicks name?

I turned to her in the back of the taxi and asked, “Um... sorry… what’s your name?”

“You don’t know my name?” she asked, seeming genuinely confused that I didn’t know.

“Uh… no I don’t. I’m sorry,” I winced. Oh no.

“I’m like pretty famous on instagram… do you not have instagram?” she asked, again affecting that whisper as though we were talking about something scandalous.

“No I don’t…” I said awkwardly.

“Oh you have to get it!” she said excitedly.

She proceeded to make me download it on my phone, then sign up and immediately I had to add her. It was only through instagram that I learned what her name was. Rosemarie Banks. Her instagram handle was Rosiestardust. The whole thing was a little too intense for me though, and I didn’t think I’d be using instagram at all after this.

When we arrived at Brook’s place, Rosie paid the taxi driver and got out next to me. We looked in at Brook’s apartment. Here goes nothing I guess.

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