Book 5- Chapter XXXXI
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Cold wind blew across an ocean of soft white clouds as Morrigan stepped up to the edge. In every direction was sunshine and tranquility as her hair was gently tossed before her eyes making her reflexively brush it from her face. Below her feet was a mountain of unperceivable height, her bare toes flexing across the coarse stone.

The sight was magnificent, and she knew it was so; however the peace and tranquility did nothing for her. “Where am I?” she asked herself, looking across the sea of clouds for any clues. The last thing she remembered was being aboard the Malleus Die, the abominable dreadnought created by the Federation which had been twisted into the home of a being of pure destruction incarnate.

No, you are destruction incarnate, came a nostalgically familiar voice from behind her. However, when she turned she found no one there.

As if by silent request, a crimson light began to appear beside her until a less familiar yet equally welcome visage came to life right before her eyes.

“Apollyon?” She announced questioningly, her brows furrowing the slightest amount before looking down at her own hands. At the sight of her clean, white skinned fingers and palms, she realized something was different.

Well, I’m not Santa heh… I guess that’s not a thing anymore now is it? No, the whole idea of Santa was washed away with all the other pseudo-religious stuff a century before you were born, Apollyon noted calmly, the deity’s tone even and light-hearted.

“Am I dead?” she inquired with equal calm, looking towards the towering spectral form of her benefactor.

She watched closely as the lipless mouth shifted as Apollyon chuckled, noticing just how life-like the apparition truly was. It’s shoulders shifted and the hardened muscles in it’s torso tense as it laughed.

Not even close kiddo. No, you’re not dead, quite the contrary actually, Apollyon mused as it slowed lowered itself into a cross-legged position to be at her height. The sight should’ve been comical, that a ten foot near-demonic looking creature with spindly appendages could even sit cross-legged was an amusing idea; however, Morrigan found no humor in it, nor anything else, not even appreciation.

“Then…” Morrigan paused as she looked around at the endless scape before her, “Where am I? We?”

Apollyon shifted it’s gaze towards her, mindful of its elongated horns that wrapped around its head, Well, that’s not really the right question. The question should be, “Where are we now?” but I don’t have the answer to that.

Morrigan’s brow creased slightly at that yet she couldn’t find the energy or drive to be irritated by Apollyon’s response. Instead, she took a deep breath and took the refreshing air into her lungs. It was crisp, cold and carried so much and so little in a mysterious contradiction.

Grunting softly, Apollyon continued, Amazingly, you managed to take what should’ve been years of training and put it into practice. Last thing I remember is you dragging us through time and space to land face down on the bridge of your Lord Inquisitor. From there, well I assume we’re in the medical wing… then again, it could’ve been days, weeks or… hours ago.

Morrigan considered what the deity said, her thoughts briefly interrupted as the wings of a large bird crested the clouds in the distance only to disappear from sight. She knew where she was, or at least she had a good idea. Once upon a time she had experienced something similar though she couldn’t recall when, or why for that matter.

“This is a dream,” she stated flatly, lifting her hand out and swiping it to the side.

Before her the clouds removed themselves to reveal a lush temperate world below; forests and prairies that stretched to the horizon from her mountaintop view. The world below was gorgeous with a wide variety of life she could see from her position yet she couldn’t find anything recognizable about the world she stood on.

Mhm, Apollyon confirmed, unperturbed by the fact.

With that realization, Morrigan looked to Apollyon, who sat staring off in the distance, and asked, “ Why?”

Your body is… acclimating, for the lack of a better word. You did good, kid. Not only did you bring that little pipe dream of peace to fruition, but you also upheld your end of the bargain. My vengeance is complete and now… the next chapter begins. Apollyon responded, not even bothering to pause.

Morrigan shifted as the memory of killing Ruin flashed in her mind, the feeling of drawing in the remnant power of destruction through the blood of Apollyon’s daughter… how it felt, compared to how it used to feel.

Apollyon looked to see the slightest hint of confusion on her face and sighed near apologetically, Your body needs time to adjust to becoming the vessel of a god, at least however close to being a god you could become since you started off as a mortal… heh, who would’ve thought? But, Ruin is no longer and that only leaves you, now.

Her eyes darted to the deity, her whole body shifting to face it as she tried to feel something, anything except the null that seemed to grip her soul, “What about you? You can’t mean… I thought the point of killing her was to get you your power back?”

