Chapter 12 – And now, I dream again
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I was flying in the skies with Rose, we were both on top of my broom, away from that dreaded tower. She told me a joke, I laughed and kissed her, she kissed me back and asked me to go to her private chambers to do more than kissing, I was embarrassed, but went there anyways.

I opened its door and found her with a man, enjoying each other’s body, he was having his way with her the same way she had it with me… But she proclaimed her love for him, her love for her fiancé, how she wanted nothing more than to be with him.

I ran, I ran and tripped on the ground, the laughter echoed through the courtyard, I looked around for help, but none offered a hand… Somebody save me…

Iris landed on my shoulder and told me it would be okay, that she was here for me… I tried grasping her hand, but she disappeared in a flash of light… Come back, please… I need you… I need you above all else.

“I was just playing around” Rose said, “a woman is not meant to marry another, much less a noble marry a commoner like you. I thought you had known better.” She said before turning around and disappearing into the fog.

I tried running after her, but Iris stopped me, she said I shouldn’t chase after those wild dreams… That she was here for me, that she would not betray me and that she genuinely cared for me… I kissed her, she flew away… Her face was pale, she was scared, why is Iris scared? “I can’t love you, Aria… Don’t do this again, we just don’t match… We can’t match, I’m not human, I’m not Rose, don’t try to make me her substitute.”

I shouted my love for her, that I was a fool for falling for that woman’s seduction when there was someone I loved much more all along, that I wanted her with me forever… She blushed, it was all I needed… I kissed her again, her tiny lips could barely touch mine, but it was the best kiss I have ever had… And then she got away, she was blushing extremely heavily, she couldn’t look in my eyes… “Aria… The next time you do this… It will be the last you ever see me.”

She disappeared into light again, the shadows of the tower grew larger, it was scary… It was too scary, I have to go there? There without Iris? To see Rose again?

I flew away, I flew away with Iris, I flew through meadows with the laughter following behind me… Shut up shut up shut up! You’re all gone! You’re not a part of me anymore! Just go away!

Her voice echoed, “A commoner like you. I thought you had known better.” Just get away from me! “A woman is not meant to marry another.” Who cares about that!? I love Iris!

Iris then said, “We can’t match, I’m not human.” My broom hit the ground and I flew from it and fell in the courtyard, everyone was laughing at me… Help me… Save me… Please…

The silver coins fell, mom looked away and the man seized me, I was put in the carriage, the carriage that rode towards that tall and scary building, the laughter was coming from that tower, let me go, let me go back… Mom! Mom!!!

“I can’t love you, Aria.” Iris’ voice echoed from within mom’s mouth… I cried, I cried as the darkness fell over the horizon.

 

The morning sunlight hit my face, I looked around and I was back at the inn, far from home, far from that cursed tower… It was just another nightmare… I’m alright now… “Morning, Iris.”

No response… Where is she? Did she go sunbathe this early?

I got up to look for Iris, when I realized I didn’t even undress before sleeping… How weird, why did I…? Oh… Of course… I did it because Iris is gone, and I had no peace of mind to think about what I was doing… It’s still morning though? But it was morning when I slept… Did I sleep an entire day? Seems likely.

No wonder that nightmare seemed never-ending, Iris wasn’t here to wake me up midway… But I only need to endure two more days, just two more days and a week should have passed since the last summon, I can do it, I can do it, I can survive two days in order to see her again… I can do it somehow. Have faith in yourself, Aria.

I left my room to have breakfast and Shaina commented on how disheveled my hair looked… I forgot to comb it? I guess I’ll do it after bathing…

After eating, I went back to my room to bathe… Oh, right, I need to get water from the well. I left again, went to the well, grabbed the water, put it on a basket and carried it to my inn’s room, then I entered in it and felt really uncomfortable… Did I forget to undress? I totally did…

I undressed, put my clothes to dry on the floor, bathed, used a rag to dry myself, then was about to get out… I’m really out of it today.

I put on some clothes and finally went to the guild, judging by how high the sun is, it must already be noon… I took longer than I thought to get this done… Whatever, it just means I’m half a day closer to meeting Iris again.

Since I didn’t have to save mana anymore, I flew on my broom towards the guild, instead of walking like I usually did. It was nice to be in the air again, I wonder if Iris always feels this freedom when she flies… I miss her.

