(1) Day 0: In Which I Wisely Choose the Direction of my Destiny
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Starting Status:

 

???: ?

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All I remember is this: snuggling my cat, playing Stardew Valley, and the time slipping by me as it usually does. I remember looking at the clock and seeing it was past 2 a.m. I don’t know exactly what happened next. Maybe I fell asleep and hit my head against the edge of my computer desk? If I did fall and sustain a head injury, it would be up to my cat to get help and make sure I didn’t bleed out to death on my bedroom carpet. Not a promising situation.

 

I woke up floating in space. I couldn’t feel much. When my eyes were open all I could see is black void. It was so empty and so featureless it felt like my eyes would fall out of my head if I kept looking. 

 

I must have floated for several minutes until finally something started to happen. Little pinpricks of light came on, one at a time, around me. More and more and more, until I felt like I was inside of a Christmas tree all aglow. What was going on? 

 

I looked closer and realized the lights were stars. I had never seen so many. And, unlike the dark of the night sky, the spaces between the stars were lighting up as well. The universe was painting itself in shades of violet, aqua and yellow. It was intensely beautiful. Finally, the show seemed to be reaching a climax. The stars directly in my line of sight began to glow, and lines appeared between them, making some kind of shape. Shapes, actually.

 

I looked around. The band of star-shapes went all the way around me in a ring, right at what I would call my face level. 

 

I didn’t actually have a face. When I realized this, I panicked, but since I had no lungs, I couldn’t hyperventilate, and I had no limbs, so I couldn’t throw my hands in the air, and scream and run around. I decided to focus on what was going on in front of me. Surely this was all a dream, although an incredibly realistic one.

 

I now noticed the star-shapes had some words underneath them. One of the shapes said Ladle, and looked a bit like Ursa Major. Another said Arrow (I’ll let you guess what that shape looked like). More and more, the words came out, corresponding to the star-shapes. WheelOctopusOakSnake

 

Something was itching in my mind. These star shapes-were they constellations? And if so-

 

I turned myself (whatever myself actually was, sans body) in a circle and counted the constellations. My suspicion was confirmed. There were twelve shapes. Twelve signs of the zodiac. This was some alternate zodiac, one which I had never heard of before. 

 

As soon as I made that mental leap, I heard a soft chime. 

 

The chime was accompanied with words, which now overlaid my vision. 

 

Select Your Birth Sign

 

Okay weird. Where did these words come from?

 

I started looking at the signs in detail. I found that if I prodded them with my mind, I could get more information about each sign.

 

I examined Ladle, once again..

 

Those born under the sign of the Ladle are sturdy and dependable.

 

Interesting. Was I a sturdy and dependable sort? I prodded the image of the Ladle-sign a little further.

 

Effect 1: All food has +15% base effect.

Effect 2: ???

Effect 3: ???

 

I was to pick a zodiac sign, it seems, based on the description, and the knowledge of only its first effect. 

 

I wasn’t sure about Ladle and thought I could find a better fit. I kept looking. 

 

The sign which attracted me immediately due to the curving tendrils of its constellation-shape was Octopus. It floated in a portion of the sky which was a lovely deep indigo.

 

Those born under the sign of the Octopus tend to have more than one arm.

 

Right, of course they did. And then, further details:

 

Effect 1: One extra customer every day, after day 3.

Effect 2: ???

Effect 3: ???

 

I was starting to get a feeling for this world based on the description in the Signs. There was going to be food (great!), and some kind of business (I wasn’t so hot about that one). The Octopus, attractive as the constellation was, didn’t quite capture my fancy.

 

I decided to spend some time thinking this over and looked up. There was another constellation there, directly above me, but much dimmer than the ones at eye level. I squinted.

 

Star

 

A constellation of stars, called Star? What will this strange universe throw at me next? I prodded the Star for further details, but my mind hit a block. I concentrated, and tried stabbing at it with mental focus.

 

A little noise, like hollow wood being hit with a drumstick, sounded as I tried.

 

Locked. This constellation is locked. Please select another.

 

If I wasn’t able to select it, why even have it there? Of course, now that I knew this was the one off-limits constellation, it was the only one I wanted. I tried to strengthen my mental resolve, and with all my will, puncture through the Locked screen. 

 

Tiny words, which I could barely make out, appeared under the Locked message.

 

To unlock, discover the Starchild’s real name.

 

I tried mentally shouting the only answer I could come up with. Ziggy!

 

It didn’t seem to do anything, and I was out of ideas. Even if I were to discover the name of this Starchild, how would I come here again? If I picked one of the other signs, would I be able to re-align myself with the Star, once it was unlocked?

 

I couldn’t do anything further with the Star so I decided to pick one of the lesser (as I considered them now) zodiac signs.

 

After reading each carefully, I felt most affinity for the sign of the Snake.

 

Those born under the sign of the Snake are tempting and seductive.

 

Effect 1: Romance other characters twice as easily.

Effect 2: ???

Effect 3: ???

 

When I read the description and effects, I felt a pang of loneliness. Had I ever had a romantic interest in my previous life? It was hard to recall any details of my life before this dream, but I did get a sense of a quiet, solitary life, longing for a relationship but never quite making it happen.

 

I decided I would need all the help I could get to avoid the same fate in this odd, new world, and if the Snake was going to help me with romance, I would gladly pick it.

 

Are you sure?

 

I paused. Feelings of inadequacy, of missing out on kisses, hugs, and caresses, feelings of never being wanted; they all washed over me. Yes, I was sure. I did not want to make the same mistakes that I made in real life. This time, everything would be different.

 

I mentally answered yes. The Snake constellation began to move, and I noticed that I was getting closer and closer to it. When I felt like I was right in the middle of all those beautiful stars, I saw something slithering at the edge of my vision. A slick, black serpent was circling around me, the scales so smooth they looked like liquid ink. It edged closer and closer, until it was all but wrapped around me. It lifted its head eye level to mine.

 

Snake

 

Effect 1: Romance is twice as easy.

Effect 2: Start game with Curse of the Unspecified

Effect 3: ???

 

As the words appeared, the serpent seemed to wink at me. Uh-oh, that second effect sounded like a debuff. Although I had no idea what this curse could be, I wasn’t pumped about starting the game with a negative effect. 

 

The snake coiled back, and opened its maw. I saw a pure void inside of the giant serpent’s mouth. Fast as lightning, it darted forward right at me, and then everything went black again.


Spoiler

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Ending Status

 

Sign: Snake

 

Buffs: Serpent’s Kiss (Romance twice as easy)

Debuffs: Curse of the Unspecified (???)

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