Fade into tremors, and the sky literally splitting open like a seam, revealing the inside of a room. Cut to the Reds looking up from below.

"Double Rainbow what is that!?" Sarge yells.

"It's some kind of crack, the atmosphere must be breaking apart!" Simmons explains.

"Repent! Repent! The end is here!" Donut yells.

"I still have so much left to do!" Ash yells. "Like write a book and paint a nice painting!" 

"Welp, I'll be in my bunk, I'm gonna catch some Z's, see you, guys." Grif walks off.

"You're choosing to die while taking a nap." Simmons says.

"It's how I lived, Simmons, it's how I lived."

"Ya know?" Sarge starts. "In some weird way, I actually respect that. Adios, dirt bag."

More tremors, and the sky splits open further. Cut to Tex and Church at Blue base.

Tex: I guess this is it.

Church: Hey Tex, there's something I need to tell you. I think it's important that I say this.

Tex: Wait a second. Look, I can take the whole 'at peace with the world' thing, and I can even stomach all the 'accept your fate' stuff. But... just do me a favor, okay? Don't say goodbye. I hate goodbyes. I mean, we are space warriors, right? We should try to maintain some level of credibility.

As Tex is talking, the camera zooms in on Church

Church: No, no, no, Tex, no. I think I just figured out what the Director couldn't. And Alpha either. It was you, Tex, all along. See I thought- I thought we, made you. The Director, and the fragments... but that's not the case. You made us. When the Alpha was created, you just kinda came along for the ride. You gave the Director the idea that he could make something more. That he could split the Alpha up. Don't you get it? You were the memory. You were the key. You were so strong, you made a whole other person. God - he always wanted to find you. You know, to get you right. To just see you one last time. And he wanted me to be able to do the same. To find you in here or... just, go down another iteration. Figure out this little Tex problem. Figure out how to do it right. But now I know. I know how to fix all o' this. How to end it once and for all. It was so simple all along. I just had to tell you three words. Three words I wasn't capable of telling you before.

Tex: (off screen) Oh, okay, wait a minute... are you gonna say "I love you?"

Church: No Tex, no, I'm not gonna say I love you. ...I'm gonna say I forget you.

There's a tremor, and the camera pulls back so we can see that Church is now alone on top of the base

Church: I forget you. I'm letting you go. ...Okay world, do your fucking worst! 'Cause I sure as hell just did mine.

All of a sudden, a voice from the void, full of echo as if answering his request.

Real world Caboose: (off screen) It's opening! It's working!

Church: What the fuck was that?

Cut to a view of the sky, and giant, real world Caboose is looking down through the crack

Real world Caboose: U- I see him! I see him, he's in there. He's okay!

Cut to the Reds

Sarge: Is that Caboose?

Simmons: Is Caboose... God? I mean, I can kinda see it now that I think about it. Sure would explain the fuck outta the platypus.

"I pray to the god known as Caboose!" Ash yells. "Please, grant me unlimited weapons and bombs!"

Sarge: Well, that's just great. Caboose is God. I guess that makes me the first person in the history of the Universe that doesn't wanna go to Heaven. Hhgh, great job Blue Team. You find a way to make everything suck.

Cut back to the sky, and giant, real world Sarge is shoving giant Caboose out of the way

Real world Sarge: What? Let me see, moron. It's just a bunch o' circuits.

Real world Caboose: Yeah but they're glowing. He's alive!

Back down to the mini-world Reds

Simmons: Um, Sarge? What're you doing up there?

"Who do I pray to now?" Ash asks

Sarge: What? Is that me? And more importantly, why am I talking with a Blue? Attention enormous version of myself! I order you to attack!

Cut to Church

Church: No. NO! The memory unit isn't dying! This isn't the end of the world - it's a fucking rescue mission. NO!

Cut to real world Sarge

Real world Sarge: Well get him outta there.

And to Church

Church: No, no, stop! Stop it, leave me here!

Church vanishes from inside the memory unit, and we cut to the Freelancer back story, with Carolina looking at the leaderboard.

1. Tex
2. Carolina
3. Minnesota

Director: Our next phase is ready to begin, Carolina. We will be asking you to do a great, many things.

Carolina: I'm ready Sir.

Director: Some of these things might be... questionable.

Carolina: I'll do whatever it takes. You've given me everything. I would do anything for you.

Fade back to the present day, in a room where real world Caboose and Sarge were in, standing over the memory unit, as ghost Church fades into being

Church: No, no, dammit! Whyhyhy? Why did you do it?

Caboose: Church, you're alive! See-I knew it. See I told them! And she was right! We could get you out!

Sarge: Alright then, we're square Blue. We helped you get your shiny blue buddy out, so that makes us-

Church: What're you doing here?

Caboose: U- saving you. Y-we found you in the place where they were keeping you and we traveled a really really long way to come to this place, and fought a bunch of people, and then fought a bunch of more people, and then we got you and took you and saved you, the end.

Church: But why would you do that? Why!?

Sarge: Well, clearly it wasn't to hear 'thank you'.

Grif: (off screen) Hey, we're taking fire out here!

Church: Thank you...!? You fucked everything up...! I was at peace - I had it figured out, it was over! Put me back!

Sarge: Put you back? Buddy, we just fought through an entire military base to reach you. And now you wanna go back?

Church: YES!

Caboose: She said we need you. She was the one who knew how to get you out.

Church: She? Who're you- who're you talking about, Tex? The real Tex?

Caboose: Tex? No, no not Tex. The new lady.

Church: New lady?

A door slides open, with Carolina entering the scene.

Carolina: Hey there, Alpha. Been looking for you for a long time.

Church: Oh no.

Carolina: Now that I've found you, you're gonna help me do what I should have done years ago: you're gonna help me kill the Director.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(I hope you guys liked Minnesota.)

07-18-2022