When I reached the guild’s building, I considered dropping of the broom and entering through the door, but that was too much work, so I just got in through the opened window. Thalia was startled and made a funny surprised face… I laughed at her.

… Which was a bad idea that gave me a scolding, though I didn’t pay much attention to it. At some point she realized there was no meaning in continuing this, so she took me to a person that was put to sleep by the relic’s power.

Thalia guided me to a middle-sized house that she had the key to, and then led me to a room with a man sleeping on it… He was an elf and resembled her quite a bit… I assume they’re relatives.

I didn’t waste time asking the details however, there was no point in that, I just needed to work in order to distract myself… Though talking to her would also be a good distraction… Well, she wouldn’t want to talk to someone as pathetic as me anyways, so it’s better to stay silent.

I finished making a magic circle surrounding the bed by using a bunch of twigs from the nearby trees… It was certainly a lot easier to make glyphs with ink like I did back in the castle, but the twigs should work fine. And they’re a lot cheaper, which is very important.

After instructing Thalia to not open the window, not touch me nor the twigs nor the sleeping man until I told her it was okay to, I put my hand on his chest and used his body as a conductor to make my mana reach the magic circle… And then, my consciousness faded.

 

I woke up in the middle of a forest this time, before I had the opportunity to move around though, I heard that usual annoying voice in my head, “You’re back, did you come to accept my help?” No, thank you… Though I appreciate you went straight to business instead of trying to uselessly lure me again… Where is the sleeping man, anyways?

The relic didn’t reply in my head this time, I wonder if it can’t read my mind if I’m not holding its shard. Or maybe it just felt no reason to reply… Regardless, let’s try finding Thalia’s relative for now, I should find a way to get him out of this.

Oh wait, I was supposed to fix this whole mess, right? Not just rescue him… Whatever, I’ll figure it out as I go. The more time I waste, the closer I get to meeting Iris again, anyways.

As I walked aimlessly to try finding the man in question, the crystal spoke in mind again, “So she left, abandoned you, just like you feared.” So it still can read my mind after all… Such a pain, maybe it’s because I’m within the dream it induced in the first place.

And she didn’t abandon me, I was the one that was too weak to maintain her here any longer… I bet any of the other heroes would have been able to keep Iris here for weeks if they were the ones doing the summoning… “You don’t need to be so harsh on yourself” Yeah yeah yeah, I get what you want, comfort me, offer yourself as an ally, lure me in and then suck my life dry, no thanks.

And no reply again? Great, I like when my mind is my own… Now where is that man…?

I didn’t need to walk for too long before finding… Him? I wasn’t sure, I saw two children running through the forest, a boy and a girl. Both of them looked remarkably similar to Thalia and the man whose dream I’m in, and they called each other brother and sister, so… It seems like this might be it, must be a dream of when he was still a child… Either that or those are his children, though I guess Thalia would have told me if he had any… Or maybe not, it was not something I really needed to know.

They were my best bet for now though, so I followed the children, “Why do you wish to ruin his dream?” Oh, the voice is back, great… “This is what he wished for, it is his safe haven, what do you gain from destroying it?” I don’t know… Saving his life, maybe? I think that’s a good enough reason to do something about it, “Is a life of suffering truly worth living?” So you’re saying he is better off dying by your hands than living in the material plane?

Oh, no reply again, of course not. Let’s get this over with.

I approached the running children and asked the girl, “Excuse me, are you Thalia?” She nodded, good, that’s enough confirmation for me that the boy is the man I’m seeking.

I then turned towards the boy, “And you, are her brother, right?” He nodded, “I wanted to ask, did you pick up any shiny red crystal recently?”

He took a step back, he seemed scared… Will he jump at me wildly if I push him any further? Doesn’t seem that unlikely when considering what the counselor did… “Stop, you’ll destroy everything!” The voice shouted in my head… Let’s pretend it doesn’t exist.

“Look, you remember how you got this crystal, don’t you?” I asked him. The surroundings started to melt.

He took some moments to think about it, it seems like he was having a hard time remembering, until he eventually asked apprehensively, “Who are you…?”

 “Don’t you realize you’ll only make things worse if you interfere?” The voice annoyed me again. Could you please shut up? I don’t need a voice speaking in my head when I’m trying to make him give up on this dream by himself. You have no right to keep him here if he himself wants to leave, alright? So let me do my thing and just look from wherever you are.

