When I arrive at the elevator, I become painfully aware of the fact that I don't understand any of its many buttons. The symbols are..well..alien to me. Pushing the wrong one might just sound an alarm, and I definitely don't want to get in trouble on my first day on the job.

This is how the buttons look:

ᕲ  ᖽ
ᖶ  ᕵ
[   ᓰ
ᖶ  ᘺ
ᘜ  ᘉ

But lucky for me, the elevator door opens when someone gets out, and I manage to slip inside. 
There is enough room in here to easily fit ten people, but there is nobody else in here at the moment. So again I am stuck. What should I do now?

While I'm contemplating my next move, a panel begins to beep nervously to get my attention. It probably wants me to do something, but I have absolutely no idea how this thing works. 

"Crap! How do I get to the mess hall?" I say out loud in frustration and not expecting a reply.  

To my amazement, the elevator beeps and I feel movement. Did it really understand what I had said, or did someone else push a button? 

About fifteen seconds later, the doors open and I decide to leave the elevator. There is again nobody here, so how am I supposed to find out where the heck I am? 

"Now...where is the mess hall?" I said, hoping for a computer to guide me.

Then a voice replied, but it was no computer voice, "right that way, nurse" a man in uniform said, startling me. 

"Ah, thank you very much," I gave him a quick nod and a polite smile. 

"Think nothing of it." And the man had already disappeared into the long seemingly unending corridors of this maze they call a ship. 

Okay...they sure are polite here. Wait, did he say "nurse"? Then it dawned on me, of course! I am still wearing the medical uniform.

After walking down the corridor, I find doors that slide open gently when I approach them. In front of me is what I have been looking for, but this mess hall is huge, like really huge. Luckily for me only a handful of people are currently eating here, so I don't have to be embarrassed when I need to ask someone for help.

I decide to just go with the flow and if I should make a mistake, I will just say that I am new here, which is the truth anyway. I sit down at a table and take my time to look around while I try to blend in with my surroundings, observing the people here. How do these people get their food? There are only square....things... similar to vending machines around me, all of them are standing next to each other against the walls. Of course they all have symbols that I cannot possibly comprehend. Then I see a man walking to the front...ah...I see! There is also staff providing food, that will be my ticket to a full belly. 

At that moment my belly makes itself known, I haven't eaten in a very long time, yes I already knew that.
I follow his route and stand next in line. He orders something and a lady at the counter gives him his meal and suddenly he is already gone. I am next and still have no idea what to do. 

"How can I help you nurse," the lady asks with a warm smile. 

Think! Think! "Ah, yes, I have only arrived here today, and I would like to eat something, but I have an upset stomach. Could you maybe recommend something simple to me?"

"Of course, let's see....mmm. How about a Kelpie Surprise fruit salad?" 

"Yes, please, that sounds amazing, and maybe some water?"

"Water dispensers are over there. Just ask someone there to help you, dearie. Here is your salad, enjoy!"

"Thank you very much for your help. Where do I pay for this?" I ask, looking apologetic for my lack of knowledge.

"Ha ha ha, this must really be your first day, dearie, all is paid for you, so just enjoy."

"Sorry, thank you again!" I smile and walk to a table near the water dispenser as fast as I can.
I better get rid of this uniform soon, before people are asking me to provide medical care. I put the salad on the table and studied the water dispenser...nope...not understanding it all, and of course there is no one around to ask for help. Maybe......"cold water, please."

Klick...pscht..ping!

Great, now I can enjoy my...what time is it anyway......dinner, I guess? I carefully taste the fruit salad and it really is delicious, but in the end it is just another salad. The water tastes...normal, albeit a bit sweeter than I remember.  

After having finished my meal, I am left with another issue....how to get rid of this. Luckily I see someone walking to the water dispenser. He presses a button....eh that one. Got it.

"Eh, excuse me," I ask, looking really apologetic.

"Yes, how can I help you...eh...nurse?"

Again the nurse thing. "Sorry, I am new here today, where can I recycle these?"

"Ahaha, no need to worry, just put it on that tray and say the magic word...recycle." 

"Ah, thank you very much you are a lifesaver."

"No problem, bye," I caught him rolling his eyes.

Lucky for me, people in the mess hall don't usually insist on being addressed by rank, otherwise I would be in deep trouble now, because the whole rank thing is one big mystery to me. 

