I looked over my dungeon, no—not really mine yet, Fluffle’s dungeon, and felt… irritated.

It was just absolutely zero effort. A single boxy corridor, expanding straight into the hillside. I looked at the cat lounging on my feet. Was he really just that lazy? Or was this something more?

He seemed perfectly at ease, lying out in the open with nothing but the cold and hard rock around him. No cover from the entrance. Why? The dungeon it was just like a trap, like a—

Box.

My eyes opened wide in realization, and I looked over the cat again, this time with my newfound dungeon senses. That form, pudgy and soft though it was—it wasn’t his real form, was it? And the gem hanging from his collar—that too was just a representation.

No—his true form, it was the space inside here. Inside this box.

“Fluffles—now that you are back inside your dungeon, how do you feel?”

He stretched a bit, arching his back. “Ah, it is very nice indeed to be back home. A ruler deserves a proper throne. This place is just right—perfectly snug for my purposes.”

I silently cursed. A cat in a box. Of course.

Now that I thought about it, being constrained just a bit on all sides felt sort of nice, I could just ooze inside a box and—no.

I slapped myself. My tail was weaving around in agitation. No, I won’t let my newfound catness carry me away. I’m not becoming a box cat.

Breathing deep, I entered business mode. Time to interrogate the cat more.

I sat down by the dungeon’s entrance, just so the light of day still struck the insides nicely—and motioned Fluffles over. He naturally strutted into my lap, then curled up inside there. I started petting him.

“Fuffles, fluffles, fluffles. I have some questions to ask of you.”

“Hm? You may do so, I grant permission.”

“How exactly does this dungeon business work? What is our goal here? How do we start earning?”

“Well—” the cat began, thinking over his words. “—usually, we arrange some sort of resource for adventurers to gain first. Loot, experience, training, they just crave all those things. Then we put a fake core somewhere, so they feel reassured that things are under control. Then we hide the real one a bit deeper. They come, delve and the deeper we get them in, the more mana we get. Especially if they die.”

I nodded—that seemed pretty sensible. “So the adventurers don’t know cores think like you do?”

He grinned, cat teeth sharp. “Of course not, they think we are just mindless natural phenomena. They cannot comprehend my true cunning.”

I patted him on the head and bent down to whisper by his ear. “So—mister great intellect—why does your dungeon have none of that?”

He froze, tail stiff.

It took him a moment to gather himself and answer, but eventually, he spoke, hesitantly. “Well—I might be a pretty new arrival here—as things were. No time to get set up and all that. Got kicked out of my last place—you see?”

“And when were you planning to start setting up?”

“I had plans! Just—after my nap, you see? And then it sort of stretched, and I eventually summoned you…”

I was starting to get the picture. “Exactly how many dungeons have you been forced to vacate, oh mister rank-F [Cat Core].”

He curled up, hiding his head. “I would rather not say…”

A cat grown fat, who had forgotten how to catch prey. I shook my head, tutting. This would not do— this would not do at all.

I picked him up, then placed him inside on the floor. “Well then, it is time for your first task.”

“You are giving me a job?”

I flashed a cunning smile at him. “If you do well, I will build you a very nice box indeed—much nicer than this cold and damp one.”

His ears twitched, but he turned his head, not looking my way. “—It’s not like I’m interested, alright, but do go on, if you would.”

I had him.

“Well—have you considered fashioning an abode of wood? A rather pleasant material. Just imagine scratching it all up with sharp claws…”

My ears started twitching too, and I noticed my claws were out. Damnit. These instincts are too much!

But Fluffles was panting now, eyes hungry, staring at me. “I—I will consider it. What would my task be?”

I pointed at the cavern around us. “You can use half the mana we have right now, but you need to shape this cave more. Turn it into a place for hunting. Imagine a legion of cats your size, prowling through nooks and hidden tunnels, stalking their prey. Surely a [Cat Core] can produce such a place.”

He was nodding, seemingly pleased with the idea himself too. “Yes—I can do that. I can definitely do that.”

I pushed him off with a foot, deeper into the dungeon. “Off you go then. Make haste, we don’t know when more foes will come.”

He bounded deeper into the dungeon, a glow of mana beginning to manifest around him. I nodded—good. One job done.

Then I turned to my briefcase, which was lying by me. I took a bullet out, dropped it onto the floor, and watched the dungeon absorb it.

[9mm bullet absorbed! 9 more needed for unlock.]

I dropped 9 more onto the floor.

