The garden was nowhere near as overgrown as I was expecting it to be. It still wasn’t as well kept as when mom was taking care of it, but it was under control. I was really surprised at the state of the place. Eight years is a long time for a house to remain unoccupied, but it looked taken care of, no sign of age whatsoever. I hesitated on the doorstep, looking down at the keys I held so tightly. As if they could disappear any second. As if this was just another dream. But if it was one, I didn’t want to wake from it. I took a deep breath and unlocked the door.

The inside followed the trend of the outside. It wasn’t dusty like I expected it to be. As I walked across the threshold, I turned to the living room, seeing the furniture covered in sheets. The window blinds closed, the curtains drawn. I closed the door behind me, and cautiously went in. The floor creaked ever so slightly as I walked through the hall. It took me about two minutes to find the remote for the blinds, and to my surprise the batteries in it were still charged, the blinds swiftly rising to let sunlight in. There were many cabinets here, full of trinkets and memorabilia. I can guarantee the nostalgia from seeing all of those hit me hard. The memories of staying over at my grandmas’ house, laying on a pile of blankets and pillows on the floor, as we watched old shows and movies.

I made my way to the fireplace. The last picture I ever took with mom sat atop it. Ten year old me, with long hair, holding tightly onto mom as we stood in front of the big tree in the backyard. She fell ill two weeks later. I picked the framed photo up, wiping it clean, before I wiped my tears away. I knew most trans people scoffed at old pictures of themselves, wanted them burned and destroyed. But not me. Not from that time. In all the framed pictures I could see in the house, I could be read as a young girl. Maybe a tomboy, but still a girl. And most importantly, mom was in them too. I opened the cabinet nearest to me, knowing full well an entire album sat within. With it in hand, I moved to the couch, pulling off the sheet in one swift motion before sitting down. The first picture was of course mom holding me in her arms. She looked so proud, even if she looked like a mess from the delivery, she looked so full of happiness and pride and joy while she held newborn me in her arms. There was a caption below it. ‘You hurt like hell to bring into this world, but seeing you grow made it all worth it.’ It was dated two weeks before her passing. 

All the pictures were like that. Each one captioned and dated shortly before she passed. Each one a message, wishing me well, reminding me to be kind and gentle, to not take shit. Quick anecdotes related to each picture. Her final words to me. I never got to say goodbye, but through the album I held in my hand, she did. I closed it, gently set it down on the coffee table, and got up. There wasn’t much to check in the kitchen. The dining room was well kept just as the rest of the house. A quick peek in the basement let me know that all of my grandmas’ stuff was stored properly and safely. A flight of creaky stairs took me to the upper floor, and hesitantly I walked towards a door. A door with a kitten sticker on it, my deadname written there. The good news is, it wasn't written with a permanent marker, and the sticker was effectively a whiteboard. A quick swipe later, the name was gone, and with the marker hung nearby, I wrote my name there instead. Like it should have been eight years ago. Like it could have been eight years ago. 

I pushed the door open. The room was exactly as I remembered it. My army of plushies on my bed. The wall paint looking like a forest full of pokemon. My desk, completely covered in loose papers, scribbles from back then. I approached it and took one from the top of the stack, and snorted. Miss Hellfire. I really had no right to give Leonard shit for his wolfboy fursona. 

Sitting down on the bed, I pulled a bunch of my plushies into a hug, laying down quickly right afterwards. With a sigh and a smile, I said the one thing I felt was appropriate to say at that moment. 

“Mom. I’m home.”

Katie-the-Angel-Witch

Well. This is it. I did it. After almost a year of writing and posting weekly, I finished. Deviled Egg has reached a complete state. The story has a beginning, end and middle, when read together it flows and follows and is understandable and makes sense. I can say I definitely cried writing this epilogue. 

I'd like to thank Natalie aka Mithril-Mercenary for her original concept and attempt at writing this story, both providing inspiration and direction in the early chapters that I took and wrangled into a readable, enjoyable state. 

I'd also like to thank Becca aka SaffronDragon, my wonderful girlfriend, who read through my nonsense and brightened my day with her comments as a beta reader. As well as for kicking my ass into high gear with the fight scenes against Saul and Khazmiel. Without her those would be nowhere near as fun or cool or impactful as they are now. Please, go read her story Swords of Selene, it is an excellent tale of steampunky adventures in a world populated solely by women, where a trans girl egg finds herself transported. I can highly recommend it.

Further thanks go to Félicie aka Taxouck, my other girlfriend and beta reader, for being there for me and letting me move in with her, taking care of me these past three months, and also beta reading the chapters, up to a certain point. The story is all the better for her input. I do suggest you read her stories as well, although chances are if you're a fan of Deviled Egg you've already done so.

I'd also like to thank JoJo aka Josephine_Sheepfemby, for being there for me as a partner even if trauma prevents them from reading this story. 

And, of course, I'd like to thank all of you readers, who've kept up with the story, left comments, joined the discord server, and interacted with me.

Now you might be wondering: What's next? Well, I'll tell you what's next. What's next is me taking a break from posting full stories for a hot minute, as I work on stuff. I have the full intention of going back, editing Deviled Egg, expanding on it in the chapters themselves but also with some extra chapters. And once that's done? It'll get published, with the subtitle Gourmet Deviled Egg, to denote it as an expansion. I'll make it available on itch.io and amazon for purchase. Including physical copies. 

But until then? If you want to keep me going, show your support in the meantime, and get access to one shots and such, along with any new long term project, you can support me on Patreon, which is https://www.patreon.com/SynTheGuardian

Three bucks a month is like one coffee, or a bag of chips, and you'd be directly supporting an author that outright cannot work because capitalism is bullshit and the places I could work at don't want to hire me. 

There's also a server for you to talk with me! https://discord.gg/VDVMVrc

Edit: I've had a gofundme to help me clear my debts since November 28th 2019, so if you're able to help I'd really appreciate it https://www.gofundme.com/f/disabled-trans-woman-needs-to-clear-debts