Allowing himself to relax only made the pain grow stronger.

Taking a deep breath, his face already sweaty, ZaiWin¹Literally zai (blade) + win (chaos). forced himself to sit up.

The first thing he saw was blood everywhere, darkening the recently revolved dirt. No wonder he was starting to feel dizzy. From the knee down his left leg was beyond broken, it was completely shattered, his foot dangling listlessly to one side, twisted in a very unnatural way.

More tears flooded his eyes and he couldn’t stop himself from sobbing, his shoulders shaking. There was no way that leg would ever heal properly again, he knew. He’d be more than lucky if he didn’t end up loosing it altogether. ZenTar was going to kill him. And yet he really, really wanted ZenTar²Literally zen (silent) + tar (wind). to be there, with him, even if he was going to scold him and smack him.

Forcing himself to take a deep breath, he wiped his tears and pushed all those fears away. ZenTar wasn’t there. He was not going to magically appear out of nowhere just because he wanted.

He was on his own. And so he had to deal with his present situation the best way he could. Besides, even though ZenTar wasn’t there his voice was always present in his mind, his many lessons engraved in his brain.

If you ever get hurt the first thing you must do is find a safe place where you can rest and maybe wait for help to come. Never stay outside, out in the open. Your enemies will have no trouble finding you like that. And wild animals are always attracted to weak prey.

Nodding as if the older man were standing right there, he studied his leg with a more clinical approach.

Be careful not to leave a trail if you are bleeding.

ZaiWin nodded again and started to undress his tunic. The blanket he’d given the small child would have really come in handy right now, but it was no use wishing for what he could not have.

FeiWan³Literally fei (raging / furious) + wan (fire) had told him that he would send someone to get him, but he didn’t trust them at all. He clenched his teeth and frowned, holding his voice in, controlling his breathing, as he went through the excruciating task of wrapping his tunic around his shattered leg. He didn’t trust that FeiWan would actually send someone back for him. But it was better if he didn’t anyway. He trusted the Calzai⁴Literally cal (bright) + zai (blade), or Blade of Light. It can be translated in common language as General, one of military leaders of the Empire. Each Province has it’s own Calzai.’s men even less.

Belonging to the Hao⁵Literally hao (fertile / abundant). Where Hao is the name of the Clan, also the name of a Province. Province, to the El’Dai⁶Literally el (supreme) + dai (light). Name given to the Empress’s Province, some of them could have easily been tasked with the mission to kill him if they got the chance. He had no doubts that at least the El’Dai truly wanted him dead, and he doubted that she would pass on this invaluable opportunity to catch him away from home and from ZenTar’s protection. Finding him out there, all alone and injured, was clearly the most desirable scenario for any assassin.

No. He had to get out of that place. Find somewhere safe where he could spend the next few days. Now that he could no longer walk, much less run, he’d be left behind anyway. He would much rather stay somewhere where no one else knew where to find him. He would stay hidden until the end of the Gathering. The problem was … how was he suppose to get out of there?

The soft sound of rustling leaves made his heart jump and he quickly turned towards it, focusing the rest of his energy into a single, deadly daitai⁷Literally dai (light) + tai (mark), or Holly Markings, considered Heavenly Blessings. They’re the source of power. Using it right now would most likely render him unconscious. But whatever it might be, human or animal, he refused to go out without a fight!

The small head that popped out from behind a tree confused him for a moment. His vision was going dangerously blurry and he had to squint and blink in order to make sense of what was watching him.

As if it had deemed that in his current conditions ZaiWin did not posed a threat, the small thing moved out from behind the tree and cautiously approached him. It walked on two legs, so it was definitely human. But it was way too small to be any of the other boys. And then he recalled the small child he’d helped before!