[You have unlocked 9mm bullets! 1 mana = 1 bullet]

I frowned—not quite the ratio I had been hoping for. But it was something. Next, I looked over my dungeon stats. We had 10 dungeon points—what could I do with them?

As if summoned, a new prompt appeared.

[Would you like to access the Dungeon Shop?]

I nodded—yes.

[Listing Available Categories: Monsters, Materials, Traps, Decorations, Loot, Weapons, Luxury Items]

Hmm, interesting. I could unlock things by absorbing them into the dungeon, or by using these dungeon points. Was there a difference?

There were many options available, but I did have certain needs… If I considered this dungeon half my property, taking away half the dungeon points for personal use should be fine, right?

I don’t work for no pay.

[Opening category: Luxury Items]

I looked over the options, nodding. Good, pretty much everything I needed was available here.

[You have bought 1 personal hygiene set for 1 dungeon point!]

[You have bought 1 comfortable bedding set for 1 dungeon point!]

[You have bought 1 basic coffee set for 1 dungeon point!]

[You have bought 1 basic tea set for 1 dungeon point!]

[You have bought 1 set of a week’s rations for 1 dungeon point!]

The items materialized in front of me, and I nodded, satisfied. I could live with this, for a while at least.

While I had been shopping, the three kittens had arrived to snoop around. They were now deep inside my bedding, rolling about and sniffing curiously.

I grimaced. Not due to their antics—they were pretty cute, but because they were the only dungeon mobs we could summon right now. We had [Summon Catgirl], but our capacity was limited to one currently—me. Then we had [Summon Cat], which really should have been renamed [Summon Kitten].

Looking at the cute darlings, I shook my head. No way was I going to risk them getting hurt in all this. I needed different soldiers. I turned back to my shop.

[Opening category: Monsters]

I grimaced at the prices. [Summon Big Cat] was a hefty 10 dungeon points—but I did not regret my other purchases. There were precious few options available besides that one… except a few that seemed tailor-made for my current purpose.

[Summon Zombie Cat] and [Summon Bone Cat], both priced at 5 dungeon points. I could afford that—and I wouldn’t feel particularly bad about them being smashed up by adventurers. They would do just fine.

But which one? Zombie cats… just imagining the smell—no. That would not do. And if the kittens took a liking to ripping them apart…

[You have unlocked Bone Cats for 5 dungeon points!]

I looked over my dungeon controls, then nodded at the new ability in there. 1 mana per bone cat, and we had 7 free slots for mob cats right now.

Then I pointed my hand at the meadow outside and began activating the spell.

1 bone cat, 2 bone cats—3, 4, 5, 6, and then 7bone cats.

They all rose up, one by one, puffing up into existence. The three existing kittens peered curiously at the new arrivals, sniffing and rubbing their noses.

The bone cats were larger—about the same size as Fluffles. And they had sharp claws and scary teeth. Though they too…

I bent down, embracing all 7 into a big hug, and held them close. “I’m sorry darlings, but you will be our warriors for now. The sacrifices so adventurers have something to kill.”

It almost brought a tear to my eye—just imagining them getting crushed and pounded to smithereens…

“What are you crying for?” An arrogant voice asked from behind me.

I wiped snot off from my nose, and my voice broke. “The sacrifices these brave kittens will go through—it’s all too much…”

He raised an eyebrow. “But they’ll just pop back in eventually with a bit of mana.”

I rose up, face instantly back to normal. “Oh, I suppose that’s fine then. Are you done”

He nodded eagerly. “I’ve made tunnels and snaking passages and twists and turns and…” He panted, looking around manically. “Where is my wooden box?”

I held a hand up. “Be patient just a moment, I’m not done yet. Why don’t you get our new arrivals all acclimated to our fresh dungeon?”

He pouted, turning and lifting his butt at me, then strutted back inside. “Well, I suppose I can do that. But you best hurry. I am not a patient ruler.”

Turning back to the great outdoors, I nodded. I was only getting started, a dreary cavern wasn’t really a proper place for a cat. Or a catgirl.

And I doubted we could offer anything interesting or worthwhile for adventurers just yet… We needed a draw. And I had some experience in how to market cats.

I looked over my purchases, focusing on two. A tea set and a coffee set. I took them up, then began carrying them all outside.

Our dungeon's influence extended outdoors a decent bit, a floor 0 of sorts. Why should that floor 0 be empty?

And with all the trees around here… I put my sunglasses back on.

I had the material. It was time to build my café.

 

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