Apollyon shook its head slowly, its burning crimson eyes showing apology as it said, No. My body has long since died, and when we made our pact, I had to cut my connection to the cosmos… Apollyon looked down as if ashamed, It’s hard to explain, but two beings of power can’t inhabit a single body.

Frankly, I was lucky enough to survive. Nothing is free, creating life has its consequences and if I had been stupid enough to give Ruin any more of my essence she would’ve actually killed me whole fully… I’m not entirely immortal, I can be killed by beings such as I, much like any of my siblings, and she would’ve replaced me entirely. Now you hold that same power.

“Then… I’m the new you?” she asked.

Apollyon nodded, Near immortality and all. I’m simply Apollyon now. The power of destruction belongs to you, the new End of all things… no, not the end. Apollyon chuckled with mild levity, That was just a stupid moniker for a bunch of nameless beings. You named me though, I was once the end only to be called Apollyon, much like you now, the new End called Morrigan, goddess of death.

“I… I can’t be a goddess…” Morrigan said shaking her head, the void of emotion making the news come as close to painful as she could imagine, “I have a family, kids, I can’t be…”

That’s the consequence of taking a life. You experienced it in the beginning, the growth in power, in control but eventually your body siphoned off what I had left, and fed itself on the universe. Now that you killed the one who held the rest of the core essences of existence, your body is adjusting to suit your new position in the universe, Apollyon reiterated, making sure she understood what was to happen.

Morrigan’s mind would have reeled by the information yet, some how, she remained calm and collected. She knew she should feel every emotion that existed and yet she felt almost at peace, except it wasn’t peace, it was nothing at all. All she wanted was to scream, to rant and rave and take out every bit what should have been frustration out on Apollyon along with the rest of the world before her; she couldn’t though. She didn’t hold the will to muster the unending rage she knew she had.

Then again, it made a sort of sense to her, if her body was adjusting then perhaps her soul was too, catatonic and unable to feel for the time being until both her body and soul reoriented.

Now you’re getting it, Apollyon said in agreement, obviously still able to hear her thoughts.

The closest to emotion she could muster was a deep, even sigh, “What am I going to do?” She may not have been able to feel feelings, but she still felt mentally lost. She didn’t want to be a goddess, or deity, or anything of the sort. There was already issues of cults believing her to be some kind of goddess, if anyone found out… her peace that she fought so hard to create would fall to chaos.

There was a sense of warmth that flooded through her that calmed her static thoughts as Apollyon rested it’s massive clawed hand on her shoulder, The choice is yours. You’re the goddess of death now. Stay and rule over your people or submit to your new position, wherever you go, I’ll follow.

“Not that you have much choice,” she pointed out.

Eh, I mean, technically you could kill me and take what miniscule amount of my power I still have, you know, then  truly ascend into the new me and such, Apollyon stated jovially as it tenderly squeezed her shoulder in support.

She didn’t want to accept any of it, yet she knew she had no choice in that matter. She had spoken to Apollyon about cosmic law enough to know that everything that exists must end, and with Apollyon reduced to a ghost of its former self and with Ruin dead, it fell to her. Somehow she needed to figure out what she was to do about it.

Then again, she couldn’t do anything while in a coma. Instead, she reached up and wrapped her fingers around one of Apollyon’s claws. Despite what the deity had thrust upon her, it felt nice that Apollyon tried to comfort her. In it’s own weird way with being unable to feel, it managed to help.

◇◇◇

There was an annoying beep in Morrigan’s ears as she slowly came to consciousness; the steady beeping ever grating against her nerves as her eyes slowly opened. As the world came into focus Morrigan found herself surrounded by white walls, tile floors and a brisk breeze settling over her body. She groaned softly as she looked down to see the stark white gown she wore only to shift her gaze to see a wide variety of medical equipment surrounding her; most of which sat lifeless.

The rhythmic beeping drew her attention again, turning to see a monitor that showed four different lines drawn across it. One of those lines was jagged, constantly moving up and down while another jumped periodically before being followed by another beep. With a groan, she realized the device monitored her vital signs though she had no idea what any of the information meant.

She glanced down to see a single band around her wrist which wirelessly transferred her vitals to the monitor but what caught her attention was the lack of markings on her hand and arm.

That wasn’t just a dream…” she told herself as she curled her fingers slowly in observation before another beep interrupted her thoughts. In annoyance, she lifted her arm to switch the machine off only to find not only her arm, but her entire body was painfully stiff.

She sighed with relief though once the monitor was off and she let her body relax once more.

How are you feeling? Apollyon asked.