Wiping his tears and blinking some more, he was finally able to see the child’s small dirty face more clearly. How come he was here again? Had he been following him?, ZaiWin coldly suspected, until his tired mind reminded him that that was impossible, since he’d been portalled by NimRen⁸Literally nim (gentle) + ren (river)’s crystal to FeiWan’s location.

Standing right beside him, the child was looking at his leg with a horrified expression on his face, his small lips gaping soundlessly at the bloody mess. The poor kid had probably never seen a bleeding wound, much less laid eyes upon such a gruesome thing like a limb completely shattered and twisted beyond repair.

And so ZaiWin forced himself to smile, not wanting to be the cause of any future trauma for the small one.

“It’s … not that bad …” he tried to say, his voice sounding dry and laced with pain. He could hardly breathe and the constant loss of blood was making dizzy, dark spots taking over his sight here and there. “What are you doing here …? Didn’t I tell you … to go home …? It’s not safe here … They will soon … come back …” and he wanted to be far away from that place before that happened!, he reminded himself but still couldn’t bring himself to even try to stand.

The child at his side closed his mouth but then opened it again, still staring at his shredded leg. The poor thing really looked as if he were in shock.

“Hey … can’t you hear me? Go already!” He tried to sound more commanding and the child blinked, turning those huge black eyes to him. A frown marked his young forehead but, somehow, the resolve in those dark eyes made ZaiWin stop trying to order him around.

Covering the small space between them the little one tried to go around him and stand at his back, but his path was immediately blocked by a long, suddenly firm arm. Raising his gaze to try and understand what had happened, the child was faced with the coldest, most threatening expression he had ever seen in his short life.

“What are you doing?” ZaiWin asked in a low tone, his daitai burning again, threatening to escape his control, but the black eyes staring at him simply blinked, obviously scared but also clearly unable to understand what he meant.

He hated having people standing behind him! Even ZenTar, who obviously knew him better than anyone, was no exception. And right now he was completely naked from the waist up, which only made things worse. In his urgency to try and somehow stop the bleeding from his leg he had completely forgotten about what using his tunic to that end would entail.

Above all, never let fear and panic take over your actions. Always make sure you act after carefully considering the whole picture.

Yeah. He had failed at that. And the mere thought that not only that child, but all the others might soon see his back, left a new, much darker kind of fear coiling in his chest.

He was so lost in his own thoughts and in the dark consequences of his silly actions, that he only realized that the little one had slipped beneath his arm all too late.

The deadly instinct of self-preservation that had saved his lives a few times but, at the same time, caused unspeakable destruction, immediately kicked in. But a small pull shook his weakened body and brought a lancinating pain to his leg, making him clench his teeth and successfully breaking his instinctive response to fight back. Another small pull immediately followed, and then another, and he quickly understood what the little one was trying to do.

“Wai-wait. Wait …” he gasped, his entire body drenched in sweat, and the pressure on his leather belt disappeared, before a small head popped right next to him, to see what had happened. “You can’t just … drag me away …” he breathed. He was way too big and way too heavy for such a small child to carry. Not to mention that he would probably be dead from blood loss in no time at all. “Do you … still have … the things I gave you?”

A quick nod was all the reply he got and then the little one was running towards the trees.

ZaiWin took the time to catch his breath. Wiping the sweat from his burning forehead with the back of his hand, he knew he was running a fever. Feeling increasingly dizzy, the greenery around him turning and shifting, he was suddenly sure that he would die in that forest. Even if he could somehow manage to get away from the others, miraculously finding a place where the Calzai’s men wouldn’t find him. There was no way he could survive another four days without appropriate medical care. Feeling his heart heavy he wanted to cry again. He wanted ZenTar to come and pick him up. He wanted his mother to hug him and lull him to sleep.

Silvareiel

4 more chapters to go till the end of this Arc. Still have to work a bit more on the last one, though. Already went through it twice but I'm still not happy with it. And then we'll be back to the Present timeline. I do enjoy writing about ZaiWin's childhood but right now I really miss Snow. ^_^