“I wouldn’t mind turning into a dragon,” Gretchen said.

Seri nearly dropped her mutton leg. “What?”

They had been eating lunch, just the three of them. Brand was out shopping for blankets and warm clothes, as promised. Nel had been prattling excitedly about a lizard she’d just seen on a rock, and Seri was nodding and scraping the gravy off the mutton, when out of nowhere, Gretchen opened her mouth and uttered what had to be a mistake.

“It might be nice,” Gretchen said. “To fly above the clouds, to sit on a hill and eat sheep all day.”

“Oh, yes, it’s great fun,” Seri snapped. “To feel your bones twist and your insides burn and watch your hair fall out.”

Nel stared at Seri, her brow crinkled with concern, but Gretchen continued, unperturbed,

“I could withstand the pain. It wouldn’t last forever, and in the end, I’d be big and strong. I could go where I wanted. I could set fire to my enemies.”

“You wouldn’t know your enemies,” Seri said quietly. “You wouldn’t know yourself. You’d lose your memories and become a mindless beast.”

“I wouldn’t mind.”

“Brand would control you. You’d be his slave!”

“I wouldn’t mind,” Gretchen said again.

Seri didn’t know what to say. Gretchen’s face had relaxed into a placid, almost peaceful repose—but her eyes were glassy, staring vaguely into nothing. She’d been like this from the start. Seri kept hoping that with a little bit of time and patience, she’d get better. But she hadn’t. If anything, she seemed to grow worse.

Seri glanced at Nel.

“What sort of things do you like, Gretchen?” Nel asked.

“I don’t know,” Gretchen replied.

“You like to paint, don’t you?”

“Yes.”

“What else?” And when Gretchen didn’t reply, Nel said, “I have a sister who loves dancing more than anything. Most of the day, she’ll wander around as though in a daze, but every time we have a dance, she’ll whirl and jump and beam. You’ll never see a creature happier than her. There must be something like that for you. Something you love more than anything else in the world.”

After a pause, Gretchen said, “I like music.”

“What kind?” Seri asked.

“Any kind,” Gretchen said. Another pause. “Brand had a lute. That’s why I went with him. I thought he’d play it, but he didn’t.”

“I don’t think he knows how,” Seri said.

“He does,” Nel said. “He’s not very good, but…”

“Maybe we can persuade him to hire a minstrel,” Seri said. “Would you like that, Gretchen?”

She shrugged.

“Once Brand gets back from the market, I’ll ask him,” Seri said.

Seri noticed, out the corner of her eyes, Nel motioning her. She excused herself and walked with Nel into the hall, out of earshot. Nel was fiddling with her sleeves.

“Thank you, for comforting Gretchen,” Seri said.

Nel nodded. “I’ve felt that way, myself,” she said. “Like my soul had already left me, and I was hovering above it, watching my body move and speak.”

Seri felt a chill go through her. “You’ve felt that way?”

“Not here,” Nel said hastily. “Here, I’ve felt… I’m happy. But what I wanted to ask you was… do you think… do you think Brand will actually do it? Hire a minstrel?”

“Yes,” Seri said, a little surprised by the question. “Why wouldn’t he?”

“Well, a minstrel is expensive. And … and Brand doesn’t…. He doesn’t seem to like Gretchen much.”

“He likes her fine,” Seri said. “And whether he likes her or not, he brought her here. He’s responsible for her, and he’ll take care of her.”

Nel nodded. “I suppose you know him better than me.”

An odd feeling welled up in Seri… like doubt or dread. Nel should know what Brand was like by now. She should know he wasn’t negligent. After all, Nel was the one who saw the best in Brand, who brought it out of him.

Seri shook herself. “You love painting more than anything else?” she asked Nel.

“Except for my family, yes.”

“So, when you were in a bad place, painting made you feel… whole again?”

“No,” Nel said. “My sisters brought me back. But I did start drawing, and it helped.”