She didn’t know how to answer the question though. Morrigan considered her dream and speculated on how she felt during it; however, it made her realize that she didn’t know how she felt. The entire idea that she was a goddess only made her feel lost and uncertain and as she closed her eyes and sighed, she said, “Like I got run over by a tank.”

The comment made Apollyon chuckle, but the deity, or prior deity as it were, didn’t say anything in response. What she did know though was that she needed to get home, or at least that’s what she wanted.

With a pained groan she forced herself to sit up only to realize that within the walls of the room were large observation panes, dozens of medical staff milling about and that brought on worry.

Granted she was the Empress and no one would make her stay but because of her position she knew any doctor or nurse would be adamant about her staying. The health of royalty was an odd privilege that came with a bright spot light and focus. It was similar to when she was the Lord Inquisitor but Doctor Tamina had never been able to corner Morrigan and force her to be looked over, but now she was in a hospital filled with medical personnel that would have the same determination as the Archangel’s head doctor.

She had to steady herself as she stood up, her legs were so stiff that they refused to respond to her direction. With effort, she found the clothes she wore the day of the attack on the Malleus Die folded neatly in a cabinet near the corner of the room.

Though her body began to regain function as she moved, she had to be careful as she dressed herself. Regardless, she was thankful that her body was beginning to work properly, if she intended on sneaking out she would need her full mobility. The last thing she wanted was to get caught.

She leaned against the wall next to the nearest window and peered out to find dozens of doctors and nurses milling about focusing on everything but her room, which she found thankful though she knew she would have to find a way to draw less attention to herself, preferably a lab coat or something to help her blend in.

Shifting to the other side of the window she could see partially down the adjacent hall and found it clear. Opening the door, she dropped low and hid on the other side of the nurses' station as she listened to three nurses chat idly. Getting a clearer view of the hall, she moved silently and stalked down the hall looking for anything she could use to move more freely while keeping a look out for anyone who could find her sneaking away.

The hall remained devoid of staff and no one even appeared to notice her room's door had been opened, much less anyone moving from the direction she came from, however, she had no luck in finding anything useful as she moved deeper into the hospital.

After several minutes she realized what hospital she was in. It was the same hospital on the Void Star where she had given birth to her daughters, and after reading the directional signs at the corridor intersection she knew exactly where to go.

However, the moment she rounded the corner she came face to face with a doctor and a nurse walking up the hall who stared at a data-slate within their hand. She froze and the doctor passed her by as if she wasn’t there.

They can't see you, Apollyon noted factually,

Morrigan watched with wide eyes as the two disappeared around the corner, “Yeah, but why?

You're a goddess now, your subconscious doesn’t want you to be found and the cosmos is listening, Apollyon explained vaguely causing much of the stress of her situation to bleed away.

“Oh…” she muttered as she considered what that meant and decided that out of all of the stress the idea of being a goddess brought, that specifically was a useful perk.

With that in mind, Morrigan traced her way through the hospital until she found herself outside, and took deep breath of manufactured atmosphere giving herself a sense of ease and freedom; though she was free of the hospital, the next issue for her brought that stress back in full swing; explaining her new status to her family.

Morrigan stalked her way through the streets of the Void Star, watching people while taking care not to bump into the thin populace that milled about. It had been well past midnight on the hive world and most of the population had been asleep which certainly made things easier on her.

Being unseen, she found a peacefulness to a quiet hive world; being able to walk about without the attention her position brought. Before, she couldn’t step out of her estate without everyone staring or praising her attendance no matter how often she walked amongst her people.

The walk was peaceful though and gave her time to consider her situation before she found herself outside of her walled off estate, the massive thick steel doors that cut off the main street from her home barring her path. After gliding over the wall with the very same spectral wings she always had, she ever so quietly approached her massive home and cracked the front door open.

Her home was as silent as could be except for the soft yet rough breathing of Xol that echoed down from the upper floor. She stepped in and silently closed the door taking in the silence with a profound sense of contentment. Before she took a step though she began to sense something. It was familiar at first, an un-tempered anger that sat somewhere underneath the subconscious, but then there was more, a trio of echoed emotions that bore the faint tingle of worry contrasted by a sense of contentment and another wave of pride.

She knew exactly what it was, it was her family’s subconscious emotions but she had to close her eyes tightly and resist the urge to wince as that sense expanded into a cascade of innumerable emotions.

Your senses are awakening, Apollyon pointed out and it took Morrigan a long moment for her to steady her breathing.