Oh? No more replies? Thank you… Now where were we… Oh, right, I was talking to this boy that now appears to think I’m a crazy lady because I kept still while looking at nothing after he asked who I was. “I’m a friend of your sister, you know, the one that melted just now.” I answered him.

He looked confused, he looked around and seemed to finally realize that the surroundings were barely resembling a forest anymore. “What’s happening!?” He asked.

“This dream is crumbling, because you’re realizing it isn’t real.” I answered. “Just like how you aren’t a child anymore.”

“I’m… Not?” The man asked. I nodded, “Ugh… My head hurts…”

Seems like his memory is fuzzy, so… I’ll stir it up a bit, “Let me try fixing that for you, you were going through some troublesome situation in your daily life, I don’t know the details, but I would bet that your family relationship was falling apart. You were troubled and wished things were simpler, back to when you were still a child and close to your sister… And then a giant magical shiny crystal just happened to start appearing in your dreams while promising you that it could make everything better again… Did I get it right?”

His eyes seemed to have recovered some lost light, he blinked a few times and answered, “Roughly…”

“Good, then here is some new piece of info for you. Your sister hired me to go into your dreams that were overtaken by this crazy life-draining giant crystal in order to save you and bring you back to life.” Not quite true, but I bet that was her intention, “So you now have two options. You either go back to the material plane and try to fix your family relationship with your sister that is dying of worry for you, or… You keep living this dream as a child until the day you run out of life force and die… Which must be like… One week from now or something, I dunno.

“So… What will you do?” Please be smart enough to go back. Differently from me, you actually have someone waiting for you out there.

He didn’t ponder for long, “How do I go back?” He asked.

“Just give me your crystal shard and you should wake up in no time. Or at least that’s what happened the last time I entered one of these dreams.” I explained.

He nodded and took the shard out of his pocket and put it in my hand. The surroundings started to fade and he disappeared right in front of me, I guess this means he woke up… Now how do I get out of here?

“You don’t.” Oh, the annoying voice is back, and you also did the wonderful job of painting the surroundings pitch black again, just like you, do you enjoy this bleak surrounding? Fits right in with your inexistent heart.

“I don’t think you understand your situation.” Oh, I perfectly understand, I just need to break your connection to this shard again and I get out, right? So I don’t really need to worry about anything. “No, that’s not what I’m talking about.” Then what? You want me to give my life force to you to be rewarded with lovely fake dreams of Iris kissing me all day? I’d rather not.

“Would you really?” Now that’s a mean question for someone right inside my mind… Okay, sure, I’d love to have lovey dovey time with Iris all day, but I’d rather have the real one with me, so stop being a bother, “But you don’t have the real one.” You… Stop that…

“I’m not doing anything, you are the one that started crying.” You don’t hold back at all, do you…? “I only reflect you deepest desires, you know what you want.”

… Just why is a relic of the goddess of sacrifices doing with this kind of sneaky manipulation…? Just what are you trying to do anyways? “A sacrifice of your own life in exchange for the realization of your dreams, is that not a worthy exchange?” Oh, so that’s where you’re coming from… At least you’re honest.

“It is a small price to pay, isn’t it?” I do know my life is worthless, but a few days with a fake Iris are not worth even my own worthless life, alright? “I never said they would only be a few days.”

They… Won’t? “You experienced it before, time is relative in the dream realm, what might be only a few days outside, might be years, decades or even centuries inside here.” That’s a lot of time… “A lot of time with the one you love…” But she is not real… “But she will love you.”

… Do you really think this is a worthwhile trade? “What do you have to lose?” A worthless life, no meaningful relationships to speak of aside from… Iris. I’d lose her. “Does she really care that much for you?” Now, don’t get me angry… “But she pushed you away, didn’t she? Asking you to search for someone else.” She was… Just wanting the best for me…

“And isn’t this the best for you?” I’m not sure… “Isn’t a fake Iris also someone else? You would be fulfilling your promise to her.”

… How can I be sure you’ll keep your word? “Did any of the people you see in this plane look unhappy?” No… “Then what are you waiting for?” I just… Am unsure if that would truly make Iris happy.

“If dedicating your entire life for her wouldn’t make her happy, than what would?”

… Fine.

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