The problem that Fenrir now faces in regard to hiring a secretary is that he has no idea who to hire for one. Whoever he hires needs to be: loyal, dependable, willing to work and travel, and not be somebody who already has something better to be doing.
That narrows it down to only a few people, and those few people have been gathered for one-on-one interviews onboard The Shoebill.
“No thanks,” Serra says. “Too much boring work and too much talking to other people.”
That’s one candidate down.
“No, and why are you being so proper about this? Couldn’t you have just asked us back when you said you wanted to interview us?” Cassiel asks.
“I don’t know, honestly,” Fenrir answers.
Cassiel sighs and says, “It’s not that I don’t want to help you, but I’m not good at that sort of stuff.”
That’s two candidates down.
There are only three more, and two of them are his other girlfriends.
“You wish for I, the great and awesome and dark Wielder of the Cursed Flame of Bahamut, Azalabulia, to serve as your secretary?!”
“Yeah,” Fenrir answers. “Can you?”
“Such a job is far beneath me! A-and… I don’t think I’d be any good at that, and I have a lot of lesson planning to make up for, so…”
Three candidates down.
“A secretary?” Nell asks. “That sounds wonderful! Just imagine all of the wonderful things we could do with such a setup! There is the cruel, sadistic boss demanding his secretary to perform jobs that he knows she will fail at. There is having her sit on her knees between his legs underneath his desk to service him as he talks with others. There is even the situation of the boss deciding to punish the secretary by having her perform in front of others during a business meeting, or passing her around to others during a party! Ah, and then there is the scenario of the secretary’s employer being a married man, and the secretary must fight for his love and attempt to seduce him behind his wife’s back, but—”
“You’re squirming around a lot,” Fenrir says.
“A-ah, excuse me,” she says before clearing her throat. “I am already performing a role similar to being your secretary, am I not? After all, I have been diligently relaying messages between you and our serpent friend!”
“Speaking of her, we really need to name her. Have any suggestions?”
“Oh, my hero, you do not know her name yet?”
“No? She… she has one?”
“Of course she does!”
“What is it?”
“How long have you known about her name?”
“Only recently, to be fair.”
“Huh. So, Ilo. Ee-low. I, L, O?”
“I would assume that is how it is spelled, my hero.”
“Huh. Do you know how long she’s had this name for?”
“Hm. I do not believe that she had it previously, so I am assuming that she chose it herself sometime recently.”
“How’d you even learn what it was?”
“I asked, of course! It felt silly speaking to her and not knowing her name. Had she not had one, I would have given her a name myself.”
“Right. Well, I guess she’s Ilo now. Anyways, just go back above for now. I’ve got to talk to the last candidate, and then I’ll make a decision on who to use as my secretary.”
“The way that you said ‘to use’ makes me even more hopeful!”
That’s one potential secretary. Only one candidate is left now.
“I see,” Corwin says. “It does sound like an interesting and challenging position. I may also be biased because I do enjoy any time spent in King Cat’s company, and everybody else up there is rather friendly.”
“Yeah,” Fenrir says. “You’ve got good diplo potential in you.”
“Short for diplomacy.”
“Ah, so you are saying that I would make a good diplomat?”
“Basically. Plus you’re dependable, well-spoken, and pretty much everybody likes you. Especially Olly.”
“I think that Olly’s like for me would have to be placed on a higher level than most’s.”
“You’re not wrong about that. So, are you interested?”
“I suppose that I am! Ah, wait. Excuse me if this is an improper question to ask, but how many hours of service do you think you will require from me?”
“Can’t be separated from Olly for too long?”
Corwin smiles and scratches his cheek. “Am I that obvious?”
“Always. Anyways, go up above deck with Nell, and I’ll be out there in a minute.”
“Very well, Fenrir.”
With that, Fenrir is left alone below deck.
Out of five potential candidates – out of the only five people who don’t already have important jobs such as scouting, building, or strategizing, only two remain.
Nell and Corwin.
It went down pretty much exactly as Fenrir was figuring it would. He had some faith in Cassiel and Azalabulia, but he knew from the start that asking Serra would probably be a bad idea. After all, she’s the one who still gets flustered around any new people who can’t be immediately identified as fellow perverts.
“What jobs could I give them?” Fenrir thinks to himself, but gets replied to by his favorite tsundere-little-sister-puppy.
“Give them jobs that are like jobs!” Saya answers.
“Wow, so specific. Thanks, Pupaya.”
“I-it’s not Pupaya! Just Saya! You baka onii-wan!”
“I’ll call you Saya if you can answer this question for me.”
“Just remember I can’t tell you anything that would assist you in the game!”
“Yeah, yeah. So, if you hypothetically had to do a job here, what would you want to do that nobody else is doing?”
“Gathering… oh. Yeah, we have nobody really doing that. The only gathering we did was for stone and logs, and we’ve pretty much been living off of fish. I’m guessing gathering would also be useful for making potions that could help everybody out.”
“And you get to spend time in nature!”
“Yeah. Good answer, Saya.”
“Of course any answer I give is a good one!”
“Right. So, Pupaya.”
“Hey! You said you’d call me Saya!”
“And I did, but I didn’t say for how long.”
“You’re the worst.”
“I know. Anyways, thanks. The others can just go and gather whenever they’re not training so that they don’t feel like they have nothing to do, plus it’ll help us out.”
“Right! H-hey, wait. You totally asked me what I’d do so that you could use it for what they can do!”
“Yeah, but you already knew that.”
“Don’t you love loopholes?”
“You’re the worst, onii-wan.”
“I’m the worst, and now I have two secretaries.”