Is this from everyone on the Void Star?” She asked in her mind as more and more emotions registered to her senses like beacons.

Yes, but no. You, my dear, are feeling everyone in existence, or at least, you will be. Don’t worry though, you’ll get used to it.

Morrigan shook her head as more and more emotions pressed upon her psyche and she made her way to the stairwell of her office, taking extra caution to tread lightly as she struggled to make her way down the stairs in hope that the secured room would somehow be a barrier to everything she felt.

She fell to her knees holding her head as the emotional broadcast stretched across not only the galaxy, but the universe. It wasn’t painful, but it was a bizarre and confusing sensation that threatened to cause the worst migraine she had ever known but after nearly a half an hour, when all she wished for was for it to end, the sensation cut off abruptly, as if something in her mind, or her body, snapped into place.

She breathed heavily as she let out a relieved breath all the while sagging onto the floor.

“That sucked,” she said between breaths only to hear Apollyon snicker at the comment. For some of reason she couldn’t help but chuckle as well. Maybe it was the absurdity of her life that finally caught up to her, or perhaps she was just exhausted but the only thing she could consider was that her life was no longer in her control.

Then she felt it, an overwhelming curiosity.

You felt that, didn’t you? Apollyon inquired, the ex-deity’s tone pensive. She did of course but she couldn’t begin to guess what it was; it was beyond stronger than anything she had ever felt and yet it held a distant familiarity that she couldn’t place.

“What is that?” she asked quietly as she got to her feet.

A problem better solved sooner than later… Apollyon paused with an irritable tone, It seems Ruin’s death has drawn the attention of my siblings, they must have felt it

Morrigan ground her teeth at having to deal with another problem before even getting the chance to sort out what was in front of her. “Why is that a problem?”

Well, they’ll realize Ruin’s essence is gone. Best case scenario one of them picks up the mantle and you get to live your days however you want… worst case, they design something worse than my daughter to replace her.

Morrigan’s eyes widened at that, “Okay, fair enough, so what, I just teleport to the wreckage and tell them I’m the new you?”

 She could feel Apollyon shake it’s head, Don’t get ahead of yourself, you got lucky the first time. You can fly through the galaxy though without fearing the void. You’re a goddess now, so the laws of physics don’t really apply to you… for the most part.

Morrigan wanted to scream as she became beyond frustrated. She didn’t want godhood, nor did she ever want to deal with anything she had to deal with as she was previously. She wasn’t a ruler or a leader. Never once in her life had she ever considered herself to be anything more than a miscreant and yet, she was forced into a position so far out of her depth that she some how managed to pull off only furthering her frustration.

“Fine, let’s get this over with so we can sort my damned life out,” she said gruffly as she made her way up the stairs, actively willing herself invisible and silent to those around her. To her surprise though, Skoll sat in the center of the atrium waiting for her.

She stared the massive beast down as it’s gaze pierced right through her.

He must have felt your presence, Apollyon noted.

She pointed upstairs and mouthed for him to go upstairs only to feel a rolling wave of defiance from the creature. Skoll’s eyes narrowed for a moment, as if he knew that he was disobeying her intentionally, before he sat on the ground and let out a nearly inaudible whine.

Morrigan held her hands up and approached him, silently shushing him only to be met with a low groan that threatened to turn into a growl. Morrigan stopped and peered towards the grand staircase to see Xol sleeping between both of her girls’ rooms before looking back to Skoll with narrowed eyes.

He was threatening her, that much she knew though the aura of longing he exuded was what caught her off guard. “He knows I’m leaving?” she asked herself in disbelief.

Makes sense, there is a special bond between you two. Whatever his species is, there’s an innate psionic link that they can create and that is why he can see you, or at least know where you are, Apollyon observed.

She closed her eyes and swore internally. Skoll threatened to wake the house up if she left but there was no way for her to console the beast. She knew very well that if Skoll had his mind made up on something, he was as obstinate as they could come; like a teenager in a fur body.

Considering her options, she realized that perhaps he wasn’t trying to keep her from leaving but instead demanding that she take him with. That posed another issue though. Per Apollyon, she could survive the vacuum of space but Skoll could not. Then, after a moment, it dawned on her that she had a small private starship at one of the docks off of the Void Star’s Alpha sector.

Letting out a silent sigh, she pet the overgrown canine and pushed his face away as he tried to lick her face. Instead of turning him away, she gestured for the door and was met with pure delight as Skoll bound to his feet.

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