After recycling my leftovers, I was determined to find my quarters, which should be easy on a ship of this freaking magnitude. No, of course not. 

I wait outside the mess hall and decide to play the stupid new recruit routine again.

"Excuse me," I said.

"Yes....eh...nurse." 

Oh god, again? Every time they try to identify my rank, they come a bit closer to me, trying to read what isn't there at all. The doctor gave me a uniform, but without the rank insignia. People however still come closer and seem determined to try and identify my rank anyway.

"Sorry to bother you, but I am new on this ship. How do I find my quarters here?" 

"Hahah, did they pull a prank on you already? Don't worry, wave your hand in front of those terminals and tell them what you need. Just like most onboard systems, they are also voice activated. It is convenient for everyone, but was intended for people with limitations."

People like me. "Thank you very much!" I nod and smile, but then move away at lightspeed.

I stop in front of one of those terminals and say "soooo...how about you help me, dear terminal?"

"Command not recognized." 

Ooops. "Dear terminal, can you show me the way to my quarters?"

"Place your ID chip in front of the sensor."  

I wave my hand in front of everything that looks like a sensor until the thing beeps. 

"Identified...liaison-officer, Ayanna Vohali. BEEP. Follow the blinking lights to arrive at your destination."

"Thank you," I said.

BEEP

How rude...I guess it is not a real AI-system, even my smartphone was more polite than this thing.
I look around and see flashing blue lights at the end of the corridor, which I decide to follow. Surprisingly, the few people that I encountered didn't comment on my need to follow some very visible lights. 

 

After a brisk walk and another ride on the elevator, I arrived at my quarters. I waved my hand in front of a sensor and.....nothing.   BEEP.  No, it works, just a bit too slow for my taste.

On the way here I have carefully watched people interact with the ship's panels, so I am now at least able to open and close doors by pushing the correct button. The door closes gently behind me and I take the time to familiarize myself with my own private quarters. Well, they are small....like really small. Only room for a bed and a place to wash up. At least there seem to be no shared showers on the ship, which would make me feel really awkward.

After spending a minute to get acquainted here, I notice a soft beeping sound. I focus on the source of the beep, and....there it is. A small green light gently flashes, should be safe, right? I decide to push the button and suddenly an image appears in full screen showing a logo. Wow, that really startled me. 

Then a smiling woman appeared on the screen. "Ah officer Vohali, I tried to deliver your new uniform but you weren't in your quarters. Let me see...yes, I am on the same deck as you, so I can bring it along if you want."

"Oh yes, please if it is not too much to ask," I asked, being truly grateful for the delivery service.

"No problem, I will be there in a minute. Supply out." She gave me a warm smile before the transmission ended. 

Never hurts to smile, right? I will need to remember that. Wait..did she say "supply?" I don't think that is her name, so she must be a supply officer or something. 

BEEP.  My door beeps, so I quickly push the "open" button.

"Good afternoon! Here is your new uniform, officer Vohali," the supply officer said.

"Wow, that is fast! Thank you very much! Excellent service!"

"Haha, just say that to my boss," she laughed before she ran off to her next delivery.

Wow, those people really are polite here. And they smile a lot, that is contagious. Yeah...I can get used to these people. And now...finally some me-time. 

What time is it anyway? "Time," I said out loud after closing the door.

"The time is 1532 hours." 

Really? That must be right, if not for the fact that I have had dinner already. I hope it converts to my perception of time, just imagine if they had thirty-hour working days here. And something else that I have noticed, either everyone speaks fluent English, or they have a translator thing going on. Well, except for those damn buttons.

 

I decided to get rid of the nurse uniform and change into my new uniform.  
After locking my door, I walk into my tiny bathroom, which is essentially only a shower. I already learned the toilet functions, so I am good with those. 

I carefully get out of the nurse uniform as I want to return it. The nurse uniform is gray all over, except for two purple stripes on both shoulders. It looks more like glorified pajamas than a uniform, definitely not my taste.

After carefully folding the uniform and putting it aside, I take the time to observe my reflection in the mirror.

That is me....I am that. This is real, no dream. I see a young lady in ill-fitting underwear who stares at herself, she is cute, and everything is in the right proportions. I cannot prevent a blush from forming on my cheeks. I better focus on my way of speech and be a bit warmer to people, being too assertive won't do me any good.
I know that acting naturally will take some time, but I definitely like that challenge. 

