[Vol. 3 pt. 47] Patch 8.0: The Temple in the Forest
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“We’ll let Rock take the lead. I doubt tentacles are going to be able to do anything to her, though it’s not like they want to do anything to the rest of us anyways,” Oleander says.

“I guess being made out of rock makes her a pretty good tank,” Rao agrees.

“Now that I’m thinking about it, I have no idea how there aren’t a hundred other random animals made out of whatever Fenny gets attached to. He gets attached to even the dumbest of things way too easily.”

Rock looks up at Oleander and whines.

“I don’t mean you, Rock. You’re a good girl, not a dumb thing.”

Rock barks and wags her tail.

A tentacle lashes out from the darkness and slams into Rock! She yelps from surprise as she was distracted looking at Oleander, and her new protector refuses to allow the tentacle that attacked her to escape.

Shogun snarls and bites the tentacle as it’s trying to retract!

They all hear a guttural cry come from somewhere in the darkness as Shogun violently shakes the tentacle around in his mouth, sinking his large fangs down into it until purple blood splashes out from the wound and splatters on the ground.

“Gross, bro,” Rao tells his faithful steed.

Ignoring his master’s disgust, Shogun brings the tentacle down to the ground and sinks the claws on his paws into its length.

Two tentacles lash out at Shogun, but they both get blocked by Rock positioning herself between them and him. She even manages to bite onto one of them herself!

“They make a good team,” Rao says.

Three tentacles now lash out at the two canids, and each of them is distracted.

Thanks to the materials that Rao helped Oleander gather, though, Oleander is able to support them by shooting several enlarged thorns down into the abyss.

Whoever or whatever the tentacles belong to, it makes a shrieking cry after having several of its tentacles impaled and shot right back down at itself.

“Damn, you all make a good team. Just let me know how I can help,” Rao says.

“Just don’t get in the way. We’ve got this,” Oleander says, preparing a few more thorns.

While Rock, Oleander, and Shogun fight their way through the tentacled abomination trying to stop them, Fenrir and Cassiel turn down a hallway and find a horde of undead on both sides.

Fenrir’s attempt at slowing them down using the torches has done little to actually stall them, and now they are surrounded.

Their only hope is the closed door they notice they’re standing next to.

“In here,” Fenrir says, pushing the door open and pulling Cassiel inside.

They shut the door as soon as they get inside. Fortunately, there is a bookshelf and table that they can push up against the door to help keep it shut in case the undead know how to use doorknobs.

Fenrir doesn’t question why some underground tunnel full of undead has a door with a doorknob. He just chalks it up to fantasy game logic.

“What is this place?” Cassiel asks, looking around the room.

A couple of burning torches hang from the walls, there is a dusty bed and furniture scattered around – it looks like somebody once lived in here, but who?

“Maybe some player decided to try and be a necromancer?” Fenrir suggests.

“Maybe,” Cassiel answers.

They both jump when they hear the undead outside pounding on the door, trying to open it.

Fortunately, they don’t try turning the doorknob.

“We should be safe in here until we figure out what to do,” Fenrir says.

“We just have to figure out what to do,” Cassiel replies.

“Yeah, easier said than done. At least we can wait until you can finish healing me, and they might lose interest after a while.” Fenrir walks over to the bed and sits on it after brushing some of the dust off. “I need a captain’s quarter on The Shoebill with a real bed in it.”

“And what about the rest of us, bastard?”

“You can sleep with me.”

“Corwin, Tabitha, Oleander, Rock? That new asshole you’ve brought with us?”

“Yeah, I guess it wouldn’t really be fair to have the rest of them sleep on the hammocks while we’ve got a bed.”

Cassiel sighs and takes off her breastplate. Underneath her breastplate is just a simple, sleeveless vest that does little to suppress the size of her breasts.

“Isn’t it uncomfortable to wear that armor? It makes your chest look like, half the size that it actually is,” Fenrir asks.