“Does Gretchen have any sisters” Seri wondered out loud. “Does she have anyone at home who could help her?”

“Even if she does, Brand won’t let her go home,” Nel said.

Seri tilted her head. “Brand always lets the girls go home.”

“After they give him something,” Nel said. “But if Gretchen wants to be a dragon—”

“It won’t come to that,” Seri said.

“It might,” Nel said softly.

“He won’t let Gretchen become a dragon,” Seri said.

“He’s letting you become one,” Nel pointed out. “And he likes you, Seri. But rules are rules, and his rules are the most important thing to him. He won’t break them for you, or Gretchen, or… or anybody.”

“Of course, he will,” Seri said. “He’s broken them before. The rules are nothing more than his way of exerting power and control. Why does he need to exert power over Gretchen? She’s not resisting him. He certainly doesn’t want anything from her.”

“So you think Brand will break Gretchen’s curse?”

“I think so,” Seri said. Then, after a beat, she added, “But he might be more willing, if you were to ask him.”

“Me?” Nel said with some surprise.

Seri nodded. “Brand won’t listen to me. I’ve tried, but every time, he digs in his heels and does the opposite of what I say.”

“Seri, if you can’t get him to listen, what chance do you think I have?” Nel said, incredulously.

“You have a different approach,” Seri said. “And he responds to you far more gently than he does to me. He’s never yelled at you or threatened you or even raised his voice.”

“No, but….”

“You’ve never defied him. He’s not defensive around you. So if it’s you saying it, maybe it will get through to him.”

“What will get through to him?” Nel asked quizzically.

“That he doesn’t have to do this anymore,” Seri said. “That deep down, he doesn’t even want it. What Brand wants is to get married and have a family and lead a… well, not exactly a normal life, but a better life. But he can’t have that if he keeps kidnapping girls and cursing them and robbing castles. He’s destroying his own future and hurting ours as well. He needs to stop.”

Nel paled. “You… you want me to tell him that?”

“Not in those exact words,” Seri said.

“I can’t say those things to him. He’ll be furious.”

“No, he won’t. It all depends on how you say it.”

“Seri, I can’t persuade him. I’m not like you. I’m timid and stupid—”

“You’re not stupid, Nel,” Seri said, gripping her by the arms. “You are smart. You were the one that decided the best strategy was to be nice to him—and it worked. You got through to Gretchen just now. You talk to Brand all the time, and it’s like the two of you are in your own world. You can do this, Nel. You’re the only one who can get through to him. Please, just try.”

Nel took a few shaky breaths.

“Okay,” she said quietly. “I’ll talk to him.”

Seri let go of Nel’s shoulders. She felt a swell of elation… followed by a nauseous churning in her stomach. Seri took a step back and shut her eyes.

“Are you all right?” Nel asked.

“Mm-hm,” Seri managed to say.

It might just be part of turning into a dragon. Burning in her stomach was common. So was nausea. But this feeling… it didn’t seem physical, not exactly. Rather, it felt like some small part of her was crying out in alarm.

“You’re in pain, too,” Nel said. “I’m so sorry. All this time, you’ve protected me, and I’ve never done anything to help you. You must be so scared.”

“No, that’s not why….” Seri said. “I’m not…. You don’t have to worry about me, Nel. It’s just… it’s Gretchen….  I’m just worried about her, that’s all.”

Her stomach knotted again, and now Seri was sure that it had nothing to do with turning into a dragon. It felt like… like she was lying.

Maybe she was. Maybe… maybe this whole thing… it wasn’t just about Gretchen. Seri was also in pain. The curse was getting to her. She wanted it to end.

Was that so awful? Was it wrong?

It was all connected: her, Gretchen, Nel, Brand—they could all be miserable, or they could all be happy. Why not be happy? It wasn’t like Seri was asking Nel to sleep with Brad or do something dangerous. It was just a conversation, one simple conversation.

What was wrong with that?