“WHAT BLASPHEMY IS THIS?” - asked the father of a queer child.

It was three years ago when a seemingly straight boy had finally figured out that he was neither straight nor cis. For now he labelled himself queer and said that he was questioning both his gender and sexuality.

What was his gender? What was his sexuality? What way did he want to present himself? He asked again and again but was only confused more and more. However, one thing he relied upon was his father. A seemingly straight man who had Queer friends and supported all of them. A cis man who went to pride parades and advocated for equality. So he knew that his father would support him, yet he did not tell his father. Why? Because he wanted to know more about himself. Because he wanted to be able to figure out himself before coming out.

So, he tried it all. He tried figuring it out. He tried experimenting with his gender, his pronouns, his clothes, his romantic interests and his sexual attractions. The things that he was able to figure out was this:

• He liked to appear feminine.

• He was comfortable with He/Him pronouns (masculine pronouns).

• He was attracted both sexually and romantically to most genders (but not all).

• He was neither bi nor pan.

• He liked the label Queer for it implied development and mystery in his own gender and sexuality.

So, he answered some questions which he wanted to know about. And three years later he finally was going to come out to his single father.

His father, Roy, had overcome a lot of societal expectations and challenges in raising his only son, Alex. Alex’s mother had said that she was neither willing nor able to become a parent, and so she had given Roy all the custody. While no legal proceedings took place, there were times when Alex himself questioned about the whereabouts of his mother. As Alex became a teenager, both Roy and Amy, Alex’s mother, decided that it was time to be honest with Alex and for Amy to meet her child.

For a few years, till Alex was fifteen, Alex had not been very willing participant for Amy because he could not understand how a mother could abandon her child. But on his fifteen birthday, he had finally understood the difficulties that parenthood comes with, along with the financial strains. And the relationship between Amy and Alex became similar, or rather better, to any other relationship.

Today, on the 17^th of August, a day after Alex’s twenty-second birthday, he was going to come out to his father. He knew his father would accept him and love him no matter what. The only question in his mind was how best to phrase his coming out. For the week following his birthday, Alex had written a letter again and again and again, until he was satisfied that it was good enough.

So he sat, with his father on the bed and him on the couch, facing each other. He took out the letter, opened it and started reading it. But as soon as the moment came where he was to finally reveal it, his mouth suddenly was struck with five seconds of anxiety. He started stuttering along his breath, however could not be loud enough to be heard. Finally he overcame it and said the words, “Dad, I am Queer.” Those were the last line of his letter and he had decided that he would explain his queerness to his father, later on when they both weren’t so emotional. He had expected a hug or even the words, “I love You no matter what.” However, what he did not expect was what came next.

“WHAT BLASPHEMY IS THIS?” - Roy shouted so loudly that tears started forming in Alex’s eyes.

“………………” - Alex could neither think nor say anything because of the shock. Roy had never been angry so much, neither had he ever yelled at Alex so loudly.

Roy with a furious face, and Alex nearly in tears, were silent for a minute, before Roy spoke again.

“I had never thought that this would actually happen to me. I supported all those blasphemous idiots because I knew about how hard and difficult their lives were, but now I understand the pain of their fathers. To see their child become a ******. It is the most horrible thing in the world. Truly there is no god, for if there had been one, I would definitely not be suffering through all this.” Roy spoke under his breath, just loudly enough to be heard by Alex.

After hearing those words, Alex could not stop his cries from overwhelming him.

“Truly a disgrace to the family you are. Crying like a girl now? That is what happens when people like you are gripped by a disease.” - Roy said while going out of the room.

Alex went into his room and cried for hours, before finally calling the one person he knew would understand. His aunt. His lesbian aunt.

“Aunt V….um….I don’t know how to say this, but I am queer.” - Alex said soon hoping that she would not have a reaction like his father.

“CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!” - Vivian said.

Alex’s heart lightened, that at least someone was celebrating it. Soon he started crying and could hear from the phone Vivian talking with her wife Vanessa about the ordeal.

“CONGRATULATIONS ALEX!!!!!!!!!!!” - Vanessa said through the phone.

“Don’t cry. We all accept you and let’s have a party some other time when you have come out to Roy as well.” - Vivian said and at those words Alex started stuttering.

“I…..d...did come…..out...to….him. It was horrible.” - Alex said.

Soon, he found himself retelling everything to his aunts. How he had known it al three years ago, how he started figuring it out, how he figured stuff out, how he waited to write the best possible letter, how he came out, and how the reaction that Roy had had.

“We’re coming over right now. Don’t worry, it will be okay.” - Vivian said and hung up the phone.

An hour later, she along with Vanessa were at Roy’s house.