“You get used to it. It’s not any more uncomfortable than a sports bra,” she answers.

“You know what you should get? Bikini armor. That’d be awesome,” he teases. Personally, Fenrir has never liked bikini armor. He actually prefers the conservative, realistic armor that Cassiel wears over some skimpy little metal bikini that he’s already seen other players back in the city wearing.

Both the men and women had armor like that.

“I liked you better when your head was making you say stupid things,” Cassiel says with an annoyed huff.

“You mean like how I love you and was complimenting you?”

“Y-yeah, that.”

“Want me to do it more?”

“Well! It’s – it’s at least a better time for it now since we’re not being chased.”

“You’re right. I guess it’s even kind of extra fitting since all that’s between us and certain death is a doorknob and some furniture. It’s like… our last stand, and this is the final part of a movie where we tell each other how much we love one another before getting overwhelmed by zombies.”

“You’re stupid.”

“I know, but you’re the one who loves stupid.”

“I just love you, not your stupidity.”

“I guess I love you more then since I love all of you, even your grumpy tsun side that calls me a bastard and threatens to kill me.”

Cassiel blushes and grabs him by his collar. “I – you – you don’t! I love you more, you bastard! Even your stupid side!”

“Nope. I love you more,” Fenrir says with a teasing smile, knowing exactly where this is going.

While he’s teasing her about it, she grows even more frustrated and competitive. “I love you way more than you love me! I bet you’ve never caressed my face while I sleep, but I’ve done that to you, so I win because I – I…” she realizes what she’s saying.

Fenrir, also realizing what she’s saying, joins her in embarrassed blushing and silence.

“Let’s – let’s just say we love each other the same,” Fenrir suggests.

“No. I – I win,” Cassiel mumbles.

“Fine, fine, you win.”

“So, you’re saying you don’t love me as much as I love you?!” she shouts, just as worked up as she was before and standing in front of him.

Fenrir, deciding to use actions instead of words, grabs her by her hips to pull her closer before kissing her on her lips.

Cassiel’s eyes go wide and she blushes even more fiercely than before, but she wouldn’t dare pull away from his loving embrace.

“We love each other equally, alright?” Fenrir asks in a hushed voice.

“D-deal,” Cassiel agrees, “but only – only if you kiss me more.”

“I guess having a bunch of undead really does put people in the mood.”

“Don’t ruin the moment, you bas—”

Fenrir presses his lips back against hers.

Back at the entrance of the caves, the useful trio has fought their way down to the bottom of the stairs while the useless tagalong has been watching them fight and commenting on almost every bit of action.

Shogun, Rock, and Oleander all have spots of purple blood on them, and a trail of it leads deeper into the cave.

“It ran away. Wimp,” Oleander says, trying to shake some of the blood off of his arms.

Rock and Shogun do the same by shaking their entire bodies. Rock has more success since she’s just rock and rock doesn’t exactly absorb liquids, but Shogun whimpers when he notices that his fur is still dyed purple.

That’s when Oleander realizes it.

“Rao, I’m realizing why Rock and Shogun get along,” Oleander says.

“Why?” Rao asks. “Isn’t it just because they’re both animals? You know, like if you go to a dog park, the dogs are just gonna like each other without any reason, bro.”

“Sure, that might be part of it, but more important than that is Shogun is basically a fox and feral version of Fenny which is probably why Rock likes him so much. I guess it’s true what they used to say about kids dating people like their parents.”

“Isn’t that kind of gross though? I’d never date anybody like my parents. I don’t want to picture my dad or mom while doing a girl.”

Oleander has to agree with that, which hurts his theory about why Rock and Shogun get along so well, but the more he looks at Shogun and watches his behavior… yeah, Shogun and Fenrir are basically the same. Shogun keeps on putting Rock first, gets into playful fights with her, whines when his fur gets blood in it, puts himself in danger for her – Oleander has his theory and he refuses to think it might be wrong. It’s too cute to be wrong.

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