 

After freshening up and putting on clean underwear that came with the uniform....only one set, yeah strange I know..., I put on my new uniform. Wow, this is surprising. This is much better than the nurse outfit, that one was too tight for me. And it looked more like pajamas too.

This one is different. It has a black below-the-knee skirt, and to my astonishment, a plain navy blue blouse with three bright red stripes on each shoulder. Navy blue....this just feels so familiar. And of course polished dress shoes with a little heel to show some style. I like it! I wonder, are military uniform designs perhaps a universal constant? Luckily there is no tie required in this organization. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind it, but I like to keep things simple. 

Then I see something on my blouse, on my left, just below my shoulder there are two golden buttons and something that looks like a nametag. 

Let's try something. "Computer?" 

BEEP

Ohhh. That works. 
"Can you perhaps translate this sign?" I pointed at it, trying to determine the intelligence of these systems. 

BEEP "rank insignia. red stripes: diplomatic division, two golden rank identifiers: liaison-officer; name tag: 

Ayanna Vohali."

That made me smile, more so than I had thought it would...I really like my new name.

 

Now that I look my best, I decide to go to the medical bay, while carrying my neatly folded nurses uniform.
While walking through the ship's long corridors, I observe that people are no longer smiling at me. Ahh, I get it, must be this uniform. But I don't want this special treatment, I want people to greet me. So operation smile has started.  

I was practicing my smile and greeted everyone that passed me by, they were quite friendly to me, so that is when I learned that I only needed to smile more.

The medi-bay doors slide open and I look around to find someone. 
"Where is everyone?" I said out loud.

BEEP. "Medical team is currently in a meeting. Do you need emergency help?" 

"No, I will wait for them." Oh god, imagine that I had accidentally said yes..!

I sat down on what I believed to be chairs for visitors and put the folded uniform on the chair next to mine. Then I closed my eyes for a minute. It was very quiet here and the sound of the air conditioning made me very, very sleepy.

 

"cer......officer...officer...are you alright?" 

I woke up, startled. "What? Where am I?" Massaging my neck which hurt due to a poor posture during my sleep.

"Easy there, I guess you fell asleep here, our meeting took longer than we expected. Do you want to have a glass of water?" A nurse said. A real nurse that is.

"Ah, yes please," I said.

I drank the water and then recycled it myself as I was now fully awake again.

"Thank you very much. Please forgive me for falling asleep here." I tried to look apologetic.

"Don't worry, you are not the first and definitely won't be the last," she smiled warmly, "now what can I do for you?"

"Well...I received my new uniform today, and I wanted to return your temporary nurse uniform. My little meeting with your medi-pod dissolved my previous clothing."

"Ahaha, yes, I see. But you can simply recycle them, those were spares, unmarked uniforms. It is another matter when you need to hand in your actual uniform. But I appreciate the gesture. I'm afraid you wasted your time here."

"No, not at all. Could I ask a silly question?"

"Sure, I like those the best! hahaha" the nurse said laughing.

I whispered "where can I order new underwear, I only have the pair that I received today."

She shouted "Your underwear? Hahaha!" 

Oh god, I was so embarrassed, my face became so red that I had to put my hands in front of my face. 

"Ah, sorry dear, your quarters will provide them for you. Just ask for them and recycle the old ones.
But uniforms are the only exception to prevent abuse. There is a cleaning system installed in your quarters, it is designed for your uniform, but will actually clean anything. So if you want to wear civilian clothing now and then, that would also be possible."

"Perfect! See! I didn't waste my time here at all. Thank you!" I smiled.

"Alright bye!" the nurse waved goodbye and returned to her duties.

I left the medi-bay and walked to the nearest recycler, as I now finally know the difference between a water dispenser and a recycling machine, and threw in the nurse uniform.

I said "recycle!", and then enjoyed a very satisfactory...BEEP!

 

The rest of the day was used to familiarize myself with the computer in my quarters. I learned how to get fresh underwear and pajamas as well. 

There will be lots to do and learn tomorrow. But just before falling asleep that night, my final thought was.."Why did they give me a set of underwear with the uniform when I can ask for it from my quarters..?".......zzzzzzzz